How To Get Your Boyfriend Back If YOU Cheated On Him- Advice & Help

1,988 thoughts on “You Want Your Ex Back After Cheating On Him…. Here’s What To Do”

Rachel

November 11, 2013 at 5:05 pm

I started dating my bestfriend of three years. We had absolutely no feelings until he moved in with me and i was painting my room so i slept in in his bed for a few nights. One of them we got drunk, and madeout. He started gaining feelings but i didnt want to ruin the friendship. Finally i gave in, 5 months later we got into an argument and he left and took everything. About three days passed and i got too drunk one night and slept in the same bed as kne of my other friends, kissed but told him i didnt want to soon after. Ironically my ex shows up at 5 am freaking out. It looked worse than it was but we’ve both had trust issues in the past. He said brutal things and that he never wanted to speak to me again and deleted me on every social media network. I seen him at a party the next night and i acted okay about everything. The next morning he blew my phone up saying how i never cared or loved him, that hes miserable, and cant believe i did that to him. I feel terrible. I dont know why it happened, i was upset. I do love him and want nothing more than him back in my life. The no contact rule is good, but what if he texts me? Hes going to think i dont care if i dont reply eventually and move on…

admin

November 11, 2013 at 7:23 pm

if he texts you you are supposed to ignore it.

Mary

November 10, 2013 at 3:18 am

hi! i’ve commented here before… don’t know if you remember but i was the one whose ex was wishy washy about returning my things even though it’s been a long time… a short version is that i cheated on him after two years of dating, and i honestly admitted it to him and we broke up. tried several times to contact him to exchange our things, and either he would say yes next week and it never happens, or simply ignores me. it’s been ten months now, and i contact him every so often to try to exchange things.. but i realized over time that i really miss him and want him in my life.. now finally we will be meeting up soon (if he doesn’t bail) and i really want to get him back… what should i do? what should i say? i’m really nervous…

admin

November 10, 2013 at 9:52 pm

Have you read this: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/what-to-do-on-a-date-with-your-ex-boyfriend/
Mary

November 11, 2013 at 3:03 am

i did.. we broke up with a hug, but i wouldn’t call it a good breakup since i cheated. i wouldn’t our meeting up a “date” or anything close to it. i guess we’re just having coffee and supposedly exchanging our stuff. just feel the other one isn’t applicable to this situation.. although of course there are some tips that would work.

ultimately, i want to try to get him back after a break up. i have no idea if i should apologize again, or just come off like i’ve been fine without him, etc. =/
admin

November 11, 2013 at 6:21 pm

Can I ask why you cheated on him?
Mary

November 11, 2013 at 6:25 pm

well, not really lightening the mood, but i have depression. so a lot of the time, i don’t feel like i’m good enough. we didn’t really have sex too often, and that made me feel like there was something wrong with me. so when someone actually showed a bit of interest, i fell for it. since then, i am finally taking medication. and i’ve come to realize that i was insecure and i knew my ex loved me. i know it’s my fault, there’s no doubt about that.
admin

November 12, 2013 at 6:22 pm

There is no reason for you to feel like you aren’t good enough. You need to shift that thinking to HE isn’t good enough for you.
Mary

November 13, 2013 at 5:30 pm

I know deep down you’re right. I met up with him and everything was going well, until the end when I couldn’t bear him leaving, so I asked for him back. But he said no, I asked why and he said he’s tired of trying and we’ve tried before. But. I know he still loves me, I can see it. We both started crying when I tried to ask for him back. He even said he missed me. But obviously I screwed the meeting up and he’s back to having no open line of communication to me. I’m so lost. I don’t want to lose him and I’m really dedicated to gain back his trust and this relationship.. I don’t know how to get this one chance. I am a good person who made one terrible mistake; I feel I deserve at least one last chance to show him, but I don’t even know how to get him to talk to me…
admin

November 13, 2013 at 9:21 pm

Well, first you need to forgive yourself.
Mary

November 14, 2013 at 7:33 am

is it silly to think that if he is able to forgive me, i can forgive myself? the fact that he can’t even talk to me makes me feel so much worse. either way.. i want to establish an open communication to him, but i’m not sure how to do that after monday.
Mary

November 15, 2013 at 4:09 am

In your opinion, do you think there’s any hope left in this?
admin

November 15, 2013 at 7:09 pm

I think there is hope its just going to take some patience from you.
admin

November 14, 2013 at 7:40 pm

No its not silly but you need to move past it and be able to forgive yourself first before anything. People make mistakes.

Dakota Bogert

November 8, 2013 at 4:20 pm

Okay, so I have been dating this guy for two and a half years. We have had our ups and downs like every relationship. Well, about a month ago, we got into a HUGE fight, his parents even told me that I deserved better. But the only person who knows what’s best for me, is me.( Note: We broke up for about four days, no communication, and then he came running back.) But, during the time that we were broken up, his ex told me that he cheated on her, which in the past cheating has never been an issue with us. But after that, I got curious. He was having car issues for a bit of time, so I came to conclusion that he wouldn’t be cheating on me, but then I thought, maybe he was on a website, talking to other girls. So, my mistake I made a “match.com” account, when we were broken up. Not to look for guys, nor to talk to guys, but to see if he had an account. I admit that making one just to look for him, I shouldn’t have edited it as much as I did, but it wouldn’t “accept” to get confirmed until I filled out my information. Once I got on, I tried to search for him, but it asked for a payment, I wasn’t going to pay just to see if he had one. So I got off. We’ve been back together for a couple weeks, after the four days we were broken up, well two days ago, he got onto my email and found out about the match.com, and thinks that I was talking to other guys or had intentions to. BUT, I didn’t and that was not my intention. We’re done, because he thinks that, and wants nothing to do with me. Even though I admitted my wrong, and am telling him the 100 percent truth about talking to absolutely nobody on there. I understand why he is mad, hurt, and why he thinks I’m lying, but I’m really not. What do I do?! :'(

admin

November 8, 2013 at 7:22 pm

Tell him the truth he definteily has trust issues.
Dakota Bogert

November 8, 2013 at 10:28 pm

I did tell him the truth! That I got on there to see if he had one. But he still thinks that I was talking to other guys. He blocked my number and everything, said he wants nothing to do with me. I don’t want to lose him over my mistake, I know the truth & have been telling him the truth, but he’s only believing what he thinks is the truth.
admin

November 10, 2013 at 12:17 am

Yes well that is his issue. Its a bummer too 🙁

Keri

November 4, 2013 at 10:53 am

I have been dating this guy for a year and 2 months. He lived with me for 8 months and moved out because of things that happened between him and I and because my older daughter was not being that nice toward him for a few months and he wanted to have respect. Well when he moved out he still wanted to have a relationship with me and work on things. I for one felt he didnt care anymore and it broke my heart that he moved out, I tried to see him but the hurt was to much so I went out with another guy to eat and to a party, have not done anything with this new guy only been seeing him 3 weeks now but I told my exboyfriend I was seeing him when he asked about going out on one of the same nights a cpl weeks ago. He got very upset and texted me FU and hasnt talked to me since. I did text him cpl days ago because pics sent out by group of my kids and trick n treating and he received one so I said sorry forgot to delete you off y group, and asked him how he was and that I still love him. He never responded but I did here from a friend last week that he still very much cares for me. I didnt know how much I love him till now,my heart aches for him so bad all I want is to see him, I truly do love him and need to know rt now if things will work out or end them so I can move on. We have not talked yet about all this so I actually cannot move on with this new guy until I know for sure he is done and wants nothing to do with me, if that makes sense. I just feel so much love for him and now with this new guy in the picture I just cant move on with him until I know. I know you mention wait 30days but my ex is the type if you do not let him know you care for him he turns away fast. I really dont feel waiting 30 days is going to be good cause I would really like to talk to him now and get things figured out…am I wrong????

admin

November 4, 2013 at 6:15 pm

Have you done NC yet? I know you are concerned but just try it a few days.
Keri

November 4, 2013 at 9:47 pm

I am trying the NC. I am glad I saw this site before sending out a cpl texts I had ready to send lastnight telling him how much I do love and miss him. It is hard to not send but I am keeping my mind set not to. I do believe he should be the first one to let me know he is ready to talk. I will probably be seeing him wednesday when I go out with friends..we go to same place and he sings there…should I say hi or see if he says hi or just ignore him??? I do plan to look quite nice 🙂 I have not seen him since oct. 12 which was the last time we were together or seen each other.
admin

November 5, 2013 at 5:26 pm

You don’t want things to be awkward so you can say hi BUT don’t talk to him too long.
Keri

November 5, 2013 at 1:54 am

Ive read the getting him jealous section..now I dont know if that would work on him since he is tired of guys falling all over me and talking and touching me. But I cant help that when I go into a place they want to get to know me! Now im nervous if I see him Wednesday…should I be secure and talk to others like he isnt there or keep it toned down so I dont upset him??? Man why am I so worried..lol…I know why, because him and I are so compatible in many ways and I cant understand why he wont get back to me like he always did….how should I handle if I see him this week?
admin

November 5, 2013 at 5:50 pm

Well making him jealous may not be the best idea fo ryour situation specifically.
Keri

November 5, 2013 at 2:36 am

Sorry Chris, I have to ask…what if this new guy comes out to the bar also? Should I ask him not to cause its a girls night out? I would hate for my ex to get really emotional seeing him there with me…
admin

November 5, 2013 at 5:51 pm

Its up to you completely. Sometimes a little jealousy is a good thing. BUT I guess in your case its not so I wouldn’t make him come.

Sarah

November 2, 2013 at 10:13 pm

Okay, so I was in a relationship for almost 5 months. I know it seems like it’s not that long to even care that we broke up, but we had so much in common that I felt like I knew him for a lifetime. He became my best friend and when we hung out we didn’t do stupid sexual things all the time, we did fun things to keep us strong and connected. Sometimes it was hard though because he went to a different school than me and the distance was kind of tough. I saw him every weekend during the school year, and I saw him a few times during the week over the summer, but as the new school year began I didn’t get to see him as much and it was about a month that I didn’t see him. It was harder than ever, but one night he asked me something and told me to be honest. He asked me if I kissed a guy while I was at a party. I knew that if any way I explained this, it wouldn’t change his thoughts, I told him the story, which was during the summer I was with friends, my one friend pressured me into going to a party and I agreed to go, there was alcohol there and I didn’t want to do it because I knew I would do something wrong, including there were guys there. My one friend ended up convincing me into doing it and while I was she told me to kiss a guy, I said no because I have a boyfriend but I ended up doing it apparently. I never wanted to do it and I would take back every second of it, but my ex never understood that. He thought that I just did it on purpose when I would never do that in a million years. He ended up finding out from his brother. (How? I don’t know.) but that made him even more mad, I was going to tell him because it was killing me inside, and he didn’t believe that either. After I told him he became distant with me and ignored me. I thought that if he loved me as much as he said he did, he wouldn’t break up with me. I understood that he would be mad at me but not mad enough to just give up on me. Later on he finally texted me and he said he was unhappy and didn’t want to lead me on. He said he loved me but now he doesn’t? Don’t know how that makes sense because he obviously didn’t love me in the first place then. But anyway, we broke up later on that day. Ever since then I tried my hardest to not text him and tell him that I missed him but I couldn’t do it, I texted him and 4 out of the 5 times he didn’t reply, it crushed me seeing how he completely changed. I threw everything out there to fix it and it was like talking to a brick wall. I just feel like I can’t find anyone else that could make me as happy as he did, and I honestly don’t want to be with anyone else. I want him to realize that but he won’t. I just want him back into my life and I want to be as happy as I was a month ago. Just please help me, I would do anything to have him back and I need your help. What do I do?

admin

November 3, 2013 at 5:30 pm

Have you tried NC yet? That seems like a good way forward.

Dajane

November 2, 2013 at 6:22 am

GOkay me and my ex was dating for 1 and 9months and I cheated on him with his own brother (older brother). My ex told me he forgives both us and that he still loves me and he want to get back together but he doesnt know if we can. Because his two older brothers trusted me and they feel like I betrayed my ex and that we shouldnt ever be together again. My ex look up to his older brothers (He has three) so he listen to what they say about anything. My ex parents forgave me and think me and my ex should get back together but my ex think that if we try again that it would be worst and I want to change his mind and show him that at least trying our relationship on more time could be worth it. Also after we broke up like 2 weeks later I found out I waas pregnant and right now im 3 months a pregnant almost 4 with my ex baby s

admin

November 2, 2013 at 7:21 pm

He knows it’s his right?

Emily C.

November 1, 2013 at 8:09 pm

I dated a guy for about 6 months. He was perfect at first. Affectionate, attentive, and we made love almost every night. 5 months went by and things started to get stale. He wasn’t paying me much attention and we weren’t intimate near as much. He also had commitment and trust issues because of previous relationships and never told me he loved me. In addition, my ex had come back into the picture and started texting me to go on dates, come over, etc., but I always said no because I had a boyfriend. One night,my boyfriend went out one night with his friends when he previously told me we would do something together. I had been drinking that night and was upset with my boyfriend and made the mistake of inviting my ex over. We slept together. My boyfriend found out 3 weeks later, dumped me, and says he never wants to speak to me again. I’ve apologized up and down and told him how much I love him and regret it, but he says he hates me. I guess no contact would be the best option at this point.

admin

November 2, 2013 at 6:22 pm

No contact and time are your best options.

It’s not giong to be an easy road and you are going to have to work to regain his trust.
Emily C.

November 2, 2013 at 11:06 pm

What do you suggest I do to regain his trust? Just give him time? I really miss him. If he decides he wants to talk before 30 days should I speak to him?
admin

November 3, 2013 at 5:36 pm

Time is the great equalizer nothing is a subsititue. NC is great for this.

Elise

November 1, 2013 at 12:03 am

Hi
I was initally seeing this guy for about 3 weeks. (GUY1) But I liked guy1’s friend so ended it and started getting to know his friend(GUY2). Guy2 was very romantic and my IDEAL man. However I had to go and collect my things from guy1 and we ended up sleeping together. I confessed to guy2 what happened and he forgived me. I started seeing guy2 more seriously and cut contact with guy1 completely. After about a month guy2 told me that he was finding it difficult to connect emotionally with me and wanted to end. I was very upset but guy1 said we would still be friends. At work guy1 came in (not to see me, to buy food) but he asked how me and guy2 were? I told him that he had ended it. Guy1 invited me over to his, feeling low I thought I would distract myself from the pain and go over after work. I went over and we slept together. I quickly realised I had made a huge mistake going back and would tell guy2 what happened when we next saw each other.I cut contact with guy1 again. However after 1 week guy 2 told me he knew that I had gone back to guy1. He has sent a huge argument over saying he wanted me out of his life (which I can understand), he blocked me on facebook and removed whatsapp where we would chat. Since then I have wrote him a letter and one text, not hearing back. I’m not going to have NC and review myself so that I am more available to him if he does come back. What do you think? Any tips because I do really care for him and he is so lovely. I majorally messed up. But I want to fix this so bad

Elise

November 1, 2013 at 12:07 am

*I’m now going to have NC and review myself so that I am more available to him if he does come back.
admin

November 1, 2013 at 6:23 pm

I think that is the best thing for you I really do!
Elise

November 4, 2013 at 10:11 pm

So guy2 messaged me asking how I was. Should I continue on the no contact rule or just go with the flow?
admin

November 5, 2013 at 5:29 pm

continue with the NC rule.
Elise

November 1, 2013 at 12:05 am

*guy2 said we could still be friends after he ended it.

Kc

October 30, 2013 at 2:12 pm

Hello, I was hoping to get some advice. Last Saturday night I blacked out from drinking (something that has not happened since college) and slept with my boyfriends best friend. At his house while my boyfriend was passé out in the living room. I literally do not remember this happening and I do not even remember getting home that night. The best friend called my boyfriend last night confessing and saying I was talking about how my boyfriend and I argue and what not. When my boyfriend told me this I denied it because I did not think it could have happened, then he gave me more details and it was the first time I was hearing about the incident. I truly feel violated by this “best friend” but also want to know of I can ever be forgiven from my boyfriend? We live together with pets and talked about marriage. I never intentionally hurt him and I definitely did not premeditate anything. He is so mad at me and I just don’t know what to do.

admin

October 30, 2013 at 9:50 pm

First off, not cool about blacking out.

Have you tried the NC rule yet?
Kc

October 30, 2013 at 10:23 pm

I know it’s not cool about blacking out, I never drink as I am 26 and a responsible adult for the most part, I would never intentionally drink to the point of blacking out, but I obviously do not know my limits. As far the NC method, he lives with me, we have a home together and he has to stay living with me until at least February because he works as an accountant and during tax season is primarily when he makes enough money to get a place on his own so with us living together how can I expect to go 30 days without contact? Am I hopeless?
I’m just devastated because this is out of character for me, really it is.
admin

October 31, 2013 at 7:13 pm

You were hurting I get it believe me I don’t think any less of you just for your own safety and health don’t do it again. I know I don’t know you but I do want the best for you!

Looks like you will have to work some form of LC.

Brianna Jones

October 28, 2013 at 8:59 pm

My Ex and I have been together off and on for a year and 2 months. The beginning was wonderful but thing is we NEVER had an argument like a real relationship does so i felt as if there was someone else. Then i found out he wanted to have sex with a girl i knew then we broke up i forgave him and took him back but then i had cheated on him with someone he doesn’t like. He didn’t find out until things between me and him was just right i knew we both were in love at that point then my so called friends told him. Now he has a new girlfriend but he told me he is only with her to get over me. i really want him back but im not the type to try to steal someone or beg for someone back. i want him to come to me.

admin

October 29, 2013 at 3:03 am

I agree with you. Begging and stealing someone back is not the way to go. You might want to check out the rebound relationship post.

Elizabeth N.

October 26, 2013 at 7:15 pm

So my now ex and I had met in November of last year. It had only been 3 months since my last relationship but my ex was so great that I didn’t want to let the opportunity pass me by and I thought we would be great together. Within the first week of knowing each other things moved really fast and we had met each others families. I had always felt iffy about things, maybe because of the bad things that had happened in my last relationship. I have a tendency to always expect the worst to happen at some point. I started feeling as though things were “off” but couldn’t figure out what. I didn’t know if it was me or him, then come april he tells me he can’t go on my family vacation anymore. He had been getting more and more distant. Then in May he broke it off. I decided to do my own thing, he came back around 2 and half weeks later wanting me back but I wasn’t ready. I felt like I was just starting to do “me” finally. Ironically, a week before he broke it off I was approached by someone else and turned that person down. So after my ex broke it off I decided to contact that person and I started talking to this other guy. So after my ex came back around I was torn and didn’t know what to do. We ended up getting back together in July but I did not cut off communication or seeing this other guy which is where I went wrong. I think that was because I really wasn’t ready to be back with my ex and I was still hurt. The other reason I got back with my ex was that he had told me if I didn’t commit to him then, I wouldn’t have in my life because he could not stand talking to me if I was gonna do my own thing and see him part of the time. He also said he didn’t know where he would be when I was ready. So thats where i went wrong – that is, getting back with him even though I wasn’t ready and still talking to this other guy. I later found out that within the 2 and a half weeks we were not together he had met a hooters girl and slept with her a few times but I let that go because I was trying to put things in the past. I also found an earring in his room that was also not mine but I never said anything about it. Me talking to the other guy went on until late September. I finally decided I had to do the right thing and make a change so I took space from my ex and within a week, although not a long time, I realized I really wanted to be with my ex and not the other guy. The night before my ex and I were gonna talk after the one week of space, he somehow found out about the other guy. Is it ironic that the night before I start doing what I should have everything blows up? So he had called me angrily asking what happened. I drove there, told him part of what happened as I didn’t think divulging every detail would be very beneficial. He proceeded to tell me that there was no shot at us ever getting back together. I asked why he couldn’t give me a second chance when I gave him one and he said because he didn’t believe in them. The next day I wrote him a 5 page letter, he never responded. Two days later, I realized he defriended me on FB so I left a voicemail asking to talk and he never responded. I then waited 9 days and texted him asking to talk, his response was, “I cared about you at one pt and thats why I’m responding but please don’t contact me again, I’ve moved on”. I replied saying that i felt like he never cared because if he did then he would talk to me even if it was just for closure but since he has already moved on so quickly that he doesn’t care. And here I sit now after reading your page of how I should have never done any of those things … what do u think I should do at this point? wait 30 days and then try to reach out? and what do I say?

admin

October 27, 2013 at 10:02 pm

Yes I think that is your best bet wait the inital 30 days and then reach out.
Elizabeth N.

November 2, 2013 at 7:26 pm

If I leave a basket of his favorite things is that still considered contact?
admin

November 3, 2013 at 5:06 pm

Hahah yes and I wouldn’t do that.
Elizabeth N.

November 10, 2013 at 2:29 pm

i did it anyway for myself bc i felt like i needed closure .. have i completely ruined any chance i had? I am officially moving on and starting the NC rule … i feel like I’ve tried so much at this point that even after 30 days i feel like i should wait for him to contact me .. should i wait for him or do i contact him at the end of 30 days?
admin

November 10, 2013 at 10:08 pm

You contact him after 30 days.

Tanya

October 26, 2013 at 7:04 pm

I have been with my boyfriend since I was 15 and we have been together for nearly 10 years. We live together, he found naughty texts to another guy and I confessed something happened between me and this other guy. He left the house for 2 weeks and came back to the house to know why, why it happened. Our sex life hasnt been great for a year and half and he never shows me any affection or apprication. He never tells me he loves me but I know he does. He has told me hes never hated and loved some one so much. I love him and would do anything to get him back. Please help?

admin

October 27, 2013 at 10:02 pm

WOW high school sweethearts huh!

Have you tried the NC rule?

sweet

October 26, 2013 at 11:15 am

My boyfriend of 9months broke up with me the first time when he
went to my fb messenger and read my flirty chats to my tennis friend. after he broke up with me he told me he made up his mind that were not good for each other and its better that we stay as friends. i begged him to not borke up with me and stay but he won’t listen. after 5days of no contact, i went to his office and brought him an im sorry cake and a heartfelt letter of apology. he accepted my apology and were back together. after two weeks, i made a mistake of not telling him were i went when he visited my place. told him i only went with my girlfriend for dinnee but he told me that he doesnt trust me and he cant take it anymore so he broke up with me again. what shoukd i do? i want him back cause i love him.

admin

October 26, 2013 at 6:01 pm

Stick to NC for the entire month.
Sweet

October 26, 2013 at 9:08 pm

Its his birthday this coming november 14. Should i send him a bday greeting by text?
admin

October 27, 2013 at 10:07 pm

I would not.
sweet

October 30, 2013 at 12:55 pm

oh before that hug, he told me that all his feelings for me was replaced with anger. i was truly devastated when he told me that 🙁

also regarding the NC, i know i’ve asked you about whether i should send him a text or not for his bday but i’m kinda scared if that would ruin my chances with him if i wont send him a greeting. sorry chris for bombarding you with post after post.
sweet

October 30, 2013 at 12:46 pm

thanks chris. i forgot to add a tiny detail on our breakup. when he told me that he can’t trust me, he’s tired of expectations and of us and doesn’t want to be with me anymore, i responded okay. i told him i can’t force someone to stay with me if he doesn’t want to anymore. i told him i did everything i could to fix our situation and he told me he knows but his biggest problem is his pride. we hugged each other tightly while i cried over his shoulders and i told him sorry for everything. then before he left i gave him another hug and told him i just want to take a last look at him before leaving cause that would be the last time we’ll ever get to see each other again. he was silent all throughout. i cried when he closed the door and he left.
i just accepted the breakup but deep inside i want him back. m not sure anymore if he was thinking that it was a closure or something cause i still want to be with him. help chris.
admin

October 30, 2013 at 9:45 pm

Trust is a tough one to get back in your case patience and a lot of trust building is in the future if you want to do this.
sweet

October 30, 2013 at 2:48 am

I’m on my 7th day of no contact and he hasn’t texted me nor called me. I’m beginning to wonder if he did love me during our 9mos together or was it just a one-sided love thing. I know i messed up but the only thing i’m guilty of is talking flirtaciously to my friend on facebook and that’s it. I miss talking to him. He was like my best friend. Yet I’m always the one to give in when we had minor fights. Hes stubborn and too proud. I had this feeling that he will never contact me again even after 30days.
admin

October 30, 2013 at 4:20 am

You are still sooo early in NC. Just take a deep breath and realize that.
sweet

November 13, 2013 at 7:00 pm

Hello chris! Some updates!
So 14 days of NC, my ex came knocking on my door unexpectedly. I don’t know who it was but when i opened, he was there standing outside. I asked him what he wants and he told me he wants to return the shirt he borrowed from me and i accepted it. Then he told me he wanted me back and the shirt was just an excuse. I couldnt say no. I was too weak. Now we’re back to normal but we really haven’t discussed about what happened cause he told me he wants to put the past behind us. He said he could still remember the words he had read from my chats very clearly but hes trying to forget it now cause its different without me.

So we’re back together and im utterly numb. I dont know where to go from here. I did asked him of his expectations but told me he didnt want to be too demanding and just want us to be happy again and move on. I hope i’m doing the right thing of breaking my NC.
admin

November 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm

Well you got him back haha I guess that is good. I am working on a guide on how you can keep him.
sweet

March 17, 2014 at 3:31 pm

Hi chris, so here I go again.. we just had our first anniversary last january and we went on a beach trip. it was romantic and spontaneous. we celebrated valentines day last february, romantic dinner with wine and such. but last week, we had a big fight and we broke up. he broke up with me cause he accused me of being someone who always calculate every expenses we had like dinner for example. he hates it cause he thinks im greedy. he even brought back what happened last time we broke up because of the “chat” thing. its really a lame reason but he called me names like im stupid and eventually i told him to leave me cause i cant take it anymore. he said okay lets break up. he was so angry and cold. i cried for a week and on 7days of NC. Do you think that there is still hope that we could get back together?
sweet

March 18, 2014 at 1:28 pm

Hey chris! I know you’re busy. Anyway, some updates: He just texted me today. He told me he was sorry and he didn’t mean to say those words to me. What should I do?
sweet

October 28, 2013 at 3:58 am

Opps sorry! Thanks chris. Anyway, i’m kinda scared cause he did tell me that he has a big pride and ego. I’m afraid if i wont greet him on his bday then by the time the NC rule is done then i will try of getting him back, he will be cold and pissed that i didnt even remember to greet him one. I’m torn up cause i love him and being with him makes me happy.
admin

October 29, 2013 at 2:06 am

All men have egos its just some are bigger than others. Stick with the plan.
sweet

October 26, 2013 at 10:39 pm

Thanks kris for taking your time to read and reply.
Anyway, Its his birthday this coming november 14. Should i send him a bday greeting by text?
admin

October 27, 2013 at 10:14 pm

Hahah it’s Chris!

I wouldn’t send him one no 🙁

jasmine

October 24, 2013 at 3:35 pm

okay so mine is a little different.I am actually still with my boyfriend and I have cheateda couple times in the past and he does not trust me anymore. I cannot go out I cannot see my friends because I cheated when I was with them. he’s not being controlling I just chose not to hang out with them because he doesn’t like it. but after seven months now I want to start going out again and he still doesn’t trust me. I haven’t cheated in almost a year and I want to build that trust back. we are engaged and I want to be his wife. I’m just not sure if it’s the right time to start going out again, cause it might break that bond that me and him have renewed… help!

admin

October 24, 2013 at 8:17 pm

I don’t get it… you are engaged with him?

Bianca

October 24, 2013 at 1:40 am

So basically I was dating a guy for 5 months, and we had gotten to the ” I love you stage” etc. One day he was going through my emails on my computer and came across the trash bin where about a week ago I had sent flirty emails to someone. We had talked and decided to try putting it behind us, however after sleeping over one night, he then told me he felt like “closing up” and “not letting me in” because he was still hurt. He understood and saw through the emails that I never actually went through with the cheating physically, and that I regretted it. But he’s unable to get over the fact of what happened and told me we should probably end things, and that maybe in the future we could try it again, if at all. While I removed him from twitter, instagram, etc, he still follows me however, and I wondered if that means he’s still interested, or that he isn’t ready to let me go yet? We’re in the NC and I really want him back….help?

admin

October 24, 2013 at 7:43 pm

It means he wants to spy on you and see what you are up to hahaha.

yolanda

October 23, 2013 at 9:03 pm

so i cheated on my bf who is now my ex, after he found out he wanted me to get back with him but i denied him, now how do i win him back, i really love my ex

admin

October 24, 2013 at 7:21 pm

Why did you deny him?

Avon

October 23, 2013 at 11:44 am

Hi Chris………..!!! I dunno whether you would read or not… I am in huge trouble. I am gay and i was dating this really sweet guy with a very impulsive nature… we dated each other for almost a year and then my college got over and i had to move out of my town. So, after 2 months of steady long distance relationship i went into hibernation… I wasn’t talking to him over the phone and one night I went a little off control… under the influence of drugs, alcohol and etc. and slept with my roommate who happens to be gay too. And post cheating i went nuts about it I was all into guys i did not even like… And these things were noted by my roommate… whom I had slept with… and he started talking to my bf and told him everything. He even requested him to keep it to himself and not to let me know I know that he has informed him everything. Now the situation is that I cannot even confess him and even If I do my bf would not even keep the friendship we have for now.

So, here i am…. I was late at confessing things because before it used to be him who used to cheat on me and every time he confessed it to me i forgave him. And I never had that courage to tell him all the wrong things i did. And later when I did confess he told me that he knew it since day one as my roommate had him informed about my every step, he forgave me but doesn’t wanna be with me anymore or ever. I was taken aback, completely off guard and now he has turned crazy and having sex with anyone possible talking everyday to my roommate and here I am still lamenting over him. I love him and I definitely want him back. I regret for the decisions i took earlier but nothing can convince him now. Please help me….. I am looking forward for your advice.

Avon

October 29, 2013 at 8:50 pm

but Chris I don’t see any thing positive there. What am I supposed to do…. I tried everything possible to get him back we unintentionally even had sex but he said that he likes my roommate and he doesn’t want him to know. And I am trying to act cool as if nothing happened.
admin

October 30, 2013 at 4:09 am

“unintentionally” huh hahahahahahahahahhaahahha.

Yea it isn’t looking positive. It looks like he is using you actually…
admin

October 23, 2013 at 10:15 pm

Have you started a NC rule yet?
Avon

October 26, 2013 at 5:04 am

I have now but then he came down to my city to see my roommate spending 300 dollars. I have just started that NC rule two-three days back. And now I ll have to see him/sleep/eat/watch TV under the same roof. I don’t want to look desperate just help me.
admin

October 26, 2013 at 5:56 pm

Just be a respectful roommate at this point.
Avon

October 28, 2013 at 5:35 am

I love him a lot but I cant see him doing things right in front of my eyes. Its too painful.
Avon

October 28, 2013 at 5:33 am

I tried but its really difficult i have quit my job I cant stay with them. See him trying to kiss my roommate. Its excruciating.
admin

October 29, 2013 at 2:08 am

Yea…. That is really tough. You got dealt a bad hand but I say try to take the positives from the situation. You are learning a lot about yourself and you are clearly a strong woman.
Avon

October 23, 2013 at 11:45 am

By confess him… I meant confront him(roommate)

Morgan Savitch

October 22, 2013 at 8:35 pm

Hi, im having big big problems 🙁
Me and my Ex, lets name him Jay, dated for a year and a half, and were in love and everything. We broke up in july because he was going to be a senior in high school and i was moving to college and he didn’t think dating was a good idea. it wasn’t a good breakup. and then i had a short summer fling with another guy, lets name him AL,that was also going to college because i wanted Jay to get jealous and it worked. so once college started i kind of stopped talking to AL and me and my Ex, Jay started talking again and everything seemed perfect, when i went home for a weekend, i saw him and we hooked up and it seemed just like we were dating again. then so a couple weeks later i tell him that AL and his friends are coming to my college to visit because our football teams are playing each other. well Jay got really upset and standoffish and so i stopped replying to him. and me and AL kissed that night while we were both drunk. but that was all that happened. after AL and all his friends left, i told Jay what happened and now he hates me so much. he wont talk to me, he says we are done forever. and i keep apologizing a begging him to forgive me. he keeps calling my a slut and saying that he should’ve never trusted me. all i want is for us to be together again, and i feel so sad and terrible. what should i do 🙁

admin

October 23, 2013 at 8:19 pm

You should do a NC rule immediately!
Morgan Savitch

October 24, 2013 at 10:09 pm

Thank you so much! okay so im doing your NC method, but do you think he’ll ever come back to me or no, 🙁
admin

October 26, 2013 at 1:03 am

Impossilbe to say but NC will improve your chances.

jen

October 22, 2013 at 8:15 pm

Hi so your website has a ton of great information. Unfortunately, I have to read about getting your ex back if you cheated. I made a huge mistake. Lets just say alcohol was involved and bad decisions were made and not with my boyfriend. my boyfriend has been my best friend for 7 years and we just stated dating a year ago. I cannot believe I made such a bad judgement call. I’m on the crazy phase where all I want to do is call him but know I shouldnt. We also live together. What do you suggest for couples going through this who live together? How can I be supportive to him during this time? Also, I know I need to work on myself as well before we get back in the swing of relationships. I have not been emotionally filled but that is a lot on me and work I have to do. I know he is mad as he should be and I know me saying sorry wont fix it. I have to show him but how does that work if we live together.

admin

October 23, 2013 at 8:17 pm

It is tough when you live someone. In your case you have to do LC and act like the most respectful roommate ever.

miku

October 21, 2013 at 9:24 pm

so i’m in high school and I have been dating my boyfriend lets call him Ed for about a year and ten months now I lost my virginity to him about 2 months into our relationship and I think I cheated on him some time in October of last year that’s about eight months after I lost it to him now around the time of the cheating I was young 16 and very very horny every time I asked Ed to have sex or try to get him into the mood he would tell me he was not horny or he would just let me give him head or at the very most sex for a very short amount of time and nothing else then I met his best friend I really cant remember who started flirting but one thing led to another and the next thing I know he is asking if I want to have sex kind of pressuring me so I start going along with it because i’m new to this whole sex thing so we make a plan to have him come over and we do the deed now for some reason I cant remember anything about it now time has passed and Ed gets a job so we are now only seeing each other about once a week and when we do he still dose not want sex so I started flirting with this other guy nothing happened just on line flirting and Ed finds it and has a melt down for a few hours but then tells me not to worry and that he loves me more then ever for not trying to lie about it when he found out but when he found out for some reason the memory came back that I cheated I think my brain treated it as a traumatic experience because I had truly forgot about it happening now that I remember it is killing me I really hate my self I get sick when I think about it and I cant sleep any advise I really wanna tell him but how first should I and second how any added advise would help to thank you also sorry for no punctuation :/

admin

October 22, 2013 at 2:35 am

Is his name really Ed?

Hahaha.

Alrighty, let see here. You are still young so take a deep breath and realize that the world won’t end if something doesn’t go right.

Secondly, I would actually try a NC rule!

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