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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
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The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
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Post categories
Diane
June 14, 2017 at 7:34 am
Should I reply to my ex, wishing me a happy birthday during No contact?
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 14, 2017 at 5:03 pm
nope..
Amy
June 10, 2017 at 2:56 pm
What if he wants to meet up a week after he broke up and says he loves me and wants to spend a day with me? Reason being because he might lose his job and if he does it might be the last chance to see him if he moves to another city? I have ignored his messages but wonder am I meant to respond, cause I don’t want to piss him off. I know I am NOT ready to see him. How do I communicate that or do I? HELP
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 14, 2017 at 8:56 am
If you’re in nc..dont respond..just let him..if he really loves, why did he break up with you
Anna
June 9, 2017 at 3:25 pm
Hey…I had a relathionship of 8 months with this guy..he was deeply in love with me .And we had a really bad breakup,he asked me to move out of the house and after that for a month we talked and he says that I need to repair things and yestarday he talked kinda bad with me and i got pissed off and stop answering and he says well I don’t wanna be with you,never and blocked me on fb.What should I do?Please help
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 13, 2017 at 6:47 pm
hi anna,
Are you going to do the no contact rule?
Rea
May 24, 2017 at 7:55 am
What if HE greets me on my birthday? Should I respond or should I just completely ignore it?
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 25, 2017 at 5:26 pm
ignore it..
Sarah
May 15, 2017 at 11:43 pm
Hi there,
So my ex and I had a great start to our relationship. It was happy and loving. We shared a lot of the same interests, were in the same major, and spent a ton of time together. I would describe our relationship as intense- with as much love and happiness, there was also a lot of fighting. Over little insecurities mostly, never any dishonesty luckily. I broke up with him twice in those four or five months.
In the six months we were together, I visited his family twice, and he flew up to see mine during our Christmas break. He’s two years younger than me, and ultimately the immaturity that brought got under my skin. So I decided to end it about a week after we got back to school from break. And from there it went horribly downhill. There was a lot of anger and pain from him. And it was hard for me too, since we are were in the same major and saw each other daily. There were a lot of arguments still, because although we were broken up, we couldn’t help but spend time together. And that ended up being horrible for each of us. We had some expectations of each other that were similar to when we were dating, however each of us failed to reach those because we, “weren’t dating and didn’t have to anymore.” He started lying to me about things, and I caught him a few times with prying I know I shouldn’t have been doing. But obviously that cycle continued because I had caught him once before and didn’t want to be played with. Eventually, by the end of the semester his grades had slipped so much that he failed out of our major. I was crushed that it had come to this because I wanted us to take the summer apart and hopefully come back to the whole things with freshness and open hearts to have a mature discussion.
While I was sobbing and apologizing and feeling hopeless about the whole thing, he seemed numb and unaffected. We agreed to give each other the summer to clear our heads and see where things were once the dust had settled. We said we’d keep out of contact for some time- the big NC that we had been needing. The day after we made that decision he texted me saying it was hard not hearing from me- I didn’t reply. The day after that he sent me a snapchat- which I opened but did not reply to. On the third day he sent me a message on snapchat- asking if I was just not going to respond anymore. I simply said that I’d told him before I wanted space to heal. After he opened that message- he blocked me and unfriended me from Facebook. I’m not sure if he’s blocked my number because I haven’t texted him.
He had plans to study abroad this summer. And on occasion I see pictures people post with him in them. And he looks like he’s having a great time- with lots of distractions. While I’m over here still trying to recover and just now not crying every day or at every thought of him.
It hurts to see those pictures though because I’m scared he’s forgetting about me. Or that the pain he’s supposed to feel will never happen because he’s across the world. I miss him terribly but set a date in my calendar to when I will reach out to him if he doesn’t first. I’m scared he never will because he’s stubborn and because he’s on this trip.
Is there anything else I should be doing? Will we have another chance to make things right or is the NC rule not going to work this late in the game?
I have a lot of things I have learned from this whole experience. And know that I have grown and could reapproach it someday and be a better partner to him. But I’m really worried that he won’t want the same.
Sarah
May 18, 2017 at 12:55 am
We have been in NC for 10 days. But probably 6 of those, I’ve been blocked anyway.
I don’t post much on social media at all. Occasionally I put on a snap story or tag friends in things.
I’m kind of improving but I miss him a lot. I don’t want it to be over for good. I’m just worried he is being stubborn but that it’ll help him get over me completely since he’s traveling across the world. It bothers me that I can’t reach out to him to talk when I have healed a little bit because he’s blocked me.
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 19, 2017 at 8:52 pm
restart the count and post on sites where the posts lasts, whether you’re blocked or not..check this one:
Your Worst Nightmares During The No Contact Rule
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 17, 2017 at 6:02 pm
how long is your nc now? how much are you improving and how active are you in posting?
Lisa
May 1, 2017 at 3:03 pm
I wrote in other thread about breaking up with my boyfriend of 4 years and after 3 years of being broke up I realized he’s ‘the one’ I want to be with. I told him and he says he’s not closed to the idea but he’s dating someone. We have been in the friend zone for 3 years, but very affectionate during that time, almost like dating without the sex. Since he started dating the other girl he his communication has dwindled but still friendly.
He still sends friendly texts but getting shorter and longer periods between. I’m afraid to initiate NC and completely ignore him bc he’s very (sweet) and sensitive and he will think I’m being rude. I think it has helped for us to be in contact bc he has helped for him to see the changes in me.
I’m afraid NC will push him away and make it easier for him to be in his new relationship. Do you still recommend NC in this situation or just short and brief texts and take a long time to respond?
Thanks for your help!
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 2, 2017 at 6:02 pm
yup..check this one:
Your Worst Nightmares During The No Contact Rule
Jmt
April 27, 2017 at 3:41 am
I’ve been in a relationship for 2 and a half years, he broke up with me march 27, 2017 and telling me that he fell out of love, that he’s tired of me, he’s not happy anymore with me. March 31, i chatted him on facebook, i invited him to come over to my 18th birthday party but he refuse because he doesnt want to be talk about by my girlfriends in why he broke up with me. April 3, the day before my birthday, he chatted me on fb “happy birthday :)” but i seenzoned him and after that, i begin a NC, and he doesnt communicate me first.. Would this still have a chance?
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 30, 2017 at 7:50 am
it depends more on how much you improve yourself during and after nc.. if you can build rapport slowly after while continuing to improve yourself.. And be active in posting in social media during nc too.
Tiffany
April 19, 2017 at 2:04 am
My long distance boyfriend of 1.5 years just ended things with me this week. I am a total wreck. When we FaceTimed he said he just doesn’t feel like he has it in him anymore and can’t do it. He also suffers from very bad anxiety which he says makes it worse. The awful part is I just got back from seeing him and we had a great Holliday together. Then we started bickering and fighting badly because I wasn’t receiving support that I needed as I’m about to graduate uni and he didn’t seem interested in me at all. When I told him if this is it to never contact me again and delete my pictures from his phone, he started crying and saying “why can’t we still communicate from time to time” and to never say never on us seeing eachother again, recently he blocked me on social media because he sees I’ve been trying to move on and it’s making him stressed he said. What kills me the most is that I (wrongly) went snooping on his fb and he was telling one of his guy friends 10 days after I had visited him after a fight that he thinks he wants to be with other girls in his life because he feels tied down and too committed, but that is not what he was telling me when he started crying the other day! I want to confront about those messages and how they made me feel because they’ve been making me so upset. But also I don’t want to break the NC rule. I am so heartbroken and don’t know what to do!
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 25, 2017 at 6:18 pm
I hope you stayed in nc
Rosie
April 14, 2017 at 1:47 am
My ex and I were dating for 4 years he broke up with my 9 days ago. (we’ve lived together for 1&1/2 years.) He said he fell out of love with me and he likes someone else. He talks to her all the time and it looks like he’s completely in love with her. It’s so painful. I tried implementing the no contact rule a couple of days ago, but when I went home yesterday to pick up some of my things I stayed too long (I’m staying back at home with my family) , just out of sheer desperation that our paths would cross, and they did, and I felt worse, and we had a nonsense conversation that didn’t discuss anything important really, and I felt worse off. Now I’ve had 6 missed calls he sent one text saying that it’s something important, but i’m trying the no contact rule. What do I do?
Also we’ve already discussed who’s moving out, what’s happening with our lease and bond money, and who keeps the cat. I don’t think we’ve missed anything. Should I respond?
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 16, 2017 at 7:37 am
nope you shouldn’t.. be active in healing and improving yourself. Check this one:
The Grass is Greener Syndrome For Ex Boyfriends
Loosing my mind
April 13, 2017 at 8:49 pm
Hi,I was in a relationship for 7 full years#my first bf n my baby daddy…things where perfect trust me,it was true love that every girl dreams of having.until I fell pregnant #things started changing n we would fight day in day out but he was always there wen ever I needed him.last year around July I had a baby boy n then things between if fell apart#i would hear rumors that he was seeing someone n I chose not to believe because I trusted him so Much n that was until I got them in bed in his place##i had my baby with me,I was a mess from there on#2 weeks later after I thought hard about this I told my stupid self that maybe we could fix things,I mean this is the first time that such thing has happened #to cut it short I went to him n he refused to fix things n told me he was done with me##but to my surprise he kept in touch n would come around to see the baby n I**well since I was so dump n thought that sex could fix things,I have slept wit him countless times n with no luck!!! As I’m rytn this I slept with him 2 days ago but he has no intentions of getting back with me,it was then that I told myself that this needed to stop,if I want him to come back I can’t make it to easy for him it was time for Mr to respect myself enough n stand tall in what I believe in..so since I still want him back I decided to start a nc yesterday n so far so good…but it scares me coz every time he comes by I just fall on my knees n would end up sleeping with him##so plz help,do I tell him to stop coming to my place n if he want to see his son I will drop him off n leave or wat do I do???I’m addicted to this guy,7years is a loooong time##HELP!!!
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 16, 2017 at 7:08 am
you need to go to professional counseling.. apart from try the advice in this one:
Get Your Boyfriend Back If You Have A Child Together
Mysty
April 13, 2017 at 6:34 pm
My ex recently decided he was done with our 2 and a half year long relationship. He kind of blindsided me with this news. The night before he ended things we were fooling around via skype. He was telling me how much he loved me, wanted to marry me, etc…. Apparently his son overheard him talking to me. It freaked him out that his son overheard and that’s what led to him dumping me. ( no he’s not married). I unfortunately got quite upset with him a few days later and sent him an angry text telling him how upset I am and that he’s hurt me because I love him and that I have always loved him. Long story short, he apologized to me but doesn’t want to continue in a relationship with me. He also said he still wants to be friends and that he still has “exciting” thoughts when he thinks of me and that he still wants me. I told him to stop toying with me and that I did not want to be friends. I started no contact that night. I am on day 3. It’s killing me. How long should I do no contact? I also sent an ugly parting shot at him. Should I apologize for that?
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 13, 2017 at 8:18 pm
nope, don’t apologize.try just two weeks..
Maria
April 12, 2017 at 3:24 am
Ive been doing no contact for 3 days now.. my ex just texted “did you ever **** that native guy” …. ummmm noooo never. Nor would I ever cheat on you is what I want to say… or just absolutely not. Do I respond to this??
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 13, 2017 at 6:06 pm
Nope, let it be..
Confused
April 11, 2017 at 6:46 pm
When my bf and I broke up, he blocked me a few weeks later on whatsapp. I understand why because we hurt each other a lot near the end with lots of accusations from both sides but it was clear we did still care for each other. On my birthday, he texted me happy birthday but still has me blocked on whatsapp. What should I read from that?
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 12, 2017 at 7:03 pm
maybe he was going to base it on your reply if he is ready to unblock you.. or he just texted you for the sake of greeting you but he was not ready to talk to you
Keara
April 10, 2017 at 6:20 pm
Hi I am happy I came across this site I really really neeed help, me and my boyfriend of 7years decided we needed to split a year in a half ago , I was the one putting in more effort he was out of work home depressed all the time accusing me of things because he was down and out, we had two kids and I literally had been in the house 24/7 carrying the kids and then breastfeeding I didn’t really want the second one because I wanted a social life but he promised if I kept the kid I could regain my social life after nursing. Once the second child was 1 in a half I started to go out with my girlfriends. He didn’t really have a social life and had cut all of his friends of saying they weren’t good for him anymore so once I started going out he was nagging accusing me breaking into my phone for no apparent reason and I would ask him why are you doing this to me? What have I done am I paying for what your ex did ? He caught her with a dude while they were supposed to be taking a break in there apartment. So his insecure bevhavior continued and I chose to end the relationship January 2016, we were still in contact for the kids but that was it, we decided to get back together after 6months I had been hearing of him seeing a few other girls but I couldn’t say anything we weren’t together. When we reunited he asked have I been anywhere else and I said have you let’s put everything out on the table he said ok starting with you, I told him that I had had an affair during our breakup after seeing pictures with him ands girl on iG I didn’t need love the guy or have any connection to him just had the sexual encounter, well that went all the way left we never got to what he did he fought me got really out of control screaming yelling and wasn’t pissed, I couldn’t understand it because we weren’t together so anyway we continued to try a shot and staying together everyday after was complete miserable everywhere I went he was accusing me he brought up the affair day in and day out he didn’t seem at all happy to Ben back we hadn’t some good Ayanna but more so bad and more bad and miserableness. I kept trying willing I inn if he wasn’t happy and couldn’t get over it we couldn’t end I thought I mean he had done things to but he was wouldnt tell on himself so I would never know. SO gen continuously tries to make himself believe that I wasn’t Dealing with this person when I wasn’t hanging out with friends for example we split and that’s so not true. He accuseme of being with his Dude More then I have and makes up some awful stories in husband head of this affair I had when we broke up. SO he said yes I’m pissed but I’m gonna tay and work through this. SO we went on to the second part of ur room relationship being back together for 4months one day he comes home From work take a shower and while he is in the shower husband phone rings its a plan name stored and has a heart and a ringmaster beside it. When confronted he say I haven’t slept with anybody else just talking to her I asked him why didn’t he be upfront wit him me and he stoped talking and froze up so I told him I couldn’t handle ignoring broke my heart and to was over. He left that’s nights and text me saying moving in with his brother and did I not think he was going to pay me back for what I did and says I cheated on him and he so hurt about it and want revenge and hates me and doesn’t want me back but will always love me. But I never cheated, so now we don’t talk or TextNow or see each other but hen he has to pick up the kids and when he does come to get them he tries to initiate sex with me and when I say no you have someone else I know it and will not belittle myself to sleep with you he get so pissed of and says you really not gonna give it to me I say no he says I know why because your back sleeping with the guy you had Ann affair wit him But I’m not. COULD YOU PLEASE SHED SOME LIGHT FOR ME IM SO HURT SHOCKED AND DEVESTATED AND FEEL SO STUPID FOR TELLING HIM WHAT I DID WHEN WE BROKE UP WE HAVE A HOUSE TOGETHER HE ISNT HELPING WITH BILLS CUTTING THE GRASS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING JUST SEEMS REALLY HAPPY WITH HIS NEW GIRLFRIENDS ALTHOUGH HE HASNT TOLD ME HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND DENIES IT AND HAVENT SHOWED HER.BUT IVE TALKED TO HER SO I KNOW I JUST WISH HE TELLS ME IS there any hope
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 10, 2017 at 9:00 pm
I think you need to calm down first.. and be more rational.. it looks like it’s starting to become a toxic relationship.. So, avoid adding fire to the fight by being less emotional. Check this one too:
Get Your Boyfriend Back If You Have A Child Together
Kelly
March 31, 2017 at 12:31 pm
Hello, I just broke up with my ex a couple of weeks ago. This was the second time I’ve told him I’m done , and it always stems from
Him not communicating with me. Whenever I try to have a serious conversation with him, he immediately gets defensive and start twisting my words and says that I’m trying to start a fight, so of course that starts fight. Anyway, we talked last night and he told me he loves me tremendously, he told his mom that he’s in love with me ( she told me this), and he told MY mom that he loves me too. Yet when we talked on the phone together, he instantly became defensive and angry with me again. And me, being the emotional female that I am, I broke down in tears and basically lost a lot of my self respect by apologizing to him for everything, and taking responsibility for everything. I’m still pretty upset with myself that I did that. I keep asking him if he wants to work on this or not and get back together, and his response is always “you already broke up with me so the choice is it mine”. No matter how many times I ask him if he wants to get back together, he just will not answer the question. Except to say that he loves me but he does not trust me to not break up with him anymore. Then, he proceeded to tell me that he was going to bed and would call me tomorrow. Leaving me sobbing on the phone with my pajamas on and no dignity. My biggest complaint about him is that he always makes me feel like I’m wrong and he is always right. I think I should implement the no contact rule, but I’m not sure about something. Do I need to tell him that I’m implementing the no contact rule? I even asked him if he felt we should take some time not talking, but even that got him angry and accusing me again of trying to start something and that he wasn’t going to fight with me. He’s incredibly stubborn. Incredibly unemotional. And I really would like some advice on if the no contact rule even works on guys who are so stubborn that they may not ever contact you just to prove a point even if they love you. I’d love your thoughts and advice on what I should do from here. Thank you much.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 31, 2017 at 10:17 pm
Hi Kelly,
There’s no guarantee that it will work but it’s better to do it than chase.. just start it and don’t tell him
louise
March 30, 2017 at 8:37 am
Hi.
my ex dumped me a month ago..well infact never dunped me but we had a little argument and he started to ignore me..even snogged a girl in frony on me..hes 40 for god sake!
anyeay it kicked off between us that night, and im afraid i turned into a text gnat and hes blocked me from contact now ( i wasnt begging him back i just asked him to be civil and wanted to know why he did what he did..ive not mentioned getting back with him)
im only on day 2 of no contact but i really dont see any hope of us sorting it out. why does he blame me and is ignoring me for something he did? i still love him
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 30, 2017 at 7:12 pm
hi Louise,
how did he say that he’s blaming you? He’s probably ignoring you because he doesn’t like confrontation
Jasmine
March 26, 2017 at 12:51 pm
Hey, I’ve had a very improving and fruitful NC period. So the thing is I’m approaching the end of my NC period (1-week left) and I have ignored three texts from my ex so far. In one of them he was asking how I was doing and saying that he was thinking of me, and the rest of them were just him curious why I’m not replying. Today he texted me asking why I’m ignoring him. He said he doesn’t think he has done anything bad to me and thus, he just thinks that I don’t want to talk to him anymore. That’s so far from the truth and I’m wondering if I should reply to him at this stage.
I can’t send an interesting first-contact message after ignoring all of his texts though, can I? Wouldn’t it be silly if I told him about that fascinating football experience I had the other day, after acting like he doesn’t exist for weeks? That would probably make him angry. I don’t want him to think that I’m not interested in talking to him anymore, but I don’t know how to keep the conversation upbeat and happy after acting like I don’t care about him at all. Should I just say I needed some time and apologise?
I don’t know how to initiate the talk. I’m very lost, what should I do?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 26, 2017 at 5:58 pm
Just tell him sorry,you got really busy in the past month with a lot of new things and then a smiley at the end.. if he replies, reply and then end the convo..initiate again with a new topic after 3 days..
Jeff
March 22, 2017 at 9:34 pm
So heres what happened with me. I had known this girl for 5 years or so. 5 years ago we saw each other a lot but werent dating exclusively. She confessed to me that she had a job opportunity in another state but would stay if I wanted to date her officially. During that time she also told me she loved me. I responded no. I wasnt in a place where I wanted to date. Anyway she moved and lived there for 4 years. She even ended up dating someone 3 of those years. They didnt work out and she moved back to her moms. During this time in another state we may have spoken about 3 total times.
Anyway, she moved back in october (her family is here) she moved in with them and we started hanging out again. Everything was new, fun, and exciting. I must say since october she hasnt had a job and was running low on her savings. She was searching for a job but not too actively. She told me she loved me all the time and that she foresaw a life with me. I agreed. And replied in kind. She then invited me on a vacation to where she moved to meet her friends and her sister/brother in law. On this vacation I knew i would encounter her ex since he was best friends with her brother in law. I suggested i didnt need to get on the flight and she insisted that i better or it was over. So, I went. The trip was for 3 nights with the 4th night to stay separate from the group and have our own day.
The 2nd day there she said i was being annoying and probing her too much. And she needed space. My way of getting a better understanding of how she was. So i responded that she invited me on this trip and i didnt know anyone and it would be nice to have her attention a little but. Any I believe the stress of having her ex around, me there, and the awkwardness it may cause her brother in law compiled to any little thing i did would annoy her immensely. I suggested i could fly home since i felt rejected and alone on the trip. I didnt. The following day it got worse. I brought up “its been a long weekend”. She replied yes it has cant wait for it to be over. I said ya me too cant wait till tomorrow when we get the day alone. Thats when she dropped the bomb, ” yeah i dont think this is going to work with us” again i never felt a feeling that bad before. I ended up sticking it out and stayed the 3rd night. The following morning She messaged me from the other room ” im going to go with my sister and brother in law, i think its best you go your own way and we can talk next week”.
I left to the airport bc i didnt want to be in the same state. I let the hotel go on its own and rebooked my flight. I was distraught, hurt, and completely lost emotionally. She stayed in the state for a few more days. I reached out to her a few times but not aggressively just wanting validation of what just happened. Of course i didnt get it. This went on for a few days.
About 5 days ago i decided it was best for me to cut all contact. (its been 2 weeks since she dropped the bomb). I deleted her from social media and cut text contact. TODAY my dog died. So I texted her since i knew she loved my dog and figured she may want to know. along with hey maybe it will open communication again. Anyway she called me and said she was sorry and concerned how it happened. We discussed what happened and she told me it was bc my probing was getting annoying and that anything i did just intensified her feeling of annoyance and wanting to get rid of me. She also said when i packed my bags and everyone else noticed it made things worse (i was never in that position before and i had no clue how to react). She said the space i gave her helped her think of things and that we should probably talk in person over lunch or dinner. She also said I do love you I just needed the space to think of everything. So this is where im at. I gave into the no contact rule. She said call her tonight if i want. And now im not certain what to do. Last message i sent her was “thank you for the talk, he (my dog) is in a better place now”
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 25, 2017 at 4:27 pm
Hi Jeff,
did you talk? I hope you got her back
Dana
March 22, 2017 at 9:10 pm
He broke up with me a couple days ago and since then we talked a couple of times mostly me initiating the conversation he made it clear that we are broken up and that he needs to be alone right now because his life is to revolved around me. What do I do if I have a class with him and I am on no contact, I have an option to switch the class, the question is if it benefits me that we do see each other ounce a week or not..maybe it will make him miss me more?
Dana
March 26, 2017 at 1:45 pm
I read the artical but didn’t really find it helpful… we talked yesterday (I initiated the contact) and he told me that he really wants to get back together but can’t, and that it drives him crazy that he made a decision and can’t follow thru with it, still insisting on the break up and that maybe in the future we will talk.. very confusing. Going back on no contact… what should I do? Last time I saw him in class he came to say hi and then got mad at me for not getting up and properly saying hi to him with a hug.. but still he doesn’t initiate contact thruout this whole time (it’s been 10 days at least since the break up).. and as I said before I can switch class if it would be the better option to not see him at all during this time
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 26, 2017 at 6:11 pm
have you listened to the podcast? can yoy manage not to initiate contact with hiin class, except for strictly class matters?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 25, 2017 at 4:19 pm
Hi Dana,
approach it like this one:
EBR 032: What To Do If You Work With Your Ex Boyfriend
SID
March 12, 2017 at 10:52 am
I and she were good friends and I started liking her. We used to hug each other in a romantic attire on all our bike rides. Never she wanted to leave me. Each time I had to leave the town on some work she misses me so badly. Texts me all the time that she was missing me please come back soon. We were so close to get into a relationship. All this happened for 2 months. She was with me each day all time. So I was very sure she had no other guy between us.
Suddenly a guy from her collage days came and proposed her and she started ignoring me. Then the guy left to another country but they are in contact with each other. They speak on phone till the midnight and sometimes till early in the mornings.
Also she started going out for dinners with different guys. Even if I say that some guy is not good. She responds to me like this: “He is good with me, I don’t care if he was a pervert”.
At our work place there came a rumor that she was dating one of our colleges. She got irritated and left the job showing me, the rumor was the reason she want to leave the job. But then she meets him outside for dinner some times.
I tried to convince her and she gets irritated. She stopped saying everything to me about her daily routines. she started having a secret life. If she is out with some one and if I call her, she doesn’t respond to my calls., then later gives me stupid reasons like “The battery in the phone was down”, “I kept the phone some where” etc…
She gets irritated even if I ask her simple questions like:
“Whats up?”, “Done with your dinner?”, “Where are you?, free in the evening?”
She stopped meeting me. Even if I plan something something like a party with friends, treck with her she drops the plan with some reason. I then saw some of your videos and tried not to text her. and tried to ignore her. It was hard though. But this is not happening.
After a day she texts me “good morning” along with other friends and we speak again and I get hurt for what ever she is doing again and again. She ignores me like anything and I get so disturbed and feel like useless.
Earlier if I go back to my place with out meeting her she used to feel bad and I came back all the way to see her excitement for seeing me, and we were happy. But now she hates to see me. She don’t answer my calls, even if I text she responds slowly where I can see her online status and she is busy texting some one else. She stopped sending the kissy smiles to me and asked me not to send her such smiley anymore. She doesn’t share her selfies with me anymore which she used to do daily and I used to complement her beauty, But she shares them with other people now.
My mistakes I realized after watching your videos are:
I tried to convince her and please her very badly. Tried to give a bad image of all the guys she meets. Which I stopped from the past 2 weeks.
Pleasing her not to meet few people as I thought I might loose her.
Pleasing her to like me like earlier as I like her.
When I ask her some thing she responds “Why should I answer you for everything?”,
She also started saying “Why are you trying to control my life?, leave me alone”.
She is now saying all the good memories were just a moment. she never liked me and It was my mistake to think that she likes me.
I am so confused about everything now. Have I been attracted to a wrong girl. But I liked her so much and she also liked me the same. Can I change her back to how we were earlier?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 15, 2017 at 6:28 am
Hi Sid,
you cant control other people.. if you want, do the no contact rule.. heal and improve..so you can reflect on what you really want..