7 Definitive Steps On How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Miss You

5,888 thoughts on “How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup”

Rijan

December 5, 2016 at 11:44 am

Hi, weve been together for 4 month but it’s like 4 years couse we alwayes bw together!at first he fo every thing that strat a realationship with me ,and i dont feel anything for him! But after 1 month i lied to him and he said hi cant forget and broke up with me ! But after 2 days he send messge that he cant live without me! We start again but for next time he said that my behavior change his feeeling and he didnt want this realationship any longer ! But i find that i love him and make him back by gave me another chance and he accepted !but he completly chang ! He text he calls he pay attention but his chang and i broke up with him and he showed that he is oke and we said goodbye! What should i do! I love him and i wnat him to com back!is there any choice?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 4:17 pm

Hi Rijan,

do you want to try the no contact rule?

Katie

December 5, 2016 at 9:39 am

I’m lost on what to do and hoping for help! Unfortunately, I didn’t find this page until after my breakup and I had texted my ex and replied to a text from him. We broke up because of a misunderstanding 3 weeks ago and he is very angry at me because he only sees what I did wrong and hasn’t acknowledged his part. When he texted me a week ago I replied asking if he was ready to talk about things and he said he wouldn’t be for a while. I have not yet apologized for my part in what happened and I am not sure if I should give him an apology letter before we leave school for a month for winter break. I think the break would be the perfect opportunity for a no contact period, but I’m not sure if giving him the letter before I leave will have the right effect. Any advice?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 4:03 pm

Hi Katie,

nope, don’t give the letter.. that would look like chasing.

Michelle

December 5, 2016 at 9:31 am

Hello, so my boyfriend just broke up with me just yesterday and I was devastated and shock and didn’t know what to do because we were just so happy when we were together and he just suddenly wanted to break up because he doesn’t feel the same way as he did before. He said he wasn’t ready for a relationship or a commitment. The day before he broke up with me he didn’t text me at all so I’m like all confused and didn’t know what to do then I just saw a picture of him with a girl on instagram so I got scared and jealous and started thinking what’s going on? I texted him and called him like a thousand times but he didn’t answer the next morning he broke up with me and said he just wants to have fun with his friends and not ready to be in a relationship. I mean I get it that he wants to have fun with his friends but I never say no to him whenever he wanted to go out and party with them I even encouraged him to hangout with them because I know that it’ll make him happy. Now I don’t know what to do I want some answers on my questions like we don’t even fight that much and I never thought this would really happen. What should I do for him to take me back. I really love him and he’s the best thing that has ever happened in my life.

Michelle

December 6, 2016 at 1:19 am

Hi I’m 20 years old and he’s 24 we’ve been together for four months. I haven’t tried the no contact rule because I’m really having a hard time. We still talk and he said he still cares for me but he just doesn’t love me as much as before.
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 9, 2016 at 1:52 am

There’s no guarantee that the no contact rule will work, but obviously, keeping on talking to him doesn’t work too right? It’s more likely putting you in the friendzone.. But if you do the no contact rule, don’t just stop talking to him, improve yourself.
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 3:57 pm

HI Michelle,

how long was the relationship? How old are you both? And are you going to try the no contact rule?

Laura

December 5, 2016 at 1:04 am

Hello,
My ex boyfriend broke up with me over a month ago. We were together for two years and I really loved him. At once point, I think he felt that way too. We were in a long distance relationship but we made it work. But a month or two before he broke up with me, he was stressed out because he didn’t know who he was anymore and he was starting school again so that stressed him out even more. I tried to be supportive. He would bring up the issue of breaking up as a hypothetical question and when I would ask if he was serious, he would say no. However, he tried to break up with me in person but faltered. Then 3 days later he sent me a text breaking up with me because he said he didn’t love me anymore and that I did nothing wrong. I have been trying to move on but a part of me hope that he’ll realize that he made a mistake. I also see him all the time at school. Is there any hope that he’ll come back to me or am I just kidding myself?
Thanx for your reply.

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 12:29 pm

HI Laura,

I don’t understand.. You’re schoolmates but you’re also ldr? And why did he only love you at a point in two years? shouldn’t you have loved each other all throughout? Or at least most of the time?

Rose

December 4, 2016 at 11:51 pm

My ex and I were together for a bit over 6 years. During this time we have broken up and gotten back together several times. We broke up again 3 days ago. I do want to take this time apart, but I still would want to get back together, and it sort of feel different this time around. I don’t feel he has the same interest on me as before. I am trying the NC rule, though it is still very soon, and I admit that I’ve been checking on him (FB, etc….). The holidays are soon approaching and I know this will be a hard time for me. If he texts me during the holiday, can I respond? or should I remain with the NC and ignored him? I feel like I would respond, but that’s me expecting that he will text.

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 12:21 pm

HI Rose,
Nope, ignore him..Check this:
How To Get An On Again/Off Again Boyfriend Back

Kelly

December 4, 2016 at 1:39 pm

I’ve been dating a man for 7 weeks. This were very good. We had net each other’s friends and had plans to meet the family at Christmas.
He told me a few days ago that he couldn’t believe he had met me and that he thought we would make great kids.
Two days ago he cancelled plans. Said he had been called I to work. We FaceTime instead.
He seemed distant so I asked what was wrong. He said that he liked me, had been happy with me and truly enjoys our time together, but he’s not feeling a spark. He behaved as though he was falling for me, so I’m blindsided.
He messaged me yesterday to ask how I was, and said he’d like to talk in person. I have plans to meet him this afternoon.
I’m a huge believer in no contact, but I’d like to see him to try to get a better read on him. Did he just pretend to be super into me? Is he reacting to cold feet and running?
I really thought this relationship had so much potential. Even the way we met seemed serendipitous.

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 10:22 am

Hi Kelly,

how did your talk went?

Synamint

December 4, 2016 at 2:54 am

Hi.

My ex broke up with me three weeks ago. It was actually a sudden breakup, well for him he says he kept on trying to maintain the relationship but he fell out of love and he loves himself more. We don’t argue that much, I mean we have petty fights but nothing major so it is actually very traumatic to me since he’s my first, I am his first too.

He’s 23 and I’m 28, he’s a writer and I’m an aspiring designer. The night before we broke up I opened to him that I miss him and got jealous to other couples; he got mad for me comparing him to them. It was actually a shallow fight since he even throw jokes and reminded me to sleep already. Upon waking up, he dumped me saying “i just don’t want it anymore, you are an ideal woman so bad that I am not an ideal one. I want you to stay in my life playing a different role, I’m keeping you at arms length because I don’t want you to be so attached to me because I want to focus on myself, I care for you a great deal but I don’t want any group projects–I am not ready to be in a relationship, I want to be the best version. I walked away as a boyfriend but I will come back as a friend, you did not lose me.” He even pointed it out that “I wish that being a lousy bf will invite the idea of you breaking up with me but f*ck it goodhearted lady why still chose to stay?”

He all said that with just an FB message. I called him asking him to meet up, he declined. I am super close friends with his bestfriends and he asked his friend to meet me the day on the breakup because he know I’m crying. For him to just dump me on FB for him is because it breaks his heart to see me cry, but constantly asking his bestfriend if I’m ok or not.

But sadly, it was a wrong move for me to console with his friends. I know, but I can’t blame myself because they are the only ones close to me, like I have no one but them. Sure, I have friends too but not as deep relationship with acquaintances. Of course, they seemed to be in balance until after a week after the breakup the “friend” tagged me in FB “one day you will realize why it never work with that person” quote with my ex. I politely asked him to remove the tag because it was so insensitive of him tagging the two of us after the incident. The “friend” actually is also a burden because he’s not the type of person who ask for forgiveness. Like last night he sent me a picture of my ex smiling saying “oh we are together right now” am I like “what’s that for?” Take note after the tagging I never send a message to that “friend” too, so it was like I lost two persons.

Well I tried NCR (I’m on my third week). I heard he wants to be friends with me through another person but he cannot yet for he sees anger on me. To be honest, my ego got bruised up too, because people who are close to me, even his sister said he’s stupid for dumping me that I should be the one to broke up with him because I have no future with him.

Today, I committed myself not to reply to his friends’ messages. I am actually working as intern while building up my own fashion line. Since there’s no proper closure, we are still friends in FB, people still thought we are still together because they’re asking me about him (for sure likewise), our pictures together and his writeups are still there so people don’t know we broke up–I don’t want to remove it because I don’t want to look bitter at all plus I don’t want people to know online.

The relationship lasted about 2.5years, like a week before the breakup my family invited him for a karaoke (like we gather almost every day with him and his bestfriends) so it is tough for me because the house feels empty. As for improving myself, I believe I’m working on it–like changing my look (because I used to be sweet looking girl and now I am trying to look more matured), I still look good, still doing nail arts, working on a future fashion show while doing a NCR.

While he, the way a source told me that he’s gaining weight, does not work well, ok not to mention a mess. He’s a full of himself insecure man, and I believe giving him space “to enjoy himself” will work for now. But despite of everything, I still believe he’s a good man and I want him back (not because I cried).

I know somehow he’s actually waiting for me to talk to him, but yes I am still on NCR and I want him to realize my value–he’s the type of “i love me, better adjust” guy; little did he know, I am after my ego too for now.

Thanks for reading and I hope I will be able to get a response.

Synamint

December 5, 2016 at 5:09 pm

Hi Amor and to the team again.

Yes, grudge for most people, but for him it is grit. Also, I just don’t get the idea of him saying I am a rare catch and there’s something special to me blah blah blah to everyone BUT he’s not ready for a relationship because he wants to enjoy. Does the idea of “enjoy” would mean drinking evey day or being a mess?

Duh, you know what, I thought it is hard to understand women, but men are much more complicated in my POV.

Anyway, I’ll take note of everything. And I promise to do my best to be the ungettable one–whether he will still be interested that time or not.

And I hope you will be proud of me.

Love,
Synamint
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 8, 2016 at 9:44 pm

That’s good Synamint! Even doing the no contact rule, is a hard step and doing it makes us proud but more importantly, you should be proud of yourself. 🙂
Synamint

December 5, 2016 at 8:07 am

Alright. 🙂 I’m obedient, so hello 30 more days. Anyway, just to let you know, he’s the type of guy who just receives every single negative words in each person. Well for him, in order to be successful you need to have a grit. Like you have to read him, unlike other people who’s actually black and white–expressive on what he wants, so this is kind of a challenge for me if I could still win him back. I think it’s a major factor why he broke up with me, that I didn’t notice that he will be like a bomb–a sudden explosion of emotions.

Do you think I still have a chance if I do another NCR? I’m just confused, like the breakup is too sudden it felt like I was thrown away from a high rise building.

Thanks Amor and EXBF team for listening.
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 5, 2016 at 12:35 pm

Did you mean, he’s understanding of grit is taking in every negative comment? I have a different understanding of grit though.. so, I don’t get that. It sounds more like he likes holding grudges. If you really want him to realize or regret leaving you, improve yourself, be the ungettable girl. That way if he knows you’ve moved on or moving on, he would be more open to start out as friends.
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 4, 2016 at 11:52 pm

Hi Synamint,

I think you need to restart the count of ncr and do 30 days or to start the count at the last time you talked to his friend.. If you last replied to him yesterday, start the count today.. And be very active in improving yourself and in doing new things..have a new routine that doesnt involve him.. Make new friends that have the same interests as you are

Kathleen

December 3, 2016 at 8:21 pm

My currently depressed ex dumped me two days ago during our eighth month of being in love. Neither of us have got this far in relationships before and he has admitted to being scared of losing me. He’s addicted to weed (I tried to talk him off it) and was so ashamed he couldn’t perform in bed (we had sex twice). He dumped me after concluding he couldn’t give me what I wanted as it included hard work on the habits which would ultimately lead to disappointment as I’d still leave him anyway as he’s not worth it. His mother died when he was 10 and it’s left him with some real issues and low self esteem (he has such a beautiful and caring soul). He says he needs me in his life and isn’t sure how we can be friends and I know he’ll miss me. During NC, if I refuse to reply even a word to his inevitable first message, am I not damaging things?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 4, 2016 at 2:35 pm

Hi Kathleen
the question is, does he want to change or does he want to keep doing what he’s doing and just keep you as a friend for support?

Kate

December 3, 2016 at 4:27 am

I ended things with my boyfriend after he couldn’t make a commitment to me or let me fully into his life. We were together for 8 months. He’s the one who brought up exclusivity after 3 months and wanted us to only see each other. His wife left him two years ago and he’s said that since then he’s been in a hole and has put up a lot of barriers- but that I’ve helped him break down so many already in the short amount of time we’ve been together. We’ve talked about our issue and he said he can’t give me what I need- so I told him I couldn’t this anymore. I’ve been patient and understanding but after 8 months, it got to be too much. It hurt me too much. Of course I still want to be with him. Is there a point in being hopeful? Will the No Contact Rule help in changing his mind in any way?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 3, 2016 at 3:55 pm

Hi Kate,

it can help increase the chances but there’s no guarantee that it can change his mind.. Especially that we cant control other people’s thoughts..

liza

December 1, 2016 at 3:53 pm

Hi I had a 5 year relationship we got suddenly much hassle and then made me ex it out. He says that still loves me but no relationship more would he would only give me all the debt are also why he no relationship more would. He want too be friends and him not to Baillie. I was angry and then I shouted at him but he remained calm but ignored me afterwards also. I still have chance should I now the nc do? or should I let it go help me out

liza

December 2, 2016 at 7:57 am

we break up 3 days ago he don’t want me anymore he say i still love you do now i do the nc rule en he put some pictures on he’s whatsapp profile with when you no that what you think in youre head is een lie in the heart so uhm yeah i think he want some attention but i dont give it
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 2, 2016 at 7:06 pm

Ok..that’s good because you cant reply during nc.. Be very active in improving yourself..
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 2, 2016 at 12:45 am

Hi Liza,

SOrry, I just want to make it clear. When and why did you break up?

Pam

November 28, 2016 at 5:42 pm

Why are my comments disappearing? Are they offending in some way?

Pam

December 9, 2016 at 1:16 am

Just reading my previous comment sounds crazy. He’s generally a terrible person I don’t even think we’d be compatible together. What is wrong with me? I need therapy for sure. Its like withdrawal when I don’t see him. Like drug withdrawal. So have to beat this addiction. I’m a loner though. I never like anyone and that’s if I actually meet someone. 🙁
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 12, 2016 at 5:34 pm

Then it’s time to make new friends. You don’t have to be an extrovert but it would be better if you meet and make new friends with the same interest, so that you can grow.
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 1:27 pm

HI Pam,

nope, I think something’s up with the site because you’re not the only one experiencing it but I do see your comments, I just haven’t reached them yet..

I can see you know that what you want is unhealthy for you.. Why not try professional counseling through a therapist?

Melissa

November 28, 2016 at 5:30 pm

My bf of one year sent me a “Happy Thanksgiving! I LOVE YOU!” Text on Thanksgiving morning, then was a no-show for our family dinner later in the day. I was furious and let him know that while I love him very much, I expect him to show up and be dependable. This is not the first time he has blown me off.

We get along great and have a wonderful time when we are together. We’ve been talking marriage for months and my kids all love him.

I have not heard a word from him since Thanksgiving and he never gave me the explanation I asked for. I am afraid to show myself as having too much fun on social media because I think he is convinced I’m better off without him. He’s said similar things before. Maybe he’s right but he is just a treasure to me and I think we have what it takes to be happy together for life. Help?

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 1:57 pm

Hi Melissa,
why does he keep blowing you off? Why not talk calmly first?

Nicole

November 28, 2016 at 4:47 pm

Hello.
So last week my boyfriend initiated the break up by saying that he doesn’t feel good in our relationship anymore…and that he feels trapped…I don’t think that’s the problem since I’ve been working and we have barely been together…its not the first time that we break up and that he starts with this kind of conversation…I start to think that he has emotional problems and is a bit unstable. Since he initiated the break up I was mad and said it was all over…Since then he sent me a message asking if it was really all over…I didn’t reply…and he keeps posting new whatsapp status related to my pics and saying for me to “remember” our relationship… what should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 1:53 pm

Hi Nicole,

talk first.. Tell him what you think

Pam

November 28, 2016 at 2:00 pm

He is sleeping with someone else
He told me he has mummy issues and now is sleeping with a much older, ugly potato shaped woman with pendulous breasts who is buying his BS. I’m dying he chose this over me. I just want to plead with him. And I have this need to still sleep with him just to prove she doesn’t mean anything to him. I’m so broken. Its Christmas. How can he say he has feelings for me and then still default to this mess. She even said to a friend it was just friends with benefits so how can I compete with that when my expectations are higher. I hate not seeing him. I’m sad. I just want to plead to him not to do this. Talk me down… what do I do here????

Pam

November 28, 2016 at 2:03 pm

I know if I did NC he will come back. I’m just feeling like I’m going to have a nervous breakdown lol. I plan to throw myself into business, diet and exercise but I feel obsessed. Maybe I need some meds. He’s being so distant.

Pippa

November 27, 2016 at 5:55 pm

I last saw my ex boyfriend a week ago when I stopped by to see his Dad. They own a cafe and I went for a coffee being 100% sure that my ex was away watching football with his friends in another town which he does without fail every 4 weeks, but he was there instead. I treated him with the same calm politeness, not over-friendly or familiar, that I’d treat a stranger and stayed composed although I did mention that I thought he’d be at the football that day like he usually is and he just shrugged then later he let slip that he knew I was visiting. I’ve decided to go ahead with 30 day no contact and stick to it but I wonder if I’ve already ruined my chances after that visit? I think he probably stuck around out of curiosity when he could’ve made any excuse to be absent but I don’t know if I should’ve left quicker than I did – I stayed for as long as it takes to drink a cup of coffee. The 30 day no contact period will finish at Christmas – is that a good time to re-establish contact or a bit too predictable?

Pippa

November 30, 2016 at 11:43 pm

Thanks Amor, on the day my ex ‘just happened to be there’ it had been 5 weeks since the break-up and 10 days since any texts had passed between me and my ex boyfriend and I’m proud to say that when he saw me I’d lost 16lb (which I’ve been trying to do for ages) and started an accounting course important to my career and although I felt nervous inside I feel that I handled the situation well – considering that I hadn’t planned to see him then. I’m sticking with NC until the 30 days are up. Sometimes it feels difficult but I’m keeping busy with my own things and I read articles (over&over) on this website when I feel like I’m wavering.
EBR Team Member: Amor

December 1, 2016 at 12:51 am

You’re welcome! That’s good! Be active.. Do new things.
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 28, 2016 at 6:39 pm

Hi Pippa,

No, you didn’t ruin.. Although honestly, it is predictable that you would text at Christmas..just dont text again the day after and keep improving yourself even after nc..

Haley

November 27, 2016 at 1:51 pm

Hi!
The times that I tried contacting my ex after we broke up he was a total jerk- obviously because I needed to give it space. He said we weren’t ever getting back together…I bought the Pro book and have been reading a lot of your articles!! After him being so hateful to me I finally started no contact..I have been silent for three weeks. I’m planning on gong for 50 days and maybe texting him at Christmas….Do you think that him being mean is just his way of coping?? We were together for a year and broke up over a c combination of fights, but he is manipulating all to be my fault which is making me really mad. I’m still hanging on to a little bit of hope. I have been pretty quiet on social media since we broke up and since I stopped contacting him.He is insecure which makes me believe that he won’t just go be with another girl because he is just comfortable with me.. I am going to try posting a really good picture and a picture of me having fun! I’m hoping the NC will surprise him that he hasn’t heard from me in a while…ugh. Any advice would be great!! Thanks!

Haley

November 28, 2016 at 10:18 pm

Yes, because of that and because he got into a disagreement with my mom…But she apologized and I apologized. I did the whole begging thing and offered to change and make things right and to be different so that we wouldn’t fight anymore. But he was not willing. However, I have never just gone silent before and cut contact, so I think that this will help. I haven’t done much work on myself besides try to stay positive..I’m planning on gong out more socially this week and to exercise more! I just want him to miss me and don’t know how. I’m gonna start being more active and posting some pics of me having fun on faceboook…I think he might be shocked once he hasn’t heard from me in a while. I don’t know though…We talked about the future together a lot, so its been hard to process that this is really over.

Thanks for the help!!
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 7:06 pm

Yes, that’s the right step.. You’re welcome!
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 28, 2016 at 5:47 pm

Hi Haley,

how much are you improving yourself? He broke up because he got tired of the fights?

Melissa

November 25, 2016 at 9:03 pm

My boyfriend and I dated for 5 months. Since our first date we clicked. It was sparks and we were inseparable. I felt like I had never met anyone like him before. 2 months into dating he asked me to meet his family. I asked him if he was sure since that’s a big step in any relationship and he said yes he was sure. At this point his family already knew about me. he took me to meet his entire family in Naples, fl where we spent 3 days at his parents house. They all loved me and said how easy going I was and sweet and down to earth. Keep in mind my boyfriend is a bartender on south beach. But he knew when he met me that I was very low key, not into the crazy nightlife scene or drinking. He also knew that I didn’t sleep around (I’m 34 and have only been with 6 men) he also knew I had only been in love twice in my life. All my friends considered us the perfect couple. We never ever got into a fight or disagreed on anything. Our sex life was amazing and I opened myself to him like I have never done with anyone. I always surprised him and baked him cakes and his favorite cookies. Even on his birthday the most amazing cake with a heartfelt card I wrote him (FYI I don’t do cards ever). This was 3 months in I mentioned in the card how amazing he was and how lucky I was that he came into my life and that I had truly fallenin love with him. He didn’t say I love you to me after reading it but said he has never had someone be son sincere and loving like I have been with him. We took a trip right after for a week down to key west Florida. It was amazing. When we got back he mentioned how easy it’s been dating m and carefree. That same week he told me I love you and that he was so grateful I came into his life and how proud he was of our love together. I would always send him cute heartfelt messages while he worked on weekend nights while I stayed home waiting for him. He always said I made him so happy. Months 5 I texted him I felt like he was the one and that I just wanted him to know that it was coming from a loving place. And not to scare him and he responded with I’m not scared at all. We always talked about having kids in general not together but that heras 36 and wanted kids. This is where things took a turn. He told me two weeks later he had felt overwhelmed by all the love and emotions we were sharing together and to slow things down. He said he felt selfish but maybe seeing each other once a week or every other week. He cried in front of me mega tears and said he felt like he might be making the biggest mistake of his life because no other girl has done the things I have done for him or treated him the way I have which was open, loving and just truthful of my feelings for him. Mind you. I was never the girl that was on top of him. I gave him space really didn’t call to much which he always said he loved about me. I played my cards right in this relationship because of past mistakes I had made in others. I didn’t understand where all this was coming from. I was really blindsided. At first I agreed to take things slow but then he became more distant and said he needed more time to think things thru. He broke up with me in October. I tired the no contact and failed at day 15. I texted him with I miss you and in less than a minute he responded with I you too babe. I texted back I miss our carefree fun times together and he responded with me too we always had fun. I gave in and asked if there was a chance within time for us to work things out, he responded with I don’t know babe maybe? I ended the text say I understand. Two days later I invited him to a show in December and he ignored me completely. I waited a day and texted him back saying: I love you with all my heart and I wish things could have worked out but that I couldn’t do it anymore. God knows for 2 months I have been trying so hard to make things work but that he needs to find himself in life and what truly makes him happy and that I hope one day someone would make all his dreams come true and that he will always have a special place in my heart. I’m so confused and need help!,,,,,,,,, he comes from a loving family he said he just didn’t know if he was ready for such a loving relationship and doesn’t understand why he feels the way he does. He was married once before when he was 29 and it ended within in a year. Then dated someone for 4 years a girl a lot younger than him and has been single for 2 years just hooking up with random girls nothing serious until I came along. He knows I am good girl with values and that I would do anything for him. Even his friends have said it

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 27, 2016 at 6:59 pm

Hi Melissa,

do you want to try the no contact rule? If you are going to do it, I think you should do 30 days.

Melissa

November 25, 2016 at 8:59 pm

My boyfriend and I dated for 5 months. Since our first date we clicked. It was sparks and we were inseparable. I felt like I had never met anyone like him before. 2 months into dating he asked me to meet his family. I asked him if he was sure since that’s a big step in any relationship and he said yes he was sure. At this point his family already knew about me. he took me to meet his entire family in Naples, fl where we spent 3 days at his parents house. They all loved me and said how easy going I was and sweet and down to earth. Keep in mind my boyfriend is a bartender on south beach. But he knew when he met me that I was very low key, not into the crazy nightlife scene or drinking. He also knew that I didn’t sleep around (I’m 34 and have only been with 6 men) he also knew I had only been in love twice in my life. All my friends considered us the perfect couple. We never ever got into a fight or disagreed on anything. Our sex life was amazing and I opened myself to him like I have never done with anyone. I always surprised him and baked him cakes and his favorite cookies. Even on his birthday the most amazing cake with a heartfelt card I wrote him (FYI I don’t do cards ever). This was 3 months in I mentioned in the card how amazing he was and how lucky I was that he came into my life and that I had truly fallenin love with him. He didn’t say I love you to me after reading it but said he has never had someone be son sincere and loving like I have been with him. We took a trip right after for a week down to key west Florida. It was amazing. When we got back he mentioned how easy it’s been dating m and carefree. That same week he told me I love you and that he was so grateful I came into his life and how proud he was of our love together. I would always send him cute heartfelt messages while he worked on weekend nights while I stayed home waiting for him. He always said I made him so happy. Months 5 I texted him I felt like he was the one and that I just wanted him to know that it was coming from a loving place. And not to scare him and he responded with I’m not scared at all. We always talked about having kids in general not together but that heras 36 and wanted kids. This is where things took a turn. He told me two weeks later he had felt overwhelmed by all the love and emotions we were sharing together and to slow things down. He said he felt selfish but maybe seeing each other once a week or every other week. He cried in front of me mega tears and said he felt like he might be making the biggest mistake of his life because no other girl has done the things I have done for him or treated him the way I have which was open, loving and just truthful of my feelings for him. Mind you. I was never the girl that was on top of him. I gave him space really didn’t call to much which he always said he loved about me. I played my cards right in this relationship because of past mistakes I had made in others. I didn’t understand where all this was coming from. I was really blindsided. At first I agreed to take things slow but then he became more distant and said he needed more time to think things thru. He broke up with me in October. I tired the no contact and failed at day 15. I texted him with I miss you and in less than a minute he responded with I you too babe. I texted back I miss our carefree fun times together and he responded with me too we always had fun. I gave in and asked if there was a chance within time for us to work things out, he responded with I don’t know babe maybe? I ended the text say I understand. Two days later I invited him to a show in December and he ignored me completely. I waited a day and texted him back saying: I love you with all my heart and I wish things could have worked out but that I couldn’t do it anymore. God knows for 2 months I have been trying so hard to make things work but that he needs to find himself in life and what truly makes him happy and that I hope one day someone would make all his dreams come true and that he will always have a special place in my heart. I’m so confused and need help!,,,,,,,,,

melissa

November 29, 2016 at 1:17 pm

I started the no contact all over again. I am on day 8. Lets see. He didnt event contact me for thanksgiving which makes the holidays all that harder. I honestly dont want to reach out to him. I feel like if he is so confused he needs to figure out that I was the most genuine person that he has ever dated. He event said it himself.
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 9:27 pm

Ok Melissa.. Take your time..
EBR Team Member: Amor

November 27, 2016 at 6:59 pm

Hi Melissa,

do you want to try the no contact rule? If you are going to do it, I think you should do 30 days.

anne

November 25, 2016 at 4:52 am

I’m reading ex boyfriend recovery for a while now. i tried to implement the no contact rule for 30 days and on the 15th he initiated contact and I replied. it turn into neutral. now i continue the no contact rule and he initiated contact again after 14 days. he said he want to meet me for a nonsense reason that he want his shirt back. it turn into positive but i replied neutrally. now i tried to contact him on the 30th day but it didnt turn out good. Can i restart 30 days no contact rule again ? does it will still work?

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 27, 2016 at 3:29 pm

Hi ANne,

yes, you can but be very active in improving yourself and don’t reply to his messages unless it’s an emergency.

anne

November 25, 2016 at 4:45 am

Hi, ive been reading ex boyfriend recovery for a month. and i tried to implement no contact rule for 30 day since the break up is not really that bad. but the thing is my ex tried to contact me in the middle of the no contact. And i thought it will be enough now but it wasn’t since the conversation turn out neutral only. and after 15 days again he contact me and wants to meet for his thing, but the reason of wanting it back is not acceptable bc he really do not need it. i broke the no contact rule for some reason for the 30th day. and the conversation went neutral and then he ignored. my question is can i restart the no contact rule and implement 30 days again? since it was a failed no contact rule.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 27, 2016 at 3:29 pm

Hi ANne,

yes, you can but be very active in improving yourself and don’t reply to his messages unless it’s an emergency.

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