How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend To Speak To You- Get Him Talking Again

1,518 thoughts on “Making Your Ex Boyfriend Speak To You Again”

Mackie

February 27, 2015 at 11:18 pm

Is it creepy to try and talk to an ex after he tells you to never talk to him and it was because you got too clingy? Also if I do try to talk to him, what sort of text would I send? I’m three weeks into no contact.

Mackie

March 1, 2015 at 7:52 pm

Hey I know you’re very busy but I don’t want to venture into the realm of crazy with this guy. Is NC enough to get over being told to never talk to someone if they haven’t reached out to you. Should I wait more than 30 days?
admin

March 2, 2015 at 9:21 pm

I think 30 days is ideal for this actually.
Mackie

March 4, 2015 at 1:40 am

Thanks for your advice! I think I speak for all of us when I say you are a hero for a broken heart 🙂 keep up the good work!
admin

March 5, 2015 at 8:29 pm

Thanks Mackie!

Anything else I can help you with.
Mackie

March 6, 2015 at 6:17 am

Perhaps… How long generally does it take a man to get over being seriously burned by a woman. I want to be friends with this boy, not back together with him, but he’s in a relationship that he thinks I ruined because he cheated on her with me. Are ex boyfriends willing to be friends after something like that? And I feel like in this scenario I can’t send a remember text… Seeing as he told me not to talk to him aha. Would you still recommend a nonchalant text like you do in this guide?
admin

March 7, 2015 at 5:50 pm

Hmm… years depending on how much a guy loves the woman.
Mackie

March 8, 2015 at 2:23 am

As in he would forgive me quicker the more he loved me? And again thinking from my scenario, perhaps a guide on how to approach your ex telling you to never talk to him again? If I think of anymore I’ll let cha know!
Mackie

March 7, 2015 at 12:18 am

Also, not sure if you take suggestions, but perhaps a blog on what to do when you become the side girl to your ex boyfriend could be helpful! I don’t know if a lot of girls are in my position but I would have found that super helpful and maybe other girls in the future will benefit from it 🙂
admin

March 7, 2015 at 6:11 pm

I definitely take suggestions.

Can you think of anymore?

samantha

February 26, 2015 at 8:07 pm

I completed the 30 day no contact with my ex, he didn’t get in touch so a week or so later I dropped him a text asking how his exams had gone. He did respond but said they hadn’t gone well. I text him back and said I wished him luck for the next set and asked how a hobby of his was. Didn’t hear anything for a couple of weeks so I text him again asking if he was ready to talk about why we split and that if he wanted I was good with friends (he struggles with relationships so it wasn’t that we weren’t getting along or were unhappy) as we agreed we would speak a few weeks down the way and he seemed to want to be friends. I haven’t heard back and not sure what my options are
Speechless

February 25, 2015 at 6:04 pm

Hi,i had a very big fight with my boyfriend 4 days back. it all happened because of a small issue. each time we fight because of small issue only. and it dragged for 1 week. we dont speak. then either i call him or he call me and we speak again, forget everything. But, this time, we fought infront of his friend. i insulted him, he insulted me and we both said we wont speak to each other and see each other again. our 3 yrs relationship is over. But, the thing is his birthday is next week. I am wondering whether i should wish him or not.Or do the NC for 30 days

admin

February 25, 2015 at 10:09 pm

Nc for next 30 days.

nameless

February 21, 2015 at 7:43 pm

Hi my bf and I broke up last summer, may exactly and the reason was that it came to the point where he was in the position that he needed to choose between his family or me and I didn’t wanted him to decided so I broke up with him. We we’re in love, we didn’t have any problems, we were happy. I thought I knew that I had no problems moving on but it turns out I did. He’s a classmate of mine and I see him all the time, people tells me he always stares at me, and we are on no contact terms. He tells people he already moved on, but why does he do what he did when I first met him. We were classmates, yes! but we weren’t exactly friends either at the time that we weren’t close before we were together. is he over me?

admin

February 22, 2015 at 5:14 pm

Has he moved on really though?

Taylor

February 20, 2015 at 1:16 pm

My ex and I were in a relationship for 3 and half years. I broke it off because I was simply not getting anything out of being with him. Since we started dating in middle school, it was hard to break old habits. Also girls he befriended were outwardly disrespectful to me and our relationship and he would do anything about it. I was tired of being upset and feeling overprotective. It’s been 3 months since the break up and I’ve tried everything to get over it. He was my best friend and I don’t really care about those other girls anymore. I’ve grown as a person and I need help to make him see that. Because I see how he’s changed as well but he won’t speak to me.

admin

February 21, 2015 at 12:03 am

When was the last time you talked to him?

hopeless

February 18, 2015 at 6:55 pm

My ex and I broke up on new years day. I been with him for 5 years and I love him with all my heart. As of right now we have zero communication no contact even if I wanted to. I have been block on social media and everything and I still want him. Back our five year relationship has not been perfect I met him in college at 19years old and we have been on and off until this January and all of our breakups have been due to miss communication,immaturity,he has cheated. This breakup happened b/c its was new years and one of his friends called to get a ride and he wanted to leave me and get them at that moment I was upset I didn’t wanted him to choose me and spend time with me he didn’t. I left angry and was locked out from his life ever since. It hurts soo bad. I tried to contact him on his birthday no response at all.I have been doing my best to move on going out have fun but inside it hurts. I guess I always imagined being with him now I’m not its hard to accept. Do people stay angry forever? Do he ever think about the breakup or me? I invested so much in this relationship. One of his friends told a mutual friend that she doubts that we will ever stop messing with each other because we have a lot of history. A family member told me that he had said he missed me. I honestly think all our problems are reconcilable. My friends are tired of me talking about him b/c we are so off and on they can’t take us serious I’m embrassed and hurt. I just want to talk and see whats going on and I pray all the time and sometimes I wonder like if this isnt the man for me why would god allow us to cross paths and for so long. And if he’s not the one when will I accept that its over move on and be OK.I don’t wanna be hopeless I’m trying everything to let it go but after 1 month or so he’s still my first and last thought of the day. He once told me that he can move on and never talk to me again he had to but he don’t think I could. He also said that if we broke up I wouldn’t want to be friends again. Its so much..
Katelyn

February 10, 2015 at 3:11 pm

My boyfriend and I have been fighing for a while. We have been together almost 3 years and near the end he started to get very distant and moody. He told me that he wasn’t happy with his life and that he was becoming depressed but wanted to stay with me and fix it. I made the mistake of getting on him about it becuase he would often take his mood out on me. He then told me that he needed time to himself to work on himself but that he wanted to stay together so I tried to give him that time. He also had a lot of female friends that he works with that he would go out with which would cause more arguments because he never invited me and I am a very jelous and insecure person. So anyways this past thursday I spent the night at his house and we got into a bickerment and I asked him if he wanted me to leave. He said no and I asked him what he was holding on too anymore and he responded with “idk us? what do you think i’m doing leading you on for some grand finaly to break your heart?”…… the next day he broke up with me OVER TEXT MESSAGE…. earlier that day we were talking about what we were doing for valentines day and then he went to work and later on that night I recieved a text message saying “I can’t do this anymore katie”. I was completely in shock and I was repulsed that he would do it over text. I then called him and he said that he still loves me more than anything but that we arn’t good together. He said he can’t give me the things I want like kids and marriage but I told him that i didn’t even know if I wanted those things and that I wanted to stay together anyways and see what happens in the future. He said that was desperate of me to say which really hurt me. He then went on and said that he always belived that you should get your life together before you settle down and that he wants to do that. He said he got offered a job far away but tuned it down for me and dropped the idea of going to school far away for me. I then told him that I only had 1 more year of school left and that after that we could move and do whatever he wanted to do but he wouldn’t have it. He said that he had been planning on doing this for about 2 weeks but just couldn’t do it knowing how much he would hurt me. He said he had been talking to his friends at work about it and that his decision was made and we were done for good. I was so devistated that I hung up on him but sent him a ton of texts the next day bagging him to re concider with no response. I know now that I shouldn’t have done that but I just want to know if I have any chance with him again. LIke why would ge plan valentines day with me the day he ended it and tell me he still loves me more than anything. Its been 4 days and it still says he is in a relationship with me on facebook. I have no idea what to think or what to do.

hopeless

February 18, 2015 at 7:14 pm

I don’t think he wants to hurt you but I do think he wants to have his life together so maybe in the future u can be better for each other maybe he feels outshined by you.I know your pain and regret after sending tons of text I been there I would suggest to stop doing that allow yourself to mourn and if or when your comfortable try to become friends
Mary Ellen

February 13, 2015 at 7:51 pm

This sound so much like my story I almost had to re read it to make sure I didn’t write it myself !!! Everything down to the text “I can’t do this anymore ” is exactly what my ex told me… I’m 3 months post break up and my ex has moved to a different country to start getting his life together ( I too have 1 year left in school ) … Thing is he text me last week and we have been communicating back and forth since ! I don’t want to jinx it but I think I might see a future again !

Basically katelyn what I’m trying to say is I know exactly what your going through but take some advice , read this site back to front and use it as ur bible and your man will be back . Trust me.
admin

February 10, 2015 at 4:24 pm

Just don’t go on Facebook for a while.

Are you currently doing NC?

Adrienne

February 9, 2015 at 3:21 pm

What if he has blocked your number? Like, he has blocked my texts and calls. Can I do this or something similar over voicemail or email?

admin

February 9, 2015 at 4:49 pm

Visit the page I wrote about blocking.

apples

February 4, 2015 at 7:28 am

So my boyfriend broke up with me and told me “in a week or two i will be sling to try again.” He then kissed me and we ended that conversation on a good note. I gave him a week of space, i didn’t contact him at all and so then i asked him “so how do you feel now?” And he told me “i never want to be with you again.” And i asked him when he was planning on telling me and he said “whenever you asked” he then told me he realized this two days after we had talked and i was very hurt and mad and i then asked if he wanted to be friends and he said “no, i don’t want to talk to u ou anymore.”

We broke up because of somewhat emotional cheating, i emailed you the situation but you never replied 🙁 i.I’m just wondering why he is so cruel a of a sudden? I think there is no hope. I know that. But why the sudden change?

admin

February 4, 2015 at 2:27 pm

Sling to try again?

I am sorry about the lack of replying through email.

I am having to pick what to answer because I get so many but I am coming out soon with something to really help you guys.

Marissa

January 29, 2015 at 5:05 pm

So my freshman year of high school, my best friend introduced me to a guy and we hit it off. We texted each other every day and it was obvious that we liked each other a lot. We were never really official because he wanted a relationship with me but I didn’t know if I wanted to commit to that. So we stopped talking for a while and about a month later he dated some girl for maybe a week and i started talking to him again and he broke up with her right away. Things were looking up until we lost contact once again because we were busy with our own lives and I tried talking to him after the summer and he got very defensive and told me he had a girlfriend, implying he didn’t want me talking to him. So I got pretty upset and stopped talking to him.

After a few months, they broke up and I thought that was my chance, so I waited a few weeks after the breakup to text him and he actually wanted to talk to me. I was surprised because it was just like things used to be between us. I didn’t want to seem desperate so I didn’t try talking to him constantly and he never made an effort to talk to me after that. One of my friends talked to him about me and he said that things were “awkward” between us.

I decided to move on and the next time I saw him was junior year when we had the same math class, and OF COURSE the teacher made us sit next to each other…. The whole time we had the class, he avoided all eye contact with me. At this point I was completely done with him, so I thought it was a bit silly.

I’m in college now and I saw someone on campus that I thought was pretty attractive. As soon as I got a good look at him and we locked eyes, I realized it was the guy I was with in high school. He’s changed a lot, and looks less awkward than he was before. I thought I was over him but now all these memories and feelings are coming back and I don’t know what to do!! It’s been such a long time I don’t even know what I would say to him! I don’t know if I want to be his girlfriend, but I miss him a lot and I want to be friends, at least.

admin

January 30, 2015 at 3:47 pm

Did the two of you ever date officially?

Beatrice

January 29, 2015 at 2:53 pm

I did 30 day nc with my ex. I sent a text after 30 day nc and I’ve waited 12 hours now and there still is no reply. You mentioned he may be hurt from our breakup but i didn’t cheat although i did lie. Also, before i went nc he told me he didn’t want to be my friend and to leave him alone! He was the one who wanted the relationship in the beginning and told me he loved me and introduced me to his child and his mother and even tried to get me pregnant during our relationship, he even gave me a key to his townhouse. we dated for 7 months. But met two years prior to us finally dating. I lied about someone i had used to date which he forgave me and then he caught me in alie about someone sending flowers to my job because i didn’t know who they were from and i just lied and said they were from a family member be cause i didn’t want him to worry. Ive been 100% faithful! I feel my ex was finally the one. Im 29 he is 35! Why has he completely shut me out? How can he go from loving me so deeply to not even want me in his life?? I wish i never lied. Is there anyway to show him and prove i would never lie again? What do i do next?

admin

January 30, 2015 at 3:41 pm

Has he ever been married before by any chance?
Beatrice

January 30, 2015 at 9:00 pm

No. He has never been married.

Amanda

January 26, 2015 at 7:17 pm

Hi, I have a quick question. My bf and I have been off and on for almost a year. We loved eachother very much, but I have borderline personality disorder. Long story short, he broke up with me two weeks ago because I got mad at him because he changed plans last minute… do you think I have a chance? I miss him so much.

admin

January 27, 2015 at 2:33 pm

Borderline personality disorder.

Have you talked to anyone about it?

Laura

January 25, 2015 at 12:11 am

I really need some advice. Basically I have had a boyfriend- or had rather- a boyfriend of nearly four years. I was convinced I was in love with him and that I would marry him. He helped me through a very tough time in my life and has always been there for me. Then I met someone else. I met them and it just instantly clicked, there was just something there. So I stayed with my boyfriend and talked to this new guy, really confused as to what I felt and what I wanted to do about it all. The new guy and I got into three major fights- the first was that he didnt want to ‘ruin’ me by making me dump my boyfriend for him incase it didnt work out, the second we fell out because when on a break with my boyfriend I may have kissed the new guy and slept next to him after a night out and then he didnt reply to my texts or anything so I got angry at him and may have drunkenly thrown a drink on him (not my finest moment) and then the third and last time we fell out was because again we had spent a night together, but he had said all this stuff about how he really really liked me, and how he wanted to be with me and more lovey dovey stuff and we continued to talk after that night so I assumed everything was fine until I saw him in a club with another girl and drunk me got upset- I didnt say anything to him but he lashed out at me saying that I hadnt broken up with my boyfriend technically and how do I have the right to get upset at him bringing a girl home. After that he said that he wants to forget about everything that we had. I got back together with my boyfriend-probably for the wrong reasons but I am so used to having him there, we used to spend every day together, he was a big part of my life, almost an integral part- until a couple of days ago. The new guy is still ignoring me and I asked him to meet up a week or so ago after not talking to him for 3 weeks and he said again that he didnt want to meet, and wanted just to forget everything and that he was sorry. I really want him back though. I really miss everything about him. Everything reminds me about him. I see his mates all the time as they are friends with my flatmates. I really want to talk to him again even if its just as friends. Although there is now another spanner in the works…when I was blackout drunk I went home with his flatmate and ended up staying the night. Even admitting this on here where no one knows who I am makes me feel vile and dirty. I really need this boy back in my life, please if you can, give me some advice how to do this? Thank you for your time!
Elaine

January 23, 2015 at 10:52 am

Hi. My boyfriend broke up with me two weeks ago. We have been together for 2 years, and he broke up with few days after our 2 years anniversary. He said he have had enough of me for bugging him and annoying him all the time. I admit that I have annoyed him a lot because we only meet up with each other once a month, and when I miss him, I would spam his calls and texts just to get his attention. I have been using the no contact rule for 3 days now. He said he hates me and wouldn’t want to be with me anymore in his entire life. what should i do?
jennifer

January 23, 2015 at 9:42 am

I ran into my old boss from 20 yrs ago, we started seeing each other off n on for 3 ,yrs , and downfall of this is he was married, he actually broke up with me because he wanted to be with me so bad he knew he couldn’t because of his marriage, so, after he broke up with me for 2 months he realized he missed me and started seeing me again, after 3 years of seeing him his wife last year committed suicide, ever since then he will not talk to me at all once or no matter what I do, I say, because we’re very much in love with each other but then kills with his wife being gone now if I think he takes it out on me to send this room so much it kills me even if I begged him to talk to me over the phone over text message you just will not do it, and thank him just to say hi to me just to let me know how he’s doing and again nothing it’s as if I’m dead to him, the owner’s wife was alive he wanted me in his life forever, I don’t know what they’re doing in the morning because all I’ve ever wanted to know that we do have a chance of being together he hates me or at least he acts like he does he told me in the beginning he hated himself not me and I’ve heard from him since, we had the last year off anon I have sent him lots of messages a lot of them being angry with him being mad being upset, i just want him to talk to me again and he just will not do it it’s been a year, ,. what do I do?? Please help me.

admin

January 23, 2015 at 4:41 pm

Jesus… he was cheating on his wife no wonder she felt bad.

That is some serious drama.

You want him back knowing he cheated on her with you?

dani

January 23, 2015 at 12:59 am

Hi- I could really use some advice on my current situation, this is the short version.

So Peter, me and him were in the same class together and we have mutual friends. We initially were attracted to each other and of course began flirting. He initiated everything first. We flirted a lot in class and outside of class and then he began texting me, adding me on snapchat, following me on twitter, and instagram all that good stuff. We started off as good friends and he asked me if “hooking up would be an option” I said sure why not. So our strictly physical relationship was a secret, no one knew, not even our best friends. It was really fun and mysterious and exciting. Over time, naturally we began to have feelings for each other. He wanted to date and I was hesitant on it because of complicated issues with my family, friends, and the fact that we are departing our own ways after we graduate. So in the mean time he told me that he was fine with our relationship the way it was, a secret. So we weren’t exactly dating, but we kind of were. It just felt like we were because we did things that couples do.

I think that we hurt each other a lot through our relationship because we weren’t exactly dating so we could do whatever we wanted with whoever we wanted. He had plenty of opportunities to be with other girls and he never took them, although I stressed to him that I didn’t mind. I guess that at the moment I didn’t mind, but deep down I did. He never took those opportunities though because he felt so strongly about me. I appreciated that but I also felt like I was holding him back and felt guilty, so that’s why I always said feel free to do whatever. Every time we encountered situations like that, he told me felt like I didn’t like him and care about him as strongly and as much as he did to me. I assured him plenty of times that it’s not true, I feel so strongly for you and that will never change. I wish that he talked to me more about how he was feeling because he just seemed to shrug it off like it was no big deal, but deep down I guess that everything that I said that negatively went against out relationship hurt him, he just never expressed it to me on a deep level.

Anyways, getting down to the nitty gritty stuff. We were both on winter break, and I was on vacation. We emailed and stayed in touch. The day after I got back we went to the movies and hooked up in my car after and we talked about us for a while. He kept pushing the idea of us dating and again I hesitated and said, what’s wrong with what were doing now, I can’t date you blah blah blah. He seemed disappointed but okay with it. I guess I figured that he felt so strongly for me that he would never leave me so I didn’t worry about us as much as I should have because after that night, we barely talked. He didn’t really text me or if he did we would have short conversations. When we got back to school, again we had short conversations, he stopped walking with me and as the days progressed stopped looking at me, never answered any of my text messages, stopped talking to me altogether. I later confronted him asking what the deal was, and he responded by saying “I can’t do this anymore, we can talk tomorrow.” I was so shocked that those words came out of his mouth, because he believed in us so much, and he liked me so much so I was in shock when he said that because that is something that I would have said, not him.

Anyway, what’s the first thing I did. Texted, called and harassed him in person in order to get an answer from him. An honest answer too. We talked very briefly in person in between classes, and then when I tried texting him he stopped answering me. He avoided talking to me about our problems altogether and I was heartbroken. I didn’t know what else to do but totally harass him. I wrote him letters, and asked his friends to talk to him, and all of this stuff that I shouldn’t have done. I stopped talking to him for about a week or so. And then I bombed him with more text messages and calls, still no answer.

The thing with me is that I can’t have closure and officially move on until we talk about what happened because it’s just so confusing to me. I understand that there was an issue between us, but if we really talked and he expressed everything that he needed to to me then we could have worked it out, but he just gave up. I told him exactly how I felt, that I wanted to date him because I realized that my life sucks without him and I’m not happy without him. I’m giving him exactly what he wants, and what I want too, and he still won’t budge. It’s been about 2-2 1/2 weeks since he sent me that break up text. I feel like he’s already moved on with his life and i’m still reliving and replaying those last 2 weeks in my head constantly.

Let me know what you think and what you can do to help! Thanks so much.

admin

January 23, 2015 at 4:23 pm

Have you messaged him since the initial breakup 2 and a half weeks ago.
dani

January 23, 2015 at 6:45 pm

yes I have. But now I’m starting no contact again.

geni

January 22, 2015 at 7:04 pm

Me and me gf broke up 1 month ago we have been together for 1 year I really love her it is my fist love. This is the second time we broke up , and I dont know why? She said to me some stupid things that I don’t understand things like u are diffrent from me, you don’t have immagination etcc. She likes crazy things so do I but I didnt understand what she want from me. She took advantage and I felt like I should do everthing she said to me in order to be with her but it didn’t wr broke up for the second time. I love her to death. When we spilt up for the first time I begged her to be with me and she accepted but the things didnt changed. She is in the same school as me we have the same friends, but I decided not to talk with her until she text me or do smth to get me back.I put NC for 1 month and I spotted a wall post in her fb saying that “The world is round and I am in love with you ” What she meat by that. I dont know what to do I dont speak to her and her friends too. Im alone and depressed. What to do?

admin

January 23, 2015 at 4:16 pm

Have you seen my other site, Ex Girlfriend Recovery?

Kiki

January 22, 2015 at 2:41 am

My boyfriend and I have not officially broken up, we had a little situation where we ended up not talking and he is mad at me because another situation that had nothing to do with me. So we are currently not speaking. I feel very lonely and sad because we aren’t talking. I also feel the urge to text him but i don’t want him to feel like he has power over me. I really don’t know what to do at this point. Can you please help me?!

admin

January 22, 2015 at 5:01 pm

Have you tried reaching out to him at all?

Mary

December 30, 2014 at 1:27 am

Okay so me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 years and we’re engaged up until a month ago he decided he was not ready. About 4 months ago I found a letter to another girl that he I guess had fallen for. But he never gave it to her and totally shut her out of his life. We decided we were not ready to live together so we moved out and I am in florida for the month. While here I met up with an old friend who use to have very open feelings for me but I never let that bother me and he said he had no problem with me spending a day with him while here. The man did a few things that my boyfriend had felt “crossed the line” and called me demanding that I give him the man’s number I refused because I wanted him first to calm down. He then said “give me the number or we are over” so I told him that I guess we are over. He then hung up and I then sent him the number but he said that I was too late. He sent me a picture of the Christmas present I just made him ripped into pieces. He said he wants no contact with me we are done and that’s that. He feels as tho I chose the other man over him but that is not what I meant and I can’t get him to understand that. What should I do? I want to be with him more than anything but I think he hates me now? I’d it worth trying? I’ve tried talking to him but he doesn’t answer me anymore. He has no social media and for the past 3 weeks I have been in a different stated 900 miles away as well as I will be for the next two weeks. Please help me understand what I should do. I don’t want things to be over because of such a petty fight.

admin

January 5, 2015 at 2:39 pm

How long had you been engaged for?

Christina

December 15, 2014 at 9:01 pm

My boyfriend broke up with me yesterday. We were living together for a few months after being together for a year and a half. We had a few arguments over this time where he had almost left a few times. This time, he actually gathered his stuff and told me not to contact him. I lied to him about contacting people he told me not to. (One girl and guy who live in different states that I play online games with) He went through my email and found my chats with them. I let him go unlike our usual fights of me trying to get him to stay and I texted him that I would change while he’s gone so that he could come back. I feel very guilty for lying and I would never make that mistake again. I was just absolutely terrified of him leaving and me lying made it worse. How can I earn his trust back while he’s away from me? Is it possible? Do you think doing no contact will help him consider coming back to try and fix it or will he forget me during the time apart?

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1,518 thoughts on “Making Your Ex Boyfriend Speak To You Again”