How To Get Your Ex Back After A Fight- Ex Boyfriend Recovery

311 thoughts on “Get Your Boyfriend Back After A Fight”

unknown

July 12, 2015 at 5:42 am

hi, me and my bf or (my ex since i broke up with him because i wanted to get his attention) we always get into fights at least once in a week, but we always managed to get back together and talk it out afterward. everytime when we get into fights, i tend to ignore him or yell at him. we got into all those fights because he disappointed me and lied to me. one thing i hate about him is that he always gotta tell everybody about us.. and then his friends would tell him to give up on me or they wouldve msg me and tell me to apologize to him when it wasnt even my fault at all. I nvr thought about giving up on him but recently we got into more fights and I keep on bringing up about “breaking up”. i know he wouldnt let me go because i said breaking up 2 times and every single time he wouldnt let me go and said he wouldnt move on if we break up and that he cant lose me. Then one day after our arguments I told him sorry that i think it would be better to let him go so we both have to suffer and all he said was “K”. At first, i thought it was his friends who typed that because i know him, i know he wouldn’t do that to me, but he did! he lets me go… I was so heart broken and i cried the whole night. I was texting my friends and talked to them on the phone about it and they all told me to let him go and i didn’t want to. so i called him and asked him if i can get my stuff back from his car (so i can see if it was really him who typed “K” because if it wasnt he would asked me why) but instead he didnt, he said “i will just give it back to u right now” that moment my heart died.. i didnt even know what to do anymore that time. I ran out my house and walked about my neighborhood in the middle of the night. Then i called him again. we talked on the phone and he sounded so different. he sounded like hes a different person like i dont even know him at all. he was yelling at me over the phone and saying that I was the one who wanted to break up so i cant blame it on him.. the only reason that i said that was because i wanted his attention.. i didnt want to lose him.. we talked on the phone about 30 mins and then i couldnt deal with it anymore so i told him that he doesnt care about me anymore and ima go kill myself and then i hung up. he nvr called me back. but then i got a text from him later saying that “do you want to meet up? if not, then we’re over. i gotta bring my friend home” and then he called me and asked if i want to meet up and talk so i was like yea. i asked him if he was gonna come alone and he said his friends will be in the car and he will talk to me alone. i was really looking forward to it. but then when we met up, his friend made a “line” that i couldnt cross. if i cross it, they will just leave. and then his friend went back into the car so we started talking. he brought up everything from the past.. our fights and how i hurt him by ignoring him and how he tried to work things out with me, but i wouldnt want to. he knows the reason why i do that, it is because i needed time to cool off. he said he has been holding it all in and said he gave me a lot of chances. if he told me before, i wouldve changed and work things out with him. and then his friends got off the car and surrounded me. i felt like i was ganged up by them. they were all backing him up and saying i dont respect him and care for him. all this time, ive been sacrificing a lot of things for him. he knows that. i was willing to do anything for him. I always make food for him, listen to him when hes sad or mad, care for him, and etc. And then he said I was like his mom… THAT BROKE MY HEART, it was like a bullet just went through my heart.. i just cant believe he said that.. before he would always say that hes lucky that im his gf because im so caring and loving like nobody else is like that besides his parents.. the reason he said im like his mom is because i yelled at him after i know he got into a car accident.. but before i yelled at him the first thing i asked him was if he was okay . he said yea and then i yelled at him for getting into a car accident. like i told him not to stay out that late and he promised me he wouldnt because i worry about him. i know this might sound controlling but i did this was because i love and care for him. he said i didnt care about him and i just yelle at him when i found out he got into a car accident. i was really worried.. the moment he told me he got into a car accident, i felt like my heart was aching.. because i know i cant lose him. we had so much memories together and we even talked about moving out and going to college together. and then he said he was mad because i ruined his plans about celebrating out anniversary. in the beginning i was fine with him bringing me to places and treat me but after he told me we just got fired. we lost a job.. that moment i felt really bad and i didnt want him to take me out anymore.. it is because he owes that guy $400 after the car accident, he didnt want his insurance to go up so he rather to pay that guy cash within a month.. i know he barely have any money left and plus his friends bday was coming up the next day so i know he will spend money on his friend. so i told him if he can just come out and we can go walk around, we dont need to go to fancy restaurants in order to celebrate, we can still hang out and be together. he didnt want to and said i ruined his mood and he got me waited for him for the whole day like 7 hrs. i got mad because i made him a surprise and baked him a cake.. i cussed him out out of anger and told him to shut up. he stopped talking to me right after because he knows i was pissed off. so this was basically what he talked about when we met up. He was like a different person, the way he told me all that was with confidence. i asked him if i can get another chance and he said no not now because he needs to get his life back together since he has lost so many time being with me before.. i was so heart broken.. that moment i couldnt even talk anymore.. all i just wanted was to kill myself.. i wanted to just run out to the streets and have a car run over me. but he keeps on telling me not to do stupid things and then he asked if i want him to walk me home and i said yes. i tried to hold on to his hand but he backed up and walked away from me. i begged him for another chance and he just keeps on rejecting me. i was so heart broken.. and then when we were outside my house, i was gonna leave but he opened one of his arm and asked for a hug. i hugged him and he didnt even hug me at all.. and then i went home. right now im still trying to talk to him and he said hes thinking about giving me another chance.. he just needs time.. i understand he has been holding it all in and he couldnt let it out really hurts him so i cant get mad at him for doing what he did to me that night with his friends..
katey

June 3, 2015 at 2:37 pm

Hi Chris
So me and my boyfriend has been together for 7years.we have a little daughter together.our fight and break up came after i asked him about an ex girlfriend he was friends with on facebook (well this girl basically dragged his name through the mud by saying she was pregnant with his child,,paternity tests were taken and it turned out that the child wasnt his after all).when i asked him about why he was friends with her on facebook he basically told me that he invited her and if i have a problem with it.thereafter everything just went downhill. i asked if they were seeing each other again and he said no but i kept getting calls from this girls friend saying that him and her are trying to work things out but when he chats to me he says otherwise and says he misses me and still loves me but he doesnt want a relationship with me.i still love him very dearly..my child has been an emotional reck ever since the break up.we had a huge fight on friday and he told me i irritate him and make him sick to which i responded that i dont need him in my life(which was actually a lie). i cant deal with my child beind moody and crying for everything.i really want him back in my life and love him very much.can you help me please? i really want to build a family with him and my child.i want us to be happy…when i send him messages he replies with one word answers.my child also miss him alot..please help
KJOY

April 11, 2015 at 2:00 am

Hi Chris,

My boyfriend broke up w me this morning via email. I am devastated. A little bit of background is we were together for almost a year and had been friends about 2 years before that… during that time my now ex fought to be with me and i constantly rejected him due to religious differences; however, round a year ago I confessed my true feelings for him and we started dating.
When I was not accepting him as my boyfriend but was still kissing him around a year ago, he began to pull away. I, someone who struggles with anxiety, started blowing up his phone hard core. Then a terrible blowing up/ ignoring cycle was started. We had broken up in October for a few weeks and the break up was horrible. He had made it seemed final and had said we weren’t working and then a few days later threatened the cops on me if I kept texting him! Then we got back together early November and had been doing much better November-February. Then my mental health was getting worse and he started a new job and also his gma died the beginning of March. Towards the middle of February the ignoring/ blow up cycle occurred for 1 week. I guess he was upset thinking I wanted to control the relationship. Then we never really got back to where we were and recently he had ignored me for 11 days and I became frantic and yesterday realized his cell wasn’t accepting calls so I left a message on his work voicemail… this morning I emailed him at work telling him to check his personal email… well I got the following…

1. my phone went off because I had to pay my phone bill or my student loan and chose student loan
2. I had not been in the office until today
3. I no longer want to be with you because you go crazy all the time
4. I hope we can remain friends but that would not be until the distant future
5. I would appreciate it if you no longer used my means of employment to contact me

Thank you and sorry for it ending over an email but I can no longer put up with this.
Have a good day and hopefully we will continue to be friends at a later time.

**************
Then I replied asking to speak in person… and he said

I read it already.

I rather not meet and just stop here. I know that I had previously told you that I would not just stop talking to you but I am giving you reasons to why we will no longer be together as well as a possibility of us speaking again in the future. Sorry, I will be logging off my personal email now.

Have a good one.

***********

i then proceeded to send like 60+ emails and still wish to send more.
I feel like he does not care a thing about me. How could he just do that via email… also the stuff about being friends??? He is not friends with any of his exes and that’s why I sent tons of emails asking what he really meant and if he really felt. Last time he turned out having only wanted a break so we could work on ourselves but did not communicate that… is that what he *really* wants this time or is it final and completely over?? Please please please help!!!!

kjoy (zuzu)

April 16, 2015 at 10:18 pm

Ahhh and i’m on day 5 of nc and nothing. I feel completely hopeless since he had not talked to me for a bit then his phone was off and he didn’t tell me and then I emailed his work and he broke up..sure he was mad bc like 2.5 weeks ago I blew up his phone but still

Please help me!
zuzu

April 13, 2015 at 9:06 pm

Please get back to me asap! Freaking on wondering if this is it.. my friends are saying his email seemed serious 🙁 the last time we broke up i did NC 21 days and then on his bday we got back together and i later found out he only wanted a break (although he didn’t phrase it like that at all!!) But last time he may have seemed even angrier and even threatened the cops on me for sending so many messages and he has not done that this time. Does he no longer care about me???? I know email is easy to mask emotion and also he still seemed upset but he had been stonewalling for 11 days after I sent 50 texts one day! (and a week before that he had stonewalled 8 days after I sent like 20 texts so I went to his work w friends and he could not take his eyes off and me and looked at his phone to see if I had texted (he works as security at a restaurant/bar)) Please give me some advice. I’m convinced we are meant to be. He is the love of my life. I kind of wish I could be your case study girl now lol but I’m too late! We were friends for 2 years then dated for almost one but I was so anxious and then he would shut down when I blew up. Ahhhhhhh What should I do!? Do I hve a chance?? My last email was 2 days ago and I have been quiet since but the first day I replied with 50 emails…blahhhhh Also I am working on my mental health (anxiety, depression, eating disorder) and he knows that. He also has anxiety ptsd and some anger issues (he would shut down and separate himself from situation bc that’s how he knew how to not get angrier i guess idk or like act on it? idk ) 🙁

DZ

April 4, 2015 at 10:31 am

Hi,

My boyfriend and I are in a LDR. The last weeks we start fighting about stupid things. We didn’t talked for a couple of days and everything was ok after it. But again i did start a fight and now he was really pissed. I told him that I needed time for myself to think and he said he needed also and that I loves me so much. A couple days later I found out he blocked me on Facebook. So I asked why he did this. He only answered: because. So I said: You dont want to be with me anymore. And he said no. So I said: You want to end it? And he said: No you decided, I only agreed. I was so confused, so i told him that, but i didn’t got any response. A few days later I ask him if you could talk and he said why. So i said that i wanted to know how he thinks about us and he said: what do you think. I said I didn’t know. Again i didn’t got an answer. So they next day i said to him that i thought he also didn’t know so that we should continue with taking time for ourself and that we will see further when I am in his city (I have found a job there) but he said NO. I said: What do you want then? And he said: nothing. I asked him to be clear. If he means he want to break up with me or he just don’t want to talk? He said: leave me alone. So I said: I understand. Im sorry. Good night. And he said also good night.

I said I understand, but actually i dont understand. I think he just need some time. But when I asked him he said No. I dont know if this means he wants to break up with me and what to do?

I already left him alone for 4 days now. Should I continue with this?

In one week is his birthday. Can I write him a birthday message?
Nan

March 6, 2015 at 4:35 am

Your posts are a very helpful wake up call! Does your advice change if we fought AFTER the break up? I initiated the break up but it was mutual, no crazy emotions, pretty amicable. We were only dating 6 months and we had been drifting apart (fought 3 times last 2 weeks of dating so it could have led to us drifting apart) although I regretted breaking up too soon because I did want to make it work. Rather than doing no contact, I messaged him a couple days later and boy was I insecure! I was very accusatory and jealous. We got into a big fight and we both said really crazy, hurtful things. In the end I had said sorry for hurting him and said I’d work on my anger/trust issues and wished him well. The next day I started no contact. You had said when a person breaks up over one fight, he/she has a good chance of getting their ex back. But what if you had some fights before the break up and then a big ass fight right after the break up? Are chances gone/extremely slim now? I also read your post, “When Should You Stop Trying To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back?”…Thank you!

admin

March 7, 2015 at 5:47 pm

Depends on how bad it got after the breakup here.

How bad are we talking?
Nan

March 7, 2015 at 9:35 pm

Hi Chris. 2 days after ending it I accused him of cheating, lashed out on text and email. We fought on text for hours and said that we never wanted to see each other again. He said, “I’m glad you showed me your true colors, we are never going to work out.” And I reciprocated with the same. In the end, I apologized for accusing him and he accepted (probably half heartedly). He told me I always blow up at him when we fight (we didn’t fight much, but 2 weeks before the end of the relationship we fought 3 times). I told him I need to sort my anger issues and will work on it bc I surprised myself with how angry I became. Then I said goodbye, wished him well and started no contact after that. He hasn’t tried to contact me either. Right now I’m taking time to heal and deal with my anger/insecurity regardless if we get back or not. But I’m wondering if you think I should just let the idea of getting him back go after this? Is the chance gone?
admin

March 8, 2015 at 2:55 pm

What made you accuse him like that though?
Nan

March 8, 2015 at 9:49 pm

Hi Chris, I read the Male Mind During the No Contact rule and the Extreme Guilt hypo you had put forth was kind of like us. I had seen him be a little flirty with a girl on social media just days after we ended it but then saw that he had told her to text him a couple weeks before on another picture. I guess it could’ve been innocent and they could’ve been friends but it seems a bit off. Anyways, I accused him without proof so that’s not good. But in the end, I really thought the questions you asked at the end of your post on “When you should stop trying to get your ex boyfriend back” were really honest. It lets me know that even though you’re in this business, you’re being straight up honest with us and asking us to be honest with ourselves and I really appreciate that. I’m probably a little more sensitive now because it seems like he moved on quickly, but if he comes back, he’s going to have to figure out how he’s going to fit into my improved life. I realize my angry insecurities also probably came about because I was frustrated by the waning attention, which is why I decided to end it in the first place. Should’ve held true to what I am at the core, an UG. I’m improving myself because your advice reminded me of that and I really appreciate it. Thanks Chris!
admin

March 13, 2015 at 3:40 pm

Well I am all for helping women get their exes back but I don’t want to mislead people.

Glad you enjoyed my writing.
Nan

March 7, 2015 at 11:39 pm

Hi Chris, I just read your other post about the Male Mind After the no contact rule. The “guilty kitten meme” made me laugh. The “Extreme Guilt” section was basically me and the guy. You’re a genius at this! Gave me good perspective. Thanks!
admin

March 8, 2015 at 2:56 pm

Thanks Nan!

You should also read the male mind during the no contact rule.

Kristin

February 26, 2015 at 4:11 am

Hello! I am in need of some good advice here 🙁 My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 months now. Our relationship overall i think is good but could be bettter too. We dont really see each other often and when I try and make plans with him (he never really asks me to hangout) something always seems to happen most of the time and we can’t see each other. We have never fought or disagreed over anything yet. But I simply texted him asking if he can come over after my race over the weekend so we can talk about some stuff, and all he said was “uh oh” and i replied “Are you nervous about something?” and he replied back “are you breaking up with me?” I thought it was kinda odd how that was the first thing he thought of. When I replied back i wasnt rude to him by any means, but I told him about how we never see each other (we saw each other twice in the whole month of january and its been over a month now since we’ve seen eaach other, it was january 18) and how he never asks me to hangout and whatnot. He answered saying that he works alot and hes sorry and that I was well aware when he asked me to commit to this relationship. I replied saying I understand and that I am not mad about that and that I’m just sad at the fact that he never wants to see me and its starting to make me feel like you dont really like me anymore. And he came back saying “Maybe we shouldnt continue this then. I mean your always working, i’m always working. Its not like you offer to come see me and if i dont text you first 90% of the time i wont hear from you. its a 2 way street” and I replied to his message very nicley saying i think this escalated very quickely and lets calm down for a second. And I asked him if he was breaking up with me and I really want to try and work things out and i dont think it would be fair to just end everything without even trying to fix not seeing each other more. Well he never answered that message. I texted him a few days after that just saying hey, and no answer after that either. I just texted him now, a week after that, saying “hey babe hope your having a good day. Im still kind of confused on our conversation last week can we please talk so we can clarify everything?” and i still have not yet had a response to that. Do I just need to give him more time? But he only texted me back twice about the issue and he wants to break up? I just dont understand how that would make you want to breakup with someone so fast, especially when we have not had ANY other problems or disagreements before. And this is the first time I was even bringing this up to him. I still keep thinking its not an actual breakup because he did say maybe and the rest of his message doesnt really sound like a break up text, and I asked him directly right after that if he was breaking up with me and he never answered to that. I’m just not sure what to do anymore:( Overall I guess is that im not really sure if we did break up or not. And I asked a couple times and he didnt answer. I dont know what else I need to do,

admin

March 1, 2015 at 6:08 pm

Have you tried the NC rule yet?

Sofia

February 5, 2015 at 5:12 am

Hi, Chris. I am actually involved in an interracial relationship with a black guy. Both of us have a lot of things in common. So we clicked off really well. I love him so much and I also know that he loves me very much. To love someone is to accept someone with his o her strengths and weaknesses. Unfortunately, my guy drinks on most nights while I’m a teetotaler. So when he goes out with his friends for drinks, I get real mad. I wish I could get all my hurtful words but I know I can’t. Well, the last argument was a night ago. And I miss him very much. After apologizing to him, he didn’t respond much to me. Do I do the NCP?

admin

February 5, 2015 at 3:41 pm

Would you consider him an alcoholic?
Sofia

February 8, 2015 at 5:32 am

No, I dont think so. He has too much time on his side. He is currently doing his degree full-time. So he hangs out with his friends a lot. Although the argument has already being resolved, I kept quiet the next few days because I was still feeling hurt from the argument. I replied whenever he called or texted me. When I sent messages, he replied later. I was thinking of doing the NCP of 2 weeks or lesser because I want him to chase after me.
Sofia

February 8, 2015 at 8:10 am

What is the best approach to act/behave after a heated argument?
admin

February 9, 2015 at 4:24 pm

Kill him with kindness…

Don’t bring up the argument anymore.
Sofia

February 11, 2015 at 12:36 pm

Sometimes I feel like doing a 1-2 week of NCP because of the angst and frustration. That gives ample time to give each other a breathing space. Will that help with the situation?

Susan

February 4, 2015 at 3:55 am

I was dating a guy for a month and a half, and things were going perfect – we did new years together, he was the sweetest most attentive, appreciative guy. He cooked me dinner, introduced me to a couple of his friends, told me he was crazy about me, complimented me in every way possible. He’d say that he told his mom I’m his main girl, and would tell her where we got dinner etc. Great chemistry, but I have not given up sex yet, but we did everything else. Then, I got too eager, and started texting first, offered for him to join gym with me, and go shopping together cause he needed winter clothes. I was not clingy, just too available / eager to spend time. He did mention that he wanted me to date only him. Week later I told him I want him to date only me, and that I am looking for something more serious. He said he wants to continue getting to know me but wasnt ready to be anyone’s bf. He keeps bringing up his career being priority at the moment, his recent break up with his ex (6mo ago), but that he also does not want to waste my time. I understand its a bit too soon. Then I offered to cook him dinner, but had to cancel cause I got sick (he offered to bring soup/food instead, I did not take him up on that). He asked me out to lunch later, but cancelled last minute due to work. Then offered to bring lunch on Saturday (i was still sick), but at 11:30am, not hearing from him, I called. He did not respond until 12:30, again canceling due to work, but saying he wanted to see me later in the day once he is free, and asking if we are still on for Sunday plans. I said I wasn’t sure, and canceled on him telling him I did not feel things were right. He said he’d call, but instead texted with a big apology for not letting me know in advance. It was suspicious to me why he did not call. I did not respond to that text that weekend, and on Monday texted that it wasnt cool to do that. He apologized again, but stopped responding after I said it was my biggest pet peeve and inconsiderate. After 2 days of not talking (even though he texted me almost every morning previously), I said “not Isis… lets do happy hour”. We did, and things were cool, he seemed into me, kissed me couple of times, asked about my exes, talked about if I was not planning to get married in the next year or so, again brought up vacation, meeting his parents, and following up – oh nm thats too soon. Although it felt like it was the same lines over and over again. And I had this giant feeling/intuition he is a smooth talker who is playing me, and that he might be dating someone else. He said this weekend his cousin was in town Fri-sat, but he was free sunday for superbowl and wanted to watch with me and my friends; and that he needs to plan a date for us early this week. But then he said he will be gone back home the weekend after, and that his parents may be in town at some point later in the month as well. This made made me suspicious that he plans to be gone so much. It sounded way too unbelievable for someone to be this busy, and I got a feeling he found another girl. Later he said he will call, but he did not. Saturday he texted “hey lovely how are you, how was last night”, I responded much later in the day about my previous night. He asked about my plans for the night, and I responded “I am going out for dinner and drinks.” I hear nothing that night, or on sunday in regards to superbowl (this time i did not inquire if our plans were still on), nothing monday, and today he sends a snapchat of him getting coffee. I have not responded. I can’t tell if the guy is playing me while seeing another chick who is now his main girl. My intuition says he is, but I could be wrong. Am I playing too hard to get? Are these typical player moves? His birthday is in 2 days, and a month ago I was invited. I have not heard anything about it. What to do? Do I let it go? Or am I being too evasive (I assumed he’d try harder if I did that, but he did not.)

admin

February 4, 2015 at 2:24 pm

I think if you want him back you should give it a try.
Susan

February 9, 2015 at 5:54 pm

Chris, could you please suggest what to do about this whole thing? He tells me he wants to see me 3 times over text, but doesn’t make any solid plans. I can’t tell if he is just leading me on, or thats just how he runs things where I have to initiate?
admin

February 10, 2015 at 3:25 pm

Actions speak louder than words.

So, its not good that he keeps standing you up.

Was he always like that though?
Susan

February 10, 2015 at 7:19 pm

No, he was good about it before. I did have to at times bring up and ask him before if plans are still on, and usually yes. If I didn’t ask then he sometimes would not follow up with final plans. Recently he started doing this after I got upset at him and cancelled on him after he cancelled on me at the last minute without forewarning. After this he still texts me he misses me and wants to see me, but won’t make a solid plan and disappears. The only explanation I can find is that he is dating someone else and put me on the backburner. But if so, why text me he misses me and wants to see me on a number of occasions. I have not contacted him first at all over last few weeks.
Susan

February 4, 2015 at 5:44 pm

But how? He is the one who is telling me he will call, will plan a date, wants to spend time, but when the time comes I hear nothing… I don’t want to chase him, and I am not sure if he is serious because he isn’t doing what he says he will.

Caitlynn

January 25, 2015 at 3:15 pm

Okay so… My boyfriend and I haven’t been dating for very long like about a month today, but he wanted to take a break. He said “I need some space I just want time with my friends and I want to do things that I haven’t had time to do.” I replied with a simple i understand… then I got a snapchat of him and another girl holding hands and i kinda flipped out… what does a break meen to you… cause to me it means time away from eachother but your still dating. I don’t kn own what to do i love him and when we are together I’m so happy I don’t know if we are still dating he won’t answer me. I sent him a text saying things about our relationship like how he asked me to be his girlfriend on christmas and on new years how we kissed and how much fun I had at winter formal… and I just want my relationship to work out with him I’ve never felt this way towards any of my ex’s I love him we have been talking for about 3 months in all but he js everything j could ever ask for….

admin

January 26, 2015 at 3:53 pm

Would you be willing to enter into a NC rule?

kate

December 11, 2014 at 11:41 pm

PLEASE HELP!! I met a guy 3 weeks ago, he asked me out on a dinner date, but i said no..(silly me) instead i texted him saying we should me up for drinks, and we did. This happened twice in 2 weeks. We went back to his place and got very intimate, (but i would not have sex with him) and i told him i dont put out unless im in a relationship. After about a week, i texted him to meet up to play tennis as we both agreed we should try and get to know eachother sober. But when we organised tennis, we had to cancel due to rain, so i offered to watch movies at his place instead. And he said that it would not be a good idea to come over, because he wont be able to help himself and he would just want to bed me. I tried to convince him that we could control ourselves, but he was adamant that it wasnt a good idea. i still pushed the situation. But he was adamant that i shouldnt. So i left it at that. But i did something really stupid, later that night i got drunk and wanted some company, so at 1030pm at night, i went over to his house, i texted him to say im coming over, but go no response. When i rocked up at his house, he wasnt to impressed, to see me drunk, although he still let me in, after questioning again about where this is going, he got annoyed and said best that i leave because he has to get up early for work the next day. He said he felt like i was interogating him, and basically escorted me out. The next day i had a massive hang over and felt like the biggest, desperate, needy idiot. I like this guy alot, so i sent him a text to say how embarrassed i was and how pathetic i felt for my actions and prefusley apologized. 5 hours later i got this response from him “i appreciate your text. glad you got home safe, peace and goodluck.” i freaked out at this, and sent a text back “can i call you after work?” i got no response so i called him after work anyway, he didnt answer (which i expected) so i just left a message on his voicemail, saying “hey look, im not here to hassle you, just hoping we can be friends and you can find it in your heart to forgive me” got no response to that either. OMG this guy probably thinks im the biggest pysco, but i just want a companion and im soooooo attracted to him. PLEASE HELP, desperate. Should i leave it for a week, and then just send a friendly text saying, “hey how are you, you up for a chat?” and if no response to that, then just realise that ive lost this one. And delete his number?? Please please give me some advice. I really like this guy.

admin

December 15, 2014 at 5:29 am

Ok first off, men need to be romanced a bit too at times and you were putting the pressure on big time.

L Davies

December 11, 2014 at 9:23 pm

So, my boyfriend and I had a fight last night which, I will hold my hands up here, was my fault mostly. Tired, with 3 babies and a partner is quite demanding work. Especially when said partner offers help then other stuff comes up, leaving said housewife in the ditch. Anyway, it was a calm argument, I took myself away, thought better of what I was saying and apologized for being a cowbag. He accepted my apology, said sorry too, then we kissed and made up. End of argument? I wish!
Well, I message him this morning asking about his day and general chitchat. No response but he has read my message. This man is a serial texter. So, I text him an hour later (we are still living together at this point) apologizing again and thanking him for leaving some brekkie out for the kids. Still no response. That us the one thing he knows I can’t stand is the silent treatment. To me it is controlling and manipulative, not to mention immature. Anywho, I message him calling him out on it. And, huzzah, he’s alive!!! He tells me that he doesn’t know what to say that he’s still upset but he doesn’t want to break up. A few texts later, me apologizing more, he then says he can’t see us working. End of me texting him. I did your nc before with him about 2 months ago, worked a treat, will it work again. And, if you think it does, is he even worth another shot? I am an adult who discusses things through rationally, but can have my wobbly moments under enough stress. Help me, I am at a loss, sitting here waiting for him to collect his belongings which I have lovingly packed up. All yours, unlucky in love (always wanted to say that)

admin

December 15, 2014 at 5:21 am

3 babies is a lot for anyone. But your partner should be helpoing you right.

Judie

December 1, 2014 at 9:36 am

I dated my boyfriend for 6 months, broke up more than 10 times and got back together again.At first he did tell me that he had a problem with his moods he can just be quiet for a while without a reason, so i tried to be understanding.then things started changing he didn’t bother to call or text me but when we were together most of his time he will be on the phone calling other people but when um away he wouldn’t do that.i am too emotional and short tempered so most of the time i was the one to tell him i want us to break up because i thought i was forcing him to love me even to call me. but at the end i was the one again to apologize and then get back together. then the cycle of not calling begins leading to breaking up and getting back together again. this lead to nagging and he started giving me a hard shoulder, he will just keep quiet when i ask him something.nowadays he doesnt have time for me but when we are at church he flirts with me and that’s it….no calling or replying my messages.

he just sent me this message…I dnt c this relationship working.lets jst cut it off.

man thats hurts big time. but to tell u the truth he is a good man when were together i felt like a princess.just the thought of another woman having him is killing me.i just read your blog hope the NC will help me get my man back

admin

December 1, 2014 at 3:40 pm

10 breakups???

Are you serious?

NC will definitely help I think.

shivangi

November 25, 2014 at 4:43 am

Hi chris,went through the article and found it to be insightful.me and my boyfriend were in a 2 year long erelationship.we loved each other a lot.in july i decided to shift back to my hometown and in august because of my mistakes ( lets say i acted like a 3 year kid asking for a chocolate) we had a huge fight for an extremely stupid reason.so i decided to break up but the next day i realized my mistake and called him upto say sorry.now my boyfriend did not want to get back together telling mr that he needs some time out.i was angry,the love of my life wanted time out.the only thing i could think of was visiting.i visited him and stayed with him but he still wanted the time out.so we decided not to talk before October but i like a needy prson ended up calling him up once in every 15 days .so oct came and went but he still did not call me…so i called him up on 1st nov…asking whats going on???he said that he misses me and is lonely and unhappy but thinks thatif we get back together we will fight again…rathr we are two diff ppl who want diff things…now i am one stubborn person.i called him up again in 15 days..he was out with his friends.i called him because he had blocked me everywhere…i asked him why..he said he did it to stop himself from checking my activity daily.now i have told him i will come to meet him on 27th dec and from 15 nov to 27th dec i am trying to practice nc…now i know the post is really long…but i dont know what to do

admin

November 25, 2014 at 3:11 pm

This isn’t that long at all.

First off, how far have you made it in NC?
shivangi

November 26, 2014 at 3:33 am

Hey…this is my third attempt at nc..
we broke up on aug 28 and i started nc for 15 days and called him back in sept then we started it again i called him back in early days of oct.then i called him up on 1st nov and he said that he does not want time to think but wants to breakup…the last i called him was on 10 th nov and since then i am following NC
admin

November 26, 2014 at 3:17 pm

Man, you are just having trouble with that NC rule huh?
shivangi

November 26, 2014 at 6:01 pm

Yes….tell me about it…i have been impulsively calling him ….my feeling overpower any logic…
what should i do now…could you help me..my boyfriend means a lot to me.
admin

November 28, 2014 at 3:00 pm

I think you need to let your logic come back.
shivangi

November 28, 2014 at 4:23 pm

Do you think i have a chance of getting him back after a successful NC?? I am already 20 days into my current NC attempr…without calling.

mandy

October 27, 2014 at 5:20 pm

hii admin,
i must say great article.well,i and my guy are in relationship from 1year.we are each other’s best friend but things have changed now.there is no confusion that he still loves me but i am involved in work all the day and he expect me to talk to him which i try all day.things have now gone worst.he is always like pissed off.we have fights after every 3 days.but i really love this guy.i always gets angry and decides to break up but i cnt live a hour without him.i am just helpless.always i come forward because i know he will never come following me his pain is much bigger

admin

October 28, 2014 at 4:21 pm

Why do you guys fight so much?

3 days for a fight is a lot.

Tess

October 16, 2014 at 3:24 pm

Hi, I was recently in a 5 month relationship with my bf. We do not know if we are still together or if we are on a pause? We have been talking to each other but just a simple hi/bye conversation. I really love him since he is my first boyfriend I actually feel loved by.I guess I want to know how do I get him back from this pause/relationship fiasco. I really have been super happy with him, but now I have been moody and depressed.

admin

October 27, 2014 at 2:51 pm

Why not just talk to him to see where you stand.

kaitlyn roman

August 28, 2014 at 11:34 pm

Hi there okay so my bf and I dated for about a year we were long distance but moved in with eachother and then we had a pretty bad fallout I confessef I kissed somebody and he was so cold and upset after that even cried he broke up with me then for me to find out he as well cheated on me so at this point I told him I didn’t care that we both made mistakes and I wanted to work on things we agreed but we decided I should move back home so I did amd we were working on things but he was so unaffectionate it was hahard for me so I broke up with him he started crying and I immediately took it bacm begged him to stay with me for days texting and calling like crazy just found out I might be pregnant called and told him that while I was being really mmean to him he said he couldn’t take the way I treated him he said I act like I need him so I called him and left a voicemail saying ill let you know the results tomorrow then ill leave you alone for good. I know this is all messed up but is there anyway this can still work? He says he still loves me its just so hard to talk to me because I’m always mad at him that it is unhealthy to be like this

admin

August 29, 2014 at 12:09 pm

Man I wish you hadn’t of kissed some other guy. The problems stemmed from there (though he cheated on you as well.) Was it before or after he found out you kissed someone?

gennie

August 28, 2014 at 9:07 pm

Hello!
Well I have been dating this guy for 3 months now and apparently I got pregnant he wanted me to keep the baby so much but then I couldn’t cause of fear of parents and I’m still in school so I told him so he was mad but we still were communicated then last Thursday he posted a picture of this gal and him and I wasn’t pleased so I told him and when he tried explaining himself I ignored his text on whatsapp in like two days I was very pissed so I fuel he waited after seeing the ignorance he blocked me and we haven’t talked since…I really miss him and want to fix things so what should I do?

admin

August 29, 2014 at 12:02 pm

Have you read my guide on what to do if he blocks you?
gennie

September 2, 2014 at 9:41 pm

Thanks it worked 🙂
gennie

August 28, 2014 at 9:18 pm

It’s been five days since he blocked and I haven’t checked on him at all

Anonymous

August 25, 2014 at 8:23 pm

Hi Chris,

My “ex” is a coworker that I’ve been casually seeing off-and-on for the past 3 years. We have been back “on” for the past 4 months and about a week ago, we got into a fight and now he’s ignoring me. In fact, whenever I mention any commitment, he shuts off. I’m now doing NC and I’m not sure if we’ll get back together. I haven’t decided if I even want that. But in case he reaches out, how do I act when together? Is it even possible to get him to commit like your article “how to get your ex to commit”? Do I tell him how annoying he is being or am I supposed to act NOT emotional, dramatic, and crazy aka ungettable girl? Or do I realize that he’ll never change and I should just read your “when to stop getting your ex back”? He’s 38 by the way. Sorry – there are 100 questions in this post. thanks so much for any advice!

admin

August 26, 2014 at 1:43 pm

What was the fight over?
Anonymous

August 26, 2014 at 2:17 pm

I was very drunk and asked if he was dating other girls at work event, and he was mad obviously because it was not the right time or place. However, I was very embarrassed and apologized profusely and even wished him a happy birthday the following weekend…with no reply from him.

Faith

July 3, 2014 at 1:11 am

Me and my boyfriend have been fighting the last week because I have been more emotional than usual and have been nagging a lot. Well we were fighting last night over that he invited ex gfs to a party bes having so I got super mad and mean and he saw it was no big deal and that I over react. Well I told him I don’t want to be with him anymore and other hurtful stuff and to leave my apt so he did which was a hr drive back home so he was so mad I tried begging him to stay but he wouldn’t then.. Then he changed his relationship status on fb and deleted me. I’ve been trying to talk to him and he’s ignored me all day and he’s never done that. Does this mean his feelings weren’t real or they’ve gone away? Will he always just think I’m crazy

admin

July 7, 2014 at 5:13 pm

Well, why would he need to invite them to the party? I feel you have a right to be mad. That’s kind of weird.

I think you just need to put some distance between him and you for a little bit.

Sophie

June 18, 2014 at 12:41 am

I may not be looking on ways to get my “ex” boyfriend back… I’m more so looking for the appropriate way to communicate and not have it lead to the point of breaking up. I know, I know… there’s no crystal ball or magic wand to be waved that will allow the inevitable from happening because whatever happens, happens but I feel like my boyfriend and I just had our first very big fight and we can work through it together. We’ve been dating for a year & a half and have most recently moved in together, which could be the exact stress that has allowed us to find ourselves in such a bind. We’ve both taken a week off from each other to get space but now we are back in our apartment and he has agreed to talk to me tonight. I occasionally texted him to just let him know that “I hope he has a good night at work” or “I appreciate you for working so hard and putting in as many hours as you do”. I also got him a little gift to show my appreciation for his recent hard work that I’m going to give him tonight. I wrote him a letter while I was away for a week and am excited to read it to him because I feel it pours out all the inner workings of my love for him that I wasn’t able to communicate before but what else can I do to make sure he understands that we can work through this first argument together instead of just calling it quits.

admin

June 18, 2014 at 1:44 pm

Well, texting is really good b/c you can’t raise your voice and he can’t raise your voice.

« Previous 1 … 3 4 5 6 7 Next »

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

311 thoughts on “Get Your Boyfriend Back After A Fight”