7 Definitive Steps On How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Miss You

5,888 thoughts on “How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup”

nika

April 18, 2014 at 10:25 am

hi

we just breakup last night with my bf and i want him back as soon as possible…..

ppllllzzzzz hheeellpppp ….

admin

April 18, 2014 at 3:57 pm

Have you read the stuff on this site?

Loni

April 18, 2014 at 12:24 am

My boyfriend came to my house Monday and because I was a brat he broke up with me. I pushed him into it because instead of being open to a talk about some issues we were having, I was mad and therefore, I was defensive and mean. The one thing he said he needs from me that I don’t give him is “me time”. He also says my timing is bad, which it is. Example we have a great weekend and Sunday morning I ask him what he meant last week when he said he was scared to love me. We each have a necklace with the other persons name on it. I called him this morning and asked him if I could speak with him and said yes. He came over, hugged me very tight, I spoke to him from my heart, I cried, he had watery eyes and he said that he is not throwing us away, right now he would like to take some time to think about us and what to do next and would prefer to not answer my question: can a be his lady again. When he left, he hugged me again very tight, kissed my lips. He also still had on the necklace with my name on it. I’m just so crushed and I know I can’t contact him now. We spent almost every night together for the past 2 months, we have spent time with his young girls together, he was told me he adores me, wants to make me happy, wants me in his life, don’t want to lose me, but I kept pushing for more and pushed him away. I want things back to the way they were last week and I’m so scared I have bombed badly. Any advice would be appreciated.

admin

April 18, 2014 at 3:27 pm

What were the issues?

lensymphony

April 16, 2014 at 2:32 pm

Chris Seiter you are very cute 😉

admin

April 16, 2014 at 4:04 pm

Thanks I guess…

Aren’t you here to get your boyfriend back though?

Abigail

April 15, 2014 at 8:27 pm

I have been in a 9 year relationship my ex cheated and I exposed to him to my parents about his cheating as they thought he was all innocent . He always said I was overreacting and hs stepmom actauly told me about him still seeing this girl. After I told my parents about his cheating he left,very upset and sais well I’ll show you what I wil do now ! Not long after that he got engaged and was suppose to get married 6 months later after the night I told my parents about him! Now it’s been 1 year ,we share a 5 year old boy and we stil on contact and he always have to chat secretively as his wife is not suppose to know. I am okay but sometimes I miss him so much and wants to know if he feels the same! He can be very rude at times especialy when he phones and his wife is around and then we wil end up arguing ! I miss him and wishes I can just get over him but also wants to know how he could move in so fast and not even look back???

admin

April 16, 2014 at 4:15 pm

You should have just approached him about the cheating and not involved other people.

Also, why did they think he was innocent?

Rupa

April 15, 2014 at 5:39 am

I followed the same.. we had a relationship of 2 mnths.. thn suddenly he has started ignoring me nd cut all communications.. I wished him on his birthday.. normal thank you I got in return… I knw there isn’t ny1 r8 ne in his life after we separated.. dnt knw about him.. but i miss him… I want our sweet relation back… what to do….. help me plzzz…
Angela

April 14, 2014 at 3:42 pm

I broke up with my X officially 2 weeks ago. He and I have known each other for 15 years, but just decided to get serious 1 1/2 years ago. It’s a long distance relationship we are separated by at least 5 states. I know that he’s wanted to be with me for years but I finally gave in. The past year and a half have been full of extremes. Either things are really well or they are not going well. We got into a disagreement after he returned home from visiting me a month ago. I was so upset I just stopped talking to him. He called and he texted just about every day for 2 weeks and then I replied back. Told him I was removing myself from our relationship because he failed to see things my way. I said I don’t want to fight I just want to be happy so I am moving on. He told me I was being silly and ended the text exchange by saying “I’m here when you want to talk”, I never responded and that was 2 weeks ago. So I guess I did break up with him. I ended up unfriending him on facebook I was so upset. Well anyway…it’s been 2 weeks and I haven’t hear a peep. I feel silly now. I realize that I love him and now we’re not talking. should I do NC and wait for him to call me?
Angie

April 14, 2014 at 11:05 am

I miss him so much, we shared 4 good years then 1year of him slowly leaving me and our new born son, who is now 2years old.. He supports us both financially but is not physically involved in our lives, meaning after we broke up . He stop seeing our son. He has moved on and had another baby. My heart is numb , my mind is dumb or confused. I still cry every night. For him (Doug) and it’s been over a year. I miss him and He knows that because I’m always telling him and texting him. He does call me and reply to texts… Depending on what I’m saying, but that’s it. I need advice or help because I hurt so much for him …. Crying.
Kelly

April 14, 2014 at 5:38 am

We’ll I am in the middle of a heart break. My boyfriend and I are in our mid 30’s and been together nearly 2 years. 6 months ago we bought our first home and that is when the fighting began. The stress of buying the house then moving in together was exhausting, then we began renovating which just added to the problem. 5 hours after I had finished the final piece of the renovations, his parents arrived from France to stay for 10 weeks!!!!!!!!!
Their visit was extremely testing for me as his Mother took over my house and was quick to tell me everything I do wrong. They were constantly in our faces and left us with no privacy.
The week after they left was great and he was in a great mood until we bickered that weekend and spent a day not talking. The next day he sat me down to tell me we have to break up as too much damage has been done to the relationship and it can’t be fixed.
It been a week now and still under the same roof together. I have tried telling him that it’s not the relationship that was bad but the circumstances we were in. And now that everything with the house is finished, we’ve adapted to living together, And his parents have gone, this is our perfect time to live a normal life for the first time in 6 months and just enjoy it. Again he just says the damage is done and can’t be fixed.
He is so stubborn that Nothing I say can sway him. He says he loves me, but if he really did surely he would want to work things out.
I am NOT willing to let this be the end. Please help!!!!
Kunia

April 13, 2014 at 7:36 pm

Hi Chris,

Thanks for all of the advice above. My BF of a 4 months has recently communicated a need for space — so, we’re not broken up as far as I know — slightly diff. than the above examples.

Details:
1. About a month + ago, I found out that I was carrying hsv1 virus (no symptoms) and likely had it since childhood — all the while under the impression of being “negative” for everything — even though I recently found out that hsv1 test is not included on your standard std screening.
2.Told BF immediately since I knew he specifically avoided contracting herpes in any form for his whole life and was worried about contracting it and communicated this when we first started sleeping together. He tested negative, retest is required for 100% sureness in 1-2 months.
3. After the negative result, he’s (understandably) still worried, but is taking it really really intensely. During our last (email) interaction, he communicated to me that he needs some time/space “until this passes.” I responded apologizing for unknowingly exposing him to this and for being the catalyst for all of this anxiety. I expressed understanding in his needing some time/space, and I expressed concern over his anxiety and recommended to talk to *someone* about this even if it can’t be me.
4. It’s been about 3 weeks since we spoke on the phone about the results, 2 weeks since he tested negative, 2 weeks since our last online interactions (lighthearted convos), and about 10 days since the email interaction detailed above (being nervous, needing space)
///THE DILEMMA/// As a person who has grown to care about him a lot and a person who…has a set of keys to his apartment, I am confused about what to do and how long to wait before I reach out again. do I wait til he reaches out to me? Because of his personality/fears, I wouldn’t be surprised if this recent obstacle was a dealbreaker for him…which I have come to terms with. However, right now, I have no idea what our status is and what I should be doing I know that we will eventually communicate in some way regarding our relationship status. How long do you wait before silence signals its-over!-just-mail-him-the-keys-and-say-xo-time.

I just don’t know how to interpret this and I’d like to do the right thing, whatever that is.
Any thoughts?

Appreciate it!!

admin

April 14, 2014 at 5:17 pm

So, you don’t know if you are broken up? I am confused.
Kunia

April 21, 2014 at 9:24 pm

I know, it’s weird, I can’t figure out what’s going on. I’m trying to give him space, as requested… but no we haven’t had a break up talk.

megan

April 13, 2014 at 8:08 am

My boyfriend (ex?) and I have been together for 6 years but for the past few months I feel like I’ve been forcing the relationship with little-to-no effort on his part. We’ve lived together in the past but other circumstances left us living separately so we only really see each other 2 or 3 days a week.

After realising that he didn’t seem into the relationship lately, I had a chat with him to find out what was going on. He said that he felt bored with everything in his life – with his friends, his college work and his job. So I suggested we take a break for a month, which he agreed to. I then clarified whether he wanted to take a break, or just call off the whole thing and he said that he just wanted a month’s break to figure out if he’s just taking our relationship for granted. He also clarified that he didn’t want to see other people so that isn’t the issue.

A week after this talk, I saw him at a party and asked how he was going. He said he’d been busy with assignments etc but had been good. When he asked how I was, I was honest – I was having a rough time. I don’t like playing games and pretending to be all happy when I’m not. I then said to him that if he feels like he wants to break up, to just do it. Don’t string me along.

It’s been 2 weeks since “the talk” and just over a week since I saw him/spoke to him last. I miss him a lot but have made sure not to talk to him.

I have a bad feeling about this whole thing. I love him and I think he loves me, but I think he’s going to end it because we’ve been in this ‘boredom’ rut before. I think that once he gets himself sorted and happier, our relationship can get sorted too, but I doubt he sees it that way.

Do you think there’s any way I can fix this?
Rhiannon

April 12, 2014 at 7:25 pm

Well this is really messy and complicated. My boyfriend and I mutually agreed to go on a break as he felt his depression from early teens is coming back. He felt he needed to get his job sorted after a chain of different jobs and he wasn’t sure where he was going. He wanted to gain more friends as he felt i was the only true friend he had. Before the break he took me to a rooftop spa and was so romantic, told me i was the one etc. a week later we went on the break. Two weeks after that i contacted him to find he had found new friends and they were teaching him a new language and now planning to go away for a while once he his confident with the new language, so he officially broke up with me. A month after no contact i saw him yesterday and had a brief talk (asked if we were ok etc) I was hoping he’d see me and still be attracted to me and may lead him to think twice about his decision, but haven’t heard anything since. Since we broke up some old friends of his who see him from time to time had told me has returned to some of his bad habits which disaperared when we were dating. (Gossiping and stirring things up between people) which i took as a sign he’s not happy with his life? I feel he took the first thing he found to distract himself from depression and the hurt from our breakup? Also I feel he wants to make his parents happy and proud of him as he is doing this for religious purposes (religious beliefs we both share). The country he is planning to go to does not permit our religious beliefs and if he’s caught there are severe consequences which he said he finds makes life more exciting. I really do not want to let him go, I felt he was the one for me and I’d never be alone again and it’s all fell apart in matter of weeks. I feel physically sick that I’ve lost him to this, even after a month has passed I’ve barely been a day without shedding tears, I love, care and miss him so much. I really don’t understand how he can cope from contacting me every single day to nothing. I get that he may be trying to find himself just the wrong way about it? A month with no contact, I’m now scared if I say the door is still open he will reject me. Part of me feels that he will continue due to obligation to finish what he’s started and part of me feels he will never get where he’s heading to anyway. What do I do now? I really don’t want to get even more hurt than I already am

admin

April 13, 2014 at 4:36 pm

When was the last time you talked to him?
Rhiannon

April 13, 2014 at 7:38 pm

Face to face was Friday. But before that i hadn’t seen or texted for about a 5weeks

fiona

April 11, 2014 at 5:16 pm

I must begin that i cheated on my bf with a stranger online. I never met the guy but my bf sniffed it, hacked my account and broke up with me. We did get back together and i worked really hard to get his trust back to the extentof sharing all my passwords n keeping him posted on where n with whom i was. It obviously was not easy n like i said i dont blame him. But he kept getting difficult and irritable and weould break up n then quickly make up. Breakups wid him were getting more and more painful and then whenhe suddenly without a fight decided to drop the relationship again, i decided i c told me nouldnt take it anymore. After a brief break he came back asking for us to getback but as usual doesnt really care how i feel. Since the bginning he has always been around when he has wanted, moody and erratic, one of the many reasobs why i strayed. I officially blocked him completely since a week but i miss him alot and i know we are gud together when he is involved and less selfish. I want him back but only if he wants to genuinely want to make it work. He tried contacting me a few times but he has stopped now. He does show narcissist traits and has blatantly told me not to feel bad if he starts dating. I hurt him but also aching n confused. I love him and want him ut i want to see the same from his end

admin

April 12, 2014 at 3:37 pm

….. with a stranger… isn’t that dangerous? You had to of known this stranger.

Speedygonzales

April 11, 2014 at 3:39 pm

I went out with a guy who is also a work colleague for 8 months (June 2013-February 2014). Our relationship was supposed to be a secret so no one knew about us. He was always so sweet, would come to my office even for just a quick kiss. Anyway, to cut the story short, we got into a huge fight because I told someone about us. He got so angry and told me not to contact him anymore. He blocked me on the MOC(Microsoft office communicator). When I called him, he yelled at me and said he did not want to talk to me. I got so heart broken so I blocked him every way possible; Facebook, Whatsapp, SMS, calls, MOC and even had my office phone number removed from the Shell system (we work in Shell). A few days later, he unblocked me on MOC and I received a request saying that he wanted to add me as his contact. I accepted the request but I had my status as Away the whole time..because I was so scared that he might say painful things again..but a part of me wanted to know what he wanted to say. But a few hours later I blocked him again. He went on leave the next day for 3 weeks. Usually he would tell me if he was going on leave. He just came back last week. I am still blocking him. But I miss him so much. I am wondering if he misses me too. And I am still wondering why he suddenly unblocked and added me as his contact. Wondering what his intention was. I still see him at the work place..at the car park..it has been difficult :’-(

admin

April 12, 2014 at 3:59 pm

Secret relationship.

What caused the secrecy?

S

April 11, 2014 at 3:08 am

ok so I was with my bf for 2 years we lived together the whole time. I would always treat him bad and when we would fight i would always overreact and break up with him and tell him to move out like he was nothing. Anyway, he ended up leaving one day after usually staying through my crap. I told him i loved him, poured my heart out, told him I would change and it wouldnt be that way anymore, he said it needed to happen now so I let it go for the day. He messages the next day saying love you and he rang but i ignored the messages and calls. I then messaged 2 days later saying ‘what do you want from me’ he ignored and i rang n he said i tried to call you two days ago dont worry anymore. (hes a bloody aries) and then i said sorry i wasnt playing games i was waiting to finish an important test before i confronted our issues. He said ok. Then i keep telling him i want him back bla bla and he says he thinks things will always be the same and never change. I said u need to try because we had two years and it wasnt always bad, we had some beautiful memories too. He said he still loves me and cares about me. So i met up with him and gave him his watch i brought him back. he was crying, i was crying. He messages the next day asking random shit like ‘have you found a house yet’ have the lawns been moved’ i replied obviously. then i msg saying what u doing the next day and he replies really short and i said if you dont want me to msg then i wont. he said he doesnt know what to say and that hes hurting still and doesnt know if he will ever get over it. anyway, we spoke on the phone today I said ‘should i move on? he said well thats what u want isnt it, he said if thats what you need to do then do it, i said well i want to know if you can see us together again, he said he doesnt know, i said okay i know where i stand with you. Have a good birthday (its in 3 days) and he said ‘stop’ i said stop what? he said i ddidnt want us to end like this, i said yeah well it is. and then i said im going take care bye and he didnt say anything and then we just hanged up.

im thinking i have to not talk to him for quite some time as he is obviously stubborn and hurting. do you think the only reason hes being like this and not willing to try is because he knows im here waiting for him? Im not sure what to think. i definatley want him back. i know deep down it would killhim for me to move on but i dont know what to do. do you think he will want me back?
Kate

April 10, 2014 at 2:13 pm

My boyfriend and I broke up after a year and a half. I broke up with him but he also agreed we needed time apart. We were working many hours together at our place of employment and we also lived together. The two of which took a toll on our relationship because we didn’t have much time apart. We spend two weeks apart with no communication, and then he asked me to come home. So I did, naturally. Things were really good for a few days and then we got into a huge fight and he told me he was done with me for good. Devastated, I moved out most of my things and found a new place to live. A couple of weeks later he asks me to come over so we could have an “honest conversation.” This was Super Bowl Sunday to be exact. So I did. We ended up not talking about any issues and I ended up staying with him. After a few days he said he didn’t want to get back into a relationship right now, but wanted to take things a day at a time. I agreed. After a month of dinner dates, movie nights, shopping trips, and spending the night he says he wants time alone. I stayed with him on a Saturday and on Sunday evening he decided this. No warning signs or anything that this was coming. He wouldn’t give me an explanation for it and all he would say was that he needed this for himself and he was happier alone right now. I don’t know what to do. I’m in love with him but he doesn’t want to see or hear from me and it sucks. Especially going from dating and living together to living separately and not talking or seeing one another at all. Help.
Monique

April 10, 2014 at 6:42 am

Hi, I feel pretty weird doing this but I need some help. I’ve been with my boyfriend (now my ex) for 6 months and he broke up with me 6 days ago. The reason why he broke up with me is because he is always busy with college and work, and he is trying to go to a prestigious university which means that he will be rarely available. He said that I’m the first girl he has ever loved and also the longest relationship he ever has have, but he cannot make me happy and I deserve better than that. He said that he is letting me and himself down… I insisted during two days, but since he couldn’t make a decision I gave up and never call or text since then.
I want him back, gosh I love him so freaking much and I’m having a rough time not being his girl anymore, but this is the first time that someone breaks up with me and I don’t know if those were excuses or not. You seem pretty honest and knowledgeable about these things, so I really need your opinion. Do you think he misses me and will ever call me again?

admin

April 11, 2014 at 3:48 am

So, he gave you the “im too busy for a gf” speech eh.

Do you honestly believe him?
Monique

April 13, 2014 at 11:50 pm

lol is it a common speech!? It’s the first time someone breaks up with me, so I did believe him at first. I followed your tips and didn’t text him or anything, but after a week he text me out of nowhere saying that he loves me & re-explaining his reasons including that he wanna start taking care of his body (working out) so that involves not expending time with me at all. So, he kinda left me.. twice! I told him that he left me for a dumbbell, and then he started saying that he got hurt time ago, he needs to do PT… he wanna get back into martial arts and compete… there is always something new, so yeah, I don’t really care much about his reasons anymore…. like you said we gotta be sure that we want our couple back & honestly I don’t wanna be with someone who obviously doesn’t love me. It hurts, I’m not gonna lie (cheer me up a bit please) but I’ll get over it 🙂
Btw, thanks A LOT for your site, you are doing a great job helping us!

Amy

April 9, 2014 at 1:58 pm

We were together for just about 6 months and He ended things with me 4 days ago. I will admit that things were great until about 2 weeks ago when I could feel we were distancing.

He rang and said weren’t working anymore because of the lack of communication/ I was taking him for granted. He said that he’d really cared about me and had never treated another girl the way he had with me but I needed a reality check because it seems I didn’t know what I wanted. He didn’t shout once during the call but I did get emotional and accused him of using me the whole time. He said please don’t make me out like that, I didn’t use you I really liked you but you just didn’t get that. You can say that to make yourself feel better but it’s not true. Then he mentioned that he was thinking of seeing other people and that he was saying this because he didn’t want to lie to me. I asked him if he ever wanted to talk again and he said that he’s explained his reasons clearly (so basically no) I ended the call.

2 days later I felt bad about the way id acted and realised that I’d been pushing him away so I sent him a text apologising and saying I want him and care about him and I hope that we can stay in contact. he didn’t acknowledge it and a day later on fb he posted a status saying that some people have an expiry date.

I felt so sad. I haven’t contacted him since, will he ever regret and contact me again if he cared so much once?

admin

April 10, 2014 at 2:10 am

What caused the distancing?

cara

April 8, 2014 at 6:32 pm

My boyfriend of seven years recently broke up with me because he needed some space to get his life together. Three days later I found out he had been persuing a 19 year old girl for the past month. He is 27 and i am 29. I flipped out at him when I found out, but have not spoke to him or heard from him since. Do you think he will reach out to me? If so, when?

admin

April 10, 2014 at 1:30 am

Sounds like a rebound to me.

Have you read my rebound page?

Sissi

April 8, 2014 at 10:45 am

Thanks for the tips! They were really helpfull.
I would appreciate your insight on what is going on with me and this boy I was seeing. We met last August, but only started a “kind of a relationship” a month ago. We are both very independent, and it was stated since the beggining that we would take things slow. However, he was quite overwhelming since the very start. He was very passionate and sweet, always asking me to hang out or come over. So I started to fall for him, and now I’m hooked. This lasted for 3 weeks. A week ago I noticed a bit of a change. He was a lot more quiet, his texts weren’t that sweet anymore… he started to distance himself. I’m not a clingy and needy person, I’m the opposite. So I let him be, and only made plans to meet him on the weekend. A couple of hours before we were supposed to meet, he called to cancel. I didn’t like that at all and I told him I needed to talk. I went to see him and asked him straight up what was going on. He said that this always happens to him, and that he can’t figure out why. He starts feeling weird about having someone in his life, and he distances himself. I told him that I was ok with everything but that he should have said something. He hugged and kissed me a lot, said that he didn’t want to hurt me, but I told him that this wasn’t fun anymore and that this meant goodbye.
Later that night, my best friend saw him coming out of a bar, completely wasted, and felt kind of worried about him walking home by himself. Her boyfriend offered him a ride home but he refused. The next day she called me to tell me what happened, and I was obviously worried too, so I called him to see if he was ok. He was ok, so we chated for a bit, he thanked me for my concern, and that was it. Yesterday morning he sent me a text, saying “good morning, just wanted to send you a kiss and wish you a great week”. I didn’t reply. The thing is… I’m really into this guy. I don’t know what to make of what’s happening. Can you help me, please? Thank you.

admin

April 8, 2014 at 6:20 pm

He was probably craving that attention from you…

Jill

April 7, 2014 at 12:01 pm

Hi you stated that you can tell if your ex misses you “If he has positive reactions when you see him in person.”
What exactly does this mean?
My bf broke up with me yesterday as he said he was questioning best for him to be single. After chatting and deciding to leave his, he grabbed me and gave me a huge tight bear hug kissed me and kept saying I’m sorry I’m really sorry
I am wondering what this hug meant? Anything….nothing….guilt trip for hurting me or that he cares a lot and gives me hope?

admin

April 7, 2014 at 5:18 pm

Does he smile a lot? Can you feel it from him when he talks to you. Does he look super happy to see you?

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5,888 thoughts on “How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup”