How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend To Speak To You- Get Him Talking Again

1,518 thoughts on “Making Your Ex Boyfriend Speak To You Again”

Meh

May 20, 2014 at 12:23 am

I screwed up pretty bad, I was immature in that I was jealous and insecure (not the crazy kind though) but enough to cause some problems. We had an argument and I left him. A few weeks later I realized that I made a huge mistake and now it’s been 2 months of off and on contact trying to get him back. Should I give up at this point? He seems really hurt, he says he misses me and loves me but doesn’t know if he can forget the bad things that happened between us. Ive heard from mutual friends that he isn’t looking for anyone and that he doesn’t go out much… Any thoughts?

admin

May 20, 2014 at 9:15 pm

Only if you determine that he isn’t worth your time.

Jennifer A.

May 16, 2014 at 1:07 am

I meet RB at work, were both working in the facility. The first time i saw him, i already like him and i can feel the same from him. RB is married but him and his wife is not in good term anymore, they are together just for the sake of his 3 kids. He asked me to go out with him and we did go out taking pictures, as he loves photography. On the second time we went out, we ended up in bed together, we didn’t plan it, we are not in relationship when it happened. It didn’t only happened once but many times i slept with him.
Three days ago, we both working and were okay, he is so sweet, we hug and kiss when we have a chance, we plan to go home together after work.For all this times were together I didn’t tell him that I am living with other man, and that evening were working together the man that i’m living with wants to pick me up from work, he overheard that the other man wants to pick me up, i told him, that my friends want to pick me up, i didn’t tell him that were living together, since I know that his married and he told me that i can go out with a guy as long that i will let him know. My living partner pick me up and we went home. All that time I am lying to RB that i am living with other man, i told him i lived with my grandma’s place. I texted him saying that i’m already home, and he texted me saying “you just got home” that was almost 12 midnight. He textede me too that he got a feeling that the guy picked me up and i living together, he wants me to be honest with him and better told him because if i he find out himself his not going to talk to me anymore. I decided to tell him
the truth. I didn’t replied to his text right away as i am composing my confession to him that i am living with the guy. Then he just texted me again saying “goodbye Jen, take care of yourself” i sent him the text that i composed for him, and when i read the text he sent me saying goodbye i replied to it saying that i am hurt he just left me without hearing my explanation why i did it and i just accept the break up and told him goodbye and i applogize for lying to him. He didn’t replied to my text until almost 11am i got a miss called from
Him twice but didn’t return his calls, i texted him later that day at work saying sorry and don’t mean to ignore his calls and i apologize again for lying to him, he replied “everything all about you is nothing but lies” i respond to his text but he didn’t replied anymore. I did text him again the day after that he didn’t reply to me i texted him that i missed him and i accept and deserve that he will not forgive me by lying at him, he didn’t reply to all my text to him since then. I understand his so angry with me.
Is no contact rule will apply to my situation? Do you think he still going to talk to me again because when we see each other later that day after he said goodbye to me, he totally ignore me and shows his body language that he hates me 🙁 i regret by lying to him
What should i do now? Please help me, i really do love RB, the guy i am living now is abusive and i want to move out from him.
Please do help me, i really need your help Chris. Thank you in advance, hope to hear from you soon..

Jenny

admin

May 20, 2014 at 5:55 pm

Well, get rid of the guy and abusive relationship you are currently in first.
Jennifer A.

May 16, 2014 at 1:20 am

By the way were working togther in the facility so we see each other when i schedule to work, is NC still work with our situation? Pls do advise. Thanks.
Jennifer A.

May 16, 2014 at 1:38 am

Is it okay if I will return all the stuff that he gave me? I am thinking of putting it all inside the paper bag and left in the staff room table with his name on it. Is that okay to do so?

Candace

May 14, 2014 at 3:13 pm

I really need some advice. My ex and I broke up and we tried to remain friends but because I still had romantic feelings for him it was difficult. I told him that it was difficult and I needed some time. He said that he loved me and that I was the perfect girlfriend but he just wants to be friends. Again, I reminded him that I need time and he stop talking to me completely. Will the NC rule work in my case alone? Or should I try something in addition?
Amanda S

May 12, 2014 at 6:59 am

Me and my ex boyfriend broke up two months ago. And. Haven’t talked since, he started dating this other girl. A week after we broke up? I asked him if he felt the same way for her as he did for me when he met me and he said nothing. Just silence. She is not even as attractive as I am so I don’t get it. She doesn’t even drive.
I want to know How to possibly get him back?

admin

May 12, 2014 at 6:44 pm

Did he know the girl while you were dating?

Bubbles

May 12, 2014 at 4:53 am

Hi, I’m in a situation and i really need your advice. On Tuesday (6th may 2014) my boyfriend left for work and sent me a message before he left on Skype saying that he loves me and to have a great day. We are in a long distance relationship atm. We had a disagreement two days before where he did not contact me for almost a day but then later did, saying that he missed me. I actually did not have a problem with this because he was with his best friend all day but i stopped to think if it was necessary to be upset about it or not. He was asking me if i was upset with him for that and i did not answer because i was unsure then i decided it would be silly to be upset over this so i answered him, only to realize he hung up a couple seconds before, typed that he was going to bed and changed his Skype status to do not disturb. Eventually he called me back and we talked and i apologized for not answering him and for upsetting him, because i did not mean to but i understand why he got mad. I also asked him to please not put his Skype on do not disturb and just leave because i would be willing to work it out, which i guess was my mistake? I believe this made him feel as if I was trying to blame him or avoid blame by saying this and by saying that i was ‘thinking’. Then after he came home from work on tuesday, he did not want to answer my skype calls and had not responded to any of my messages, but he was posting on facebook and livestreaming as well i guess to let me know that he was there but was ignoring me. He didnt talk to me the next day either and i only sent him one message on skype. Four days has passed and he has never responded to me. He did not change our relationship status on fb or anything on skype. I thought he was upset about his job or something. I have finals going on atm and i am very emotional about the situation, to the point that i would constantly open fb and skype to check if he has responded to me and my best friend decicded that it would be best if i delete him on skype and unfriend him on fb and just try to focus on my work instead of obsessing about him and crying every time i see his picture. He still has not contacted me in any way and i had no idea why this was happening until yesterday when he told his brother that if i asked, to tell me that it was my fault that this is happening because i don’t accept blame when anything happens and that it was annoying. I didn’t realize that i was doing this which made me think about it and i could understand why that would be bothersome. I am most definitely willing to pay attention to the way that i put across these things because i would not want him to feel this way since i don’t actually think anything is is his fault. I just wanted us to let each other know what the best way of dealing with situations with each other was. I really want to send him a message saying that im sorry i made him feel that way and that i dont hate him or anything and the reason i unfriended him etc. But i just have no idea what i should do. I love him, more than anything and i want it to work but i dont know if he is even ever going to speak to me again. In the past he has broken up with me once because he was frustrated with him being laid off but he apologized the next day and we worked it out. I just dont know what to do, at all. I dont know if i probably doomed our relationship by deleting him on skype and fb. Im sorry for the long essay but i’m hurting and i really need your perspective. Thank you.

admin

May 12, 2014 at 6:41 pm

Have you done NC or anything recommended on this site yet?
Bubbles

May 12, 2014 at 9:43 pm

Thank you for responding! Well this happened last Tuesday and the last message I sent him was a single line asking him if he was ok and that was Wednesday night. I removed him from Skype and fb on Friday because i absolutely could not focus on my work. I have not contacted him at all. After reading a bit more on your site, talking to some friends and a whole lot of self reflection, i have realized that everything i am focusing on is HIM. You have really opened my eyes and for that I thank you sincerely. I do love him, miss him and wish we could have worked it out because we always did before but this time i guess he is dealing with the situation differently. I’m 26 and he is 21 so maybe I should have expected it but it took me by surprise that he would just not talk to me at all. I don’t know if deleting him will deter him from contacting me or not (he is the very stubborn type) but honestly it has helped me focus and calm down. If he does come back, we can be stronger and def work it out but if he doesn’t, at least I am realizing more and more how valuable of a person i am each day…I may not be perfect but I’m a catch! Somewhere along the way of our relationship i forgot my strength and my worth because i was weak in the knees for him. I have too much work to get done for my future’s sake to deal with the silent treatment type drama i guess. I don’t intend to contact him atm but was I wrong to delete him? I don’t know if it made me seem petty or like i absolutely hate him because in fact i did it to force myself to not check every 2 mins if he messaged me and to not just break down and spam msg him lol. Any input would be greatly appreciated! Thanks! You gave me clarity when I was just about to break. I wish you all the success in the world, and I will follow and support your endeavors.

Grace

April 29, 2014 at 12:27 pm

So I ended up texting him before the 60 days and butt dialed him accidentally. I didn’t say anything bad just basically said I just wanted to try one more time. I promise I won’t again but you think if I go back on the 60 day rule it will still work. I still really miss the guy. He’s just so mad at me. I feel like he’s being stubborn and wants to make me suffer help please if I stop texting can the 60 day rule still work???? Thank you. Will he miss me??

admin

April 30, 2014 at 1:24 am

I think the fact that he wants to make you suffer means he kind of does miss you on some weird level.
Grace

April 30, 2014 at 4:25 am

I think so too. Thanks. Prob by the time I hear from him gonna be pissed and over it. Always is how it works. Thanks for being nice and helping.

Just need some advice

April 23, 2014 at 7:30 pm

my ex and me meet yesterday he text me and I text bck but didn’t respond
lily

April 20, 2014 at 7:22 am

Well I don’t know. He says he isn’t dating her “yet” but he posts about her making his night. And that she’s amazing or whatever. But he knows I’m talking to this new guy. Like going on dates.
Sue

April 19, 2014 at 4:26 pm

Hi Chris,
So this isn’t 100% about getting my ex back. What i really want is just for him to talk to me. When we were together love was never brought up until the end. When he ended it, he said that he could never love me and doesn’t see a future with me and that he just wants to be friends. Before we had dated for 7 months, we were friends for about 10 yrs. He also said that he knew i was falling in love with him, and so didn’t want to lead me on. After the breakup i txted him a few times, but he stopped responding. Then i went 30 days NC and sent out a “You are not going to believe what i just saw txt..no response 🙁
So i guess what im confused about is if he never loved me or anything why is he trying so hard to ignore me? He also hasn’t played his favorite game in the whole world since he broke up with me, which we used to play together all the time. (i know cause it shows when he was last online.) I would think by now since its been almost 2 months and that he doesn’t have strong feelings for me that he would be fine and ok with talking with me. We were two totally different people and i do agree we weren’t the greatest together, but even after all that i don’t want to lose him as a friend.

admin

April 20, 2014 at 3:46 am

Just fo rhim to talk to you huh?

Well, did you read any of the clever texts to get him respond to you?

lily

April 19, 2014 at 9:30 am

I mean I don’t know. He said that He’s “so happy right now and he doesn’t want anyone f*cking it up.” How does that mean upset? And he’s the one who left me.

admin

April 20, 2014 at 3:33 am

Sorry I kind of lost the context here.

He has a new girlfriend now? Is that why hes so happy? Or is he just putting on a front of being happy?

kisha

April 18, 2014 at 8:30 pm

Hi. I need help. I read the article and loved it. My boyfriend and I had a small argument yesterday. I feel he is distant. so I asked him if he was interested in someone else. He said no. But I guess I kept pushing the issue and he told me to chill and called me a psycho. I felt disrespected and stopped txtn him. I want to give him space to calm down. But now I want to talk to him again. I just don’t know what to say or if it’s even right to talk yet. We have been dating like a week but I do like him and want to get passed this I just feel stuck. Please help. Thanks.

admin

April 20, 2014 at 3:28 am

After a week what worries you about him being interested in someone else?

lily

April 18, 2014 at 8:19 am

Hi. Its been about a month no contact. He’s talking to his ex. He liked her. A lot. Has now blocked me on facebook. Yesterday posted about me saying he was stupid for being when me and not his ex. Saying he screwed up. And then today blocked me and apperantly talked about me to some people and posted about me that I’m not on his hate people forever list. He posted saying that he hates “her”. And telling his close friends even his ex things that make me look like I was the worst girlfriend ever. He said to someone that what we had was never real, that whatbhe has right now (with his ex) is real. (*but not even two months ago he “loved me so much”)
And wow. Yeah. Im hurt. From another persons opinion: “how can he say that like- especially right after how you guys were (how he was all in love and talked about it saying he never felt like this before, and trust me it was believable because he’s never done things like this or acted or showed his love like that to anyone else).”

admin

April 18, 2014 at 3:51 pm

He is very hurt by the breakup. Don’t let what he says get to you.
lily

April 18, 2014 at 8:19 am

Likes *
lily

April 18, 2014 at 8:23 am

*that I’m on his hate people list forever now

Sue

April 15, 2014 at 8:50 pm

What to do if ex boyfriend changes his number during the no contact period

admin

April 16, 2014 at 4:15 pm

How do you know he changed his number?

Hannan

April 14, 2014 at 3:48 pm

Hello,
I need your help. I screwed thing up BAD with my A. He is very done and everyone is telling me to move on but I can’t. I screwed this up out of callousness and immaturity. I left him for a previous shitty ex and I was mean. I have since then realized how bad of a choice this was and woke up to see the problems were me. I’ve been addressing those and doing some personal growth but I don’t want to let A go.. I screwed this up and made him feel screwed up and unwanted. The guilt I have is so heavy and A won’t talk to me. He waited long enough for me to get my shit together and I didn’t. I was a week too late and now he says we are not right for each other and he is seeing someone new. Not a new gf but it could get there any day. She is not competition but he WON’T write back at all. I’ve addressed my issues, apologies, begged, said goodbye. What do I do?? I know, the NC rule but what else? I am no where near 30 days yet but I don’t want to lose him for good. I was the mistake and I am slowly fixing myself. Please help me right this wrong. He is amazing, I was just too dumb and mean to see it when I should have..

Hannan

April 14, 2014 at 5:08 pm

Also, what if when I send the text message after the 30 days he has already erased my number?

“I have a confession to make..”
“Who is this?”

How does that tie into your waiting an hour and picking a confession?
He hates me for what I did. Says he wants nothing to do with me, I ak toxic. Not defending myself at all, I very much was but I am changing.
admin

April 15, 2014 at 4:07 pm

What do you mean? Has he erased your number?
Hannan

April 15, 2014 at 4:31 pm

Chris,
I mean that what if after the NC, he has erased my number. How do I do the confession thing if he responds with “Who is this?”. For now he still has it because I have just started the NC though.
What about my post about his Fb comment, what do you think?
Hannan

April 15, 2014 at 3:49 pm

I know you are busy but I need your advice now. He is putting up more pictures of him and this classlass gal. He is going to get close with her even if she is a rebound and this NC month will make me even more forgotten. I love him and he loved me. It was my fault he even had to rebound. He tried to get me back, even told me this girl isn’t enough but I was still being numb and horrible to him. What do I do Chris? He gave up on me and now I am back to the amazing girl at the beach and I am making strides every day to change so it goes all the way through and it is just too late? I can’t lose him forever. I miss him and this guilt is too much. I know this is 100% my fault. He was perfect and I was a bitch who didn’t appreciate him because of a shitty ex. I realize now this ex meant nothing, just a way to finally get over the past but now A is gone forever and just thinks that it didn’t work out with the jerk so I am just going back to him. It looks that way but deep down I miss him and realize how much I screwed up.
Hannan

April 15, 2014 at 4:28 pm

Oh, and we are not friends on Fb but we can still see some of A’s posts and last night he posted “Silence is better than bullshit.” I don’t know if that is about me but it sounds like it is.. Negative because he thinks everything I’ve sent is bullshit (I have just started the NC), but positive because he is still thinking of me right?

Salma

April 14, 2014 at 1:05 am

Heey sorry but can you give me an exemple what to say after he answer about confession cause i need to get attention and when he answered should i say i need to go now talk to ya later and let him contact me again is it work ?? and please give me an exemple <3 Thanks cause i really have a complicated story

admin

April 14, 2014 at 5:32 pm

I have a confession to make…

What is it?

I saw someone who looked like you today and called out your name.

Ann

April 13, 2014 at 10:15 am

Hi

I am glad I came across your website. I am finding all your advice here very helpful. I did the No Contact for over 30 days. Thinking I wasn’t interested in him anymore. Then guess what? Last Thurs, he turns up in my dance class. What does that mean? I felt really awkward when we both faced each other, he said hi with a sad face and I just replied with the just an “ohh” and a sort of disappointed look on my face and turned my back. So I sort of ignored him. But after the class I must admit, I should have asked him how he was going but I didn’t want to make the first move to talk to him. What do I do? Now I realize, hmm maybe I want him back.

Ann

April 15, 2014 at 4:27 pm

Yes I do want him back 🙁
What do I do? I feel nervous thinking I am going to see him again on Thurs.

lily

April 11, 2014 at 7:30 am

That’s okay. I see all the people you are replying to including me trying to help us all and I would like to take this moment to appreciate you. I can tell its a hassle and its hard and you are using your time to help us. Thank you. It really really does mean a lot. More than you think. Thank you.

admin

April 12, 2014 at 3:47 pm

Wow, thank you so much. I really needed that.

nan

April 10, 2014 at 8:52 pm

my ex and i broke up a month ago. he then started seeing someone else 2 weeks after and i freaked out and went kinda crazy. I called him many times, his friends and even his new gf. I was super hurt, freaking out and wasn’t myself. I really regret all of that now but i think it may be too late. Last time we talked he told me he doesn’t want me to talk to him ever again, and that everyone around him thinks I’m a psycho. Is there anything i can do to make this better? i really don’t want him to see me as the crazy ex forever. I haven’t contacted him for a week already and plan not to. I really regret everything i did post break-up as it ruined everything.

Before our break-up my ex used to think highly of me. He has always been really proud with the fact that all his friends would say I’m pretty and the hottest girl he ever dated. I’m also very academically successful and he would always tell me how proud he was of me. But since i’ve done all the crazy stuff after our break-up, he really thinks lowly of me and i feel as though he is even disgusted by me. He told me to leave him alone and never contact him again. He also seems to be really in love with his new gf.

Is there anything i can do to make him forgive me? Or at least erase all the image of the crazy ex i acted? How long should i keep NC in this case? I feel so bad about all of this.

Thanks Chris.

admin

April 11, 2014 at 4:15 am

Just give it time… time is your friend here.

I know you acted a tad out of character and deep down he probably knows that.

sarah

April 10, 2014 at 8:21 pm

Hi Chris,

Its so nice of you to help us out like this!

My boyfriend and I dated 3.5 and lived together most of the time. I even took a year off school with him to live in his hometown, buffalo ny. we returned to school in vermont after that.
he broke up with me exactly a month ago and a day ago. The first few days, I didn’t leave him alone. After that, I left him alone only texting him here and there when he asked me a question. Yesterday after it had been a month of being broken up, I texted him “hey how are you?” and he didn’t reply. Honestly I thought he would. I’m concerned because he is supposed to be graduating college in May (it’s april 10th now) and moving 8 hours away back to his home town., buffalo. i still have a year left of school to finish. I miss him terribly and I have written him a letter. I haven’t given it to him yet because he won’t reply to me. what do I do? again I don’t have TIME to not contact him because he’s moving!

a little about our relationship:
he was my best friend, my home, my family, my puzzle piece and my muffin. yes, we used to fight but i’ve figured out that the main reason was because i would always complain and nag. it was truly my fault. I’ve apologized for that in the letter i’ve composed…
he still has some of my things in his storage, like my tv and things like that. he always owes me $500….

again the problem is, he is moving away in a month and a half, so i don’t have time to do the no contact thing. i really love him and don’t want to lose him. what should i do next?

admin

April 11, 2014 at 4:12 am

Your muffin?

Sorry that kind of made me laugh.

Maybe you can try NC for a week.
sarah

April 11, 2014 at 5:45 pm

yeah muffin was our nickname to each other. last night, i held hands with another guy and my ex walked by us and saw, we pretended like we didn’t even know each other…
admin

April 12, 2014 at 3:36 pm

I am sure that had an affect on him.

lily

April 9, 2014 at 9:59 pm

So nothing I can do? Is what you’re saying?..

admin

April 10, 2014 at 1:19 am

Didn’t say that. There is always something you can do.

Look, here is the real issue. I try to get to everyone but I am unable to give everyone the advice that they deserve. It annoys me more than you because I know you guys want more from me but I literally can’t give much more.

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1,518 thoughts on “Making Your Ex Boyfriend Speak To You Again”