The Definitive Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back

8,582 thoughts on “The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

Kayla

November 12, 2013 at 11:15 pm

so my ex and i broke up about a week ago. We were fighting a lot but it wasnt aynthing i thought we couldnt handle. he’s been stressed out about his career and not making it, and the fighting made it worse. He said that his feelings for me had changed since we started dating, but he says he still loves me, cares for me and has feelings but doesnt think we work (Again, because of the fighting). what should I do ? i think it’s salvagable but he’s stubborn and I dont want to make the same mistakes

admin

November 13, 2013 at 7:08 pm

I think patience is key here. Have you done NC yet?
Kayla

November 13, 2013 at 8:13 pm

yeah, i havent talked to him in a week. i just dont know what he’s thinking or if he was speaking more out of anger. like i said, he’s so stubborn, so im afraid that even if he knows this is a mistake, he wont say anything.
Kayla

November 12, 2013 at 11:23 pm

we havent talked, aside from him wishing me a quick happy birthday over the weekend and me saying thank you. I forgot to mention that he also said he has been trying to let go and get over all the constant fights for a while now but he just can’t. Im assuming he’s probably felt this way for about a month.

Kessy

November 12, 2013 at 8:31 pm

Hello again,thanks so much for your sympathy. Do you think it’s my fault he wanted the time out?and one more thing while I got pregnant his mum Became ill.Yeah I have started the NC and it’s now a week and two days but do you think it’s worth the getting back or should I just move on with my life and if I should complete the NC do I wait till he contacts me or initiate the contact again.

admin

November 13, 2013 at 6:39 pm

Finish it and then contact him.

Georgia

November 12, 2013 at 7:01 pm

So my boyfriend and I broke up about 4 weeks ago, but it was a confusing break up. We dated for 9 months and during that time he gave me a necklace with 2 wedding rings on it, one being his uncles who had passed away and the other, his fathers first wedding ring. He told me that those are the rings (combined) he wanted to use when he got married and that, “he wanted me to be the one to give it back to him.” Well we started fighting id say 2 times a week over stupid things. But it was both of us, not just one or the other. Well we got in yet another dumb fight one night, where I left to go home and give us space, and he had left to go running instead of talking to me. So the next day I texted him wanting to meet up to express to him how I felt. We met up for two hours talking about us breaking up, but he still wanted us to talking be there for each other because we are each other’s best friends. He also wanted me to keep the rings for we would eventually get back together when he could handle his school situation and everything else going on in his life. By the way he is taking his prerequisites to be a PA. Well after the day we talked about us still being in contact but giving each other space, I waited a little bit then texted him something random that we usually would text about. A weird dream I had. You didn’t respond so I waited an entire week and I called him and asked if I could come talk to him at his house. He said yeah so I went there and we set outside his house talking about why he didn’t respond. His reasoning was that he was just too busy with school and forgot to respond after he saw it but he also apologized and said it wouldn’t happen again. So I would wait to hear from him but I text or call never came. I would randomly shop at his house every once a while before I knew you was leaving for class just to talk to him about my bad day and to ask how he was doing. You never minded when I dropped by. And it always ended in us both crying saying we missed and loved each other. The last time I stopped at his house out of the couple times I did, I was crying and asked do we have to do this forever? His response was I just don’t know. Only do know is that I love you but I have so much on my plate and I can’t have a girlfriend right now. So I responded to know how long this is going to take before you ready again? And he said to be honest I have no idea, i’m going to be in school for a very long time and it’s only going to get harder from here. so I asked him what the wedding rings meant then, why he wanted me to keep them? He said honestly I don’t want those messing with your head anymore you should give them back to me. So is upsetting as it was I cried and gave them back to him. The same day I saw him, while I was at his house, I broke down hearing everything he ever told me being taken back. And all he could do was give me a hug, cry, and tell me he was sorry. After that I waited a week, took all his stuff to his house, called him to come outside, and said my goodbye. I said I couldn’t wait around for someone who was unsure of when he could love me again, and he cried again, said he understood and how hard this was for him. So tell me what do you think I should do? He let me walk out of his life after that day, blocked me on Facebook, and ignores my friends or family that see him when they say hi. But I love him so much, and I know he’s the only person I want. I wanna get him back. I just don’t know what to do. He’s a real emotional guy. Help me 🙁

admin

November 13, 2013 at 6:28 pm

What have you done thus far? From the site and this page I mean? Have you tried any of the tactics.

sasha

November 12, 2013 at 3:44 pm

Hey… so I have a question. I had been with my ex for almost 2 and a half years and about 3 weeks ago he broke up with me. This is what happened though; for probably a better part of a year I have been so out of control with my controlling self. It got to the point where I was telling him who he could and couldn’t hang out with, I was checking his phone, his facebook, being what you call a text gnat. I was horrible. Well, two days before he broke up with me he just out of the blue stopped talking to me after we were having a completely innocent conversation. Wouldn’t answer anything I sent him or when I called him. So I called his work to see if he had worked that day (before we broke up) they said he hadn’t. So I started freaking out of course and my family started asking if maybe he was cheating and so I freaked out even more. Now ley me tell you… He live about 40 minutes away from where I live so it would be a little drastic just to drive there… But I did the next day at 9 at night and I tracked him down at work. I was so hurt that he ignored me and fueled by all the stupid thoughts running through my head that I got into an argument with him there and made a little bit of a scene… ok maybe a lot. I told him I would wait outside and we would continue the conversation when he was done with work. But when he was done he jumped in his car and drove off really fast. About a half hour later he texts me saying that he couldn’t handle everything anymore and he was just done and wished me the best. I stupidly tried to beg for him back and he said no numerous times and I just left it at that. Then a couple of days later I tried again to apologize and beg for him back and he said his decision was final. So after that text I left him alone. He unfriend me on everything and hasn’t talked to me nor I him. I have been in nc for almost 2 and a half weeks now and it has really given me time to think about who I am what I have done and what I need to do to be better. He is the person I love Chris. The only person I can ever see my self with for forever. My confidence and insecurities and stress got in the way and tore everything down around me. In my nc time I’ve started going to the gym and hanging out with my friends again building up my self confidence. I’ve stopped checking on him and started on fixing who I am. I know what I did was wrong and that I was horrible, but I’ve figured out that I’m not a bad person I just made a really big mistake. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want him back. I want him back badly. He still hasn’t taken the pictures of us off of his facebook as of the last time I checked (like a week ago) and he hasn’t asked me to come pick up my stuff at his house yet either. Do you think he will forgive me? Do you think it’s a good sign he hasn’t asked me to pick up my stuff yet? I know he’s stubborn and he’s angry and hurt, when something hurts him or makes him mad he stews about it and pushes everyone away. What do you think? What should I do?

admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:48 pm

I think he can forgive you for sure.

Are you doing anything like NC?
sasha

November 12, 2013 at 9:15 pm

Yeah I initiated the nc two and a half weeks ago. This is however the second time we have been broken up, does that lessen my chances?
admin

November 13, 2013 at 6:45 pm

A little bit but its still possible.

Krissy

November 12, 2013 at 10:48 am

Chris,

My ex and I were together off and on for the past few years. During our relationship we went through quite a few horrible life changing events. After everything we have been through he randomly doesn’t want to be with me and says that he wants to see what else is out there. After everything we have been through it is hard for me to grasp the fact that he would throw away everything we’ve been through. We had marriage plans and all. I am going to try the NC however we work together so he is always around. What can I do to remain in NC but still talk to him when I have to, which is all the time?

admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:31 pm

I bleieve we call that limited contact.

Sabrina

November 12, 2013 at 8:22 am

Good day i was in a 4 year relationship with my ex boyfriend, im a type of girl who has a break up/make up attitude, he got fed up and after i told him i want to break up with him (no apparent reason) the next day he was already courting a girl and its 2weeks they are together now. I told him why did you do it? He always say i don’t know. And i gave him a video of me about 100 reasons why i love him. And then he started to talked, that i never appreciated what he does for me. And he said “give me time” “maybe I’m just confused ” “what would i tell my new girlfriend, that i just want to break up with here with no reason?” “We can be friends” but i can sense he still loves me because i didn’t contacted him for 3 days and he told me you only gave me 3 days to think. What should I do? I know his new girl is just a rebound- and the girl is totally the opposite of what he likes.

admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:22 pm

NC rule seems ideal here.
sabrina

November 13, 2013 at 9:31 am

Yes I will do that that NC rule. what does he mean by “give me time”?
admin

November 13, 2013 at 8:08 pm

It means he wants you to give him time hahahahaha.
Sabrina

November 16, 2013 at 1:16 am

Why wont he break up with the girl? Do men want a valid reason to break up with a rebound? And not by just telling that im still love my ex? He told me “what im going to say to my new gf that i just want to break up with her?, just give me time. “
admin

November 16, 2013 at 9:39 pm

Men like their options. They want the option of sleeping with two girls at once ptentially…
Sabrina

November 19, 2013 at 12:00 am

Hi! Did the NC for a week, then weakness got the best of me, i just wanted to clarify one thing so i grabbed my phone and txted him. i txted him that we need to talk then he responded by “i told you everything, theres nothing to talk about”. I dunno if he acted that way because he found out that i was going out of the country for work, he found that info from his mom and he kept on asking his mom if its true and when i was leaving. And he is always asking his mom if we are still communicating. also became distant to his family as well when he started dating his new gf too. He’s not the guy we knew. Is he confused??
admin

November 19, 2013 at 6:35 pm

He may be. YOu probably shouldn’t have broken NC…
Sabrina

December 3, 2013 at 2:37 pm

Now the agency is asking me if i wanted to still pursue working outside the country. Its a big decision but i dont want to go because of the possibility that my ex and i could be together. Thus i think this the reason why he looked for someone new having the thought that i will be away and thinking im going to leave him
Sabrina

December 4, 2013 at 4:41 pm

I was with her mom today, she mentioned that he is asking if i was at their house, what time and when. And also he got pissed off when his brother opened the perfume that i gave to him, and now he always brings it wherever he goes.. Is that a good sign??
Sabrina

November 24, 2013 at 8:46 am

My ex boyfriend keep telling me that he isnt serious with his new gf, he’s not that happy, if he could turn back time he wouldn’t courted her, he doesn’t love her. he courted her after we broke up. Is this a assurance that he wants to get back together?
Sabrina

December 2, 2013 at 10:27 pm

Hey chris good day! My ex’s mother and I were talking yesterday, and she mentioned that my ex said “im trying to see if this relationship will work”. Does he sees this a game? He went out looking for a girl that is typically not his type, flirt, single mother who had a multiple bfs.
Im trying to understand his point of view why he left me, because i was going to work aboad so he thought im goin to leave him for good. Is this a rebound?
admin

December 3, 2013 at 7:34 pm

Some guys do yes. But I am not sure he specifically does.
Sabrina

November 30, 2013 at 1:52 am

Im just so afraid that he will fall for that girl, the girl has a huge crush on my ex so she probably wont do something to jeprodize there relationship. And the girl had a history of flirting with other guys and two timinh, She even gives gifts to my ex. I think shes filling up all that i lack when i was with my ex.
Sabrina

November 29, 2013 at 10:55 am

Its been a month that they are together 🙁 he said he was afraid that he will end up alone when if he broke up with the girl and gave us another chance. I already told him that everything was a rash decision that i ended it.
Sabrina

November 29, 2013 at 4:17 am

Even his mother is not approve of their relationship, he keeps telling his mom “i’ll handle it, im not serious about her”
admin

November 30, 2013 at 4:15 am

Then let him handle it and see if he is true to his word.
Sabrina

November 29, 2013 at 2:26 am

Praying to God that it will come true. Thank you chris for listening to me 🙂
Sabrina

November 28, 2013 at 12:25 pm

He moved on sooo fast 🙁 he didnt even greet me on my birthday:(
admin

November 29, 2013 at 1:44 am

typical guy reaction. Don’t worry he will have to face his feelings eventually.
Sabrina

November 28, 2013 at 7:36 am

Chris im being nostalgic about my ex, i remember how i said yes to becoming his gf 🙁
admin

November 29, 2013 at 1:34 am

And? That seems pretty normal to me.
Sabrina

November 27, 2013 at 10:29 pm

Ah yes the stuborn guy i read that on your other article 🙂 it is so just like him, when we fought he wouldnt do the 1st moved , im always the one who will bend backwards . Can i apply the NC on stuborn guys, even though he has a gf at the moment?
admin

November 28, 2013 at 5:24 am

Stubborn guys are more like annoying guys huh? hahaha

Of course NC can.
Sabrina

November 27, 2013 at 3:41 am

He told me by the phone that they are happy, and that theres no chance of us getting back together. Is it possible weve been together for 4 years . Should i believe what hes saying?
admin

November 27, 2013 at 7:51 pm

Right now he may believe that…
Sabrina

November 26, 2013 at 10:45 pm

Is there still a chance he may turn around? I did tried my best effort to have him back. Why do men put the blame on women when they break up?
admin

November 27, 2013 at 7:27 pm

Because they are idiots and want to play the “victim.”
Sabrina

November 26, 2013 at 10:21 pm

Yes i still want to get him back. But every we talked he kept on blaming me.
admin

November 27, 2013 at 7:25 pm

Give him some time then.
Sabrina

November 26, 2013 at 12:55 am

I have another question based on your other article “is your ex in a rebound relationship” you said there Now, the opposite can be true as well. Lets say a girls boyfriend has moved on to a new relationship within the three month time frame we set above. The ex couple had dated for two years. However, the girl and her now ex boyfriends relationship was filled with nothing but bad memories. Well, while I still think that in this imaginary case the guy moved on too quickly there is always a possibility that his new girlfriend is not a rebound because the girls previous relationship with him is filled with nothing but bad memories.

Me and my ex been together for 4 years, and yes we do have ups and downs because of my attitude of breaking up habit, and now his telling now that i did not appreciate him everytime i tried to talk to him he kept on pointing out all the bad things. Is this is mean his new gf not a rebound? Is there any chance we can still be together if his mind set is like this??
admin

November 26, 2013 at 7:33 pm

I am not sure I quite understand. Do you think you can explain it a bit better for me?
Sabrina

November 25, 2013 at 10:08 pm

Should i take back the text message i sent him? “You were not only my bf but also my bestfriend, 1st kiss to 1st dance We been through alot from losing your dog to having a new one, from your 1st job, losing your house to having a new one, you were there when dad was in the hosp, from passing my board exam etc, to planning babies and to be wed someday, thank you for the good memories i hope someday we will cross each other paths”. Should i take this back? I only told him this because he kept on telling me all the bad stuff I’ve done in the past. Btw im 23 and he is 25.
admin

November 26, 2013 at 7:14 pm

Hmm I wouldn’t send that if I was you. Not now.
Sabrina

November 25, 2013 at 9:33 pm

And when i asked him if he still loves me, he hesitated to answer but finally answered with a No.
admin

November 26, 2013 at 7:05 pm

Well, do you still want to try to get him back?
Sabrina

November 25, 2013 at 9:29 pm

Yesterday we talked. it was so confusing because he gave me signs that we can still be together like “i wasnt serious about my new gf, give me time, maybe im confused etc” i told him all this things you were saying to me gave me hope that we can still fix our relationship it would not be the same as we left off but it would be different, just give me one last chance. Just trust me again and i will change, i even told him what to say to his gf so that they can break up because hes so stuborn. Then he started bringing up the past that i never appreciated him i alway hurt him. Sounds to me his new gf is feeling up all that i lacked when i was his gf. He said “were happy now, i cant break up with her, theres no chance we can be together you had your chance” i started to text him a goodbye text telling our fun memories together i was his 1st gf. I dunno what to do, i cant do the NC because he already told me that were done.
Sabrina

November 25, 2013 at 3:11 pm

He told me that we are never getting back together 🙁
admin

November 25, 2013 at 8:41 pm

When did he say this?
Sabrina

November 25, 2013 at 1:54 am

Thats true chris. But his current gf is his boss so if he told her that he wants to break up due to he loves me, his name will be destroy and his career.
admin

November 25, 2013 at 7:48 pm

Wow, sleeping his way to the top eh?
admin

November 24, 2013 at 8:00 pm

Well actions speak louder than words in my opinon BUT it’s not a bad sign.
Sabrina

November 12, 2013 at 11:52 pm

Yes i will do that 🙂 thank you!
Sabrina

November 12, 2013 at 8:51 am

Should i wait for him? Or is he just planning how to break up with the girl?
admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:26 pm

I wouldn’t wait around but I would keep my heart open to the possiblity.

Anne

November 12, 2013 at 5:28 am

So me and my ex boyfriend just broke up two weeks ago, and we were both agreeing on not changing anything on our social media because we were trying to fix things. Then last night he just took me off his bio, and changed his Twitter picture. I asked him about it and he said that he didn’t know why he did it that he just wanted to. I’ve been very confused with him because when I don’t talk to him like he told me that we don’t need to talk everyday and i wouldn’t reply to his text he would tell me “you’re not gonna reply”. He texted me saying that we don’t need to be talking everyday and that he’s sorry if he came off wrong, and he hoped he’s not hurting me. He finally told me the reason for the break up was that the relationship was too much for him and he can’t handle it with all the stress he has. He told me that it hurts him that I’m hurting because of this, and that he cares about me. He told me he still loves me. I don’t know what to do. I want him back, but do you think the no contact rule would be the best thing for us?

admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:20 pm

He told you that he still loves you… if that is true then maybe you shoul djust talk to him about the relationship and all of that if that doesn’g go well you can do NC then.
Anne

November 13, 2013 at 3:43 am

I’ve tried to talk about our relationship and he told me that right now he doesn’t want to fix things but he told me that he knows were gonna work things out but right now we both need space. we still text once in a while and all but I don’t know how long were gonna be like this for. a couple days ago I asked if he still loved me and if he sees us fixing things and he said of course he’s still in love with me and always will be & he knows were gonna fix things sooner or later. do you think no contact would be a good solution to let him clear his head?
admin

November 13, 2013 at 7:35 pm

I think its a great solution.
Anne

November 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm

We go to the same school and today I was sitting down in a bench and when I looked up I saw him and he saw me and he smiled and walked towards me. I wasn’t gonna go to class so when I told him that and he told me to just go to class because the semester is almost over. So I said okay I was gonna go anyways and then his building was right in front of the bench that I was sitting in front of so when we were walking he went to another walkway so we ended up passing his building and he was walking me to class without even telling me. He was already gonna be late to class but he still walked me. We saw his friends when we were walking and then they were don’t take long walking your girl and be late and he was like I won’t. We talked about who we have told about the break up & he told me that he only told his cousins and his bestfriend who won’t say anything. if he was really done wouldn’t he just tell everyone he’s single & not just tell people that would keep it private? He was 10 mins late to class and he didn’t even care. We just kept looking at each other & he was like you should go to class when we were standing in front of my class and when he hugged me he put his lips on the top of my head like he was about to kiss it like he used to. he pulled me close to him w/ just one arm and we stayed like that for more than 5 seconds. I’m so confused. do you understand how he’s acting?
admin

November 15, 2013 at 5:20 pm

Yes, he likes you and has feelings for you but remember. its all about getting him to commit.
Anne

November 15, 2013 at 7:12 pm

How do I do that?
admin

November 16, 2013 at 7:57 pm

Sorry I lost our conversation thread. How do you do what?
Anne

November 17, 2013 at 11:04 am

Make him commit.
I just really want to work things out already and I feel like the longer that we just avoid the topic the longer this will drag on.
Will it be bad if I text him & tell him that I miss him? Even if I know that he loves me and cares about me still?
admin

November 17, 2013 at 8:51 pm

Yes at this piont it wouldn’t help you much. It would just feed his ego.

Kessy

November 12, 2013 at 4:46 am

Hey Chris,I have been dating this guy since June and in October I found out I was pregnant and when I told him he did not accept but later did. But I lost the pregnancy as it was ectopic and did go for surgery,while at the hospital I just called him up to say I was in the hospital but he did not come, when I left the hospital he was looking after me for a week and that was when he found out I lost the baby but we did sort things out and he later told me he wants time out now to find himself again and I told him I did understand and I stopped talking to him it is a week and three days I have not communicated with him.i love him so much.what can I do?

admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:16 pm

NC rule seems like your best bet here. I am sorry for the tough time you are going through. I truly am.

Jen

November 12, 2013 at 1:16 am

OK so im the person who asked about the rides part. So how would I do limited contact? he wants to be friends so for the most part we just small talk in the car bc im trying to do “limited contact” but a lot of the time i just sound like some pissed off girl like the kind still bitter about the fact we broke up. like when he says something i just give an awkward smile and i dont even laugh at his jokes. if i accepted the fact i wanted to be friends iwould probably be laughing and talking like how we were when we were together but bc i want him back im trying to do limited contact but im worried he might just leave me and not even bother being my friend bc im acting boring and cant “move on”. its hard bc im in a situation where i cant test out no contact. any tips on doing this “limited contact?”

admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:55 pm

LC- its like no contact in that you do not contact him and you do not respond to his messages to you but when you see him in person you are pleasant, happy and confident.

Lise

November 11, 2013 at 10:14 pm

My ex and I broke up a little less than a year ago. I sent him a long text after the break up apologisig for my angry reaction and telling him I hoped he would be alright. He did not respond. I later sent him a message asking him a lot of questions that he never responded to. I then just let him be. I had a small rebound relationship with a guy and I’m sure he heard about it. During the stint with the other guy he texted me about twice and I ignored him. I contacted him a month later, and was pretty terrible to him. He apologized for hurting me and took the insults. We talked for a bit after that as friends for a few weeks. We even planned to meet up. Then I drunk dialed him, I do not remember a word I said. He heard that I was drunk and apparently had spoken about him to someone he knew. He was pretty angry. It was not the first time I had contacted him while intoxicated. We sorted that out and started being friends again. I was mainly the one trying to keep the friendship. We confessed we still had feeling for each other then decided we would work on getting our lives in better places then see what we could be, I backed out of this, and he said he agreed and that we would speak soon and we haven’t spoken since. It’s been two months almost. I really do not know what to do. =(

admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:46 pm

Have you tried contacting him?

Catharine

November 11, 2013 at 8:30 pm

Should I de-friend my ex on facebook. He broke up with me through text because he is not in the right state of mind wants and wants to be alone we ran into each last week and hugged and went separate ways, its been a week and half since that last contact. He is posting pics of how happy he is and is now ‘liking’ sex pages and pin up pages. When for the past 4 years of having a fb he has not liked something like that nor had he ever had crude humor or pressured me into anything. Im not watching his page, it pops up on newsfeed I dont know if I can do that to myself. Is it to immature of me to defriend him and then I would never be able to want him back or should I not worry about what he thinks anymore and just finish it now. I thought he was one thing now he is being another.

admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:39 pm

I would not and here is why: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/the-definitive-guide-to-using-facebook-to-get-your-ex-boyfriend-back/

Nancy

November 11, 2013 at 4:48 pm

So im wondering if it is too late. It has been 7 weeks and for the most part I have been acting like a lunatic. Texting him and then getting angry for him not wanting me. Now on day 3 of no contact.Can this still work?

Nancy

November 12, 2013 at 1:21 pm

In the last 7 weeks he has said he wants nothing to do with me and he is happy he didnt make the mistake of marrying me. I have said horrible things too like I understand why his ex wife cheated on him. With all this being said do you still think there is a chance he wants me back?
admin

November 12, 2013 at 7:36 pm

There is always a chance but a certain part of it is out of your hands. This is something you have to realize.
admin

November 11, 2013 at 7:15 pm

No worries and your not acting like a lunatic.

Just keep in NC.

EM

November 11, 2013 at 2:23 pm

a few emails, 2 contacts and a post of my life on the page and no reply but only to find everything i type up is deleted. So lets see what to do if i ask what i am looking for this way insted of giving my story.

The guys is in the does not know what he wants area.
He may be scared
or he may feel guilty about something

so after three years he broke it off claimed he didnt love me (I know this is a lie) and that it was because he didnt miss me while at work when his shift changed.

one month prior to the brake on oct 21 he was telling me he was looking for a way to aske me to marry him. and a day beofre still telling me he loved me in his sleep

no issues with our familys they all loved each other and this came as a shock to everyone not only myself. as he told friends and fmaily i was the forver girl.

Now what do I do?

I have not spoken with him since. only two texts one relating to our dog the other out of concern for a day i know he has trouble with.

Please help

admin

November 11, 2013 at 6:57 pm

How long have you been in NC?

tiffany

November 11, 2013 at 1:55 pm

Hello, well my story is kinda a hard one, my ex and I just broke up about 5 day’s we are still living together because im trying to find some where else to move, we still have a good relationship with each other even tho we arent dating anymore, we went threw alot of rough times with each other being on and off for over 4 years this time it was 2 years , we have a hard time dealing with each other’s families and we both know it had definitely taken its toll on us, we were engaged and everything, I still love him and I know we still care for each other, the reason we broke up is because he said he was tired of trying to make it work, I know if our lives had been in a better place we would still be together, so am I screwed have I lost him forever? What do I do?

admin

November 11, 2013 at 6:57 pm

No you haven’t. You just have to put some work in.
tiffany

November 16, 2013 at 5:08 pm

What should my steps be to getting him back ?
admin

November 16, 2013 at 11:14 pm

I talk about this in the E-Book.

Zainab

November 10, 2013 at 11:22 pm

My boyfriend and I would have reached our second year anniversary on January 9th, but he decided to break up with me on the 5th. His reasoning was that he isn’t looking for a long term relationship. We were very close and this breakup felt so abrupt to me. The last few times I’ve seen him or been around him in class, he looks extremely depressed and I even saw him crying. I think he still has feelings for me. Considering his reasoning for breaking up with me, should I even try to get him back? I still have strong feelings for him and I would love to get back together but I’m wondering if I even have a chance.

admin

November 11, 2013 at 5:56 pm

You should only try getting him back if it is what you truly want. If you can see a future with him.

Carmen

November 10, 2013 at 9:45 pm

Im totally sure his reaction has to do with the fact that above the pic my friend shared with me it says Friend’s Name WAS with Carmen. I dont know why FB puts that legend! So I think my bf asumes Im dating someone else.
Its a day since his reply, so should I text back something like ‘I would never laugh at you. I dont know what you mean.’

admin

November 11, 2013 at 5:46 pm

You can.

But if you are in NC I would just let him sweat it out.
Carmen

November 11, 2013 at 6:10 pm

No I was on day 40 when texted him last Saturday. I didnt reply his immediately so yesterday I texted him saying I would never laugh at you. I love laughing with you. And then I added a funny experience we had together. But he hasnt replied yet.
admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:20 pm

Give him a few more days if he doesn’t then wait a week and retry.
Carmen

November 12, 2013 at 7:02 pm

If he doesnt text me again you mean?
admin

November 13, 2013 at 6:26 pm

yes.
Carmen

November 12, 2013 at 6:03 pm

Update!

My bf’s just texted saying: Hi there hope u r keeping well. I guess something on fb was there at same time as ur MSG arrived the other day. Maybe a coincidence but its why I said what I did in that text. Take care.

Im waiting to reply… But how long should I? What does the Love Guru say?? LOL
admin

November 13, 2013 at 6:24 pm

Maybe a day.
Carmen

November 13, 2013 at 11:44 pm

I gave him a day so today I replied: “Im very well thanks! Quite busy thats why i didnt reply yesterday.
I dont know what you mean about fb but Im curious! Lol
Back from stopping a leave after some days off. Been to that office, remember? Much better weather but i missed those sandwiches at that café at the corner (and the company too)

Its obvious hes Been spying my fb and hes jealous of that new friend. Hope Im doing things right! What do you think?
admin

November 14, 2013 at 7:00 pm

I think you are doing things right and I think its awesome that he is getting jealous.
Carmen

November 14, 2013 at 8:20 pm

Great! Thanks! 🙂
Carmen

November 17, 2013 at 7:32 am

How long do you think I should wait to text my bf if he doesnt reply the last one I sent 4 days ago?
I think hes confussed with my relaxed atittude. Besides in the past I used to write an email reminding him of what we had built and sugesting giving ourselves another chance. He would immediately text or call. But this time we went further and I want a new reborn for our relationship. But on the other hand hes so stubborn that I would throw him that stone saying I miss u to see if he reacts!
admin

November 17, 2013 at 8:34 pm

A week.

Nicole

November 10, 2013 at 8:37 am

So last week, my boyfriend & I had a disagreement that ended with him walking away from me. I drove home & didn’t contact him. I only was in contact with his mom, just to make sure he got home safely. Last Sunday morning, I woke up to several missed calls & texts from him. He had texted me Saturday night, but I was sleep. I replied to his text, we talked on the phone, & worked things out. Now fast forward to this Friday, I asked him to go with me to get my oil change. We went & after I took him directly back home. When I asked him something about if his phone was off, I couldn’t really hear him. So I went home & started no contact again. He called me about 2 hours later, just to supposedly make sure I got home safely. Late last night, he tagged me in something on Facebook. His comment was something like: “My gf doesn’t pay me attention or care so idc either.” Then I replied with “Well you finally got something right.” I’m unsure if he’s upset about that. I thought he was joking, so I joked right back. I also know he says silly things like that to get my attention.
I do remember him telling me he would be busy today, cooking at a family birthday party. I just don’t see how he couldn’t contact me at least once. On the other hand, I did tell him I would be hanging out with one of my friends. So maybe he assumed I was busy. Either way, we always try to make an effort to keep in contact whether we’re busy or not.
Now I don’t want to say his Facebook post is directed at me, but it does slightly worry me. He recently posted this “No text back, ok cool! Don’t be surprised when I answer you with the ‘who’s this?’ ” I’ve decided to practice no contact until he contacts me. When we worked things out last week, I told him I wasn’t going to deal with a on/off relationship. When we first broke up in June, he just stopped talking to me so I’m unsure if this is the same thing.

I don’t want to make excuses for him, but he has a lot of growing up to do. I’m really focused on school & I already know my future career plans. He’s in school too, but seems very unfocused. I don’t think he’s really sure about what he wants to do with his life. So I think that’s affecting our relationship, but I’m trying not to assume too much.

*Do you think I’m overreacting?
*Should I continue no contact?
*Are all of these things signs that he’s over the relationship?

Thanks in advance! Your tactics helped me fix things with my bf back in August. I don’t want to give up on the relationship unless it’s really not meant for me to be in. Although I don’t think I deserve someone who isn’t sure of their life plans (is on the same level), I just have the biggest urge to want to be there to encourage him. So I’m kind of stuck in the middle.

admin

November 10, 2013 at 10:01 pm

1. A little bit but its kind of normal haha.
2. Yes yes yes.
3. Not necessarily.
Nicole

November 10, 2013 at 11:35 pm

Ok, so what exactly is going on with him? Is there a guide you can refer me to?
admin

November 11, 2013 at 5:59 pm

Hmmm… maybe the understanding men guide.
Nicole

November 11, 2013 at 6:35 pm

Ok thanks, I’ll definitely read that guide. Are you sure I shouldn’t contact him, since he called me last on Friday? I read through the ‘male mind during no contact’ guide & I think he’s not even aware that I’m using nc on him. I forgot to mention that his phone has been off for the past 2 months. He was using another phone to text/call me on, but he lost it or something on Thursday. So the only way he can really call me is from his house phone or someone else’s cell phone. I don’t know if that’s part of why he hasn’t called or anything, but I just thought it was vital information.

You also said that the things I reported to you aren’t signs of a breakup. Could they be signs of him being unsure of us at the moment? If not then what are they signs of?

* Also if he hasn’t contacted me within my 30 days of nc, I’m thinking of fully moving on. Throughout our relationship, I’ve tried nc numerous times with him. I’m just tired of not having a solid relationship with someone who supposedly loves me & says all these nice things that they’re planning to do for me. Then these great things never happen b/c he becomes upset with me over some of the silliest things.
admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:24 pm

I am sure.

You want to move on as in you don’t want him back?
Nicole

November 11, 2013 at 5:10 am

I also plan on only using no contact until he contacts me. Is that ok?
admin

November 11, 2013 at 6:25 pm

Hey it’s your life you do whatever you feel most comfortable with I am all for that.

Ryn

November 10, 2013 at 5:50 am

Hi! I sent you a message yesterday.

So my bf and I broke up months ago but still has communications after that. One time he told me he loves me but is scared of going back together because he is worried that the mistakes in our relationship might happen again.

Then one day we suddenly argued about something. He became upset and told me we have to think of what we really want.

We have been in no contact for a few days until suddenly, a few days later, he called and asked me if everything is ok and that I can call him if ever I needed any help.

I really want to know if I broke the no contact rule. And was that just a friendly call? Can I talk to him about us as early as now? He sounded really sad.

admin

November 10, 2013 at 9:56 pm

Yup this is breaking it 🙁

Melina

November 9, 2013 at 6:20 pm

My boyfriend and I were together for only 3 months. We got along so well and never fought about a thing. He said and did everything a girl dreams a guy would say and do and made me believe he was in our relationship for good. Then, one day, out of the blue he said he didn’t feel connected to me and didn’t see me in his life. I believe this was all due to a miscommunication and by the time I had a chance to clear it up it was too late.

It’s been just over a month that we’ve been broken up and even though he said some harsh things that would normally make me take a hint I’m not convinced he meant it. I want to keep trying. What do you think?

admin

November 10, 2013 at 1:21 am

When was the last time you talked to him?
Melina

November 10, 2013 at 1:35 am

We talked in person a month ago last Wednesday and texted a few days after that. Since then there’s been nothing.
Melina

November 10, 2013 at 2:22 am

Oh, I liked something of his on FB. Does that count?
admin

November 10, 2013 at 9:42 pm

Yea not a good sign…

krissy

November 9, 2013 at 4:22 pm

I was wondering. Me and my ex have been broken up for two months and we have Fallin into a friends with benefitskind of thing. In fact i was at his house last night taking to him and he said to get over the beak up cause he’s never coming back. I still love him and want him. But he has said this a few times. Will this work for me? I am terrified take this is not going to help even significantly.

admin

November 10, 2013 at 1:20 am

Hav eyou tried NC yet?
krissy

November 11, 2013 at 5:56 pm

I have started. And i have been doing exercises everyday to help with my appearance and feeling better.
admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:18 pm

Well thats good. How about socially? Hanging out with friends more?
krissy

November 16, 2013 at 6:46 am

It is a little harder for me to hang out with friends. I work two jobs but i have been taking to more friends on the phone.
admin

November 16, 2013 at 9:59 pm

Well do what you can. I know it must be hard working two jobs.

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