How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back If HE Broke Up With You

1,328 thoughts on “He Broke Up With You And Now You Want Him Back”

Alicia

January 25, 2015 at 7:11 am

Hey Kevin…
My ex dumped me over a year ago, stating that I had been jealous and possessive towards him (when I truly was not). Three weeks later, he tried to apologize and asked to be my friend again… Since he thought it would not be fair for me to go back with him again after all the pain he put me through. I said yes, but never spoke with him again. Six months later, on a scholar event he showed off with his new girlfriend… I can say their relationship did not last, since I heard that she was such a complicated girl. I’ve un friended him and deleted any contact with him. I saw him last September by coincidence in a shopping mall but we did not speak to each other. Right now I see all the mistakes I did when we were together and I want him back…. Is there any chance? We have not seen or talked to each other for more that a year now 🙁

admin

January 26, 2015 at 3:40 pm

My name is not Kevin it’s Chris.

WAs this meant for another expert?
Alicia

January 27, 2015 at 4:22 am

No, sorry, I’ve got confused. I meant to ask you, Chris… Whops
admin

January 27, 2015 at 3:02 pm

You were talking to Kevin over at How To Get Your Ex Back Permanently? huh?
Alicia

January 27, 2015 at 3:50 pm

Perhaps that is why I’ve got confused… But no, I really meant to ask you. Anyways, I guess I’m not getting any chance with him, no matter who answers me back. Thanks :/

Alexandra

January 22, 2015 at 12:44 pm

Hi! What do I do if after(3 days after) I finish the no contact period we will meet at a birthday party. Should I text him first and meet at the party after? Or talk to him first at the party? And how should I act?

admin

January 22, 2015 at 5:11 pm

I’d say text first.

Tanya

November 27, 2014 at 2:24 pm

Hi, Chris! I was in LDR with my ex for 7 months. We met in my country, and had extraordinary connection. He invited me to visit him in his country. After talking for few months by distance, he called me “a woman of my dreams” (physically, brains and personality), and that he is totally head over heels. He was very special for me too, so I was understanding, supportive, caring, etc. We agreed to meet somewhere in the middle of our countries, and spent awesome vacations together in Europe. After that he asked me to visit him again, and I bought non-refundable tickets to his country for New Year. But he dumped me few days later. He said he had absolutely amazing time with me, but he doesn’t think he will enjoy one more vacations together as much. I have the feeling that all he wanted is just one “adventure” with me. (His behavior changed after our trip, he didn’t seem as much interested anymore, and then we had a fight because he got angry when I said I miss him and don’t see anything in return anymore.)
It was 2 months ago. I wasn’t acting needy, didn’t gnat him. When I found your site, I went in NC and completed 4 weeks. On 18th day he sent me a letter that he regrets of hurting such a fantastic girl, but he is just “incapable of love” (in general) and offered to be just friends. (So, I can still visit him). But how can I go to his country and act as friends if I have feelings for him and it all hurts as hell? I don’t want FWB situation. What do you think I should do?

admin

November 28, 2014 at 3:19 pm

Didyou read my LDR post yet?

Lauren

November 25, 2014 at 3:57 am

MY boyfriend and I are both 23. We had a perfect relationship and both constantly told each other we made each other happy. This was the best relationship I have ever been in – he gave me attention and affection and love and respect. However, I did get down during the relationship because I couldn’t get a job after uni – I felt like I wasn’t doing anything with me life. He kept trying to make me happy – and I said he does make each day better for me, but he can’t make everything all better. I started to bring him down with my sad moods and he eventually got upset and broke up with me because he couldn’t make me happy and he said he constantly gets down when I am down. That night, I visited my ex to get advise from someone who knew me well – he told me to stop taking my emotions out on my boyfriend. The next day I went to speak to my boyfriend and we worked things out – the week proceeding things were perfect. However, he found out from his friend that I visited my ex and broke up with me. He says he can’t trust me ebcause I didn’t tell him myself, and his friends say he stupid if he keeps dating me as a I probably cheated. I told him I didn’t and tried to make him believe me, but he is angry and won’t listen. He said with some space things might be okay. But I was stressing and now he says I have smothered him and his decision is final. Last night I told him that it hurts he doesn’t believe me and that I would walk away like he wanted. We haven’t had contact since – I deleted his number and his facebook. Will he come back or is his decision final? We haven’t exchanged out things – should I contact him to do that and then begin no contact?

admin

November 25, 2014 at 3:10 pm

It is strange to get advice from an ex. I mean, if my significant other did that i’d be a little hurt too but I think breaking up with you is a very drastic step to take.

I definitely think NC is the way to go…

Do not see your ex again though (the one you got the advice from.) We don’t want to rock the boat even further.

Catherine

November 18, 2014 at 3:42 am

My ex broke up with me about 2 months ago, we were only together for 8 months but I was in love with him. We got into little arguments most of the time over petty things and I’ll admit it was due to my insecurities and jealousy. I craved more attention from him, though he told me from the get go that he wouldn’t be the best boyfriend but that he’d try, I told him I could be a bit emotional and childish but that’d id try to tone it down best I could. We’d always talk about working things out until one night I found out about the death of my grandmother. I wasn’t extremely close to her but it affected me more than I thought it would, I got drunk and stayed at his house that night. He was playing his video games and I was on the couch. I got hurt that we were just sitting in silence and that he wouldn’t try to talk to me so I stated I was going to leave, He told me to catch the campus bus but I repelled and we got into a huge argument where I said things I didn’t mean, the night resulted in us going back inside in separation. I left the following morning and got a weird feeling in my gut. I apologized to him but this time I knew that it wasn’t enough, I could sense he was going to end things with me.The next couple days were the hardest, I called him one night and went over to his house and thats when he broke up with me. It was over. I miss him and I’ve tried to the not talking, the talking to him and nothings worked. I’ve been an asshole jerk in the process at the same time and I know thats pushing him away. I initiated the last text and we agreed to try and be friends this whole time but its hard when we both state we have feelings, but since he no longer tries to talk to me I feel like he’s over me. Idk what to do
d

October 28, 2014 at 6:35 pm

my ex boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago, we have still had contact he keeps telling me there is no way we are getting back together, we have a child together so i would have to use minimal contact, he also is inviting me to do thing’s together with our son, i’m getting mixed signals from him is it too late to use no contact?

admin

October 29, 2014 at 2:29 pm

Just use MC you can’t do NC because of your son but MC can be super effective.

confused

October 17, 2014 at 12:43 am

Hi, I really need some help getting my ex back.

Long story short my ex and I were together for over a year, but he has been in a different state for some job training for six months. We would visit each other when we could and when we were together things were AMAZING. We could literally go grocery shopping and be the happiest people in the world. When we were away from each other we would skype every night and text constantly. He would talk about all these things we would have to do in the future. Then two weeks ago he found out his job would require him to live closer to me, but would require him to travel for months at a time, so he said he didn’t think je would be able to give me the attention I deserved. He was crying as he told me this and I could tell he really didn’t want to break up. He kept trying to reassure me that I would find someone else but all I could say was that I only wanted him. He mentioned that maybe we could work out in the future and let’s play it by ear. He was literally everything I ever wanted and more and there was absolutely nothing wrong with our relationship. I know how he felt and he did not want to do this. All I can think right now is that I will never find someone like him, and in order for me to be.interested in someone else they would have to be an exact copy of him. Normally after a breakup I want the person back but deep down I know they weren’t right for me but I don’t have that this time. My gut keeps telling me that this IS the guy for me, we were absolutely amazing together. I was willing to work through the distance, and was even willing to move to the same state he was to be stationed out of so that when he was home we.could spend time together. He was fine with this early in our relationship but in our last conversation when I mentioned this he said, in true engineer fashion “i think moving for love is stupid”. He has always been very focused on his career but I know what we had was stronger. We are on good terms and text occasionally. Pleqse help me get the man of my dreams back!

admin

October 27, 2014 at 3:01 pm

Did you tell him that you didn’t care if you didn’t get as much attention when he said it?

Meredith

September 3, 2014 at 4:44 pm

Hi there, My relationship just ended a few days ago. I was very happy in it. I did not see it coming and I am still in shock. He had kidney disease and was hooked up to a machine five days a week for four hours. At the beginning, I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. I learned to support and accept it. Things were great and we both loved each other. A few weeks ago, he developed muscle spasms in his legs and could not sleep with me in same bed. I got a little upset and told him that it makes me sad. A week later I didn’t want to come over as it was 30 min. away. I got a little upset because I felt there was no effort and the bed thing was mentioned. He then called it quits via text message. My heart was broken and I went to talk to him the next day. I just cried. I can’t believe this. I am in so much pain and have started NC. We were supposed to be in Las Vegas right now, so these days are incredibly tough. This is a unique breakup. We never fought or argued. I feel so sad and guilty. Do you think he thinks of me? I love him so much. Never felt this way with a guy. Thank you.

admin

September 4, 2014 at 11:57 am

He probably feels he has no worth to you…

Amber

August 15, 2014 at 5:41 pm

Hi Chris. My ex and I broke up two weeks ago. We hadn’t been getting along for quite some time and it finally imploded. The only contact we had until right before I moved out was about the move. Then I went to a concert the night before the move, posting pics on Facebook (he’s not my friend on there anymore), and I got a message which knowing him I knew was snide saying, hope you have fun tonight, ill be gone during the times you requested hopefully everything will be goin by then. I didn’t respond. I moved out just as planned to get four texts that night from him saying where’s that decorative bowl my brother bought me, it was on the ledge and I know bc I took pictures before you moved, I want it back what else did you take?? I called him back, let him know that the bowl was in the wine room on the bottom shelf with Halloween candy in it and it had been there since October! He apologized via text. Lastly, he messaged me saying I had left a boot, I told him to leave it on the doorstep. Then I had a moment of weakness, I asked if I could say hi when I picked it up, he said sure if he was home. As I was heading over to pick it up and literally coming down the street he messaged me, I’m about to leave, I’ll leave it on the doorstep. I pulled up, grabbed my stuff, and rang the doorbell. He acted very short, hey I’m about to leave. I said ok just thought I’d say hi, thank you! I left, feeling so awful!!!! I had another moment of weakness and called him, asking if he was going in a date bc he acted so strange just now, he said no that he was just leaving. And finally I sent him a text that night saying this, you know to be perfectly honest with you when you said I could stop by and say hi I got excited, got myself all pretty and smelling nice. Thank you for showing me how much you really want this over and snapping me back in to reality. I have the upmost confidence that not only will I find somebody who loves me but truly adores me, I’m excited for my future. Wishing you the absolute best!! It has been four days since then and not a word. At first I didn’t really miss him, it was such a nice break from the conflict. It’s really starting to kick in now, I miss him. So Chris, my question is this, have I done too much damage or is it too late? And if not, what should I do now??

admin

August 18, 2014 at 12:20 pm

You’ve done damage but its not irreparable…
Amber

August 18, 2014 at 4:05 pm

I have not had any contact with him since then. What is your suggestion now?

Katie

July 14, 2014 at 3:24 am

My boyfriend of two years just suddenly broke up with me yesterday. Nothing in our relationship was completely unfixable. He did this to me about a year ago, both times have been out if the blue. He told me we weren’t meeting up emotionally. I being too emotional and him being not emotional enough. He said maybe someday we will work, like a year or so, but not right now. What does this mean? And what should I do?
Amanda T

July 13, 2014 at 12:08 am

Hi Chris! Long story short, my boyfriend of almost 5 years broke up with me because I repeated the same mistakes for the first 4 years; I was jealous, insecure, clingy, had no confidence, was harshly judgemental of his friends and family, I didn’t want to give anythinf a chance, etc. Anyway, I made no effort to change despite the mistakes I kept making. He had enough and broke up with me. Tommorow will be day 5 of NC and I’m still skeptical. I’ve never been in a situation like this before. For 2 months, I’ve gotten rid of all the issues I’ve had for years. I’m using your plan as my guide right now but the only problem is that he doesn’t want to believe I’ve changed.

admin

July 14, 2014 at 3:04 pm

Why do you think you committed those mistakes?

Kris

July 2, 2014 at 4:05 pm

I’ve been with my now ex bf for 2 months but we have been talking a while back before getting exclusive. He was a perfect gentleman, gives me flowers just because, introduced me to his family and friends, takes me out to dinner, even gives my mom flowers too. He was just perfect. We didn’t have sex because he wants to wait til marriage and I never pressured him. He always called me beautiful, did everything for me. Then one day he just told me he has issues he needs to take care of and it won’t be fair if he’ll drag me and hurt me in the process. I told him I will wait for him and I will just be there for him, and promised him I won’t hurt him. He said no. He asked to be friends because he saw how I’m a very “cool and awesome” person. I’m honestly really hurt. Today, I broke down at work and my boss told me to go home and just rest. I’m just really confused and I didn’t tell him but I was in love with him. I reassured him I won’t hurt him (his ex was mean to him and that was 10 years ago!). I thought I have found the one. He’s the best person there is and I can’t say anything bad bout him. Life is unfair sometimes. I’ll take him back if he wants to come back. But I won’t beg him back anymore. And won’t contact him. Ah, he was perfect. Lol. But I do hope he finds someone who deserves him. (Hello, Jeff, I’m talking bout you.)

admin

July 3, 2014 at 1:03 am

Wow, a guy that wants to wait to have sex… A very rare breed indeed.

Has he not gotten over his ex?

La Menefee

June 19, 2014 at 12:37 am

We had ups and downs bc of me .. I never saw the big pictire of why things happened. Our relationship reminded him of his past relationships … stressful

UPDATE : after our intimate moment I become overwhelmed with my emotions started texting and calling ALL THE TIME … I kept tabs on him ..he never replied, then one day he texted me saying he regrets ever proposing to me , it was a mistake , he didnt want to be with me , he didnt want me in his life, we couldn’t fix our relationship ..he moved on, didnt look at me the same ..I cried my heart out for days and days …one day i was tired of the tears so i deleted his number, pics anything that reminded me of him .. and let go.

UPDATE : We had NO CONTACT for over a month and some days now … In this time I been working on myself mentally ,emotionally and physically to grow … I been doing great, focusing on me … A few days ago I left my phone in, went for a walk and as i was coming in, i walked passed my phone, it vibrated & a text had shown up from a unknown # I didnt recognize… I checked it after a few mins, it stated ” Hey I kno u prolly think I was harsh on u..but dats something I didn’t wanna do but u drove me there..do hope u ok and still tryna work on u..” I re read it a few times and realized it was him, I had no idea he still had my number, thought he would have erased it … and it is definitely shocking & unexpected to hear from him .
Sara

June 18, 2014 at 11:31 am

Is it common for a guy to break up with you if a family member dies? When I told my friend we broke up she was shocked. He broke up with me a few days ago and my friend told me she found out his cousin had passed away that same week. He and I really love eachother it does get hard cause we don’t always get to talk or see eachother so it could’ve been a combination of that and his cousin dying. My friend could tell something was up with him by the way he was at work. Showing up out of dress code and then walking out. When he goes through things like this he sometimes will push me away. What should I do because I really love him and we get along really well. Normally communicate really well. I knew something was up cause the night he broke up with me he didnt really want to talk. I don’t know why he wouldn’t think I wouldn’t be there for him? What should I do? Do you think we may have a chance at getting back together

admin

June 18, 2014 at 2:09 pm

What family member of his passed?
Sara

June 20, 2014 at 2:17 pm

His grandpa. He has a really small family and was really close to him. He helped his mom take care of him when she couldn’t. My friend said that he still isn’t ready to come back to work and sounds more depressed then sad.

Deb

June 16, 2014 at 6:44 pm

My Boyfriend Broke up with me June 13th 2014.Dating 3-1/2 Years. He says it was him not me. He was married for 10 years has a step son his ex cheated on him, but he says the reason for us breaking up suddenly was that he screw up in the head because he lost his family and he feels that he can’t give to another family completely to me and my kids what we deserve he wasn’t there when I was having tuff time with my kids in school and he feels like he needs to sort out his head to be able to give to another. He want to be Best Friends and whenever I need him he will be there no matter what, but this is the only first guy I truly Loved, he completes me as a person, he kind, honest, trusting, he’s a hard worker, and he’s always says I am beautiful texts me every morning and every night or just text’s me to says that he Loves me. How can a guy be so confused after 3-1/2 years of dating. I did put him aside because my kids needed me I needed to focus on them to get them back on track and to support them in what they needed, I am sure he felt left out we started to not be very intimate together started to go over to his place less and less. I feel maybe this was my fault in many ways, but June 13th 2014 I finally got my kids back on track and wanted to get back on track with the relationship that we had when we first met, but he wanted to talk to me he had dinner with me and after the kids left he said that excuse that he’s out of town lots and I didn’t want to move the country and that was true I am a city girl, but I was willing to compromise, he feels we should have been a little further along in our relationship like at least moved in together, but every time I suggest it he kinda blew it off because of the kids. So I am confused. I am having a hard time with this because he wants to be Best Friends and I feel in my Heart he is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, but he didn’t seem like he wanted to give us a second chance, but wanted to stay Best Friends and would always be there for me no matter what how hard is that going to be?? Can someone give me some insight on this situation? Please I am begging anyone.

admin

June 17, 2014 at 8:28 pm

Have you implemented the NC rule on him yet?

Alex

June 14, 2014 at 1:26 am

I’m in an on-again/off-again relationship with a person who is completely incapable of showing affection. I continue to stay in contact with him & stay partially together with him because he is a very talented person in everything he does & is professionally driven. He is not threatened by my advanced education or career because he also has a great career. Also I have “needs ” that no one else can remotely come close to adequately fulfilling.

I know that there is no long-lasting possibility for happiness with him. He is merely keeping me on the backburner while searching for something better, then comes back when he is disappointed with the other women he dates. I also stay with him because I know the sex with others wi not be nearly as fulfilling, & that’s a big deal to me.

My question does not center around how to get him back; rather I’m curious about how people are able to do no-contact. I know the simple answer is to just not call or text, but I’m consumed with thoughts of him when I try not to contact him. I want to move on & get off this toxic ride, but I can’t stick with no-contact for longer than a week.

Any suggestions? I’m currently using a drunk dial app that prevents call & texts to or from him. Problem is that I constantly wonder if he’s trying to get ahold of me when the drunk dial app is on. Then I end up turning it off & ruminating on whether he possibly tried to call or not. When I don’t use the app then I have no willpower not to answer when he calls. I’d just like some advice on how to stop ruminating on contact with him. Exercise & hanging out with friends in my free time isn’t doing enough.

daniel

June 16, 2014 at 5:00 am

Honestly after reading your post me and you are a lot alike im trying the no contact thing to and it’s hard honesty if distracting yourself by hanging out with your friends isn’t helping read a book watch a movie spend time with your family go out and play a sport or workout keep a notebook write down your thoughts about him what you liked about him then write down the things you disliked about him maybe he would not spend time with you or would cheat or lie to you your doing this for you inside you know you’re to good for this person. No contact isn’t easy but it’s about you getting back to the old you. You were fine before this person and you will be fine after everytime you start to fixate your mind on him immediately think about something else maybe about buying a new outfit or look at different ways to improve you hope I helped a lil be strong though in the end it will pay off and you will be a stronger more confident person

Devon

June 13, 2014 at 9:42 pm

Hi. So my and my boyfriend of 9 months have been reeny fighting because insecurity issues. We always resolve them buy the other night I hung up on him and it really bothered him. I’ve noticed him being odd, and noticeably unhappy yet he always reassured me it was me making him upset. We went for breakfast to discuss the other nighs issue. He bluntly stated “I’m not happy, this relationship is doing anything for us” and proceeded to tell me that I’m his best friend and that he loves me but he’s simply not happy in the relationship and its not fair to pretend to be happy. He wants to be friends but I love him so dearly and we had an amazing connection. It was so out of the blue, almost a rash decison. Should I have hope on getting him back? Please help
Val

June 13, 2014 at 11:32 am

My bf broke up with me last night. He said he just not into relationship. Hes type of loner, he doesnt have much friends, and it was the first time he had relationship. He said he had been thungking about this. He said he doesnt like attention from others and he thinks i give too much attention to him. He said its not my fault but its his fault. He doesnt want me to blame myself.
But i just cant do this. I love him so much. I wanted to breakup through phone, but i said i want him to talk face to face but he doesnt want.
I dont wanna break up with him. What should i do to get him back? I cant move on! Please help me

admin

June 15, 2014 at 4:03 pm

That was his reason? B/c he is a loner?

Patricia

June 13, 2014 at 4:03 am

Hi. my boyfriend broke up with me last january. Then we got back again late jan. and he broke up with me on valentines day. i met with him a day after that and we talked alone in a room. i wrote him letters that was supposed to be a valentines gift and as he read them he cried. we tried understanding eachother and we got back. then eventually march came and he broke up with me again two days before my birthday. then we got back and he broke up with me again on april and may and finally june. i am inlove with him and i just cannot give up on him. he said he doesnt want to talk to me at all and that he didnt like me anymore but on twitter when we were talking with my friend about a guy who likes me, he tweeted ” flirt 🙂 ” and he and my friend argued. he called me up after not answering all my calls and texts and ge screamed at me. but after a while he called again to say sorry. then thats when he said he doesnt want to jeopardize his rel. with his friemds bec they told him to stop talking to me. and ever since i have been suffering panic attacks and i cant stop loving him at all. is there a chance for us to get back together in the future? I tried dating others but i really cant stop loving him bec i really really want and need him in my life through better or worse. i told him that we should try again and we did. He was really happy but then he just kept denying it. like he wanted to stick to whats in his mind even though he was really happy. Please help 🙁
beth

June 12, 2014 at 7:29 am

Hi my boyfriends broke up with me a month ago.it was kind of out of blue he said his feelings hadn’t changed just the situation (us not speaking a lot, doing a lot things together) anyway yo work together so I see him 2-3 times a week and he always asks me how I and smiles at me. And told me a couple of weeks a go he likes seeing me at work. Also I left some things at his and the same for him here nothing overly important but is it weird he hasn’t asked for his things and hasn’t offered to give mine back?

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1,328 thoughts on “He Broke Up With You And Now You Want Him Back”