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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
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Bethenny
May 24, 2015 at 10:05 am
Hey Chris,
This is the best website I’ve ever seen on this topic….and I’ve visited a few in my day 😉 I will try and make this short.
I was with my boyfriend for 2 year. I broke up with him 2 months ago. We fought a lot and things just seemed to be going downhill. Right after the breakup, he was allllllll over me to get back with him. He basically said he would propose immediately (something that I’ve wanted forever) and said all the things I wanted to hear. He also started asking me out on amazing dates, doing all the right things, and making a hugeeee effort to make things right. This lasted for about a month. We hung out a lot. We had sex. He kept asking me to be his gf again but I still wanted to make sure we weren’t just jumping into a bad situation. So, after 6 weeks, I felt like things were great! I wanted to get back together but when I told him that, he said he wanted to cool things down.
WTF? He chased me harddddd for 6 weeks and now he doesn’t want me? He says that we’ll be back together some day….wtf. I feel like he wasnts to keep my close enough so I won’t move on but far enough so he can ‘see what’s out there.’ So, I am thanking of doing NC. Actually today is my first day, lol. What do you think?? Will it work on him?
Chris Seiter
June 2, 2015 at 2:13 am
Thanks Bethenny!
That’s what I am striving towards.
I think you are spot on with your suspicions. Definitely give the no contact rule a try.
WAZZZAAAAP!
April 18, 2015 at 7:01 pm
Heyya Christ, let me make it short and sweet.
First of all, kudos to you for spilling all theses manly beans everywhere and giving us a better insight on what grinds guys gears and whatnot. You’re a darling.
Now to the fun part. (Not really)
Me and my ex were together for 3+ years. We started when I was in 9th, he in 11th, and ended while I’m in 12th, and he in his second year of college, yadayada.
This guy cheated on me on and off, I cheated on and off. We were both some shitty people and had our shitty moments.
For a good year together we’ve been clear of cheating. What initiated the break up was that I found out about his cheating ways. Yup, wasn’t aware of it while it was happening, just kinda fell on me like an anvil lol.
So there I was, fucked up in the head because up until then I had this kind of innocent image him and at the same time I had been clean of cheating on him for a WHILE and was ready to “fully devoted myself and shower him with love and feelings and womanly stuff”. We’ve been broken up for two months now. Since then, being me, I was the one who initiated contact yadayadayada. Clingly crazy ex whatever. Well not crazy but just hurt and left with lots of questions that he had enough balls to answer in truth and honesty. But that was within the first couple weeks of the break up. I forgave him, I let him know I forgave him, and I put the past behind and weirdly I feel more in love with him because its like all our cards are on the table ya know.
We talked alot and he told me that he still loves me, is still in love with me and knows that he’ll regret breaking up and want me the future, but he wants to focus on himself and get an apartment and get further up in job. (Pls decode dat.)
Just YESTERDAY, I had a sort of vulnerable episode idk. Wouldn’t really say vulnerable but he willingly came over and wanted to take me to eat and just talk. Welp. We had some seriously bomb sex before and after. I wanted it, he wanted it. We both wanted it for our own reasons and it happened.
Now my issue is, the whole time since we’ve broken up I’ve wanted him and just wanted to start clean and just love eachother the way we should’ve, yadayadayada. No, I’m not more attached now that we had sex. I was fully aware that having sex with him isn’t surely going to change what he wants ya know. Like I said before, he wants to just focus on himself.
So now that you know the whole enchilada, give me some light here. I’m gonna do the 30 day NC. Do you think that’ll kind of reel him in? Do you think it’ll get him thinking and eventually HE’LL initiate contact? Whatcha thinking? Need some insight on this because I feel like sex just made it that more complicated.
Chris Seiter
April 20, 2015 at 9:13 pm
Yes I think itll get him thinking.
I think that’s an amazing idea at this point.
WAZZZAAAAP!
April 18, 2015 at 7:02 pm
Wow I wrote Christ instead of Chris. Totally not an idiot. 🙂
Chris Seiter
April 20, 2015 at 9:09 pm
Hey I like it!
It really adds to the god complex I already have :p .
jazmynne
April 16, 2015 at 11:36 pm
Hi chris, my ex boyfriend broke up with me 5 dyas ago theough chat. He is in korea for the whole summer and his reason was that there is no spark anymore and he is tired me. We’ve been 1 year and 3 months and he told his friend that he was just faking his love for me lately. I couldnt beleive it. And i havent contacted him since the day we broke up. Do you think he would still chase me?
jazmynne
April 16, 2015 at 11:44 pm
But my friends are giving me hope that he still loves me that he hust said that because he is confused wanted to move on. I really want him back , like i met his parents, ge met mine. We always hang out and before he went to korea we were still even okay. But he said he just doesnt feel it anymore because we are too comfortable with each other. He wants to be with himself. I asked why dont want to wait till you come and so we can break up personally. He said he might meet new girls. We also broke up before and i gave him the no contact rules for 11 days. But after that, i chased him and we talked and we got okay. But this te is different. I want him to be the one to chase me. Do you think i still have the chance?
Faith
April 16, 2015 at 4:10 pm
Hi Chris,
I finished 30 days NC and hadn’t contacted my ex yet when he sent me a message on day 32 saying he had been thinking about me. I waited to reply and we had a good conversation… good texting ratio, he wrote much more than I did, he responded right away etc. I waited a few days and then sent him a message. I kept it positive and he was positive replying although slightly less so this time.. a bit more neutral .
My problem is I always reply pretty much right away which believe me I KNOW I’m not supposed to do and I’m working on that… but since I didn’t send the first message after no contact he did, how can I regain a position of power? obviously leave on a high note, end the conversation first, and wait longer to reply…
is there anything else I can do?
When I make slight mistakes how can I turn the situation back around to my advantage?
Thank you!!
Maria
April 15, 2015 at 5:18 pm
Hi Chris,
I have been on your site a lot recently. My boyfriend of almost 4 years broke up with me about two months again. We are both in school and only saw each other on the weekends, but we were very close and very close with each other’s families too. We talked about marriage, kids, etc., and always talked about how we’d be together forever. We didn’t fight much and always had fun together. Two month ago he asked me for a break then came back the next day and said he was crazy, missed me after just one day, and that he loved me. Then a week later he ended things. He said he needed time to figure things out and he doesn’t know the future. I was in total shock. He was keeping contact with me and I was just trying to get him to really explain what happened. We had contact on and off for about a month and then it slowly tapered off. Right after ending all contact, I logged onto his facebook (which I know was wrong) but I was just curious as to what could have caused the sudden change. Turns out he hooked up with someone. I don’t really know if he cheated or not, but either way he never completely ended things with me, he kinda left me hanging saying maybe one day we’d be together again if things were meant to be. I confronted him about the girl and he was just rude to me. He tried to flip everything around on me for logging into his facebook. I apologized for that, but I told him I was glad I found out because otherwise I would have let him keep stringing me along. Anyways, it’s been a full week of NC and I’m doing fine. I don’t know if I’d ever be able to get back together with him, but I just want him to realize that what he did was wrong and give me the apology I deserve. I know you don’t know him, but the way he is acting is completely out of character for him. He was the type of person that would have done anything for me and would have never treated me this way. I am worried about him and what has influenced this sudden change. I’m just curious if there is any way to make him feel remorse and regret for ruining a relationship with the girl he planned on marrying.
Sarah
April 6, 2015 at 11:13 pm
Hello Chris. I’ve been following you for weeks now. 30 days of no contact. Check. Thought-provoking texting, check. We met up when I brought his son an Easter basket, and our convo was light and positive. He mentioned that I looked good and happy (15 lbs down and really making a better “me”) . After the goodbye hug, one thing led ti another, we had sex. Anyway, he did tell me before he was talking to someone from work. And when I asked him his plans for Easter he said his friends d was coming over with her daughter (to play with his son). I bought tickets to an Nba game for our anniversary (pre-breakup) and he agreed to still go with me. Can you give me some pointers to keep positive about our meeting. He was texting me during NC, generally asking how I was doing. We were together 5 years. Bought a house together – lot of history.
cm
March 12, 2015 at 12:32 am
After the first contact I’ve been getting relatively-positive responses and I’m now trying to get a convo going but it takes my ex 2 ish days just to respond to my text.. They’re pretty good texts I think and when he finally does respond, they’re pretty engaged and he sounds excited (even after I “told a story”) but it’s making it really difficult for me to get talking and then cut it off — or even move onto the next texting phase! (Which I think could be more effective in making him want to see my texts..) So it’s just been light and funny so far, B/c every… single… text… takes him a few days. (I can see when he reads it on WhatsApp, he usually doesn’t even read it for a few days, but then responds right after he’s read it. Almost like he has to be in the right mood to read my texts or something?)
In this case, how long should I wait to respond to his texts? Usually you say to wait 2 days after cutting off a convo but since one reply takes that long… should I wait a few days after his last response too? I don’t want to seem desperate of course but I also don’t want to keep up reenforcing these dragged out convos. I feel like I have little control right now about its progression forward..
admin
March 13, 2015 at 7:55 pm
Yes I think that is a good idea of waiting a few days after his latest response.
Samantha
March 11, 2015 at 3:32 am
Hi there!
I read your article and loved the loads if info you have in it. My situation is a bit different. My ex and I were together for 3+ years, and he cheated on me 2 years in. I took him back too soon and we were working on things untill 5 months later he says he no longer loves me the way he used to. I had gained about 15-20 lbs during this time and I believe like you said his attraction to me and my looks at this time didn’t help him wanting to try to work things out. We argued alot, i threw things, he called me names and I believe it was he harboring a bad attitude towards him without letting myself be truly angry at him for cheating before I got back together with him. He started talking to another girl in his class at school which i heard about through a friend of a friend and they started “talking” the month we broke up and were officially together 6 months later. This whole time between the “break up” in may – September we were still seeing each other a few times a week and having sex occasionally. I thought we were working on getting back together but I found out he was making out and sleeping with that girl in september and things died. Now 10 months after the break up I want him back. I love him so much it’s ridiculous. Most recently his new girlfriend has found out he has herpes type 2. He gave it to me during our relationship and she has demanded that he get tested and show her proof of his results. The only reason I know this is that he has been coming to hang out and smoke weed with me at times (maybe 4 or 5 times in 2 months). I do text him to ask about my/his dog but that is really the extend of what we talk about or have talked about since september. The only time I was seeing him was when he would bring the dog to visit and smoke. Anyways he has been extremely stressed with having to tell his new gf because first he never told her, AND there is an impending legal case over his head for non disclosure of an incurable std. He has been texting me, calling me, and crying to me about this and he even admitted to me that he loves her. I decided that day the no contact rule had to be put in place. No dogs, no texts, no calls nothing. My question is, is it too late for NC? Does he even care anymore? What she accepts him and his std? Wouldn’t that just make them closer? The last time he came to smoke when he was crying and what not he saw me. I’ve lost about 15-20 lbs and I gotta say I look pretty damn good. He commented on my waist being extra small and even made a comment about a sex tape we mad a long time ago saying he watched it. I just don’t know if my change can compete with “new love”. I confessed to him that I actually do understand logically why he did some of the things he did and removed all emotion from it. I didn’t cry or anything even though he did. He’s said a couple times recently that “I was the best thing that ever happened to him before and after” (whatever that means). I think he’s just emotionally distraught over this whole case and wants support from someone who already knows about his std. Is he using me then as a fallback if this girl doesn’t accept him? I saw his car at her apt and he took the dog with him so I’m assuming he’s going to spend the night…idk. I’m going crazy here!! Clearly–I’m stalking again. Help!
admin
March 13, 2015 at 7:08 pm
Well first piece of advice STOP STALKING!!!
Samantha
March 15, 2015 at 5:37 am
Ok i can do that. Is there a second or third piece?
Samantha
March 11, 2015 at 3:36 am
I’d like to add that the case isn’t from the girl he is dating. It’s from some fling from the past.
Samantha
March 11, 2015 at 3:45 am
Last thing, in the break up, I broke up with him because he was was trying to spare my feelings and not have to say he didn’t love me the same way (this is during the time the new girl showed up). I thought we broke up in september, he says may. I guess he is technically right but we acted like a couple that was trying to work it out till I knew he was romantically involved in september. I even paid for a cruise for us to go on for his and my birthday in august. We had a blast, but after that he finally told me he didnt love me the same. Then I was done.
Help Me
March 10, 2015 at 9:41 pm
Good Evening fine advice giver,
I am on day 17 of the NC rule. I am on the younger scale and I have not found it very hard to implement this rule. I have been reading articles after articles after articles on all things to do with relationships. I can probably perfectly recite the first page of articles that come on a google search for “How to Let Go of an Ex” or “How to Make Your Ex Miss You.” I have been failing miserably. Long story short of what is happening between my “ex” and I: We started seeing each other around August, and I was totally not into him; I was basically only with him because I was bored. He chased me, texted me everyday, snapped me everyday, and tried to hang out with me as much as possible. It was the good ole days, but I didn’t know they were the good ole days until now :(. Well one night I saw him getting a little too close to one of my friends (I was very intoxicated) and I flipped out. I was crying and yelling and making an absolute scene. Point is, I found my feelings for him through jealousy. So after that night he ended things with me because as you said in this article, I showed emotion (and lots of it). We didn’t speak for about a month and we rekindled things on Halloween. So many details! I am sorry, I just want you to really know everything to help me out. So after Halloween things were horrible. He never really texted me, never snapped me (except for nudes.. I never gave in to those), and never hung out with me. All the signs pointed him to using me, and I confronted him about it and he promised he wasn’t and told me he really cared for me and I was just being “over-emotional.” I ended things on Christmas Day (horrible I know, but I was going insane). Another NC was enforced and finally he tried talking to me again and promised he would do anything to prove he isn’t using me and he doesn’t want to stop talking. So I gave in. We were ok for a month or so, he texted me a little more, snapped me a little more, and made a few efforts to hangout. Then one weekend his parents were out of town and he had a party, and didn’t invite me. (Sounds like middle school drama, but it was a big deal). However, I went to the party anyways, saw him try to get with one of my close friends, and then he bitched me out in front of everyone. Later he apologized and said he was stressed and did that to everyone. My emotional stability was going down the drain quicker than humanly possible. So I tried a “NEW” approach and tried to tell him my feelings, rather than yelling at him about everything he did wrong. Total and complete embarrassment, he didn’t reply to me at all and made me feel stupid about even bringing it up. Finally around 17 days ago I had it and I told him I wanted things to be ended once and for all. He laughed and said he didn’t know why I was even saying anything to him because “I always come back.” (cough I always let him come back). I thought the best way to get closure from his laughter was to get him to confirm my inner thoughts that I was being used. So after a day of fighting and me sending long messages with no responses, I told him if he every respected me he would admit to using me for sex. Finally after being a little bitch, he admitted it. Basically the past 4 months of my life have been a lie, it did not bring me closure. Now he is “with/in a thing” with the girl( my old friend) from his party, and seeing him around with her everyday is tormenting me. Ok now that you know the very basic (as basic as I can make it) details, I need advice. After all that I’ve been through, and after his confession… I still want him back. I even know how stupid I am for saying that, but as he was losing feelings I was gaining. How the hell do I get rid of these feelings?!? Because I know I can get him back with a few tricks, but I can’t get him back to liking me. Or can I? Please help me. I have been such a mess lately and I just want this to end. I am miserable, how do I stop myself from being miserable from this? Any tips, advice, good drugs (joking)… etc.
Thank you,
Very miserable and hopeful on happiness young woman
admin
March 13, 2015 at 6:53 pm
Good evening “HELP ME”
Hahaha love it.
Ok, I like your attitude. You are similar to me in that you are trying to make a dark situation light with your humor.
Umm.. my first piece of advice is how have you improved from the breakup?
Have you improved at all?
Help Me
March 19, 2015 at 1:03 am
I have tried to improve, I made a list of 30 realistic things to do (with no exact deadline).. things like go fishing, take ridiculous photos of myself, take yoga classes, etc. Everything I can possibly do without involving any kind of relationship element. I have tried branching out to other guys, but I just find myself being so sad it’s not him. I feel like a complete idiot because all he does is use me and treat me horribly. Even when I reflect on our relationship I only see the bad, I really can’t remember one positive thing (that was actually real). It’s super hard to get over this. I can’t focus on other things. I have tried doing things I have done in the past to get over guys. I have tried hooking up with other people, watching my favorite shows, reading, focusing on school. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING is helping me forget. The worst part is I have to see him everyday treating this other girl EXACTLY how I wanted to be treated. It hurts because I knew he had the ability to be like that and he always said he didn’t, but I am literally witnessing him being there for her in all the ways he wasn’t for me. I am 4 days away from completing the NC rule. Not to sound like a drama queen, but it feels like I am drowning with no land in sight. Normally after this amount of time I am a lot better than I am now. I have tried to view this in every way possible. I have tried all the tricks up my sleeve and added some new ones, but none of it is working. It all honestly scares me, I hate being “attached.” I’d rather be in a room filled with rattlesnakes than be attached to someone. It sucks having my happiness depend on someone else. I just really don’t know how to become detached. Maybe the lesson from this horrible, callous boy has yet to be learned. Am I missing some kind of enlightening point that will sprout an epiphany to guide me to my wise old age of 102?
As always,
“HELP ME”
Help Me
March 19, 2015 at 1:19 am
I know, I know I ended my soliloquy but, I know he will be back after the new girl is gone. But I don’t want to be around for him at his leisure. I know I’ve been droning on and on about how I kinda want him back (fine I really want him back). But I want to have him back under the right pretenses. How do I make him really work for it? I can tell you exactly how it will happen, it will end between him and this girl, and he won’t talk to me until we are in person together (at a party or with mutual friends), and then he will sweetly talk to me and convince me that he is so sincere and he never really did use me. I know deep in my mind he is full of shit -excuse my crude language but it’s necessary- but because I like him so much, I am kind of blinded. I will even tell him I need time, but I always, always give in. He knows all the right things to say to me and he knows that I have intense feelings for him and he uses that to his advantage. I know all of this, and I can tell you all of this, but when I am in that moment, it’s like all of my rational thoughts are switched off and my judgement is blinded. How do I let him know that it’s not okay, and I don’t believe him, and how do I get him to actually act out the things he is promising me? (Promises from the past: I promise I will hang out with you more, I promise no more 1- am booty calls, I promise I will actually put in an effort, I promise I care). How do I truly make him care? He really did care for me at one point… This is all just so sad. Tear.
Hopefully I won’t add another 200- word speech,
Your favorite “help me”
PS please also give me advice for the other really long and annoying essay. I am sorry to be so demanding, but I just need help getting through this rough time. You know a lot more and give awesome advice and I need as much as I can possibly get. I know you’re busy, but I would appreciate it beyond belief.
Brittany
March 5, 2015 at 2:52 am
Hello Chris,
Long story short, my boyfriend had no family, so my family welcomed him into our home. He lived at my house for 2 years, within the two years I became so in love with him. He eventually went to college in a firefighting program, met lots of friends, and everything from there changed. His ego got really big. He began talking to girls behind my back (innocently but sneakily). He tried apologizing; however, I did not accept it. On my birthday I sporadically kicked him out of my house. From there, he says he does not want a relationship, and he wants to “focus on himself” He lives with one of his buddies and looks like he’s having so much fun with his friends, and it seems like he doesn’t feel any pain. We hung out twice, but I realized I am just harming myself.
I started the NC rule. I am on day 4.
Do you think that he will end up missing me?
admin
March 7, 2015 at 5:33 pm
Too early to tell but I definitely think this is your best chance of making it happen.
Sarah
March 4, 2015 at 9:24 pm
Hi,
My boyfriend and I have been dating on an off for 7 months. Our relationship in the beginning was so good, but a lot happened in a short amount of time that put some strain on our relationship. But what I am confused about is when he broke up with me about a week before valentines day, the weekend of valentines he told me he realized needed me in his life and he was attached to me, wanted to just take a break and still would like to be with me. He even told me he thought he was falling in love with me. Well two weeks after that we got into an argument and he completely cut me off, broke up with me and now he says I’m an awesome girl but just not for him. I am embarrassed to admit I am a text gnat and I got super emotional during this breakup, I am wondering if the NC rule would even help at this point? I have cut down A LOT and do not text him as of yet bc I do want to get him back. He has told me he still has feelings for me and I do for him also, and I do want to be with him. I just don’t know if he will realize how dumb our breakup was if I don’t contact him because I was such a text gnat during the breakup that he’s completely fed up and it actually is done for good.
admin
March 7, 2015 at 5:25 pm
I think it would help!
It definitely would in my opinion.
Liz
February 27, 2015 at 4:33 am
Hello Chris,
I used to come to this website frequently about half a year ago but stopped when I gave up trying with my ex. The thing is, he’s still in my life. We’re friends, if exes could ever be such a thing. I’m about to graduate with my Bachelors degree and so is he. Now I’m considering grad school. Basically, even though it’s been 1 year and 3 months since the breakup, I can’t forget him. We text each other pretty frequently, we meet up and eat or hang out sometimes. Just recently he’s been in the habit of coming by my house to give me gifts like autographed cds and shirts from concerts or places he’s been. He likes to keep me in the loop of things. He even went to therapy with me when my therapist asked if he’d come with me since it means so much to me that he’s still in my life. We even took a weekend trip to Houston from where we live in Austin and spent the night at a hotel. There’s nothing physical between us though. But the way he tries so much to please me, make me happy and buys me gifts and tries for me…it confuses me. Why would he do these things but have no interest in getting together with me again? I truly have been working on my issues like co-dependency, jealousy, clinginess, the depression. These were the issues that caused the breakup between us. Just the other night we went out for drinks and we both opened up and talked about those issues and we were understanding each other and it was just amazing. We both ended the night extremely happy and more open with one another. There was even a night when he came over and accidentally fell asleep and we ended up spending the whole night and the next day together as well. He also had gotten sick and I brought him medicine and soup and stayed with him until he felt better.
I just don’t understand what it all means. Does he genuinely just enjoy being friends? It’s going to hurt when he finds someone and stops talking to me. He’s the kind of guy that plans everything in his life and everything has to have a purpose and he doesn’t hold onto memories, the past or anything sentimental. So why is he like this with me? And what do I do to re-ignite that love he used to have for me?
Any advice would help. I’m still in love with him. And him doing those things doesn’t help at all..
-Elizabeth
Liz
February 27, 2015 at 4:41 am
I forgot to mention that the night he slept over was Valentine’s Day. He had text me that day saying he missed the steaks I used to make and wanted me to come over so we could have a steak dinner but it was my best friend’s birthday so I said I couldn’t. And that night when he came over after I celebrated with my best friend, we watched videos for hours and his friends called him to go out but he told them he wanted to just stay in and sleep, but really he was just relaxing with me. And the few times we’ve had a disagreement we can discuss it and smooth it over and listen to each other when in the past it would’ve caused a needless fight. I feel like we are making great improvements, the only problem is that he doesn’t want to be with me…
anki
February 17, 2015 at 1:22 pm
pls reply
admin
February 18, 2015 at 9:14 pm
I am replying!
Now how can I help?
Anki
February 18, 2015 at 9:42 pm
i asked u a question which is just below three comments.. with same name anki.
u replied regarding NC and i asked one more thing regarding FB reqiest..
can u pls reply once more.
i m really sorry to bug u so much
admin
February 20, 2015 at 6:12 pm
I can’t find it as a refrence point. Mind copying and pasting it for me?
Anki
February 20, 2015 at 10:16 pm
Being a guy yourself ..can u amswer with ur experience that if a guy loves a girl then can he leave that girl without any proper promise or anything just saying he wants to focus on his career and he wud call u after a year… lets talk evrythng then. till then i cant answer anything.i need time.
i mean chris ONE WHOLE YEAR??? isnt he afraid we might separate…doesnt he care what i want? i really want to know what hoes inside a guy:s head coz he wont talk to me
admin
February 21, 2015 at 12:07 am
It depends on the situation entirely…
But that sounds very strange for him to use the one year comment….
Anki
February 21, 2015 at 10:58 am
yes…
if he had promised me that we will b together after that no matter what ..then i wud have waited fr him fr even 5 years.. but ryt nw i m afraid. what if he changes his mind after a year? i cant keep on waiting fr me..
what do u think shud i do? shud i ask him to either promise me or break up with me no strings attached? or shud i wait..
though i have started Nc.. 4th day today
anki
February 23, 2015 at 8:01 pm
Pls tell
ShuD I wait fr a year or
Shud I wait fr 30 day nc or
ShUD I clearly aSk him to either pomise me smthng or break up if that’s what he wants. He is 24 its hIs first relation
Pls tell me what to do
Hannah
February 16, 2015 at 1:58 pm
Refering to the ‘patience IN contact’, I wanted to ask a specific question. Do I need to reply to his texts late? Even when we were dating, i always gave a prompt reply. So it’s not something I’m doing on purpose. But does it make a difference to reply late? Does it kind of work like a cliffhanger?
jiya frm india
February 14, 2015 at 8:58 pm
Dear admin m really eager to know what 2 do when my ex blocked me up?will NC period wrk out in this case
admin
February 16, 2015 at 11:26 pm
I believe it will!
Anki
February 11, 2015 at 9:47 pm
hi chris..
i really need ur help. i m gng out of my senses.
There is ths guy who liked me a lot.and showed it many times. slowly we started chatting and he said many times that he loves me alot. i told him i like him but i cant say i love u bcz it wud b too soon. i fall hard wen i fall in love spo i want to take things slow. but we texted a lot, he flirted wode all the time and eventually i told him i love u. fr a few days it went great but then his hectic job started. ( when all this ws happening he was on a break frm his job) and all this took around 20 days.
aftr that he still chatted fr 2-3 days till 4am and i ised to bef him to.sleep.as he had to wake up at six. he used to ask me to study all the time fr a job exam so one day we had a fight. i asked him that we shud take a month break and i qill study fr my exam bcz i get distracted wen i talk to him.
he didnt agree and he said we will separate if we tk a month break n he cant tal let me go.co
i didnt want to agree but eventually i did. but very next day he said he cant talk
admin
February 16, 2015 at 9:54 pm
Have you used NC?
anki
February 17, 2015 at 9:50 am
yesterday only i started NC after becoming a text gnat for a few days..
just one question though.. when he was still a friend before our family trip.. he for months was searching me on facebook and i had hidden myself.
so he used to call me up and asked me to add him on facebook. i never liked him that tym so i used to say ok i will add u.
one month later i m madly in love with him.
can i send him facebook friend request to him now?
should i also send fb msg that i m sending the request only because he asked me too.
he has blocked me on phone and whatsapp so fb seems lyk only contact to me..
will sending request decrease my chances of getting him back?
Anki
February 11, 2015 at 10:00 pm
sorry i couldnt complete the whole thing.
so he said he cant talk n he is busy.and tired. i obviously complained bcz i wanted to talk.he said we will talk in day time wen i m at job and i want to study at night fr anothr better job’s exam.
i agreed. the next day he said he is busy will talk at nyt.at nyt he slept without talking.
i was pissed with all ths n left a few rude angry msgs. he said the next day that he is busy all the time and cant talk.to much. we shud talk 2-3 times a week.that time i agreef but later got frustated.
the harder i tried, clung on and acted nerdy.the more he went away.
now yesteeday i asked clearly if he loved me. he said yes he loves me but he wants to b rich and successful fr that he needs a year break frme to make his career.aftr that he will calle and make evrythng correct. but he camt stay in contact fr a year. i tried calling texting etv.
he doesnt pick call, dsnt reply and even blocked me on watsapp.
all this happened within last.3-4 days. yesterday aftr his ride msg i said sorry and didnt contact.but thn today i sent him a cute friendly msg which he dint reply and as a result i ended up sending him 5 more. i called 4 times too bt no reply.
i just want toknow frm u that y did he go frm chasing me, being head ovr heels fre, to saying ill chase u if take ome month break cant let u get away to saying we will talk less it distracts me as i think abt it all the time to saying stay away frm me fr 1 year.wen i ask him to atleast talk smtimes lyk frnds he even denoes that
Anki
February 11, 2015 at 10:07 pm
he even says no to.that. now he is ignoring me completely. i m shocled. he used to say he loves me and want to get married. wen yestrday i asked if thats still true…he said he loves me and if career goes like he planned thn he will marry me too but cnt promise anything. he will contact me aftr a year. i msgd him today i cant wait fr a year. pls dnt do ths..
does he love me? shud i wait fr a year.. coz i love him.
can a person who lpves u stay without talking to u fr a year?
i want to know if he was serious or plating games. he says career n money most imp.which will keep us happy.now he says i cant explain same thng again so dnt contact.what do i do?
if he contacts me ths time i wont b clingy and i wont diatract him.
i want to add he is 24 and ths was his and mine first relation.he is a family friend.
Anna
February 8, 2015 at 5:21 am
To be honest I found this when googling a diff situation. But the info is very universal and I’m so glad I checked it out!
admin
February 9, 2015 at 4:16 pm
I am too!
My website isn’t possible without people like you so I really appreciate it!
haley
February 1, 2015 at 6:01 am
How do you apply the no contact rule if you are pregnant with his child and 4 weeks away from your due date?He has also moved in with another woman since i was 13 weeks along.He now states he wants to move out be alone and single because he hasn’t the emotional capacity to uphold a relationship.He suffers from ptsd amongst many other emotional instabilities.Feel kinda silly writing this but i need some guidance.thank you kindly
haley
February 3, 2015 at 5:59 pm
Wonderful.i have alot of reading ahead of me.I sincerely appreciate you taking the time and thought into writing this for women like myself.The fact that you responded is that much more admirable.I won’t go into large detail on my situation because I already have the answers with the link you provided,and it’s up to me to inculcate them.What I will tell you is I have begun the hard journey of the modified NC rule.I’m am determined to keep strict to it this time because I have admittedly failed before.There are two reasons why I am commiting. #1 the ovious wanting him back,but the 2nd is that I want to be able to give back to you in whatever way I can by wholeheartedly giving my best and commending you in the near future on your great efforts put into this program.I well know it is no guarantee that we will be back together but at the very least I will come out a stronger individual and for that you deserve commendation.
my truest sincerity,
Haley
admin
February 2, 2015 at 1:58 pm
Good question!
I actually wrote an article on this,
https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-boyfriend-back-if-you-are-pregnant/
ana
January 29, 2015 at 8:02 am
i ve been with my boyfriend 2 years a d 3 months ..and he told me to break up that he feels no love ..cares about me a lot but is not enough in a relationship …he still search me..i ve moved out from the apartment..but he said that is better to be friends…is a possibility to win him back..if he feels no love?
ana
February 4, 2015 at 2:00 pm
update…still hang s out with me…feels good ..but no fisical contact..he calls me everyday to see what i m doing
Amy
January 25, 2015 at 1:13 am
HUGE question. I hope you respond. My ex broke up with me because I had been taking him for granted. Not making him or our relationship a priority. Just started NC period today. His birthday is in 1.5 weeks….. do I continue NC or send a simple message/gift? He will be out of town for 90 days as well……..
admin
January 26, 2015 at 3:34 pm
Define taking him for granted.?
Amy
January 25, 2015 at 1:14 am
We’ve been dating for 2.5 years. Last year we were talking about marriage.