The Simple 2 Step Method To Get Your "Baby Daddy" Back

392 thoughts on “Here’s How To Get Your “Baby Daddy” Back”

Elle

September 4, 2021 at 10:10 am

Hello! I am currently 16 weeks pregnant, my ex tried to have me get an abortion but I didn’t want to so he ended things with me and told me he was not ready to be a parent and needed to go to therapy because of it. he has been telling all of our friends that I am selfish and I am the reason he needs to go to therapy and he wants nothing to do with me or the baby. do you think he will ever reach out? I haven’t reached out to him after he said he would rather d*e than to be a dad… I feel like our friends tell him about me and what i’m doing etc and he just tells them to block any communication with me and just painted a horrible picture of me. should I reach out to him once the baby is born or do you think he will try to reach out?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 9, 2021 at 10:21 pm

Hi Elle, I would suggest that you avoid reaching out by his reaction. Just focus on you and your baby and make sure that the baby is born into a happy toxic free environment, if he wants to be there, or involved he will come to you.

Blessing

September 1, 2021 at 11:31 am

We dated (my ex and me) for 7 years and have a son the problem is the he is too much of a mama boy and even broke up with me to go back and live with his mum.Is there any hope even though the mum definitely doesn’t want me in her son’s life.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 1, 2021 at 9:54 pm

Hey there, so the reason for him ending things with you and moving out is that he didn’t want to be with you? Or that he wanted to move back with his mother?

Bree

September 1, 2021 at 2:21 am

Me and my daughter’s dad weren’t actually officially together – we were more “friends with benefits” with both of us ending up catching feelings. Things got kinda bad and we both decided to end things only to find out two days later I was pregnant. He wasn’t around during the pregnancy and came around a couple days before our daughter turned a month old. She’s 2.5 months old now. I admit I do still have feeling for him. What chance , if any , do I have of getting my daughter’s dad back ?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 1, 2021 at 9:55 pm

Hi Bree, if you have not done so yet. I would suggest that you explain the situation, how you are feeling and that you would like to see if things could progress into a real relationship but also take it slow to build a real foundation this time around.

Anonymous

August 11, 2021 at 12:09 am

My baby dad and I were together on and off for a few years and we have a 7yr old special needs child together. The past 2 years have been pretty bad between us. We broke up right before the pandemic started and he got with this new gf. He basically left me for her. So we stopped speaking for almost a year and I started dating other ppl while he was in his year long toxic relationship with this girl. We recently met up back in June to talk and hash things out. The convo went well, there were a lot of tears and emotions on both our behalf’s and we vowed to move forward into a better space for our son. At the time he mentioned he was single. From that point on we’ve been getting been along and talking more and hanging out. Of course we had a few slip ups and now my feelings are back. However he mentioned that he didn’t wanna relationship right now and that he is working on himself. He had just got out of a very bad relationship with the girl he left me for so he said he needed time to heal from that. But he did mention he was currently dating. I said ok and I made it known that I was not going to be his friend with benefits. Things got weird because he would come over and we would spend time together as one big happy family and we would sleep together. We recently got into a big argument because I felt like he was as using me and not really wanting anything serious. He said that he never changed his mind about wanting a relationship, he still wants a to be single and that i shouldn’t be questioning him like I’m his gf. We haven’t spoken in a few days and then he finally calls to apologize for the things he said and he mentioned that he was wrong for his actions. He suggested that we focus on being friends to avoid any more issues because he feels like whenever we are on a good path, sex always cause issues between us so he wants a friendship without sex. He said that as we build a stronger friendship then that could possibly lead to us being together again. Did I mention he pulled a stunt like this in the past? Idk what to do. Idk if I can agree to be friends after this situation. I feel used. I can’t just flip a switch and go back to being best friends like we were. But I do love him and want to be a family. Should I move on?
A
Kelly

July 21, 2021 at 9:54 am

My child’s father has a girlfriend but we have slept together a few times and he now wants to do things with our 11 year old together?
He knows I’m in love with him and he has told me that he has always loved me and thinks of me every day!
So why won’t he leave her!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

August 6, 2021 at 11:32 pm

Hi Kelly, you need to stop sleeping with him and refuse to spend time with him and your daughter together as a family, unless he ends things with the girl or you stop your sexual relationship and accept just friendship. I would also suggest that you explain to him that you will not be a causal fling you either want a serious relationship or nothing as it is unfair to your daughter getting caught up in your situation and getting hurt too.

Jeniffer kim

July 2, 2021 at 9:23 am

Jenniffer here, i am 9 months pregnant and almost about to deliver i broke up with my babydaddy 1month n a week ago and he left me for his ex who they had dated for 3½years he says he broke up with me because i involved my mom in our relationship but the truth is he did it to go back to his ex, i tried to apologize but he was so rude to me so i started the no contact rule for a whole month now, he has never texted me and i think he deleted my number, how can i get him back because i still love him so much and do you think its wise for me to contact him once his child is born so that he can see his son??..please help

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

July 3, 2021 at 9:32 pm

Hi Jennifer, yes you need to make him aware that his child is born and that you are willing to let him visit / have access if that is what you agreed. I would suggest that considering how you feel about him that you be sure that you have emotional support there for you in the early days so that you do not beg / ask him back etc. You need to work on yourself a little and follow the limited no contact rule for 45 days and then start the program as Chris explains in his articles and videos.

Ann rose

June 28, 2021 at 6:55 am

Hi..we got back together with my baby daddy after 7 long years 3 weeks ago, one weekend he went out with his buddies and on monday he said i was discussing him with one of them and i even slept with him which was a lie and not the case..he stopped communicating once again..and he communicated with his daughter instead for awhile.
..am wondering what’s going on in his mind? Our daughter was supposed to join grade one soon..is he avoiding that responsibility? He has another woman in another state with his child, have they gotten back together? I have lots of questions i need answers but am doing the no contact rule now..it has been 3 days since we spoken.
Jacky

April 16, 2021 at 5:02 pm

I met my baby daddy at the bank and after a week we started dating, I was leaving in another town and so we had a long distance relationship which means he was the one to visit me on weekends. Little did I know that he was married with a kid. I realized this when I was two months pregnant and then confronted him,he didn’t give me a straight answer and assumed the question. Afterwards he changed a lot, we barely communicated but he provided for the baby until recently when he started ignoring my texts and calls. When I asked him all about it he told me that I can’t force love… that I’m too much on him. I cried all night and after googling found the ex boyfriend recovery article and I started the no contact rule, I have been on it for 8 days now. On day 3 of the no contact he texted me but I ignored it. Please advise me on this one. It’s so sad for me.
Unknown source

April 16, 2021 at 3:12 am

My BD left me preg at 4mos. He moved states. And wanted a long distance. I didnt. I was angry and hurt.
5 mos went by. he didnt call ur check. Even when i delivered our son. I had to call him. No help. Not a dime. He denied his son suddenly and said i cheated to escape responsibility.
This is both our first kid. I’m 35. Hes 46.

1 mo later I tried to get him to meet his son (I have prob 40x and get excuses) and meet up w him *hint hint * he denied me. I knew. He was seeing someone. Hes been with this woman since he left me preg. Now hes engaged to her and hasnt been together even a year.

He left me and his son to play house with her.
I’m taking him to court. I don’t trust him.

Is there any hope? He told me today hes engaged. I said congrats. Left it at that.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

April 18, 2021 at 7:23 pm

Hey there, if he is engaged it would be best for you to start thinking about moving on.

Amy

March 17, 2021 at 10:41 pm

So I’m currently 22 weeks pregnant and single… Been with my unborn baby daddy for 7 whole years, we were a perfect couple… Than last year we both decided to try and have a baby and we did. When I told him I was pregnant, he seemed like the happiest man a live. But than he’s behavior started changing he started being rude and uncaring with me. I wanted to abort the baby but he begged me not to, he said a child would strengthen our relationship and I decided to keep my baby as I also wanted it.

Than this year, January he broke up with me, that he thinks it’s best that we both stay separated. So that left me heartbroken, devastated and later learnt that he had moved on, seeing someone else. Do I have a chance of getting him back or should I just move on with my life? Last night we had a little chat and he asked me how his unborn baby is doing… Please help out

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 24, 2021 at 8:31 pm

Hi Amy so if you want to try and get your ex back or move on that is your call, I can advice you either way in what you decide. I would suggest that you take some time to work out what is going to be best for you and baby rather than you and him, and make sure that you are a happy Mamma before anything else as that is what is most important.

Sierra

February 21, 2021 at 6:26 am

I’m so happy I found this website. It’s helped a lot the last few days. My ex and I were together for almost
5 years. We have children together that are still in diapers. 2 months before he walked out on us we were having a rough time. I found out he was distant because he’d talking to other women and was starting to feel like he wanted out. I was beyond devastated but I said if he was planning on leaving he needed to do the right thing for me and our kids and just tell me. He said thats the last thought I should even have. I knew our relationship had been taken over by routine, parenting, chores and us never getting much of a break or time together. 2 months after that suddenly he’s leaving to move in with another woman. He went back and forth at first about us working on things and I made the gigantic mistake of begging him to come home to his family. For 3 weeks I’ve been no contact except about the kids and try to seem like I’m moving on. When he comes to see the kids he is either here at our house (the same house we lived in as a couple) or wants me to go if he takes the kids anywhere which I don’t understand because he now he acts like he’s moving on for good with her. Shes a late 40 something year old that works for him. I’m 29. I’ve been reading and listening to your podcasts but I’m still so worried I’ll eff everything up. Do I even have a chance at getting him to come home back home to his family?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 23, 2021 at 3:47 pm

Hi Sierra, so stop going with him if he wants to take the kids out somewhere, and if he stays in your house. Leave. Let him see what it is like to be a single parent without you around helping him! Let him feel that pressure! Stick with a limited no contact starting from today for 45 days. Work on yourself, do as much as you can with the Ungettable information. There is a chance you can get him back, but you need to make him realise you are not sat around waiting while he spends time with this other woman! Check this article out to give you some extra help – https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-back-when-you-have-a-child-with-them/

Cindy

February 20, 2021 at 5:52 pm

Hi there,
I just discovered this site and it is very informative. I have a situation. My baby daddy and I were together for a few months. I am now 6 weeks pregnant. When we met we hit is off amazing well. It seemed to good to be true. The perfect relationship. His family loves me. They told him dont lose this one. I have really strong feelings for him. As does for me as well, he constantly says “I love you”. The problem is he has 2 kids with his ex. Her and dont get along. I notice him and I get into an argument he goes to his ex and says he wants to spend time with his kids. Which I dont have an issue with. It’s her I dont trust. Also, I feel that he has an escape route to go to when we argue. I told him how I feel and he still keeps going there and its pissing me off. Now after I told him I was pregnant he said it’s up to me what to do with the baby. I told him I wanted his support at the appt and the delivery. But, he became distant and want to take things slow in the relationship. But, it’s so hard for me to use the no contact rule when I only live next door and I am friends with his mom. Actually I met his mom first a couple months before I knew of him. My feelings are really strong for him. I have an 11 year old daughter, her father is not in our lives at all. He has moved on and remarried. We have no communication at all. Now for my baby daddy #2. I dont want to go through alone AGAIN. I want us to work things out for the baby. I dont want to have another child with no father. I’m sorry but how is that going to look on me with 2 kids and no father. If this one doesnt work out. We have broken up 1 time and got back together 2 days after. Now i feel that i am losing him because of how much i am fighting to keep us together. Please help me figure this out. I would really appreciate the advise. Cause I really miss being with him.

Thank you

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 7, 2021 at 2:47 pm

Hi Cindy, so the worry you have about “how it’s going to look” there are many many people out there who are raising kids alone so try not to focus on that. Your focus needs to be that you and your children have a happy life. With or without a man! The main thing is that you work on yourself, and realise your worth. If he wanted to be with her, he would be with her. You need to understand that if you want to be with this man then she is going to be in his life full time until his children are grown. You want your relationship to work you have to let it go, as hard as it may be. You do not have to get along with her, but you also do not need to speak with her either. You say you’re losing him – so you are not broken up right now you just need to show you are secure and not needy or clingy.

Nympha

February 17, 2021 at 11:42 am

Hey guys am nympha, my ex and I have a 3months old baby…we broke up when I was still pregnant and he decided to be with his first baby mama…she foundout about me and his baby and has done her best to cut my child’s father off from me and the baby…I try my best to talk to him and he also talks to be but told me to give him time because of his first baby mama he claims she checks his phone and whenever she finds out he has contacted me or talked to me she has fights with him and in return he distances himself from me…so one time I asked him why he was distant from me and his daughter he told me he was being blackmailed by the woman and that because she was his first woman he bought assets and opened joint accounts and also have joint shares on everything he owns…he told me he was afraid to loose his assets and money and also his son whom he had with his first woman…actually he told me she threatened him using that as an excuse so due to his fear to loose his property and son he talks to me in secret and asks me not to call or text him and only wait for him to contact me…he also told me to give him time to figure things out and claims went he solved his issues he is going to come find me and his daughter…I really don’t know what to do…please advise me because I love him and want us to raise our daughter together what can I do????

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 19, 2021 at 12:25 pm

Hi Nympha, while I understand your situation is difficult. If he wanted to be in your childs life he would not let another person stop him. So while she has a part to play he is also to blame here. If he does not want to lose his access to his child and his “assets” then he should sort that himself so that he can spend time with BOTH his children, not just his son. Regardless of the other woman. Your daughter should not be missing out because he has a manipulating ex!

Ivy

February 16, 2021 at 5:21 pm

Hello,Ivy here,
So,my bd whom we’ve been together since 2016 recently told me he didn’t feel anything for me for those years we were together..everything was okay,until last year when he went to another city for work..He stayed there and I got to realise that ever since he went there,he met up this girl whom he told that he didn’t love me and that he used me to get over a heart break and that the pregnancy happened during that time..our baby will be 4yrs this year and he says that he loves the other lady and that me and him will never work out..he told the other everything about me and my baby and apparently,the other lady is the one pushing him to say that he will co parent..should I just let him be?!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 19, 2021 at 10:02 am

Hi Ivy, you need to follow the limited no contact rule where you only speak to him about your child otherwise I would not engage in any conversation with him. This needs to be for at least 45 days if you want him back then you need to read and learn about the being there method. Check out this article to help you along the way – https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-back-when-you-have-a-child-with-them/

Jasmine

February 11, 2021 at 9:09 pm

Hi my name is jasmine, and me and my baby daddy have a 2 month old and during my pregnancy he cheated on me and so we stop talking for a while and we started back . So he “moved on “ and he has a girlfriend now and so he thinks it’s okay to still talk to me and his girlfriend and so I felt like that wasn’t okay because he trying to have his cake and ice cream too. In the beginning I’ve gave him a chance for us to work on our relationship but he told me to wait and be patient until he’s ready so I wasn’t finna do that. So just recently something else had happened and so I told him that I wanted to stop talking to him because of what he did and he was upset when I said that I wanted us to stop talking. But cutting him off I felt was the right thing to do so my feelings won’t get hurt and even though I cut him off I still want us to be together and start back talking and try to be this family that I want us to be, but it’s like he won’t leave me alone but won’t cut her off, I know he wants to be with me (I think )but he won’t admit it ,but how can we move forward when he is still talking to his girlfriend? Or should I just completely move on and focus on me and my child and just forget about rekindling the relationship since he’s not willing to make it work?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 13, 2021 at 10:55 pm

Hi Jasmine, so in this situation he knows he has you both! You need to explain to him that you are not going to be in this situation anymore and that you are walking away, that’s when you follow a limited no contact (only speak to him when it is about your child) and then otherwise follow the rules of NC. If he has a girlfriend then coming to you too, you need to stick to your standards.

Georgia

January 28, 2021 at 2:33 am

My name’s Georgia and my bd broke it off with me after a 3 year relationship and I have our 5 month old son but like a dumbass I begged for him back and he said he needed to think about it what should I do

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 2, 2021 at 8:40 pm

Hi Georgia, you definitely are not “dumbass” it is totally normal for people to ask to get back together. You need to work on your self esteem for some time and stick with a limited no contact. Follow the program and use this if you still want to get your ex back after 30 days.

Alina Motaung

December 30, 2020 at 11:06 pm

Am Lina
I have been dating my baby daddy for almost 8 years now and it’s a long distance relationship,he started cheating with this girl 1 year back when i found out we almost broke up but somehow he mananged to convince me that they broke up with the girl recently i just found out that they still dating. Now he’s breaking up with me and he has chosen the girl he saying he’s afraid of hurting me again. The thing i still want to be with him so please advise

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 1, 2021 at 8:59 pm

Hi Alina, if you want this guy back then you are going to have to work on being ungettable while following the limited no contact period. Going forward when you start to reach out after 45 days you need to follow the program along with the being there method.

Asia Brooks-Smith

December 4, 2020 at 12:35 am

Hello my name is Asia and I need some advice. I want my sons father back and I read the article above and most of the things mentioned as far as the no contact and stuff I do. Here’s my dilemma… I told him two weeks ago how I felt after he left almost five years ago( for personal reasons). We didn’t really break up he just left because he wanted to better himself for his son. We haven’t spoken just general stuff about our son and that’s it. I don’t know if he has a girl or anything but I know during the time after he left he had two girlfriends but things didn’t work out. Currently he’s in Connecticut( still there to my knowledge). The problem is he’s moving back to New Jersey and is working on himself which I’m happy about because I want him to be the best version of his self and I know he’s a good dad. But I feel stuck because when I told him how I felt he was in a way surprised I guess given the whole time frame and how he just left. But he told me he appreciated me being honest, that I was a good mother and that maybe in the future we could possibly be together again but right now he wants to keep focusing on his self. It was a hard pill to swallow but I swallowed it. Since he left I’ve been on a few dates but always felt this guilt because I wanted him back(even though he was moving on as well). I just want to know should I keep the faith and wait patiently or should I completely just move on with my life? I’m truly stuck between a rock and a hard place

Side note: when we met I just turned 17 and he was 25. He already had one child but haven’t been with the mother since before the baby was born and I have his second child. I got pregnant unexpectedly before we reconnected and got together after I told him I was pregnant.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 6, 2021 at 10:10 pm

Hi Asia, I would say that you continue to try to move on while he works on himself as you do not know if in the end he will want to come back. However, you can follow the program and work on trying to get him back, while also living your life, if you meet someone you really like in the mean time great, if not then you can always approach him again.

Luna

December 2, 2020 at 2:39 pm

My Baby father decided that he doesn’t love me anymore after 10 years of being in a relationship with me. We are continuing to live together, because we both don’t have the money to move. My heart hurts, and he is already talking to someone new. I don’t know how to do this without him.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 2, 2020 at 5:03 pm

Hi Luna, it is hard to live with your ex when you share a child and want them back, but you need to follow the limited no contact rules and stick with it as best you can. Read articles on this website that relates to your situation and work on yourself in the mean time.

Omecca wilson

October 19, 2020 at 4:48 pm

I have been with my sons father since we were 19 we are now 22. When I met him he told me he was fighting a case. He had mom issues , out in the world on his own since 17. I took him in my home. We were together 4 months I got pregnant with our son and he went away when I was 8 weeks pregnant. I came to every visit pregnant made sure he was ok. 2 months after I had the baby I went out had some drinks with my friends saw my ex and I cheated. Then I cheated again 6 months later someone else. I just wanted my needs met. I was so tired of being alone. He found out broke up with me was really mean . I went through depression I ended up sleeping with my childhood friend when he came to my house to comfort me . My sons dad came back a month later asking for me back and he understands I was sad but he pushed me away when he found out the way he talked to me he never has and I didn’t know who he was. I was turned off. I continued seeing my friend and going out and for 3 months He begged . He got out of jail came home to be with me and ended up telling him about me and my guy friends affair when we broke up and he doesn’t want to be with me now. He lived with me , went out all hours of the night with girls I’m sure, disrespectful, always throwing stuff in my face . Now he’s coming home decent times , staying out the streets more but it’s still no commitment . He’s here and holds me every night. We go out with the baby , grocery shopping, he did our laundry the other day . I cook every night for him , I do not talk to other guys, I stay home with the baby when I am not at work. We were suppose to get married when he got out now he says he will never give me that or will never get married. And he says we are not together he does not want a relationship. We are still sexually active and living together . He says he loves me and kisses me everyday before going to work or leaving out but he’s just still not there. This is the same person that used to surprise me with gifts and flowers . Never had to question his loyalty or where I stood. Now I just don’t understand. I still love him I always have. I just want him back and committed to me again.

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392 thoughts on “Here’s How To Get Your “Baby Daddy” Back”