7 Definitive Steps On How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Miss You

5,888 thoughts on “How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup”

TONIA

September 10, 2018 at 7:36 am

I enjoy visiting this site and reading the articles but I think my ex is part of the 10% who is unaffected by these tactics. He is notoriously stubborn and it’s like it’s a game of who can care the least. I’m not built that way. Feels like he will always have the advantage because of his stubbornness and unyielding temperament. He wanted to stay friends after the break up. I said no and he’s been punishing me every since. He’s dismissive of me and just downright mean. He never wanted to be in a relationship after being a bachelor for so long. I thought he’d be happy not being friends anymore. I feel like I never really knew him.

Chris Seiter

September 11, 2018 at 3:25 am

Hi Tonia!

Well shame on him for punishing you for not wanting to be friends after he instigated the breakup. So I do think NC will work. It will help you and just about every guy eventually comes around to some extent. And if he doesn’t and continues to be belligerent, then consider it a blessing that you are finding how he behaves when there are major disagreements.

Jo

August 29, 2018 at 7:49 pm

I have a question Chris,

So how are you meant to make your ex boyfriend miss you, want you back if;

1. He isn’t and never was on your Facebook. (Messenger that’s all)
2. You never see him or would ever bump into him.
3. He’s so stubborn, like unbelievabley stubborn. His mind is made up there seems no changing it, even though he’s told me he still cares. He believes once it’s broken that’s it (even though he messed it up)
4. You don’t socialise with his friends or ever bump into them.

How then can you implement any of this? I am struggling to see how getting your ex back will work at all when their mind is made up. I don’t believe he will miss me or think about me at all. It’s been 4 weeks. We’ve been in touch, went a 3 hr trip with him 5 days ago where he was acting like he wanted me back. Only for the next day to say he will never come back.! I’ve been in no contact since, so 3 days. I don’t believe he would miss me as he’s so stubborn and set in his ways. I go to the gym 3-4 times a week already, I’ve started a new high flying job and I’ve been out every weekend. I’m not sitting around crying or eating ice cream even though that’s all I want to do! It’s been a month and he’s not changing his mind.

Chris Seiter

August 30, 2018 at 1:26 am

HI Jo….yes that is challenging. I am glad you are doing things for yourself. Stick with your NC and reach out to him in the way I discuss in my program. Perhaps just the sheer number of days of NC will give him a wakeup call that he can’t continue to be stubborn to a fault.

Amanda

August 28, 2018 at 9:59 pm

My boyfriend and I met in 2015 on a dating app and didn’t actually begin dating as a couple until a year and a half later. When we initially began seeing each other we eventually had a talk where he didn’t want anything serious and I did so I walked away (completely amicable split). He ended up reaching out to me a week or so later countless times over a month (which I responded to each time) to chat or get together, but I would hold my ground on what I wanted and eventually he claimed he didn’t want to lose me so we started hanging out again and that’s how we started our relationship. At first, he was absolutely smitten with me – introduced me to his family, asked me to move in, told me he never felt this way with anyone before and wanted to marry me and start a family; I’ll admit, this was very flattering and the feelings were mutual. I had been burned pretty bad in the past and I did a lot of work on myself getting over that relationship so as not to bring any baggage forward but I think (reflecting back) I was guarded. Long story short – things on my end got crazy: new job, back to school, another job, moving in with him, new city, my car got totalled, health issues, etc. A lot happened and my patience wore thin and I hate to admit, I took it out on him – granted, he was busy too and very absent in the time I needed him most so the neglect only fueled the fire. Eventually, he lost interest in this person I became in the months this went on, and he became a person I no longer cared for either. We lived together but we were constantly forcing change within each other to be the people we truly are and once were. We broke up after a fight, a week before all of the stress was about to drop (school for me, school for him – we are in our late 20s) but also two weeks before a trip we had planned to meet his entire family out of province – A couple days later I asked for a second chance, after a couple days he asked me to come on the trip, the trip went really well, we came home, broke up three days later. In my eyes, nothing major happened, it just seemed like bad timing and poor communication. The trip went well but when we came back we didn’t have an action plan of how to get out of our rut. He claims his feelings have changed and he no longer sees a future with me. We moved in so quickly and we jumped the gun building a solid foundation to get us through the crap we went through. We still live together as I’m trying to get my things in order to make a move but in the past couple days he has completely come around. Texting me, asking me to do things with him, cuddling with me. It’s all very confusing. He spends so much time with me and all the time spent is exactly what we both were missing when things were hectic. I don’t know why he’s acting this way but there are so many rational signs that points toward him regretting his decision. Anyhow, I’m moving out soon and once I do I’ll begin NC. Our split will be amicable (maybe to ease his guilt for leaving me, who knows) but I worry about ignoring him when he reaches out to me. I 100% understand that distance makes the heart grow fonder, and I have no problem keeping distance myself, but I know that if he reaches out, and I don’t reply, he won’t reach out again, he’ll take it as a sign that I don’t want to talk and he’ll move on. I think he likes the idea of winning me over, so I worry about ignoring him and then popping back into his life when he’s the one who ended it. If he reaches out to me in a couple weeks I just don’t know how to read into it, or if I should.

Chris Seiter

August 30, 2018 at 3:32 am

Hi Amanda!

I think you made the right decision to begin NC. NC is adaptable. Give him a heads up that you are taking some time for yourself to heal and focus on being a better “you”. Pick up my 247 page eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book” (visit home page) as it walks you thru every angle of NC and exceptions and modifications according to your situation.

Shunika Buckles

August 21, 2018 at 10:08 pm

My boyfriend decided we needed some “space”. I’m only on week 2 out of my relationship and I am trying so hard to abide by the NO CONTACT rule (I had to restart once so far). How do I make this work if we both have belongings at each other’s house. I don’t necessarily need my stuff but eventually he’s gonna need his from my house. It’s his work equipment.

Chris Seiter

August 21, 2018 at 10:21 pm

Take some time before trying to do the personal belonging swap. You can eventually coordinate with him to pick up his equipment and schedule it so you are not present. As far as staying with your No Contact, consider picking up my ebook, “The No Contact Rule Book” and it will help you immensely with the overall strategy of your personal recovery and the ex back strategy. Feel free to go to my home page to learn more about the tools and resources available to you.

Candy McCall

August 17, 2018 at 8:35 pm

I was dating a guy for 2 months, long distance and everything was going great until he told me he needs to finalize his divorce and that he’s not ready for a commitment. I’ve been divorced for a year and a half and know the pain but he’s been married 23 years and separated one year. I think me pushing him to finalize the divorce put too much pressure on him. She cheated and wants him back. I think he’s confused. He did really like me but he needs to get things squared away. He asked me to give him some space to un*uck some things in his life. I’m going on day 5 of NC. think I should continue this or move on? I really care about him and would even move to his state to be with him, which is my home state. I’m so crushed by this one. We got so close since we had to communicate via phone and text. We even went on a weeks vacation together. Help!

Chris Seiter

August 17, 2018 at 9:03 pm

Hi Candy….it does sound like he is confused and is sorting thru his feelings. I do think you continue on with NC and feel free to tap into any of the resources I offer here in the form of ebooks, videos, podcasts, etc….all found on my home page!

Cassie

August 8, 2018 at 2:23 am

Do these work even if you’ve already done literally everything you’re not supposed to? We broke up a month ago, I didn’t do the no contact rule. (Longest I went was about 11 days) and when he came around and said he didn’t want to even try again, I went nuts and blew up how phone calling and texting and begging and pleading for him. To the point that he blocked my number. I messaged him on Facebook a week later and he again just kept shutting me down saying he has no feelings for me and had lost all attraction.. is my situation hopeless?
Louise

August 5, 2018 at 9:36 am

Your advice is fantastic however with My ex he has done nothing but act like he hates me! We have a child together and I am happy with the no contact rule however he only txts regarding our son and makes it super clear I’m not worth anything to him anymore. Might I add I am currently pregnant with our baby and very unwell so making a better me just now is a super tricky task! Any advice?

Chris Seiter

August 5, 2018 at 6:41 pm

Hi again!….sorry your ex is being so mean spirited. The time around a breakup can be hard on everyone and words and actions can get inflated. Hopefully,time and space will help settle down the emotions. But right now, your focus should be on your health, both emotional and psychical and of course your child and child to come. Be sure to draw in any needed support from family and friends to help you

Jordan

May 9, 2018 at 3:03 am

Hey Chris! So it’s been 8 days of no contact (incredibly hard) but I have done good. I have truly been happy, meeting old friends, seeing family (even getting a pedicure with my exes sister because we are close). Well I Snapchat everything, only every few days, and lately he’s been viewing them all… well today I did a Snapchat story and he viewed them, then I friended me from Snapchat… it really hurt, but, could this mean he is missing me and seeing me enjoying life’s is difficult for him? I read some other sites that said removing an ex from social media puts things into perspective for them ( they wanted a breakup so they’re getting one)…. well I decided to delete him off Facebook; 1) because I was constantly checking it 2) because I want him to truly feel my loss… do you think he is missing me?? How long does it even take for a man to regret his decision? Also, did I do the right thing by removing him from my social media? THANK YOU!

Chris Seiter

May 9, 2018 at 3:53 am

Great job Jordan! Yes, he should miss you and your value should increase in his eyes. There are different philosophies about removing people form social media. I think its better not to, but you were experiencing hardship by not being able to not check on him. After some time has elapsed, one of your “reach out” tactics can be adding him back. Think of it as a little breadcrumb leading back to you.

Tien

May 5, 2018 at 7:26 am

Hi Chris, I also have a question, I have a 3 year relationship with a boy and now we Have no contact with each other for 1 week , last week we had some argument about my characteristic like i usually keep control on him, he have not send message or contact with me at present, what should I do?

Chris Seiter

May 5, 2018 at 11:47 pm

Hi Tien….thanks for your question. First off…you have my ebook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”, right? If not, go take a look at it (click on my website Menu/Products link) as it will help you a great deal in all the steps you should take to optimize your chances. Being with a boyfriend for 3 years is advantageous as it creates some traction, which serves to draw the two of our back to each other. My ebook talks in great detail about the NC process and how you should go about initiating contact if it comes to that. One week apart may seem like an eternity, but it usually takes longer for people to experience healing. Perhaps your situation will take less time, but I strong recommend you read up on the process I teach!

Jordan

May 4, 2018 at 10:47 pm

Hey Chris! I actually have a question… my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me about a week ago. However, he left all his stuff (PlayStation, video games, his cat and even our dog). He continues to pay for dog food and told me I could use his PlayStation PLUS account and even his HULU and Netflix (I didn’t ask)… am I reading too much into this as a chance he will want to come back to me? It seems strange for him to leave so much. Should I give everything back?

Chris Seiter

May 5, 2018 at 4:22 am

Hi Jordan! I think he is keeping the line of communication and connection open. 3 years is a long time and a lot of roots established. So yes, the chance is there. Best to have a game plan as discussed in my ebooks (see my website menu/products link for more details!)

Anon

April 30, 2018 at 1:52 pm

The most weird thing happened… We were in the same class. After 3 months of no contact i left the class because i couldn’t take it anymore. In those three months nothing affected him. I tried all the tactics. A week after i leave, he unfriended me on facebook. Why suddenly? Now it’s been a month since i left classes but he hasn’t contacted me.

Chris Seiter

April 30, 2018 at 2:22 pm

Hard to say what is going on in his mind. Maybe some pent-up resentment.

Sylvia

April 29, 2018 at 4:16 am

Can these tactics work even if my ex and I live long distance, No contact for 5 mos, and he has a gf?

Chris Seiter

April 29, 2018 at 4:40 am

I think so Sylvia. I met and married my wife as part of a Long Distance Relationship. But your situation is admittedly more challenging. But you need a plan and an extensive guide that deals with the steps and psychology of a break up can optimize your chances. Just go take a look at my ebooks (at my website Menu/products link) and decide for yourself if any of my resources and services can help you out!

Felicia

March 22, 2018 at 3:49 pm

My boyfriend is a self centred guy. So he wants things to be done his own way and it’s a long distance relationship . I found out that he’s been cheating on me , I didn’t say anything because we hardly see each other and he’s guy he got needs. But then we just decided to break up. This strategy will help me
Carrie

March 12, 2018 at 8:22 am

Totally confused. What if you’ve gone through no contact twice and then after things seemed to be on the right track you get into an argument. The first time I went through no contact with my ex we didn’t speak for a year we dated other people and all. He moved out of state and we reconnected, upon reconnecting I vacationed in his city twice and we would casually hangout and when he would come home he went out of his way to see me, which led to him casually asking me to practically begging me to come visit him solo. Over the past summer I finally did so we spent 4 days together. On the 4th day I felt a negative shift in his energy towards me I tried to talk to him about it he said nothing was wrong. After him making sure I landed safely I didn’t really hear from him too much until 2 weeks later his cousin who’s marrying into my family informed me randomly that he had moved back home temporarily living with his parents. He hadn’t informed me and moved here 2 weeks after I visited. Then my dad ran into him the same day I found out at the gas station and he told him he moved but didn’t inform him I didn’t know. I felt like he ghosted me and I had quite the breakdown which he still doesn’t know about. We ended up speaking hear and their but never really talked about him not telling me he moved back. I eventually invited him to go to the movies with me which we had planned to do anyway when he came to visit next (before I knew he was moving) and he declined saying I have a full day already but thanks for the invite. I left it alone a month later he reached out we started texting and chatting on the phone and ended up hanging out which resulted in him staying over and we talked and I confronted him about how I feel about him not telling me he relocated we ended up cuddling all night and slept together the next morning. I didn’t hear from him again for awhile and when I finally did I was so hurt I decided to go no contact again to sort out my feelings. I went no contact for a few months and during the last month instead of reaching out sporadically he went full speed ahead texting calling dm’s on social media and I responded to none of it up until I was ready to reach out after the process. I reached on his birthday got no response I was hurt once again a week later he went full speed ahead a even asking if my cousin and his who are engaged said anything about bachelorette or bachelor parties past midnight. After a few weeks I felt ok to reach out again so I did. I sent him a snap of food that’s one of our bonds he text me we text periodically for about a week. Then a week of silence ended up over his parents house helping with wedding stuff ( his parents raised his cousin) as she’s a close friend, his mom didn’t mention he had a shift change and got off earlier instead of midnight he comes home I’m their it felt awkward a bit until we finished wedding stuff and I went downstairs and we ended up alone for a few minutes he automatically started messing with like a school boy has a crush on a Lil girl then when our cousins joined we talked about my brothers recent baby shower and he offered to buy him a babygift, mind you he hadn’t seen him in months than joked about going to the house with my cousin and drinking with my dad etc. As the night played on we all left and him and I discretely mad plans to hangout instead of coming right over he insisted on getting out of work clothes and showering. He over dressed unusually nice in a casual way nice jeans nice shirt. I currently temporarily live at home again also and withheld the information from him that due to my mild breakdown and his ghosting my dad wasn’t too fond of him until he arrived at my place. I didn’t tell him why I just had him wait outside until I made sure we wouldn’t be disturbed because my father wasn’t to fond of him at the moment. He looked puzzled but still came in and hung out we had a few beers and watched a few shows and a movie and talked and he tried to inquire about why my dad was upset. My best friend was texting me and not knowing who I was texting he tried to guess and made a snarky comment about another man texting me and appeared to be jealous. We eventually ended up playfully flirting and I kept rejecting it but he wasn’t taking me serious, he made a joke and it upset me ( but really I over reacted) so then he got upset and wanted to leave and said I should know better than to take it serious and that he hasn’t and will never disrespect me in the midst of it blamed me for us sleeping together we hung out last and that I have ulterior motives when we hang out which is total bs. So I asked him if that’s the case why was he here and he said it was because I’m a decent person and not hanging out with me when we mutually agreed would be a f*** you to me and I said I wouldn’t have taken it that way and he said he knows because I don’t think like that. After all that he still didn’t leave we watched a comedy special and he put his phone to the side saying he didn’t need it and anybody texting or messaging him at this hour isn’t important hes not gonna respond etc and made a comment about me being on my phone versus him putting his down and one of his exes after me who lived in his previous state fb messaged him and he kept assuring me she wasn’t important without me asking showing me all her messages or any others when his phone went off. He kept saying he was going to go but it took him 2 hrs he only left because I pretty much kicked him out I was tired. I walked him out and everything was fine until he asked why my dad didn’t like him again. I told him not to worry about it he wouldn’t let it go so I basically explained that my father felt that he disappeared on me and saw I was hurt. It became world war 3 he instantly got defensive and said he didn’t disappear he can’t help his work schedule etc and that my dad was wrong but I have to have his back even if he is wrong and then he had an outburst and said that’s just like when you stop dating a girl and his family is trying to suggest things to fix it but it’s not working and instead of them having his back because their his family they have hers…I asked him if that’s how he really felt he says it was just a scenario…he was talking about me for sure I failed to mention that his family and I our close his mother literally refers to me as her daughter in law and without me realizing it most times they do have my back but they totally have his as well. His parents would love to see us back together. But have respected other relationships we both were involved in after each other in the past . We’ve kept our reconcilings quiet only his parents and mine really knew exactly what goes on but not completely somethings are best left private. After he said that I asked if we could talk another time he said we had nothing to talk about went on another rant then said if I text or called wanting to talk he wouldn’t ignore me. I’m Anemic so in the midst of this convo he kept telling me to go inside so I won’t freeze towards the bed he got really upset and told me to more aggressively like a concerned parent. A few days later I reached out to meet up it took him a day to respond saying he was out of town. I never responded that was almost a month ago. Yesterday I reached out to him because we’re both foodies and my meal made me think about him so I sent him a picture he read it within 2 minutes but never responded. I’ve known him for a long while know and I really do love and care about him and I feel like eventually he’s supposed to be my husband but on the other hand I’m not so sure and have no idea what to do. We’ve been through a lot together and neither one of us is perfect and I know he cares for me too but is it enough my well is running dry I’m tapped out I don’t know what do anymore, please help me.
Carrie

March 12, 2018 at 8:16 am

What if you’ve gone through no contact twice and then after things seemed to be on the right track you get into an argument. The first time I went through no contact with my ex we didn’t speak for a year we dated other people and all. He moved out of state and we reconnected, upon reconnecting I vacationed in his city twice and we would casually hangout and when he would come home he went out of his way to see me, which led to him casually asking me to practically begging me to come visit him solo. Over the past summer I finally did so we spent 4 days together. On the 4th day I felt a negative shift in his energy towards me I tried to talk to him about it he said nothing was wrong. After him making sure I landed safely I didn’t really hear from him too much until 2 weeks later his cousin who’s marrying into my family informed me randomly that he had moved back home temporarily living with his parents. He hadn’t informed me and moved here 2 weeks after I visited. Then my dad ran into him the same day I found out at the gas station and he told him he moved but didn’t inform him I didn’t know. I felt like he ghosted me and I had quite the breakdown which he still doesn’t know about. We ended up speaking hear and their but never really talked about him not telling me he moved back. I eventually invited him to go to the movies with me which we had planned to do anyway when he came to visit next (before I knew he was moving) and he declined saying I have a full day already but thanks for the invite. I left it alone a month later he reached out we started texting and chatting on the phone and ended up hanging out which resulted in him staying over and we talked and I confronted him about how I feel about him not telling me he relocated we ended up cuddling all night and slept together the next morning. I didn’t hear from him again for awhile and when I finally did I was so hurt I decided to go no contact again to sort out my feelings. I went no contact for a few months and during the last month instead of reaching out sporadically he went full speed ahead texting calling dm’s on social media and I responded to none of it up until I was ready to reach out after the process. I reached on his birthday got no response I was hurt once again a week later he went full speed ahead a even asking if my cousin and his who are engaged said anything about bachelorette or bachelor parties past midnight. After a few weeks I felt ok to reach out again so I did. I sent him a snap of food that’s one of our bonds he text me we text periodically for about a week. Then a week of silence ended up over his parents house helping with wedding stuff ( his parents raised his cousin) as she’s a close friend, his mom didn’t mention he had a shift change and got off earlier instead of midnight he comes home I’m their it felt awkward a bit until we finished wedding stuff and I went downstairs and we ended up alone for a few minutes he automatically started messing with like a school boy has a crush on a Lil girl then when our cousins joined we talked about my brothers recent baby shower and he offered to buy him a babygift, mind you he hadn’t seen him in months than joked about going to the house with my cousin and drinking with my dad etc. As the night played on we all left and him and I discretely mad plans to hangout instead of coming right over he insisted on getting out of work clothes and showering. He over dressed unusually nice in a casual way nice jeans nice shirt. I currently temporarily live at home again also and withheld the information from him that due to my mild breakdown and his ghosting my dad wasn’t too fond of him until he arrived at my place. I didn’t tell him why I just had him wait outside until I made sure we wouldn’t be disturbed because my father wasn’t to fond of him at the moment. He looked puzzled but still came in and hung out we had a few beers and watched a few shows and a movie and talked and he tried to inquire about why my dad was upset. My best friend was texting me and not knowing who I was texting he tried to guess and made a snarky comment about another man texting me and appeared to be jealous. We eventually ended up playfully flirting and I kept rejecting it but he wasn’t taking me serious, he made a joke and it upset me ( but really I over reacted) so then he got upset and wanted to leave and said I should know better than to take it serious and that he hasn’t and will never disrespect me in the midst of it blamed me for us sleeping together we hung out last and that I have ulterior motives when we hang out which is total bs. So I asked him if that’s the case why was he here and he said it was because I’m a decent person and not hanging out with me when we mutually agreed would be a f*** you to me and I said I wouldn’t have taken it that way and he said he knows because I don’t think like that. After all that he still didn’t leave we watched a comedy special and he put his phone to the side saying he didn’t need it and anybody texting or messaging him at this hour isn’t important hes not gonna respond etc and made a comment about me being on my phone versus him putting his down and one of his exes after me who lived in his previous state fb messaged him and he kept assuring me she wasn’t important without me asking showing me all her messages or any others when his phone went off. He kept saying he was going to go but it took him 2 hrs he only left because I pretty much kicked him out I was tired. I walked him out and everything was fine until he asked why my dad didn’t like him again. I told him not to worry about it he wouldn’t let it go so I basically explained that my father felt that he disappeared on me and saw I was hurt. It became world war 3 he instantly got defensive and said he didn’t disappear he can’t help his work schedule etc and that my dad was wrong but I have to have his back even if he is wrong and then he had an outburst and said that’s just like when you stop dating a girl and his family is trying to suggest things to fix it but it’s not working and instead of them having his back because their his family they have hers…I asked him if that’s how he really felt he says it was just a scenario…he was talking about me for sure I failed to mention that his family and I our close his mother literally refers to me as her daughter in law and without me realizing it most times they do have my back but they totally have his as well. His parents would love to see us back together. But have respected other relationships we both were involved in after each other in the past . We’ve kept our reconcilings quiet only his parents and mine really knew exactly what goes on but not completely somethings are best left private. After he said that I asked if we could talk another time he said we had nothing to talk about went on another rant then said if I text or called wanting to talk he wouldn’t ignore me. I’m Anemic so in the midst of this convo he kept telling me to go inside so I won’t freeze towards the bed he got really upset and told me to more aggressively like a concerned parent. A few days later I reached out to meet up it took him a day to respond saying he was out of town. I never responded that was almost a month ago. Yesterday I reached out to him because we’re both foodies and my meal made me think about him so I sent him a picture he read it within 2 minutes but never responded. I’ve known him for a long while know and I really do love and care about him and I feel like eventually he’s supposed to be my husband but on the other hand I’m not so sure and have no idea what to do. We’ve been through a lot together and neither one of us is perfect and I know he cares for me too but is it enough my well is running dry I’m tapped out I don’t know what do anymore, please help me.
Vincencia

March 11, 2018 at 6:14 pm

This was the wonderful,in which it really touches me when reading though. My bf and I had a long lasting relationship, since 2012..when I am in standard 8 and he was my first person i came to know as love in my intimacy relationship. With all that trusts that I have on him, somewhat the situations turns to be so hard for me. It happens when I left him to take my studies abroad, in 2017,,and received a text from him that, he decides to break up with me. Without my last saying, we both just break up.leaving me in broken because of distance and time factors. I cant help myself,so what i did was, though am down i decided not to response to his messages and calls till now, and i did it…nc rule,,,,,and even in social media….i use to show myself that i am always happy,just to make sure he misses me,,even i always apply the jealousy tactics… I want to say that everything was said here, i did involved them without realizing it…And i am happy for myself..My question is, how is there any possibilities for him to get back to me???? Because all i did was,i just want him to miss me. Till i am still using those Techniques..

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 14, 2018 at 1:08 pm

Hi Vicencia,

How long have you been doing nc?

Lauren

March 1, 2018 at 3:57 pm

So I have a question. My Bf just broke up with me a few days ago because he saw me more as a friend. We’ve been together a year and we were both happy. He just said there wasn’t that spark. He also said when he missed me previously he realised he missed me like a mate. Not a gf. What if he does miss me in the no contact period but will always put it down to thinking it’s just missing a mate? Or could it be obvious enough to him in time that he misses me for other reasons? Another thing is that today is the first day of no contact but the past couple of days I had messaged and seen him. Will that affect the no contact period?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 4, 2018 at 4:56 pm

Hi Lauren,

That’s not a nc period if you kept contacting or replying or commenting back to his comments for you..check this one:
The Friend Zone: What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Just Wants To Be Friends

Jasmijn

February 27, 2018 at 9:22 am

My boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago by deciding to go on a break because he said he needed space and time to think. We were together for almost 7 months and everything was great until he sat me down and told me that. I tried giving him space (even though we live together in student housing). After a week we spoke again and he said he made a mistake and if we could just forget everything. He wanted sex and I said ok but only if he wasn’t going to change his mind again and he said he wouldn’t. The next day he told me he wasn’t sure anymore. A few days later the exact same thing happened.

I told him we should just break up for real and not date or anything in the meantime and he agreed wholeheartedly which broke my heart. He told me he is not having the same feelings for me he had in the beginning. Tune in to a few days ago when we had sex again a few times as in just sex (I knew what I was getting into). He spend the night in my room and in the morning we had sex again. Later that day (yesterday) he told me he wanted to wait with having sex again for a few days because it felt a lot like getting into another relationship again and he is saying that’s not what he wants (not with me or with anyone because he has adhd and depression and feels like he doesn’t have the space in his head/heart for it). I felt very rejected even though I acted like it didn’t matter to me.

Next monday I am moving out. Should I just implement NC now or start when I moved out. The way he is acting now it just feels like he won’t miss me at all if I go NC and he probably won’t text me since he isn’t a texter. But then again he is used to seeing me everyday since we live in the same house and me being gone is going to be a big difference for both of us. I want to take the time to work on myself and I need the NC period to do that. It just feels like he doesn’t care at all.

What is your take in all of this? I would love some more insight than just fragments of my imagination.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 27, 2018 at 12:14 pm

Hi Jasmijn,

Staying in contact is worse.. Do nc for yourself, not for him and don’t sleep with him again. check this one:
How To Get An Ex Boyfriend Back If You Slept With Him

Jacque

January 29, 2018 at 9:31 pm

My fiancé and I broke up last year. We were in communication after, but eventually I stopped reaching out. He messaged me back in Dec updating me on his plans of moving/getting a new job. I didnt respond. About a week later he blocked me on FB (we already weren’t friends). Then after a few weeks unblocked. Then a week later called. A few weeks later he called and was messaging me asking if I would talk to him. A week later a family member passed away, so I called to give my condolences. We talked on the phone for the first time in about four months. He again told me of new plans he has (these were different from the ones he told me a month ago) and asked why was I reaching our now, he had tried before and I mever responded. Basically telling me how he’s changed (he hasn’t I could tell). There was no talk of wanting to get back together or anything like that. During our relationship we had problems. He needs to get professional help, which he hasn’t. I know he’s on dating sites to hook up with other women. I just dont understand why he keeps trying to talk to me if he has no interest in getting help or wanting to be together.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 31, 2018 at 5:10 pm

he probably misses to talk to you but that doesn’t mean he wants to get back yet.. That’s common for an ex, that’s why most of them ask to be friends after the break up.

Amy

January 29, 2018 at 1:51 pm

I’m 2 months pregnant by my boyfriend a old friend decided to write my boyfriend on Facebook and tell lies because he’s mad I’m in a relationship with someone me and my boyfriend was working on it and getting our relationship back right but when he came home off the road he got mad all over again and broke up with me for good blocked me social media sites and he change his phone number after he txt me the other day

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 31, 2018 at 4:55 pm

Hi Amy,

Let him cool down for now, when he does talk to him calmly about the situation.

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