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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
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peewee
August 16, 2013 at 10:25 am
am on the nc rule the 2nd day and feels like hell not talking to him.he texted me in my inbox in facebook and said,’hi,why are you so quite?’and never replyed.i feel bad.then a guy on fb posted on my wall,’hallo mrs lin’and i repled,’am ok my love’.i felt bad cause i wished twas him i told that,are there signs i will get him back?
admin
August 17, 2013 at 3:03 am
Its a fantastic sign that he texted you and reached out to you.
Ashley
August 16, 2013 at 4:07 am
I will try and make this short and simple. we dated 2 months. The first month was amazing because is was ALL about me then the second month things got a little more comfortable and he stopped putting in so much effort. I felt like his ex was trying to force her way back into his life, but he assured me he doesn’t response to her, they did see each other once recently and he said it was nothing more than an awkward hello and being at the same event. During the end of our relationship I was unhappy and he could tell me because wasn’t the same person I first fell for giving me his time and attention. I understand things cant always be that way but after 2 months that shouldn’t lack so quickly. He did express he let other things go when I came into his life like work and fitness and such. His work schedule as much pretty crazy lately and hours have been late for them due to the busy season. After we met and discuss things about 2 weeks ago he explained he work a lot and on his free time likes to do his hobbies but doesn’t understand why he cant be in a relationship and have those things as well. I explained I wanted to be included in his hobbies and make memories with him, its only been 2 months that’s should be normal to do. Basically it came down to us not reaching an agreement. He text me after and a few times the first week and I didn’t response to the first two attempts and then I did to the third. Since then he has text me about once or two a day and sends me emotional songs and when I replied back with a I cant stop listening to that song heavy heart :/ he didn’t text me but he continued to sent pictures of him working or other small things that make him think of me. I suggested to me up after a friend told me he said he misses me and it hurts him to text me. We met up last night and when I talked to talk about the relationship he said he didn’t expect to have this conservation but he was fine with having it. We discussed things that weren’t right in the relationship and talked through things which I felt like he wasn’t bending his ways and when I mentioned something that makes me feel unvalued he said he doesn’t feel like he should have to always answer to me, but if our communication was better I wouldn’t be left to wonder and chase his attention. He stated he misses me and likes hanging out with me, but he didn’t want to jump back into the title. He text me today with a picture of him at work late like he always means to do when he is working late and I responded back with a simple and light text, but didn’t get anything else back from him which is normal to not and doesn’t make me feel wanted. Do you think I should suggest a NC or just don’t response back to him or do you think it worth giving a week of taking things slow and leaving for starting fresh and easing back into a relationship would be possible? SO that wasn’t short but any opinion you have for me would be greatly appreciated. 🙂
admin
August 17, 2013 at 2:47 am
Have you ever tried anything like the NC rule before? I think it may be a good fit for your situation. Heck, I think it is a smart fit for 75% of situations.
Kiana
August 16, 2013 at 12:00 am
Hi Chris!
So I don’t really want to write a whole lot about me and my ex boyfriend’s relationship.. But we had gone out for about a year and we were the best friends before that. All of a sudden he broke like we were extremely happy during our relationship. It’s been literally 2 days since he broke up with me like the night before the first day of school. And today after school we exchanged a brief “hi”, then later he sent me a text saying that he’s extremely sorry about breaking up with me and he wants to be friends and all like I can go talk to him and stuff. I know that I shouldn’t talk to him at all in the future but how should I reply to his text? Or should I even reply at all? He said the only reason he sent the text was because I didn’t completely ignore him today… And I’m really sure unsure what to do? Should I ignore the text and play dumb like I didn’t even see it? Or should I reply with a simple “okay” and then just say I have to go? If I say that, I don’t want him to know that I’m doing this NC thing between us…What should I do?
I am super confused on what to do..
On the bright side, I have enjoyed reading all of your articles and by doing so made me feel so much better, like I can be in control of things.(:
Please let me know as soon as possible because if I should reply to him I don’t want to leave him hanging..
Thank you so much, Chris!(:
admin
August 16, 2013 at 3:17 am
I say your best bet is to do a mini no contact rule. So reply to the text saying something nice and then enter a 2 week NC period before you reach out again.
Hayley
August 15, 2013 at 11:44 pm
Hi, thanks for this guide. I’m 20 and my ex is 23 and we are both studying abroad. He is an emotional cripple but during the relationship he opened himself up to me, told me I’m the first girl he’s ever loved and has even cried in front of me when we would fight. We had a great relationship, everyone would comment on how great we were together. Lately in the last month I was very emotional and stressed and the relationship wasn’t as great as it was since i was stressed and so was he over family matters. But we both said that we were looking forward to visiting each other in our own countries (as we had booked flights to visit each other over the 2 months holiday). So when university ended and we both went back home after a few days he didn’t contact me anymore. Then we spoke on the phone and he said he isn’t feeling into it anymore as he has a lot to deal with at home and he can no longer come visit me and I cannot go to his anymore. I was shocked as I don’t understand how you can go from being so close to a person to ignoring them at all? I asked him if he was fine with not talking to or contacting me, he said yes. This gave me the strength to not contact him and its been 3 weeks so far. However, he hasn’t contacted me also and I’ve seen him online on Facebook every day. So one day before going out I posted a picture and I was surprised to see he liked it. Even when we were together he would hardly like any pictures. My question is why would he like it? How can I get him to miss me and want me back? I know he could never say the things to my face the things he cowardly said on the phone. The problem is we’re only back at uni late September and I have a feeling he won’t contact. Should I not talk to him at all during this time? I don’t feel I can as he broke up with me. But I want him back, what can I do?
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I’m very grateful for any advice.
admin
August 16, 2013 at 2:51 am
He liked the photo maybe to break any awkward tension you have. Or he really actually liked the photo.
Maybe you can contact him in two weeks or something to test the waters.
msela
August 15, 2013 at 5:07 am
this is good to me hope will help me coz break up with my ex boy friend en nw its abt a month
admin
August 16, 2013 at 1:54 am
Glad you like it!
Mindy
August 14, 2013 at 10:36 pm
hey chris i have been reading your website for the past couple of days on what to do… here is my story…
Me and my boyfriend were together for 2 years.. we broke up one time because of arguing and such.. and a month later we got back together…
Im pretty sure we broke up for the same reason this time.. its been a week and im trying hard to do the NC rule.. but wont that make him lose feelings for me? Will it make him think i dont care?..
I really want him back but last time.. i told him how we would be better and how we wouldnt argue, and how i wouldnt be so needy and treat him better then i did in the past…. he is never going to believe that i am telling the truth now.. that i will treat him better and not be so needy.. so i dont know how we would even get back together.. i dont think he checks my facebook.. cause hes being all happy on his.. and i know hes talking to people.. so maybe since he hasnt tried to contact me in the past couple of days.. thats him moving on and forgetting me?.. please give me all the advise you can.. i am really devastated. 🙁
admin
August 15, 2013 at 3:46 am
Ok well lets focus on you right now. B/c honestly that is the smartest thing you can do at this point. What are you doing to improve yourself during NC?
Mindy
August 15, 2013 at 9:44 pm
lastnight i saw that he deleted me off fb.. and then of course i called him cause it hurt me so bad.. he asked me then if i wanted to skype with him one last time and such.. i said yes… he had to add me back on facebook in order for us to skype on fb.. i woke up this morning and he deleted me again.. i dont know what to do.. 🙁
admin
August 16, 2013 at 2:46 am
NC silly.
Ally
August 14, 2013 at 5:53 am
Hi, I have a question for you.
I am 21 years old and have been dating my boyfriend who is also 21, for almost three years. We are both in college and we go to colleges that are one hour away from each other. Just three weeks ago, he broke up with me because he said he was unsure of if he was going to marry me, be with me forever, or just even the next few years. (We werent planning on getting married yet. We told each other that if we were still together in 5/6 years we would though.) He told me he loves me very much but he is confused because we are now seniors in college and soon the real world starts with jobs and it isnt just fun anymore. He has told me many times that he is afraid of the future and sometimes wishes he could go back to the past where everything was easier. I just found your website and I think its full of really good information! I was just wondering though, exactly what is the best way to get him back? Because we are long distance, I am afraid if I do the no contact rule it will be like “out of sight out of mind,” because he would never get a chance to see me or talk to me and miss me. I know that he loves me a lot but I also know that he is extremely confused. I know that he needs time to make this decision, but i also know that I want to be with him. What should I do?
Thank you
Ally
August 15, 2013 at 4:07 am
Thanks for your advice! Do you really think nc and meeting up with him a few times after nc is over will help him be less confused? Is there a way to make him be not so afraid to commit to me? Thank you again
admin
August 16, 2013 at 1:48 am
I think it is certainly worth a try. Nothing is guaranteed but it is worth a try.
I am afraid committing to you is something he needs to do on his own.
admin
August 15, 2013 at 2:42 am
I think for you, you are going to have to accept that this process won’t happen in a few weeks. It is going to take a while. The NC rule can still be effective in LDR. However, I think you will also have to see him at some point (in person) for this to really work.
shelby
August 14, 2013 at 1:44 am
my ex doesnt call, text or do any of that other stuff.. we weere together for 2 years.. and recently broke up.. does he not miss me then? or are there other signs to?
admin
August 15, 2013 at 3:51 am
He could just be super stubborn.
linda
August 14, 2013 at 1:46 am
my ex doesnt call, text or do any of that other stuff.. we weere together for 2 years.. and recently broke up.. does he not miss me then? or are there other signs to?
admin
August 15, 2013 at 2:08 am
It could be possible that he misses you but is too stubborn to show any signs.
Megan
August 13, 2013 at 10:14 pm
So my i moved to another state meet my now ex and we moved in together within weeks. He was in a very Vulnerable place since his brother had just past away and as was i being in a new state nlt knkwing any one .I was an instant comfort not just to him but the whole family. Everything has been great we got a dog were looking for a new place to rent, talking marriage and even babies ( we were trying) then out of the blue last week he told me he no longer loves me abd can’t see a future with me. This left me totally devastated I still love him so much. He says he’s been feeling like this for awhile but he thought it was just a funk and that was his reasoning for not saying anything earlier but he says his feeling haven’t wavered but what I don’t get is he was still saying I love you and acting like usual up until the day he broke up with me. Now he’s so set on Me leaving since I’m going to move to another state he realizes I can’t just pick up right then and there. Now he’s started this thing where his phones on silent and he’s always texting someone I really don’t believe it’s another girl because he would have had no time to meet someone new. I’m so hurt but due to the fact I’m moving to another state do I just let go? He’s said a few times well if you really are the one and I made a big mistake I might have to move to you this time I want to believe we were way stronger given we’ve been through sooo much but I don’t want false hope either. Do you think the ncr would work of the distance would be to much?
admin
August 14, 2013 at 3:00 am
Ultimately it is your happiness that I am concerned with. What would make you happier, having him in a LDR or letting him go and meeting someone new that you can actually see every day?
Kayla
August 13, 2013 at 1:23 pm
You probably don’t remember my message but i already wrote to you. We broke up 3 and a half weeks ago. He tried to contact me a week into the breakup. I didn’t pick up. He left me an i miss you/where the he’ll are you voicemail. Haven’t had contact with him at all. He owes me a $1000, which i would like to recover but don’t know how to approach that since we haven’t spoken for almost a month now. Also, I’ve been super down and jealous because he’s been talking to this girl for over a week now. They stay up on the phone til 4am talking. She’s 21 and he’s 30. Wtf?! 2 weeks into the breakup and you’re flirting and talking daily with someone else? I don’t know if I can handle this no contact thing. I feel like I’m going to blow. Can you please explain wth just happened and what do i do now. Thank you.
admin
August 14, 2013 at 2:20 am
I would straight up get the money. You may have to confront him and he is going to get angry. However, he does owe you that money and you are entitiled to it.
The new girl is kind of young for him huh? Though, I will be honest there is a huge allure to early twenty chicks for older men. The thing though is that this new girl could be a rebound b/c of the timing.
Tracy
August 13, 2013 at 11:06 am
Hi
Would appreciate your thoughts…..
Met a guy through online dating website. We were ‘seeing’ each other for about 5 months. I did make it clear in the beginning I was looking for something more than just a fwb. We saw each other about once a week/fortnight. Would go out for couple of drinks then I would stay at his. We have met a few times during the day also where no sex would be involved! The last few times we met we seemed to be getting closer, he started actually chatting about his family etc. Anyway about 3 weeks ago I said I would like to see more of him and what did he think about both deleting our online profiles and stop meeting other people. He said he was cool with it (said hadn’t been meeting others) – however it never happened. So last week I said that I wanted more. Wanted someone I could build something great with and to spend more time with. If not I would have to walk away as I didn’t want to still be in the same situation another 5 months down the line. His reply was that at this moment in time he couldn’t give me what I wanted. Didn’t want to hold me back so best leave things.
Now I know we were probably nothing more than friends with benefits but do you think there’s any hope with this being something more and maybe us getting back together, as I really do like this guy. The other problem is, he lives over an hour away so we couldn’t accidentally bump into each other, so he could see ow well im doing etc, he isn’t on social network sites either.
When we were together he only went online about once every 7-10 days, now he’s on there 2-3 times a day, for hours at a time at night
Would it be worth the ncr or should I just walk away?
Your thoughts and advice would be greatly appreciated
admin
August 14, 2013 at 2:00 am
Hi there Tracy,
I think you should try the NC rule absolutely. Really work on improving yourself during that time though. Make it about you and not him.
Tracy
August 14, 2013 at 7:09 am
Thanks……have done a week already.
Can’t believe it – got a text today from someone I met up with for drinks a couple of times about a year ago. He has sent the odd text, I reply but never mention meeting etc just ask how things are going. Now he wants to meet up again saying he’s now looking for more and would love to meet……. So looks like ncr can definitely work. Even if it takes more than 30 days lol
admin
August 15, 2013 at 2:51 am
Awesome Tracy, you are one popular lady 😉
mari
August 12, 2013 at 4:35 pm
So my break up was kinda mutual but the thing is its been 8 months, he has a gf idek if he really likes, plus we recently hooked up twice…well for 2 days he said he has love for me n has a thought about me every day n never wants to hurt me but my women senses are telling me its not over…we was together for 2yrs and this new girl only been with him for 4months idk what to do
admin
August 13, 2013 at 3:03 am
It seems he has feelings for you but he wants the gf and you at the same time.
TiffRN04
August 12, 2013 at 4:23 pm
My boyfriend of almost two years broke up with me out of the blue one night after I got home from work, about 6 months ago. We are in our 30’s, we were friends first before dating, and immediately became exclusive. We were living together in my home with his son and with my son, basically thought we had everything but the white picket fence. I thought marriage would be on the horizon, and instead, after thinking we had total commitment, he just up and left. When he broke up with me he said, “It’s just not working, we’re not a good mix.” His texts initially sounded angry when wanting to pack his things, and then stopped all together after a few weeks. I have been absolutely devastated, obviously suffering to not having any closure and him never responding to me. His sister told me she is certain there was not another woman. I have done the NC rule at least 5 times (in one month spats) and he never returns my non-threatening texts; from sweet to funny, to remember when’s, to me actually calling him once and leaving a voicemail to get together and chat. I am still absolutely crushed and feel there is no hope of him “waking up” and realizing what a prize I am and come back to me. I have been in NC once more for the last 5 weeks… I really truly am trying to move on at this point, but I have this constant reminder of his words, “If I ever had you, I would never let you go” and “My biggest fear is losing you,” and “I know there is no other woman out there as great as you, I have the best” and “one day babe your gonna marry me.” Help. What can I do at this point? I have never posted my story before and could really use some guidance. Thanks 🙂
admin
August 13, 2013 at 3:00 am
Wow, that is rough.
Generally speaking any time a guy breaks up with you out of the blue it doesn’t have to do with anything that you particularly did (well in some cases it does) but it has more to do with his inner thoughts about a flaw he sees. He is thinking about something that just bugs him. He can’t get this flaw that you have out of his mind anymore.
He literally doesn’t respond to anything you send? Maybe you should try extending the NC rule and really work on evolving yourself during the time. Maybe try a 90 day NC rule.
TiffRN04
August 14, 2013 at 3:30 am
Thank you so much for responding. You are right, I am extending the NC rule for at least 3 months because it is something he sees in ME or something he feels he can’t provide to me (i.e make me happy) that he is running from that he doesn’t like. I failed to mention the coincidence of just landing a huge promotion at my work the week before– I’m college educated, make great money, have a great house, told I am super pretty and funny, while he graduated high school and has a dead end job, and makes four times less than me. Obviously the semantics does not bother me, I love him more than any person I’ve known. But clearly to me, with all this behavior, HE may had a problem with it. That I could never change.
I have been focusing on myself, doing a lot of great things, working out 5 times a week, and fake being happy really well lol! But inside, I’m crushed and torn apart. A night I can just fall asleep in peace without my mind running circles is a great night.
I really appreciate your time and insight into my situation. 🙂
admin
August 15, 2013 at 2:14 am
I don’t know why guys get all antsy about a woman making more than them. I would kind of like it!
TiffRN04
August 12, 2013 at 5:52 pm
Added note: I still love him… thought he was the last man I’d ever be with. But as of today, he has never reached out, only to tell me a few weeks after the breakup in text, “Don’t cry for me because I’m gone be happy you’re not crying like you did when I was there. I only wish what ever you want in life, surely don’t wish anything bad. And no there was not, is not, and won’t be anyone for a ver long time!!!!!!!!!!” When I reflected on his comment about me crying, it is because I felt him withdrawing, not wanting to do some of his favorite things anymore, and I internalized it as him pushing me away. I don’t know….. I feel this is a lost cause now, after 6 months since our breakup. Please help… I feel I am optimist to a fault and he will come back. But really, after all this time, do I move on, or keep trying to open the door for communication? I feel by his silence he is making perfectly clear he does not want me in his life. I need insight, I’m not thinking clearly.
Hester
August 11, 2013 at 3:14 pm
Hey,
My ex boyfriend and I broke up about a week ago or so and it was him who decided it. We were together for about 6 months and it was a long distance relationship. He told me it just wasn’t working out. But then he told me that he still wanted to keep me around because I was about the only girl who loved him for who he was, and understood him. And he said that he didn’t want to lose that.He told me a couple days later that he still wants me to come to Texas to be close to him. He said he’d even help pay for it. He has also been putting up very depressing statuses on his Facebook page saying he is freaking depressed,sad and lonely. He doesn’t like the way girls act. I did contact him to see if he was ok and we talked for a couple of mins. But I ended the convo.After we chatted he’s kind of pulling away from me. I’m going to start the NC rule today because he is the one who ended it. I figured if he wants to talk to me or whatever he knows where to write. But the 30 days are starting today he made his bed so he can lay in it alone and let his missing me stir around in his head until it makes him insane. I’ve kind of gotten over it but I don’t think he has yet.
admin
August 12, 2013 at 2:31 am
All the more power to you!
keys561
August 10, 2013 at 9:31 pm
Me and my boyfriend dated for 4 years and we broke up about 2 weeks ago. Now we are talking and we had a deeper conversation last night. I called the conversation. Nothing I wanted to here from his mouth. Oh I got the I love you but we cant grow together. I confessed my love for him and told him I understood why we broke up. I took all the blame. This was done on purpose b/c I wanted him to think I believed it was all my fault. Well since than 2 days have passed and we talk on the phone. Not like we use too. He’s still distant and I wasn’t him back. How do I make him jealous? How will I know when this is happening? I just ended a conversation with him quickly and told him I was going out and would hit him later. I am the home body too I never go out. This should start his mind to wondering. Even though he acted as if it did not bother him. What do I do for the next step. I was thinking not calling back at all today and see if he calls. lmk
admin
August 11, 2013 at 3:29 am
If you want to make him jealous read this: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-make-your-ex-boyfriend-jealous/
Morgan
August 10, 2013 at 1:06 pm
This does not help
admin
August 11, 2013 at 3:14 am
I am sorry that it doesn’t help? Is there anything I can do?
Isabella
August 9, 2013 at 11:31 pm
Hi recently broke up with a guy over text and after we went on trip i know it was really stupid and mean to do im now regretting losing this person now he hasn’t contacted me but posted this up wondering what it means No matter the time, place, or circumstance, love will find a way. True feelings never stop being true, no matter how much you try to deny them, they are still there. This movie taught me that true love is one of a kind and if it is ever disconnected, if it ever connects again, you look past any errors others might see, any mistakes, or any flaws, and you never let go of what once was and now will always be. In the end, your love is all you have in life.
admin
August 10, 2013 at 3:23 am
Well said,
Is there anything I can help you with?
Lisa Heins
August 9, 2013 at 8:21 pm
I question him about cheating. He got angry and said he don’t care about us anymore. I decided to leave him alone. If he don’t care why should I. Anyway he’s been texting me and acting as if nothing happen. Confuse
Charlie
August 8, 2013 at 3:32 pm
So there’s this guy I’ve been dating for two years and we broke up, but we just started back talking. Howdo i get him to really missme because I do want him back bad, but don’t want him to know that. I want him to know I’m good without him.but I do love him love him to pieces.
admin
August 9, 2013 at 4:32 am
Ok, so if you are texting a guy you want to make sure you always leave him wanting more. Don’t be afraid to walk away from a convo premature b/c you want him chasing you.
catherine
August 8, 2013 at 1:29 pm
Hi..i juz followed the NC rule for a month and he started texting me again inquiring about me though i know he still doesnt want to love me..what do i need to do?? just to wait for some time or i need to talk to him
admin
August 9, 2013 at 4:22 am
If you have finished NC then you can proceed to start communication! Refer to the texting pages on this site to learn more about how and what you should be texting him. Admitedly I don’t do a good as job as I should have explaining this but I am rectifying that problem with an ebook which will teach you everything you need to know about getting your ex back. Think of it like this site x20.
I am still working on finishing it but keep an eye out for it.