Popular posts
The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
Recent posts
Traits Avoidants Find Attractive
What Happens When A Narcissist Collapses?
How Do Avoidants Sabotage A Relationship?
Dismissive Avoidants And The No Contact Rule
The Power Of Silence After Rejection
Why Are Dismissive Avoidants Cruel?
The #1 Reason A Man Suddenly Commits
How Long Does Avoidant Deactivation Last?
How To Let Go Of An Avoidant Partner
How Do Avoidants Create Distance?
Post categories
Iregretnothing
June 30, 2016 at 9:32 pm
I actually don’t regret dumping my ex girlfriend at all. She was uncaring, lacked empathy, stubborn, crazy, emotionally abusive and had serious anger problems. After putting up with it for so long, I finally worked up the courage to kick her to the curb. She literally said “I couldn’t ever work in a hospital because I’d hate to be around sick pathetic people all day” and that’s not even the worst thing that’s come out of her mouth. I’m an easy going and caring guy, I constantly showered her with love, flowers, gifts, surprises and my attention to treat her right. I was raised to be a gentleman and treat women with respect. She never had a guy that treated her right and I came along and did, and you know what? She threw it right in my face, yelled, screamed, slammed doors in my face when she wouldn’t get her way. Heck she even managed to do these things on my birthday too! Heck, she even threw a fit when she went with me to visit my sick mother that’s in a facility because my mom ended up not feeling well enough for me to take her out to eat. She made a big stink about it because she was more concerned with herself going out to eat. She would take my keys away and it got the point that I would actually dread spending time with her because I knew ANYTHING could set this women off. No amount of kindness or compassion from me could ever make her be a better person. She takes advantage of people and put me through one of the hardest times in my life. So you know what? I’ll never regret “letting her go” because now I can live a more happy and positive life. I can now be the strong man that people need me to be and become a shoulder for others to lean on. Leaving her was the best decision I could ever make. Cheers!
Louise
June 29, 2016 at 2:53 pm
Hi I was dating a guy who is lovely really genuine kind and caring. The problem is I got very insecure and I took my past problems in to the relationship I thought he was going back to his ex whom he was with for 11 years (they been split 18 months) and so I ruined it and told him I want a baby which I certainly do not I already have 3 children and I couldn’t think of anything worse. In doing this I have scared him and I have explained that I do not want children and that I was frustrated and trying to get commitment because of my insecurities. Anyway after a few weeks of arguing we said we would give it a go and take things really slowly so he started ringing me from work everyday like he used to we went out for dinner 1 day I thought we were starting to build bridges. and then the next day he asked me to go to his house which I did with my daughter. Unfortunately my daughter and his daughter had an argument. We went home but he txt me a few times that night. The next day I heard nothing the day after I txt him and asked if he was ok and that he was been distant. He replied with I think we should leave it and that he had a bad couple of days and didn’t want to hurt me and he doesn’t know who he is or what he wants and that he cares about me and he will be always there for me if I need him.We exchanged some heated txts (we had only been back together a week). So started no contact after 2 days he txt and called accusing me of something which I didn’t do so I had to defend myself. Anyway it turned out it was his friend that did it. And he apologised by txt as I wouldn’t answer his calls that was 2 days ago I haven’t heard from him since. I will not get in touch with him im just wondering if 30 days no contact is too long. The majority of the time it was me contacting him before so I’m not sure if he will attempt to contact me. He is a very insecure person and has told me that he didn’t think he would meet anybody else when he split from his ex.
Louise
June 29, 2016 at 6:04 pm
Hi my no contact has broken he has now accused me of hacking his fb again I felt the need to defend myself but now feel disappointed that I have responded
Louise
June 29, 2016 at 3:12 pm
Can I also add that we spent as much time together as possible until I scared him off.
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 29, 2016 at 4:44 pm
Hi Louise,
I think just 21 days is ok
mitra
June 28, 2016 at 6:21 am
can i share my love life?its very complicated for me i just dont understand what to do
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 29, 2016 at 10:00 am
Hi Mitra,
of course.. we want to hear your story
Alexandra
June 23, 2016 at 8:24 am
How do I handle the texting after NC if I’m still living with my boyfriend? I send him messages during day ?
Vivi
June 19, 2016 at 8:28 am
Dear Team, I (36) just ended my realtionship of 4 months with my ex (37). Just before we started he got out of his 10 year realtionship: wife & son moved out of his place. She was cheating on him for several years. We met soon after, and had one of my best relationships with him. We were just so natural and great with eachother. He introduced me to his son and friends already, we have been on holidays and was planning the upcoming holiday for end of summer. Whenever he wasnt with his son, we stayed together. When I asked him if its going anywhere, he said he is not ready to commit. He said the moment he sees I take it serious, he would have left. I told him I dont want to move together yet, just would like to see if it has a future. He says he is not ready for a serious relationship – although I think it was already pretty serious…
Anyway, I left him last week writing a nice farewell message. He said he will miss me and he clearly wasnt happy with my decision. Still need to collect my stuff from him, so have to meet in the upcoming weeks. What do you think about my situation? Any chance to make it work?
Thanks for your reply. great website! hello from Hungary 🙂
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 21, 2016 at 3:43 pm
Hi Vivi,
I think it’s because he was married for so long, he’s afraid of the complications of being married again. How much time do you spend together?
Taylor
June 16, 2016 at 1:30 pm
Okay so my bf brokeup with me a weeka ago. I have been so upset i didnt say a word to him for a week but then i caved and aske dhim to go for a walk and he agreed. We talked casually at first but then i said i miss him. He said i know but i just cant be in a relationship rn. He told me there is no one else and he told me he loved me two months ago and that i was the first and the last girl he ever wanted to love. I love him very much. While we were talking i spoke about how i loved watching him work he is very passionate about cars and mechanics and loves working on new projects. I did go with him a few times while he worked on stuff. Anyways as we talked i told him about everything we could do to make this work i told him i love watching him work and im more then happy to sit in a garage with him and just soend time with him. But he thinks that a girl should not be treated this way. He also doesnt want to have to text someone all the time when he is in the middle of these projects. I told him i dont need that and that all i have ever wanted is someone to love me and take care of me and just be there. I dont need gifts or expensive dates just someone to spend time with and love. Yet he still said i like what you are syaing but i just dont want a relationship right now. Then i told him i may not be here anymore when he is ready and he got all paniced and said “ur only a text away tho” i said “ya but i may not be when your ready” then he said he wants to keep tlaking and hanging out occasionally. I strongly think he still loves me but hes confused about what he wants. I love him so much and i havent talked to him since this was on monday. I atartedno contact yesterday but it is hard and i love him so much. Do you think we have a chance of getting back together because nothing would make me happier? Im doing my best to keep busy but i get sad still 🙁 i just want him to come back and i know i cant rush him. Help me out please
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 17, 2016 at 9:47 pm
Hi Taylor,
you have to find what makes you happy apart from him.. because if you make your world revolve around him and then you become a responsibility for him, not a partner.. it should be equal.. A relationship is not a healthy one if you just want to feel the feeling of being loved..because anybody can give that feeling, it can be faked too.. but not everybody has the same values as you do.. A relationship is a choice. Once it becomes a necessity to feel loved that’s not true love anymore
Alka
June 13, 2016 at 5:30 pm
Hi
I had a break up 1week ago after a 6 years of relationship. Things became like daily routine to him and our relationship did not seem special to him anymore. We had a very good time and shared loads of good memories. We were quiet serious and very true to each other. We started to have arguments everyday for his change in behaviour even though he still loved me. Things started to get more complicated slowly and now we had to take this decision to end it. We still talk normally and share things but we are just like good friends. I still love him a lot and I remember all the times we had and I’m finding it very difficult to let go of the memories. At the same time I’m quite angry that he managed to stay fine stopped thinking of all those best memories we shared together.it does not even effect him where it is so difficult for me to live every minute. I know that he still loves me but it isn’t the same way like he did before. I really wish things fall into place and we get back. At present we speak normally. I do not understand what to do. Is there anything I can do to re-generate the lost feelings in him? Because I know he was very true and sincere to me…. I feel he just needed some change in his life. Will no contact rule help? Please help
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 17, 2016 at 12:48 pm
Hi Alka,
did you follow chris’ advice above?
Julia
June 12, 2016 at 11:16 pm
so i’ve been fight with my bf. he didnt reply my texts. but he liking peoples pic on instagram. so i text him again i said “okay u liking girls pic on instagram but u didnt reply me. who the hell you think u are” not a minute than he reply me and said that he didnt know theres a messages. what a bullshit is he holding his phone and i texting him about 6 times. how could he didnt know theres a messages. and he didnt say sorry. so i just read his messages an we’re not talking in about 3 days. and until now he never text me to say sorry or something. so what should i do?
thanks
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 17, 2016 at 11:23 am
Hi Julia,
have you started nc?
Sabah
June 8, 2016 at 3:31 pm
So me and my boyfriend broke up a month ago. We where still talking but he thinks I’m too clingy and doesn’t know if he will either regret his decision or change his mind in the future. He is not giving me much. So I only call him once a day now and we where together for 4 years. Broke up because he had a break down and didn’t ever give me a reason why. He is not seeing anyone else either. Please help me what can I do to get him back. Since it has been a month. I am trying to work on myself and be independent but not sure how to make him realise he made a mistake or wither he should come back to me. We had a great relationship and never gave up on each other but I have no idea why he broke down. HELP
Lebo
June 7, 2016 at 10:52 am
So there’s this guy who I’ve known for a while.. Last year around November we tried to date but 2 weeks later he told me that he was ‘vibing’ with someone else and didn’t want to play me so he ended it.. He came back in January telling me that he missed me and when I confronted him about the November thing he said he only chose the other girl cos he had spent more time with her..
We tried again but about a month later we got into a huge argument.. We never hung out and he never called only texted.. That bothered me and when I confronted him, he got angry and accused me of trying to change him because he’s not comfortable with calls.. Then after that he kept trying to keep in touch until one day he told me he wants me back.. So I gave him another chance.. He relocated to a nearby town so I couldn’t see him for that month we were ‘dating’..
He was always busy juggling school and work and for the longest time I was ok with it.. Last week I was out with my friends and he arrived in town.. He asked to see me but I told him that I had already made plans with my friends.. So he didn’t talk to me all week and yesterday when I confronted him about it he told me that he wants a serious relationship with someone who will drop everything just to see him and he said I’m not the person because I always choose my friends over him.. Note that we had only been on one date! So I was confused by all this.. I still like him and I believe we can have something special but the problem is that it never starts cos he keeps leaving.. Do you think I can get him back and try again?
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 12, 2016 at 4:42 am
Hi Lebo,
that’s hard coz I think he likes you too of course but both of you neglected each other a little bit by showing affection. He doesn’t call at first and then you said you will not put him first compared to your friends.. You need to put more effort in building more rapport with him because I think he will not make the effort if he knows your friends are more important.
Talia
June 4, 2016 at 12:06 am
The situation I am in is a little bit different. I was in a relationship for a year and a half. We have had trust issues because of him crossing the line and doing disrespectful things with girls behind my back. We overcame all this. A couple months ago he went on a boys trip for 1 week, we got into an argument right before this, he left on the trip and didn’t speak to me for 1 week the whole time he was away with his friends which hurt me. When we returned we worked things out. Recently I found out he met many girls on vacation and did things which are not okay when you are in a serious relationship. I found out and was very upset and expressed this to him. He broke up with me saying I am jealous and overreacted and he doesn’t want to continue the relationship anymore. I feel so guilty and bad for overreacting, I didn’t mean to and I have learned from it. The first week I was constantly contacting him and saying sorry, he blocked me off everything, all social media and my phone numbers. He finally sent me an email to say it is done and that nothing will change his mind. I have since done NC and have been keeping busy and trying to better myself, it has been 1 week. Still nothing from him…I feel so hurt and it is extremely painful. I have so many regrets that I lost a good man because I overreacted and acted stupid. I didn’t mean to and wouldn’t let it happen again. How do I make him come back/regret leaving me? I am a good woman who is educated and continuing to further my degree and have a lot going for me in life as he always would say to me…how do I get him to realize the good things and come back? I feel stupid to ever message him again because he has completely cut me off… what advice would you give to someone in this position? I would really appreciate your input.
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 13, 2016 at 9:07 am
Hi Talia,
hin disrespecting other girls and the vacation incident, are these two separate incidents? how did you over react? because if I werr you, I would also be angry with everything that happened. are you sure you’re not lowering yous standards for him not to leave you?
Neveah
June 1, 2016 at 1:09 am
Me and my ex were together 5 years we had a son durning that time and now he’s 3, he’s left the home about a year ago. In the very beginning he was mean and hurtful.. I let him see our son all the time and still was very mean.. I got pregnant by him durning this time and now 7 months pregnant with our lil girl.. Durning all this time he’s ignored me and I let him b with yes here and there I would tell him stuff but continued to move forward. Now he’s coming around started off with hi’s and goodbyes as we did our pick ups and drop offs with our son. Then goodnights then conversation regarding our son.. I still kept my distance and now he’s inviting me out with him and our son.. He’s taken us out to dinner twice and talks About taking our son to the beach together.. He says he doubts our babygirl cause we weren’t together but he knows me and knows from our passed that if I doubted myself I would just stay away from him it’s his for sure with no doubt. So we ended up sleeping together one time and that’s where I’m at now..
Don’t know what direction to take now cause I know sleeping with him wasn’t a good thing and don’t want to end up in the friend zone. Help me please
EBR Team Member: Amor
June 1, 2016 at 1:17 am
Hi Neveah,
if his only toxic for your pregnancy then hold off wanting to get back him for now. It looks he’s still a good father, so he will always be present in your life. FOr now focus on the health of your baby girl and try to find other sources of happiness apart from him cause if he’s your concern during this pregnancy, you might harm your baby by always being stressed and sad. Have you noticed that when you started to let him be, he started to be nicer? It’s like a sneak peak of the effects of doing nc but for now, I don’t suggest you focus on that. But you should do it, so that you can start to focus more on yourself but not to get him back at this time.
Didou
May 31, 2016 at 12:00 pm
Hi
My fiancé broke up with me in September. Now he talk to me and express his love and respect. But he didn’t ask me for a relationship. We talk about romantic moments and feeling we shared together… So I’m confused and I don’t know what to do. When he broke up with me he told me that he is so depressed and he refused the idea of the engagement and he won’t be in the life of no one. And he said that I am the first and the last woman in his life..
I love him so much.
Maya
May 31, 2016 at 7:17 am
Hello, I would like to thank you for all the information up there to help us how to let our ex regret leaving us. My name is Maya, im 20 years old and i would like to share with you my story.
One year ago, i started a new work when we first saw each other and directly have been attracted to each others. We started chatting and getting to know each others as any new couples do. Then we decided to offically date, we stayed tegether around a year and few months then he decided to break up with me. Our relation was the most beautiful relation any 2 could have, our parents were best friends; hanging out tegether, going to parties etc.. My parents loved him a lot and so did his parents also! All his family really loved a lot! They always ask him about me, they were my second family! My ex and I are both the same age but at first we were soo much different from each others, but we both tried to change in order to fix everything out! And it went pretty well! But think about it? Name for me one couples that dont suffer from problems? He hated the fact that we had sometimes misunderstanding! That was the first reason that let him want to break up with me! I was on his future plan schedule, where he’ll travel and finsihes his masters and then get me there and get married but suddenly he told me ;” i wont let you wait for me and then at the end i would be able to get you there.” Anyway he really hurted me that after this wonderful relation happened for a whole year, he discovered that we’re not meant to be together anymore. We suffered a lot, he loves me but cant be with me anymore, we started talking again and letting out some of our feelings; like he may say i love you, i need you! Or even when we see each other he get closer to kiss me, hug me!! He used to cry when he sees me! I put the blame on him on everything, he didnt fight for our love, he just let me go although he still love me!! Then oneday i thought by myself, that till when we’ll stay like that? Im giving him more care and love and im not receiving it back? Here where i decided to not talk with him anymore and move on.
Sorry i talked very much but i want to know that this way would make him feel regretting leaving me? Or would this make him feel; where is she? I want her back! Im in need to her?
Thank you ❤️
Maya
May 31, 2016 at 8:34 pm
It has been around one month that we break up then after few days we started talking and we acted as if we’re together, both of us didnt control saying love words or showing care! Then when i started realizing that he is controlling his love and care and not showing me it i decided to not talk to him, so yeah we’re now in nc period.
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 31, 2016 at 7:59 pm
Hi Maya,
You’re welcome! When did you break up? So, you mean right now you’re in nc?
Paula
May 29, 2016 at 3:07 pm
My boyfriend broke up with me about 3 weeks ago and he didn’t want to give me the exact reason, everytime I asked him he was like yes it is this then it is that.. So I decided to talk to a friend of his, and he told me that he is “cutting off the bridge” in order for me to move on, that he has moved on and he doesn’t want to get back with me ever in his life.
He is now thinking about his future, what to do, study, etc. We were used to see each other everyday but I moved abroad(150km) to start my career. Since then he has been harder but I went to see him almost every weekend
First he told me that he doesn’t see his future with me on it and that it is not because of me but because of him and his feelings, then the next day he said that he didn’t want to make more efforts for our relationship that he needed to think about his future and that he wanted to be free of responsibilities. His friend told me that it is because of the routine and that he thinks that the “flame” is gone, that he doesn’t want to get back with me and that even if I try and try it is not going to work, that I should move on; he told me that of course my ex loves me as his first love and because we have been together for more than 2 years but not like something more.
For me all this was shocking because I was very focused on uni and I thought everything was okay but he didn’t even tell me: “oh you know I think we should change some things…” he just decided it on his own and broke up with me. Right now we are not talking, I wanted him to explain me the reasons why he broke up with me (because it was basically his friend who told me) and he replies my messages but now he is rude… one week after he broke up with me he told me if we could still see each other as friends(when we broke up I told him I didnt want to be his friend because it was very painful) and I told him okay I dont know and then he said that he misses me so I was confused, the next day he was being super rude to me and he acted like: “I dont remember telling you that I wanted to see you”.
I was really desperate because he didnt leave me talk to him after the breakup and I wrote him an email saying that I was sorry that we could maybe start over again etc and he was like I am sorry, it hurts me to tell you this but it is not going to work, because I dont want to, I dont have the same feelings. and after that I begged and then I said okay just good luck with your life.
His friend told him that I talked to him and tried to convince him to give me an opportunity and he just said: “let her talk, I have to cut off the bridge in order to make her move on”
I just want him back so badly and I dont know what to do
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 31, 2016 at 7:42 am
Hi Paula,
enough chasing and start the no contact process now to heal.. YOu need to heal first and be more emotionally stable before you try to rebuild rapport with him again. Do 30 days
Didou
May 25, 2016 at 9:47 pm
Hi
My fiancé broke up with me in September after I got angry because he didn’t call me after 3 years of waiting (he is working in an other country) the problem start when I asked him to make an official engagement and make me happy. So he accepted and make it official but I was so sad..then he just go back to work after he refused to contact me and just left me. His mother called me to tell me that everything is over between us… So I got mad. Depressed and I tried to contact him to understand. He just said that I hurt him.and he won’t get engaged any more and he will never love any woman in his life.i m the first and the last..I did the no contact twice..now he talk to me as a freind so I thought that if I try to make him feel love he will back to me. These days I make him feel comfortable and wants to hold me and seeing me.we make text sex… Now I’m lost and I don’t know what to do to get him back.( we were together for nine years)
Didou
May 29, 2016 at 10:26 pm
Hi!
No he travelled for work in September 2012. We were in touch every single day. We talk all time.but when he come back home he just was busy all the time and didn’t discuss with me about the engagement. So I got angry and I was so depressed that I told him that I’m not happy
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 31, 2016 at 11:59 am
9 years is long, I get that after that time, engagement really comes to mind in a woman. The thing with men is that, if you pressure them about that, the more they wouldn’t want to do it.. It’s like they see it as nagging, and if you nag like even before you’re married, they think it would get worse once you’re already married..
If I were you, I’d stop demanding and focus more meeting new people and expanding my world so that I can meet a man more suitable in my timeline.. and also for him to realize that you’re not waiting forever
i
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 28, 2016 at 3:56 am
Hi Didou,
you didn’t talk for 3 years? how long have you been talking again now?
Kimberly
May 19, 2016 at 1:19 am
I really do appreciate your reply but i have questions as am confuse. How do i value myself or rather if you were to be in my shoes base on this context, how would you value yourself? What are your dos and don’ts? Where would you start visiting? What kind of friends would you start making cos unlike me i dont have a single friend.. Just have people i know and talk with. I really need to work on myself and be a better me. Thanks
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 24, 2016 at 7:51 pm
Hi Kimberly,
sorry for the late reply.. Start with what you love doing. If you love reading, go to book conferences, or explore by joining a writing short course. Join one day seminars and make friends there. Have a make over, work out, re-connect with old friends and invite them to hang out or help out with them. Volunteer for a cause or for an event of a relative. List down what makes you happy, if you don’t know that, list down what doesn’t. List your goals and start working on them. Include why, so that it has more power to come true.
Amy
May 17, 2016 at 3:32 am
I didn’t find this website in time and I text him to the point that he blocked me, so the no contact rule might have no effect….since he’s the one who technically initiated it :/ is there any hope and what’s my next step?
Jennifer Seiter
May 21, 2016 at 2:11 am
Hey Amy, I’m sorry to hear that. If you are blocked read this post. https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/what-to-do-if-your-ex-boyfriend-blocks-you/
Also, how long did you date? What was the cause of the break up? Have you taken your chances quiz yet?
Maria
May 15, 2016 at 7:37 pm
My ex boyfriend and I have been together well friends for 6 years and dated for three. We broke up last year for a full year then he came back and we tried again but he was going through things & now he’s going through things again and this time again he’s flirting with other girls but tells me he’s afraid I’ll forget about him by the time he’s okay and treats me the way I deserve. I love him I believe I’m meant to be with him is it possible to regret leaving me a second time but still wanting me in the end? And does this article work for me as well?
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 19, 2016 at 7:57 am
HI Maria,
I’m sorry I don’t understand. He doesn’t want you to move on but he’s still flirting with other girls?
Kimberly
May 14, 2016 at 2:06 pm
So i dated a guy for 2years and he broke up with me simply because i confronted him with a confession by one of the girls he cheated on me with. A week after our break up he got into another relationship but he keeps telling me he still wants me and dont know how to get out of the relationship with the other girl.. I really love him, i saw my future with him, we have made lots of plans together, i have no other boyfriend and to start a new relationship seem tiring. This issue started in march and we have been in communication since then, we even see sometimes because we currently live in the same city. I want my boyfriend back.. I miss him but how do i get him back.. I might be wrong but i Feel the no contact rule wont really be effective because he has a new girl that he is probably excited about. I want to know what to do next, how to get him back or how to totally forgot about him. Please reply. Thank you!
EBR Team Member: Amor
May 15, 2016 at 7:34 am
Hi Kimberly,
you can’t keep holding onto him like that.. if you really want a guy to value you, you have to value yourself first