You always hear me talking about “The No Contact Rule” and how great it is.
Heck, I’ve written close to twenty articles covering it throughout the history of this website.
I’ve even done my own independent studies where I have looked through my individual success stories helping women get back with their exes and determined if the no contact rule was a major factor in that success.
Hint Hint: It is as I found that over 70% of my successes have utilized the no contact rule in some way, shape or form.
But you want to know the one thing I have never done before?
I have never compiled those success stories in one place and dissected them for you.
Until today!
Honestly, I don’t know why I didn’t think of this sooner.
I guess I am going to have to give credit to the women who are a part of my private support group who are constantly yearning for proof.
You see, they want to see the no contact rule work more than anyone as most of them are literally in the middle of one as we speak. To them it’s a light at the end of the tunnel.
I have always felt that my big claim to fame as a breakup consultant is the fact that I think I have more success stories out there than anyone.
And today I am going to prove it by showing them to you!
What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?
Take the quizThe No Contact Rule Success Story #1: Anna
Some of the more well read readers of this article may recognize the name “Anna.”
Well, that’s because I have her success story posted throughout the site.
But I suppose you want the proof, eh?
So, let’s get to the fun part and dissect this situation for a second.
My wife Jennifer and I helped Anna out a lot (not that she needed it she’s a total badass.)
Breakdown of Her Situation
- She was in a long distance relationship
- She was engaged to her ex
- She was in the middle of NC
- The was something VERY important she needed to get at her exes house
And that’s where our story is going to pick up.
You see, I learned a long time ago that there are certain circumstances where it’s ok to break the no contact rule quickly if you have important items that you need to retrieve from your ex.
That was the case for Anna so she was allowed to break the no contact rule.
What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?
Take the quizWhat I wasn’t counting on was that it was during this interaction of getting her items back from her ex that she got him to ask her to be back.
Here Is My Hypothesis On Why The No Contact Rule Worked
We know that she was in the middle of the no contact rule (17 days to be exact) when she was forced to get her things back from her exes place. Now, while Anna was totally freaking out about it her ex was probably doing the same thing.
17 days of silence is a long time for a man and while he hadn’t reached out to her. I am betting it was some type of ploy on his part to see if she’d reach out to first.
As every day passed and she didn’t reach out he became more and more agitated, slowly realizing just how much he missed her.
It all came to a boiling point when Anna had to get her things from him.
Seeing her was probably just too much and he had to have her back.
Now, Anna deserves all the credit for her killer strategy of seeing her ex in person (again, watch that interview) but I think the no contact rule definitely enhanced it because it worked him up and made him realize just what he had lost.
No Contact Rule Success Story #2: A Random Girl From Our Support Group
So, while success story #1 was about a woman who got her ex back I’d like to switch things up a bit and talk about some of the amazing things that the no contact rule can make men do.
So, here is the lowdown on this situation.
This woman was in the middle of the no contact rule when she heard her doorbell ring.
She went to see who it was she was greeted to a flower delivery man with a note from her ex.
Remember, she is in the middle of the no contact rule and he asked her on a date!
So, what do we think happened here?
My Hypothesis For Why The No Contact Rule Worked
The “NC” has a funny way of bringing out what we are really feeling.
But here is the funny thing.
Women often take a short sighted view on this.
They fail to realize that the no contact rule isn’t only affecting them, it’s affecting their exes as well even if it doesn’t seem like it is.
I’ll give you an example.
Women will often ask me,
Chris, what if he doesn’t contact me during the no contact rule? Does it mean that it’s not working?
I can’t tell you how many success stories I have come across where this has happened (look at no contact rule success story #1.) Usually all it means is that your ex is one stubborn SOB and he has resided himself to making you be the one to contact him first.
What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?
Take the quizClick To Pick Up Your Copy of My eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book”
But I am getting off topic here.
In this particular circumstance this woman used the no contact rule on her ex and if affected him so much that he felt the need to send her flowers and ask her on a date.
Now, was it only because of the no contact rule that he did this?
No, I think it would be arrogant of me to say that.
Instead, I think it’s a testament to how great this particular woman’s relationship with him was. It was so good that it made it easy for him to miss her and he took action to win her back.
No Contact Rule Success Story #3: The Never Initiated Girl
Now, I don’t want you to be reading this and get a big head that this is a typical result because it’s not.
However, every once in a while we get a pretty awesome NC success story like this,
So, this one is pretty straight forward.
When it comes to the no contact rule I usually recommend three different time frames.
- The 21 Day Rule
- The 30 Day Rule
- The 45 Day Rule
Now, to be perfectly honest with you I can’t remember exactly which no contact rule time frame that this particular girl chose but one thing is for sure.
Even after her no contact rule time frame was up she didn’t initiate a conversation with him at all.
She simply waited and he came to her and asked for her back.
In other words, the only actual strategy she tried that I recommended was the no contact rule. Therefore we can assume that the no contact rule played a huge factor into her success.
My Hypothesis For Why The No Contact Rule Worked For Her
Are you beginning to see a common theme among our success stories?
It seems like a lot of the men who come back to their exes as a result of the no contact rule begin missing them in an extreme way.
And if I were a betting man that is what I would say happened here.
It’s a case of a man being left alone with his own thoughts for a long time and coming to the realization of what he lost.
No Contact Rule Success Story #4: Jessy
Jesse has a really interesting story in the fact that SHE was the one who broke up with her ex.
You see, Jesse had been married before and thought that she was ready for the next step with her boyfriend at the time and believe it or not he agreed. However, she asked him to go to couples counseling with her so they could make sure they resolve any issues they had before they entered into a life long commitment.
Well, as I am sure you can imagine that didn’t go over too well with her boyfriend and he broke up with her.
What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?
Take the quizThat’s when Jesse found Ex Boyfriend Recovery and well, just watch.
If you want to learn more about her situation without watching the whole video I recommend you read the post I wrote on her here.
But here is the quick cliff notes version.
- Jessy did the 30 day no contact rule
- Even though it went against what she thought was right she decided to reach out to him first
- He told her immediately that he was glad she reached out.
- He missed her so much
- Blah, blah, blah
- Now they are married!
Like I said, read the article I wrote on them!
Why The No Contact Rule Worked On Jessy’s Ex
I have a lot of data on this particular success story as it relates to the no contact rule since I did an hour long interview with Jessy and got to hear exactly what her ex said to her after she reached out to him post NC.
This is a quote from our interview,
So, I later learned that in his mind he was like, “Fine, if she’s not going to contact me, as much as my heart is hurting, I refuse to contact her.”
So, what we have here is a stubborn ex who put his foot down and decided to not contact her during the no contact period no matter what.
But what is interesting is what he did once she contacted him.
It’s almost as if instantaneously he switched gears and went from the “I’m not going to contact her” mentality to the “I miss you so much” mentality.
Again, our common theme comes up!
No Contact Rule Success Story #5: Jellybean!
And for our last no contact rule success story of the day I thought we would do something fun and go “old school” by picking one of the comment success stories from the old version of our website.
I’d like to introduce you to Jellybean,
Jellybean is actually one of my favorite success stories to quote for a couple of reasons,
Firstly, it shows how capable my team is at helping you guys when I can’t.
Secondly, who can say no to someone named Jellybean?
Alright, so here is the breakdown of her situation.
After the breakup with her ex boyfriend Jellybean did what most women tend to do.
She went crazy trying to beg and plead for her ex back. However, eventually she came to her senses and decided to implement the no contact rule. Once she did that and really spent her time focusing on making sure she was doing it properly she started to see some success.
Eventually her ex asked for her back and they lived happily ever after!
Actually I haven’t heard from Jellybean in two years so I am assuming they are still together.
How can I make that assumption?
Well, usually if people have a positive experience on this website they will visit it again once they go through another breakup.
Anyways, Why Did The No Contact Rule Work For Jellybean?
I think the important thing to note here is the fact that Jellybean did not follow the EBR breakup protocol of immediately jumping into the no contact rule.
Instead, she did what most women do unfortunately.
She begged…
She pleaded…
She cried…
She basically did everything she wasn’t supposed to do.
Now, by doing that her ex boyfriend started to make certain assumptions about her.
Assumption #1 = She misses me more than I miss her
Assumption #2 = She is a little over emotional
Assumption #3 = I am winning the breakup
Now, I may not know much (lie) but one thing I do know is that men often don’t take their ex girlfriend back when they make these assumptions.
But Jellybean did a really smart thing.
She got really serious about the no contact rule and jumped right into it and slowly but surely his assumptions started getting replaced with these,
New Assumption = Maybe she doesn’t miss me as much as I thought…
New Assumption = Maybe she isn’t as over emotional as I thought…
New Assumption = I am losing this breakup…
And I think we all know what happens to a man once he has these assumptions.
Lost and in love
October 23, 2020 at 4:03 pm
Hello
My ex boyfriend broke up with me a little over a month ago. We broke up because he doesn’t think he will ever want marriage in his life nor live with a person ( I did not pressure him. Just wanted to make sure we were headed in the right direction) we have been together 4 years. We also have had this discussion a few times. Sometimes he would mention marriage or future plans without me saying a word, and prior to the breakup we went away together and had an amazing time. Anyhow every week my would call. The first few times I answered I would cry and be pathetic. Telling him how much I loved him. Well last week I didn’t answer and the next day he texted and when I did not reply he called. I did answer then and was firm. I told him I was moving on and at peace with the breakup. He told me that he thought it would get easier but it’s only getting harder for him. He said he didn’t see this (us being apart) lasting. He also said that maybe this breakup is a good thing and make him realize certain things. But he said he didn’t wanna come back until he was sure because when he does it will be for good. Anyhow he said he would text me and he didn’t. He didn’t call me till 6 days later and I was week again. I cried a bit. Asked him if he wanted the breakup and he said he couldn’t give me a definite answer. I told him I want him back but only when he realizes what a terrible mistake he made and wants to change. I also told him not to contact me anymore. He told me he wouldn’t and said goodbye kinda irritated and that was that. My question to you is am I doing the right thing?? I want him back so bad but I feel like I’ve been to available. Will NC work in my case???!
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
October 28, 2020 at 4:49 am
Hey there, yes it will work if you stick with it and work on yourself in the mean time, letting your ex see you progressing in live from the outside is going to get him reaching out to you by the end of your NC (if he takes notice of your social media). Just make sure that you spend your no contact, reading articles and working on yourself. Pay attention to the articles about being Ungettable and the Holy Trinity – this is going to help you become the best version of yourself and get your ex questioning if he made a mistake ending things with you.
If he was serious about not wanting to live with someone and get married, then I would take this on board before getting back together. People always hope that their partner will change their minds in the end, and when they dont the break up and heartbreak comes back around. Be aware that you may not get this, with this person.
Bubbles
August 9, 2020 at 6:17 am
I posted a comment about my story in one of the most recent posts, but strangely I don’t see it there. I really hope i get a reply…My ex is in the army. However, for him it is mandatory for him to do it. That’s the rule of his country. Considering that he is in the army and he can actually use his phone everyday (weekdays 5:30pm-9:00pm, weekends 7:00am-9:00pm) unless he is in training, i am having a debate on whether i should do 21 days or 30 days of NC? (I am now in day 10 of NC. I did begging and pleading which obviously wasn’t a good idea. Got him to talk to me, though and decided to be friends. Then one day, out of the blue decided to just not see my messages and stop replying. I was very very confused because he had told me that his boss changed. The new boss being very strict and making his base do all this type of training, i sent him texts for 4days “hey are you okay? What’s wrong? Etc” and then on the type of sns (which is not the type that many people are aware of because it is a type of sns that is mainly used in his country and not that much in other countries) that we kept in contact, he put a depressing song. Then I realized he wasn’t gonna reply so i decided to do NC. Before disappearing he told me (after i sent him a long text about how i had never asked him for a chance before and that me doing it this time meant i was pretty serious about me changing and becoming a better person and wanting to work out our relationship, etc) “me too, i am uncomfortable losing you. We both learned from our mistakes. It’s not that you don’t deserve a chance, it’s that i am not ready for that.” Many times he told me “I don’t love you anymore. How can we start again? Don’t bother me, etc” and 2 days before disappearing, he strangely apologized to me about saying “I don’t love you anymore (like the many times he said it) Don’t bother me! Can you date someone you don’t love?” His apology was “i’m sorry i got angry”…. I really don’t know which NC I should do….
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
August 11, 2020 at 8:35 pm
Hey Bubbles, I would suggest that you follow the 30 days NC where you only work on yourself and do not reply to anything that he sends you in that time. You need to spend some time working on yourself and follow the advice of the Ungettable information
Gina
May 19, 2020 at 8:56 pm
My boyfriend and I talked for a year but had only been official for 7 months. On our 7th month anniversary he was sweet and telling me he loves me and how I make his life better and make him happy. Two days later, we had an argument and he was done with me. He told me he had lost his feelings and this relationships not what he wanted anymore. He use to tell me he’s never connected with another girl like he has with me before early on in our relationship. I did what I’m not supposed to do, I cried and asked him for another chance and tried “convincing” him we were good for each other. He just gave me the cold shoulder like I was some stranger and he just did not care about me or if I was with another man. I asked him if I still crossed his mind a day ago and he said I do. Today I decided to start the No Contact Rule, I don’t know if it’s even going to work on him. I do believe we connected on a whole other level and we had made so many memories with each other.
Seems like the problem is he knows he still has me. He knows if he wants he can just get back with me, thats why he’s not hurting as much as I am. I’m still emotionally available to him and he knows it, he knows this relationship is still there if he wants it. Thats the problem, he needs to realize I CAN leave and he CAN lose me.
Jane
May 9, 2020 at 8:17 pm
Hi, my boyfriend and I broke up 1 month ago, I was begging, pleading and crying to him. The last time we talk he told me that he’s never coming back and that he doesn’t love me anymore. the last message I sent him was really bad I told him that “Karma” will take care of him. We’ve been fighting a lot for 4 months due to his time and he became more and more busy and when we’re having an argument he will just leave me, ignore me and not talk to me. We broke up many times but I pleaded and used logic and reasoning (which is bad I know). Every time i’ll tell him something or open up he’ll get mad at me and blame me for starting a nonsense argument. (Even though my only intention was to ask not to argue). Our breakup was bad, He was telling me painful and harsh words and he said he doesn’t care if I get hurt. I wasn’t fighting back and I kept on telling him how sorry I was but he kept on blaming me that it was all my fault because I was like this (Always starting an argument), the painful part is that his friends were also telling me that it was all my fault that my ex didn’t do anything bad to me but the fact that he was ignoring me for months, and making me feel like i’m nothing is what made me crave for his time and became more and more clingy to him. 2 days of begging and pleading he was ignoring me which made me say nasty things too because I was super angry at him, btw we’ve been together for 1.5 years we had a lot of fun memories we go out a lot, watch netflix, laugh a lot, make love a lot too (sexually). and we planned our futures (he’s 21 now and i’m 20) i’ve been there for him when time became rough his whole family got mad at him and kicked him out of the house, his friends got mad at him too but I never leaved. he also cheated on my during the 1st months of us dating together, I left him for that but came back after a week because i didn’t lose hope on him changing. (Which he did change after) He always told me that I am the only girl who loved him like that and that he saw me as a wife. He was full of effort during the first 7 months of being together but as his life began to build up and he’s friends and family loves him again he became less interested in me and just threw me away, I just felt bad because He was nothing and I was there he was afraid to let me go but when everything came back he just threw me out like I didn’t do good anything for him he even told my sister that I wasn’t treating him like a boyfriend. He blocked me on everything facebook, instagram, calls and messages because he was irritated to me. I was crying for 2 weeks ad became depressed I wasn’t even eating and getting out of the bed. As I mentioned earlier the last time we talked I was begging, pleading and crying and he told me that “I don’t love you anymore, I became more healthy and happy the moment I got rid of you, I will never coming back and I don’t want to be friends with you I feel nothing with you. Not everyone deserves a closure” those words he told me is what made me stop talking to him I didn’t reply. I started no contact, after 5 days he messaged my sister on facebook and it was very long as it looks like a goodbye ending message but I will just state his points, he’s saying the opposite thing “I still love her I just can’t take it anymore and we deserve closure but didn’t make it. I don’t want to talk to her ever again for I can’t take another harsh words from her. Please take care and look after her” we think he was doing a reverse psychology on his self. he was the one harsh on me but he poured all of his mistakes on me. Which makes the break up so much more heavier to me. We broke up on april 14 and I started no contact on april 22, I am now on 18th day of no contact and he hasn’t reached out. My friends also told me that he was posting status on facebook saying he deserves better that he won’t settle for less and that he made a decision and he won’t look back. he also posted a picture of us with a caption done. he did those statuses after the break up. (Maybe he was too confident since all the power was all at his hands). I told my friends not to talk to me about him for I don’t want any updates of him I want to focus on myself. During the no contact I stopped crying and became better I was even happy and thinking I don’t want him back but I want him to realize what he did to me, and all the blame he gave me will he ever see the good things I did to him? I think he’s still in relief stage until now he looks happy on his pictures and he drinks a lot every night.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
May 19, 2020 at 1:48 pm
Hi Jane, so I would suggest that if you want your ex to regret losing you that you now stop talking to your friends about him and show them how you are moving on from him and doing well with your life. Work on your Holy Trinity and read and work on becoming Ungettable so that you then show him what he lost when he eventually snoops on your social media. You need to not ask about him or want to see what he is doing, this is a case of you moving your mentality to focusing on yourself so that he realises you are not sat around waiting for him anymore
swat
February 6, 2020 at 8:47 am
Hey ,
I have been with a guy since last 1 year almost. we never really gave any name to our relationship. I was the one who kept telling him that we won’t have a future coz he is 28 and I am 21. Now that the time came close to part our ways. he came out of love from me and I want him all the more in my life now. But now he says that after being into constant BTs he is now in the zone that he doesn’t see our future too and asked me to stay friends with him .. I told him that I will not contact him its been 3 days and he didn’t care to reply or contact…. I want him to come back should I go with no contact rule coz i am afraid that he will forget me.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
February 6, 2020 at 9:44 pm
Hey Swat so you need to take some time in No contact and then work on yourself in that time. Avoid speaking with him at all and make sure oyu do not reply to him if he reaches out to you within 30 days
Elexis
January 23, 2020 at 1:06 pm
My bf and I have been together for almost a year and we swore we were meant. He was my soulmate. But he’s been battling depression a lot with himself, the relationship, and having to take care of his mom. I tried everything to help him by helping him find a job, motivating him to go out with friends, etc. the trust issues didn’t matter to me anymore if it meant making him depressed. He cried begging me to stay and didn’t want to lose me. But he went ghost on me.
Mel
January 8, 2020 at 1:05 pm
Hi Chris,
I was seeing a guy for about 5 and a half months. At the beginning of it all he made it clear he was going on a Europe trip for 2 months and wanted to travel without commitments. Problem is, our relationship developed and we became closer and closer. He then began to feel guilty about the whole situation which led us to many discussions about what we should do. He felt he was leading me on and couldn’t stand to see me hurt. We recently ended things and said it was best we went our seperate ways since we could not be friends as we never began that way. He would always tell me that there’s a chance after his Europe trip but never wanted me to wait around for him as it wasn’t fair on me. Overall he is honestly an amazing guy and I cannot fault him since he was 100% honest the whole time. I strongly believe he needs this time on his own to discover himself. I haven’t contacted him and I won’t but I fear he will forget me. What is it you’d suggest in this instance ?
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
January 11, 2020 at 5:52 am
Hi Mel, so he is not going to forget you, hes going travelling around Europe so hes just going to experience something and wants to enjoy it without worrying about if he has or has not called you today etc. Let him enjoy that break, you enjoy yours and see how you stand when he get back to you.
Sarah
December 16, 2019 at 1:21 pm
Hey this is my story,
I was with my boyfriend for 6 months. Within 2 weeks of meeting he wanted to be exclusive and gave me keys to his apartment. We’d been on a couple of holidays together and had a great few months, no arguments, just a great time. He was very sweet and affectionate and we both agreed we were so lucky to meet. We had talked about future holidays and moving in together further down the line.
Then, he went away for work for 2 weeks on a very stressful job. The first week communication was normal, but the second he was much less in touch. Then, after not hearing from him for a while I asked him if he was just busy or if something was up. He said he was busy at work but something didn’t feel right. He kept saying he didn’t know what to do so I asked him if he wanted to end it, he said he didn’t know. Eventually he said he felt he needed to be alone and his gut was telling him he wasn’t ready for this, that he couldn’t give me what I deserved. He suffers from bad anxiety and I know this affects him, especially at work. We haven’t spoken since it happened, which was just over a week ago. We still have keys to each others places and need to exchange belongings. I just don’t know if I should move on or if he needs time.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
December 21, 2019 at 11:19 pm
Hey Sarah so I would spend some time getting over him in no contact and read about being ungettable, and then start dating casually just to see how you feel about new possible guys short term you can reach out to your ex if you feel that you still want him back in 30 days time
K
December 3, 2019 at 6:10 pm
Hi, my bf wanted a break up a week ago, we have since met up twice for exchanging things. We are in a sort of long distance relationship (1 hour apart) for a year. The reason why he wanted to end things is because of the distance and he couldnt stand not having me by his side all the time. There is no way to change things for now although we will eventually be back together in a few years time. I tried to logically convince him why we should stay together and he softened up and said give him 2 months to think. We still have super strong feelings for each other. Should I not contact him at all for the 2 months he asked for?
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
December 6, 2019 at 9:29 pm
Hi K, so give him the space he wants, but in the mean time you need to live your life and do your own things showing him youre not going to sit at home waiting for him!! Giving him 2 months is a long time so I suggest 30 days, and if by then he wants to break up accept that decision gracefully and start dating make sure you post hints that you may have met someone else it is going to make him realise that you are a desired woman and that he can not just place you on the side for a future “someday” that might not ever happen
JL
November 20, 2019 at 11:12 am
My boyfriend and I had been in a long distance relationship. However, we broke up because of distance after a month. He said being friends was better as having a love relationship would be harder. I like him and I want to get him back. I think we are meant to each other. He said that I was a very rare girl but we couldn’t stick with time. Both of us were busy, maybe this worsened the situation. We had never met each other in real life. Is it possible to get him back? Thanks.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
November 23, 2019 at 1:37 pm
Hi JL for your best chance of getting him abck you need to follow the program, but what you may find is harder to get him invested if there is no chance of you both being able to meet up in person. The goal of a long distance relationship is that the end goal is that you will be together in the near future. If that cant happen for you both then I would consider how you are going to be able to make it work with your ex in the future. Again, this is your decision to make of course, so following the program and sticking to a No Contact for the time being while you work on yourself and what you want is best method right now
ANON
November 19, 2019 at 2:55 am
Hi,
A week after a wonderful weekend where my bf visited me (from his college to mine-2 hours apart) My bf of four years (we started dating at age 14/15 in the same high school) broke up with me via a text that basically said “I can’t do this anymore” and Brought up behavior from the past that we had already talked through and I had changed that behavior and also said he was too stressed with school (first year of college) that he couldn’t deal with the pressure. He wouldn’t answer my calls or talk to me on the phone, and only answered a few of my texts before he just stopped responding and then stopped sharing his location with me and deleted all of our pictures on his social media. I feel so sad, like a slap in the face. At first I tried to reason with him and told him I loved him and begged, but that night of the breakup I sent a text that said “I am just going to respect your wishes. I wish you nothing but the best and thank you for a great four years” and he just never responded. I haven’t contacted him since even though its really hard. He posted on social media when he never used it when we were together, but he hasn’t reached out in any way. I just feel like he is moving on without any issue and it hurts so bad, especially because the way he ended things just seemed really cruel and confusing, because everyone always said he loved me so much, or that I was the catch. He told me he wanted to marry me and that I was the one all the time and…. just one week before all of this. Do you think NC will work? Do you think I am doing the right thing here? Does he even care?
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
November 23, 2019 at 10:42 pm
Hey, so yes you need to do a proper NC where you do not reach out or reply to him for a 30 day period and in that time you need to work on yourself to be the best version of yourself. following the program is going to give you, your best chance of getting your ex back
Mandy
November 15, 2019 at 8:10 pm
I found out 6 weeks ago that my husband is having an affair. It’s been going on for 6-8 months. He says he loves us both. I need advice for how to implement the NC rule with him in my house, because he will not leave.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
November 18, 2019 at 10:02 pm
Hi Mandy, you need to do something called Limited NC where you only speak to him about shared responsibilities, that would be children bills or emergencies.
BlueBerries
November 3, 2019 at 4:05 pm
Hey,
I need a quick advice in terms of the situation I’m in before I consider purchasing your bundle.
My ex and I have been on and off for the past 7 months. I am quite clingy and overwhelming, he admitted he wants a break from me because he is tired and I am emotionally draining. He’s lost himself and his feelings for me. I was wondering how I could respark that flame? Will the NC rule work? I’ve done it once during an off period, where he contacted me and waited by my door 4 days in, but now i’m not too sure whether NC will work because he’s blocked me on everything and said it’s really time for me to move on.
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
November 9, 2019 at 4:31 pm
Hi BB so you do need to do a NC and you’re blocked at the moment so you have no choice but to do so, read up on what the Ungettable girl is and how to implement it. When you purchase the bundle you will also get the support of the Facebook Group which is really useful when youre blocked for ideas on what to post and how to use the sphere of influence too. So consider it if you really want your ex back. On the other side make sure you read as much as you can on this website (that is valid to your situation) and make sure you take action not just read the words on how to follow this process properly.
Vi
October 21, 2019 at 5:25 am
Hello, we started from a tinder date 1 year ago, to FWB, then 2 months ago, we officialized the relationship which was awesome. However, we’ve been having some ups and downs throughout the year. We would call it quits and come back together but it has always been because of 1 reason, he’s not ready yet but he wants to try. He will make the effort for one week and will go back from the start, selfish thoughts, thinking of him, him and only him. Last time I called it quits, 3 months ago, and applied NC, I got a bouquet on my door with a letter of apology saying he’s a loser and he does not deserve me. Long story short he acted selfishly again, plus he was on the defensive when I confronted him when he finally concluded that we were not the same page, he can’t give me what I need because he loves his freedom as much as he loves me. He’s not settled in his life for the time being(he was 3 years ago with his ex-but after the breakup he’s been having several problems, health, job, personal) that’s the reason he’s not being able to give me what I deserve which is respect and a place in his life. (I know his family and only 1 of his friends) . He’s torn, I can see it. We broke up 2 days ago and asked him to come and take back his stuffs. I started applying NC. Will it work?
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
October 21, 2019 at 8:45 pm
Hi Vi, so following the program correctly is going to give you your best chance of getting him back yes. But remember you have to stick with the advice from No Contact to the texting phase and so on do not rush the value chain or you may more likely fail
Casey
September 30, 2019 at 3:55 pm
Hi Chris!
So my ex broke up with me after 5 years of being together for no reason. The day after he said he’d made a mistake but then I went to see him and he said he needed space and reiterated that we were broken up (which I’m not gonna lie REALLY hurt).
He’s never been one for chasing I always initiated everything in our relationship. Anyway I took your advice and started No Contact 3 weeks into the breakup I’m now 2 weeks into no contact and I’ve not heard anything from him I feel like I’m going crazy; how do I fight this temptation to contact him? What if he’s moved on?
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
October 1, 2019 at 8:11 pm
Hi Casey, he’s not going to move on the way you’re thinking in that short amount of time. Even if he does start dating it isn’t going to have that much of an impact after a 5 year relationship. Stick with your No Contact and in that time work on yourself to be the best version of yourself, making sure that you post some great activities you’ve been doing now and again.
remma
September 19, 2019 at 6:56 am
Hi there,
Me and my ex broke up about 3 weeks ago after dating for 7 months. This is the first time we’ve dated but we’ve had on and off things for around 3 years. Although he did it I was super fine with it. We haven’t been in contact at all but he’s acting super rude and bringing me up to people constantly. Does that mean he still cares? what should I do cause I clearly have some feelings but I want him to come back and I want to show that “I don’t care”, thanks!
EBR Team Member: Shaunna
September 19, 2019 at 8:27 am
Hi Remma, So complete a NC first and from there start the texting phase using the information provided on the website. As for him bad mouthing you to people, rise above it, it may be his anger from the breakup. You know who you are and you know the truth
Alejandra Diaz
August 13, 2019 at 4:25 am
Hi Chris
I been was with my ex for about 9 mos. It was great, I met his family his kids. He has never brought another women after his separation with his ex. I’m the first. Things were great I had a tragic moment in my life that had to do with my ex. I need to deal with his funeral arrangements. When I came back we had lots of issue, happen i discovered some texts from another girl. He said nothing happen. But with all that I didnt trust him anymore. Things got worse more fighting. Well I broke up with him. We were still seeing each other and hanging out at family event. But as tone has gone by he having less communication with me, tell me he needs space that he needs to figure how to work on me. But theres no more everyday texting or calling
He very distance. We spend some time together,this weekend but he hasn’t texted me at all or called..also I driving his car since my car getting fixed but he hasn’t asked for it back either. He is over me. He not the type to go out, if he not with his kids his at hos.moms house. Or with his friend drinking..
Last week he texted me that he was feeling down this couple of day he was feeling depressed and was thinking about us.
Please let know if I have lost him
Yes I have begged, plede and tried to understand why he not ready for a commitment. But he hasn’t told his family or friends we not together anymore
But the wierd thing is he introduced me as his girlfriend..please him me is my relationship with completely over.
Noelle
July 15, 2019 at 11:09 am
I LOVE you website. I tried no contact before and it worked. It was 21 days and he was angry with me when I texted him and I sent the wrong text probably. That was 2-3 years ago, now we have a daughter together and live together. He said he doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore and im heartbroken. I am in the process of moving out and I plan to do contact again this time 30-45 days and I will stuck to the appropriate text message because last time when he was upset I told him that I needed a break from the friendship.
Chris Seiter
July 15, 2019 at 3:13 pm
H Noelle…I wish you the best of luck with you NC efforts. Just make sure you follow along with my teachings which I detail in EBR PRO Relationship Bundle.
Sam
July 14, 2019 at 1:22 am
Hi! So me and my boyfriend broke up exactly a week ago. We dated for 19 months and our relationship was anything but perfect, but in the end we always did our best to stay with each other. Towards the end of our relationship (last month or so) he broke up with me twice, both times for around an hour, but both times he came back. This time, he broke up with me because I called another guy hot which was wrong I admit, but in the end what he did to me throughout the relationship was actually was worse than that (cheating, etc.) Not 5 minutes after breaking up with me, I was blocked on everything. I texted him a couple times begging and pleaded and after 2 days I was unblocked but never got a reply. 3 Days after we broke up I texted him to ask him when would be a goof time to bring his stuff back and he answered but only to tell me to leave him alone. I have been in NC for 3 days since, and I’m wondering if there’s even a chance he’ll come back and if NC will even work on him since he is so stubborn. Also, how does being UG help if I’m blocked on all social media and he has no way of seeing it? Before we started dating, he did end things at one point saying that he needed to focus on himself, and I unintentionally had no contact with him for weeks until one night he unblocked me and we began dating. I’m trying not to lose hope but I want him back so bad and I feel like the best part of me is missing without him.
Linda
July 5, 2019 at 3:02 pm
Hi Chris,
I think I made a mistake on how I started no contact. He started seeing another girl and said he sees me as a friend for now and wants me to be his friend. We tried the whole friends thing and it’s just not working for me because it hurts too much. I told him I can’t be his friend and that it’s best if we don’t contact each other. Now I’m scared if I showed too many cards in my hands. Should I have just gone cold turkey? I mean i know it’s too late now but now I’m wondering if this is going to work at all…