5 Powerful Methods To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Regret Losing You

1,759 thoughts on “How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Regret Letting You Go”

Elizabeth

November 28, 2015 at 10:21 pm

I dated a guy for 2,5 years. Suddenly (really suddenly) he broke up with me. We really understood eachother and talked constantly even before we became a couple, for many years he really was my best friend, so I kind of did the oppositie of what you advise to do for about 2 weeks. (I kept trying to prove that I still loved him and we should just try again or at least try to be friends…) This pushed further and further away to the point he didn’t want to talk to me at all and looked at me as if he hated me and I just really don’t recongnize him anymore and he said that the old him is never going to come back but I think that he just said that because he was angry. Now what makes things even more complicated is that he is in my class…so we see eathother all the time. But do you think I still have a chance to make him want me back and should I make the no contact period longer or even wait untill he says something to me (since we are in the same class and I was putting my effort far to much in getting him back in the beginning)

Elizabeth

December 2, 2015 at 12:27 pm

I feel like I should wait until he contacts me because that is easy for him to do, since we are in the same class and he lives quiet close to me.
Chris Seiter

December 3, 2015 at 4:59 am

Do whatever you think is best. 🙂 You know him and your situation better than I ever could.
Elizabeth

December 1, 2015 at 4:43 pm

And I have not talked to him for a couplet of days now (he als didn’t talk to me) and today I had explain something in class and I explaind it to him hé just kept rolling his eyes and sighing and doing thing like that. Does that mean he is really angry at the moment and he will calm down and realize hé made a mistake after a while and of so what should I do?
Chris Seiter

December 2, 2015 at 12:11 am

You need to do no contact longer then a couple of days. What was your plan?

Mellisa P

November 24, 2015 at 1:49 pm

Hi Chris. Me and my boyfriend of almost 3 years just broke up a few days ago. I found out he cheated on me for a few weeks before we broke up. He was the one who broke up with me saying that he didn’t wan to hurt me anymore.I was and still a mess. I even beg him to not leave me. I heard he is together with that girl he cheated on me with now. What should I do? I tried moving on but I just can’t. I didn’t call or text him or anything after the break up. I want to text him so badly everyday but I stop myself every time. So should I continue not contacting him for 30days? Will he regret leaving me? Please help and thanks 🙁
Mira

November 22, 2015 at 10:56 pm

hi chris .. i ,,, even i dont know he is my x or not. i’ve met him on virtual 2 years more ago. we like each other. 4 months we are in virtual relation ship, tried to be serious. even we’ve made planing the name for our baby girl. he is teacher , he is portuguese. im indonesian, so im with him just talk from skype almost everyday for many hours. did many things together like real couple. but finally he told me truth, about he have son from his x gf . he told me he dont want tell truth cause he afraid he will lost me. im so hurt, but i already love him. so i tried to accept him back. but some weeks after he never contact me anymore. before he always did many things to talk and call me on skype. but he just stop it urgently. i asked to him until im cried a lot all the week, he got mad cause he felt im so obsession for him. he just told me he cant be with me, we are too different. too far. he want me get better guy for future. and he told me he still love his x gf. its so hurt me. then im stop to talk to him. im block all my contact from him for 5 months. but i stil love him, i cant forget him.. then finally i decide to go to europe to visit him. i leaved my job , im tried to made a chance to meet him. i did many things to made me come to his country. im not rich girl. i dont have money, i just work as volunteer and painter, but i tried so hard to get him in real. and i did it! i met him finally in real, i contact him again when im in europe , he so surprise and he said sorry many times cause ever hurted me, and didint expect will see me in real. so when we met, he take vacation for 2 weeks to spend the time with me. everyday everynight we have beautifull moment like honeymoon. he care a lot about me so much more than my dad! i love him more. before my planing come to met him just wanna know and make a good moment with him,, but. opposite made me want him more again. our vacation full of sweet things, passion, sensual, everything! when we said good bye each other in the airport, we both cried and its really horrible. after that , we just keep going contact by skype. sometime chat or talking with cam. sex cam.. many times. but again 2 months after he told me i should go back with my life, he cant be with me… and he said he will focus , start to back to his x gf and his son. he told me he still love her. so its really hurt me .. again. and,, i just think,, i cant lost him. he is the one who can made me feel better, spirit me, motivated me, adviced me. look like my dad! i really feel home when with him. so.. finally i took the risk again. almost 1 year everynight everytime im work in my laptop, looking for a chance to back to portugal. tried to looking for the job. then finally after that i came back to portugal in the same month before my first time came to there 1 year ago. august. im work as maid. he so surprised and cant believe im finally decide to leaved my country and want to settle in portugal. i got many problem to made me stay here, document, money, etc. not easy for me. i should hard work. but cause i want to be near with him , i tried to fight. but, u know that… didnt work… he didint give any respect about what i did. no progress!! even he just said to me. he want me to respect him, and let him focus with his life and his x. he not single anymore. when i got many problem here, he cant helped me much. im so sad, so hurt, feel alone, really really bad. im feel lost.. i dont know what i should to do. im here for him, but he ignored me. but i cant back to my country, its horrible, cause i have leaved all my life just for him. but u know what. every i stop to text him or contact him. he always tried to text me again, even he asked me why i stoped to flirting with him. i dont understand about his mind. he always excited when flirting with me. and like to do sex cam , sex chat with me. we did many times… but he just contact me twice a week on skype to flirting. even the last when i said good bye to him on message. 2 weeks after he tried to met me and had sex with me. he told me, before he want to back to his life, but so difficult to ignore me. but still he just said to me, it just sex, not more.. its.. crazy,,, and after , now he didnt contact me,but i bet he will contact me again after 1 week and ask again something horny to me. btw now he blocked my facebook. the reason just cause he afraid his x will know me. because before his x try to contact me from facebook. she spy me. i guess im evil… but im feel like rubbish he had sex with me but he dont want more. about his x he just said now he trying to make planing to comeback to his x, but he didint say clear how far his relationship with her. what i should to do? now actually imtrying to make a date with a lot of guy to make me not really think about him. but im feel bad cause i have unconfident to interact with a guy. hope u can give me the advice. i really need ur help. im feeling lost here .. thanks 🙂
Taylor

November 19, 2015 at 9:02 pm

I feel like this is absolutely impossible when you’re nine months pregnant and live together. Although he works out of town all week. Can’t really ignore him for a month though. ?

Chris Seiter

November 30, 2015 at 9:57 pm

Yes you are definitely going to have to alter the entire strategy.

Alli (Can't Lose Hope)

November 16, 2015 at 9:43 pm

Chris, I have some more questions for you about my own particular situation that I emailed and left you a voice message about on 11/15/15 (Can’t Lose Hope).

I have some more info for you about our relationship, too, first being that I have a lot of communication problems because I used to take a drug daily for ADHD (prescribed), but although it was prescribed he really expressed that he felt it inhibited my mental capacity and made me blow up. I expressed to him that I was going to stop taking all drugs, even alcohol etc. because I really don’t want to feel like I’m constantly angry due to something I can’t control. Now I CAN control it because I’m sober, and I really want him to give the sober me another chance, even though he’s really adamant about it “being his final decision”.

Firstly, I’m not confident that getting him to regret the breakup will even work, even after I’ve improved myself because he said, “I’ve made my decision, I can’t go back again.” He even said “no promises” about simply talking in person sometime down the road after time has passed (all said during the breakup convo, I have NOT contacted him since the breakup conversation. Going to stay firm on that!) *

Second, the language he used during the breakup confused me, and the way he did it confused me too. He did it over the phone, because he said it “wasn’t a good idea to do this in person” twice. Obviously that is because it would be too painful for him to see me while he broke up with me, is that a good, or a bad thing? What if he uses this pain to get OVER me during the no contact period, uses it to fuel his fire of moving on from me?

A branch off that question, what if even when I break this no contact period he is still mentally in denial about wanting me back, even though it seems impossible that he could forget 6 ½ years in the span of 30 days. I just don’t want him to use the pain he’s experiencing now as a tool to move on from me.

Third, what if he responds neutrally to my texts after the no contact period, but sees right through them and sees what I’m trying to do by conjuring up old feelings of better times?

Finally, if I do get that face-to-face meeting eventually, how in the world do I convince him that now that I’m completely sober, I really want the chance to be the person I know I can be for him, and make up for my behavior in the last 6 months?
Ash

November 16, 2015 at 5:34 pm

Hi Chris,
I really need your help. My boyfriend of two years broke up with me last week because he found out a told him a little white lie (seriously, he over reacted), but nonetheless he was hurt so I can’t discount that. Anyway, a little background is that he has been feeling insecure for a while, always trying to catch me doing something wrong but I literally never do. We rarely fought, I’m close with his family, we have been on vacations together and talk all day long. Always make eachother laugh and just are perfect together. This is not a dysfunctional relationship at all. I love him and have always been loyal and committed to him but he felt inclined to prove otherwise. He broke up with me TOTALLY out of anger, saying he “needs time” and “we can’t get back together right now”. I tried to employ the NC rule but I was left feeling like he was taking advantage of me, knowing that I was sitting around and waiting for him and who knows if he would ever come back. I also felt that since it was so out of anger it wasn’t a legit choice that I could respect. So I texted him and asked him to take a week and decided if it was still what he wanted after cooling down we could meet up and talk about it. He told me a week was not enough time, and that he wants three weeks and then we could talk. I agreed but still felt like he was playing games. I texted him the other day and asked him to assure me that he was using the time apart to really think about what he wants, not to get over me and then keep me hanging around only to boost his own confidence in his decision. He texted back and said that he promises he was using the time to think. Then after a few texts back and forth (of course, give a mouse a cookie and I can’t stop), I reminded him that time away could be healthy and that I hope he didn’t throw us away forever. I asked him to confirm that were on the same page and he said we were and that he loves me too. I still can’t help but feel like he’s playing games. Im worried that if I wait all this time for him to decide he is just going to be like “ya my decision is final”. I am constantly sad and haven’t eaten at all, I’ve lost several pounds and am already very thin to begin with. I don’t sleep because of the nightmares and racing thoughts about how the situation will turn out. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, and think that if he really wanted it to be over he wouldnt need to wait three weeks to confirm that, and also that he loves me an will miss me but I just cant be sure. How do I play this to make sure his choice is to get back together? I’m worried it will be out of sight out of mind…
E

November 16, 2015 at 8:06 am

Me and my ex broke up a few times over the last months. But he has come back saying he can’t be without me and loves me. But this time he’s ended the relationship due to him saying I don’t trust him anymore to he don’t love me anymore and hasn’t for a while, his feelings towards me was because of the baby. But what I don’t understand how could he say he loves me every night and cuddle me act as if everything is fine then say what he said. He doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore but I’m pregnant with his second child.

G

November 19, 2015 at 8:07 am

Because I kept mentioning the girl he was speaking to when we broke up last time
Chris Seiter

November 19, 2015 at 5:20 am

What happened to make you not trust him?

courtney

November 15, 2015 at 5:19 am

chris, me and my boyfriend of 14 months recently broke up because he found out i was texting my female best friend of 7 years he had asked me to quit talking to her because they saw each other at a gas station and he tried being friendly and my friend gave him a nast look and drove off because he talks badly about her and she knows this so when he found out i was acting her he kicked me out and said he was done with me our friend picked us up from his house and dropped him and his friend off at the gym a little later i get a call from him accusing me of doing coke behind his back which is not true i had gotten it for my friends neighbor because they wouldn’t front him and his friend was there the next day when the girl i had gotten the stuff from came by looking for me since she was under the impression the stuff was for me anyways he doesn’t believe me and he even called my whole family claiming I’m a coke addict and need to go to rehab and all this craziness i even took a drug test for him to prove i didn’t do any coke he told me i popped for both and told me to get out of his house but afterwards told everyone else i only popped for theca anyways its been about a week now he asked me to go to church with him as a friend cause we just recently started going to church when we were still together i went to church with him he didn’t say anything to me left without saying anything after church i texted him saying thank you for acsking me to come with him no respond and then the other night i saw he was posting stuff saying i didn’t care and i messaged him saying “i do care i always just like i will always love you and that nothing can change my heart sorry i just to tell you that ill let you be” he read it but no response tonight i picked some close up from a mutual friend of ours and he was there i didn’t say hey or even make contact even acted super happy and i don’t know what to do i want him back but at the same time i don’t because since the beginning he’s been ver controlling asking me to change all sorts of things which i did i changed a LOT for him but he was never down to do the same and i never wanted to change him just wanted him to listen to how i feel more instead of just telling me doesn’t have time or didn’t care he was also slightly abusive there were 2 locations a couple months back where he laid hands on me then recently when we were still dating we were drinking together i tried talking about my feelings to him it turned into a fight he started trashing my things like he has done before and he grabbed me by that and acted like he was gonna hit me but didn’t now back to the present situation I’m making drastic changes in myself and lifestyle and I’m half way hoping it’ll bring him or at least make him wished he stayed but i just don’t know what to do i want him back but only if he can change the way he treats me i love him more than life itself i stayed with him through catching him lying multiple times doing pills behind my back being with another woman when we were trying to fix things and even abusing me verbally and physically is it even worth trying to get him back?
Alyson

November 13, 2015 at 5:40 am

me and my ex were together for ten months . we were close and were happy with each other and as time went by he was a little distant . we go to the same school an one day he told me he don’t want the relationship anymore because he wasn’t feeling it and he wanted to be alone or free. Then , he started bothering my friends and touching them inappropriately while im there . Ive never tried the NC rule , and before I heard about I would talk to him a little bit but I showed him I still want the relationship too . Can the Nc Rule make him regret losing me ?

Chris Seiter

November 17, 2015 at 2:10 am

Yes it can!

Brittany

November 12, 2015 at 10:37 am

So this is going to sound ridiculous, I do not want my ex boyfriend back, however… For the years we were together that he toke for granted I want him to regret his decision. I know I am to blame as well, not throwing all of it on him. We have a child, always talked about marriage and had a very heated/passionate relationship that came to an end that did not include a lead up to the actual end. That being said I just want him to know he made a mistake and regret it. I sound veangeful, oh my. With that over the years I have let myself go to an extent and am willing to put forth as much effort possible… Heck I am single again, the other girls are only getting younger in comparison. Need to do it anyways to stand a chance 🙂 I have read a fair amount of your writings and am wondering, should I strive to be a form of a ug? Or are there different rules at play I need to abide by. Like I said we have a kid, our relationship began and ended with passion (good and bad), and well he broke up with me but I don’t want someone who I have to fight to get back-i believe in myself enough to know that I should not have to question My self-worth in regards to the person i am ment to spend my life with. That’s one of the only people out there that you should never have to do that with. In my opinion at least.

Chris, if you have the time, pointers or helpful words of advice?
ERICA

November 10, 2015 at 11:48 pm

Hello, i am 24yo and was with my ex for 8years. My question is how do u implement the no contact rule and available/not available. When we have q sont together and have to stay in contact. Please help me.
Mama

November 9, 2015 at 12:50 pm

He cheated on me with a girl that stays in my neighborhood, i forgave him and we continued, i later found out he was still seeing the girl. when i confronted him we had a major fight, he eventually broke up with me in September. I began the No Contact rule immediately.He sent me messages, called me a few times but i dint respond. I reconnected with him a day ago by sending a message to him on Facebook. But his response was not what i expected. He denied breaking up with me saying he just told me he needed space but i misinterpreted him. Infact the reconnection did not go as i planned. I did not mention anything about our past relationship but he kept bringing it up. Almost as if he wanted us to fight again. I tried to tell him 2 stop talking about our relationship and the whole drama that happened but he refused, i dunno what to do. Should i tell him i want to see him so we can talk face to face. or i should stop contact with him again?
beth

November 6, 2015 at 7:04 pm

Me and my ex broke up in june its been 4 months since and he still sends me the odd snapchat, i’ve recently moved to uni and found he texts me at least every other week asking how everything is. I fell for this and replied and we would have long chats for the night. Since reading your blog i have decided to enter the no contact stage but is it too late ? am i already friend zoned?
yuvi

November 5, 2015 at 1:51 pm

hi chris. me n my so called ex bf has been in a rela for just 10 days.
he is a taurus and am a gemini
at ffirst he was like crazy after me. calls on calls text on texts, he would crave to meet me even for a second
the last time we met we had a great day together. but the same night he started ignoring me giving me reasons that his mood was of. n on asking why he said he didnt know.
the nxt day there was no morning texts frm him as he used to do. so i sent him one.
he reply saying he loves me.
the very afternoon again his mood was off. then the reason he gave was that he is lose in our relation.
i ask im whether he wants to break n am waiting for an answer. he said he will let me know but after 1 day there was no text from him.
he is always online on viber which he was not ealier.
there has been no contact between us fo 1 day now n i really dnt know what to do
i have started loving him n all of the sudden break up.
i have a feeling that he got someone else.

please chris tell me what should i do and how to deal with this situation
yuvi

November 5, 2015 at 1:50 pm

hi chris. me n my so called ex bf has been in a rela for just 10 days.
he is a taurus and am a gemini
at ffirst he was like crazy after me. calls on calls text on texts, he would crave to meet me even for a second
the last time we met we had a great day together. but the same night he started ignoring me giving me reasons that his mood was of. n on asking why he said he didnt know.
the nxt day there was no morning texts frm him as he used to do. so i sent him one.
he reply saying he loves me.
the very afternoon again his mood was off. then the reason he gave was that he is lose in our relation.
i ask im whether he wants to break n am waiting for an answer. he said he will let me know but after 1 day there was no text from him.
he is always online on viber which he was not ealier.
there has been no contact between us fo 1 day now n i really dnt know what to do
i have started loving him n all of the sudden break up.
i have a feeling that he got someone else.

please chris tell me what should i do 🙁
Apple

November 2, 2015 at 1:00 pm

I met a guy and immediately had a relationship with him after the first week of meeting. We enjoyed each other’s company for over 4 months of being together. Then I found out that I was pregnant. By the time that I informed him about my situation, he turned his back on me. He went back to his girlfriend of 3 years. Until now, they’re together. He doesn’t even want to see his daughter. How can I have him change his mind? I stopped contacting him since I gave birth. My daughter is already a year and a half old now but she still wasn’t able to see his dad. I want our family to become whole but I don’t want to show to him that I’m still affected of him.
akshita

October 28, 2015 at 10:39 pm

hey!!
i am a 17 yr old and was in a relation with a guy since past 4 yrs . we met in school and somehow just got together even though our academic standards were completely contrary ( he being not so bright in academics) . initially due to age everything was just like friendship but gradually the relation got intense and we both developed understanding. the love got deeper everyday. we both were obsessed of each other. it might sound strange at this age but we both were really intended to marry each other . many a times my parents were offensive of the relation but i fought all to be with him and hid the relationship time and again. But it was in this may only, my homies got to know of us again and this time it was devastating as its my 12th going on. for a month i held on him and then broke up for the reason i lost all the courage for once. he started drinking and smoking from which i had protected him since past 4 years as his friends have always been the ciggerate lovers. even after break up i was in contact with him guiding him as i have always did, but he said that he don’t want to be in contact n we both bid the final farewell which was actually not the final one. after 20 days i had a msg from him stating that he wants to be friends. i agreed as i wanted the same . we talked and he started calling me best friend, then after some 15 days when i was chatting with him , he said he was busy . i logged in his account as i had the password , and to my surprise he was constantly flirting with some girl, but ignoring me. on a sarcastic note i updated my dp, which disturbed his mental calm . we had a fight about all these issues and then he blocked me. i tried to contact him in so many ways but replies were always rude and negative. i stopped and cut back on conversation too. but then again after 15 days i had a msg from him . i called him, and after a long apologising speech he said he want me back in the same old way the same old love and same king of girl. i agreed for till now i had gathered back my courage to the levels. i was the same again. but he was not. he was ignoring me every time, lying to me. the new college life had changed him. he was not ready to quit smoking. and he was involved with girls in a flirtacious manner which was obviously offensive to me.he had time for everyone but not me. throught all this chaos he just had one thing to said , that his last wish is to see me pass class 12 as a topper and he wishes to me in my dream college. when i told him that his changed behavour is causing me mental disturbance which is not letting me study well , he said to part ways, i denied, he got rude , and then the same old procedure, he being rude and me asking the reason. he didnt replied. it enraged me and i said that i he should never dare to come back again.since past 40 days we are not in contact . i am not getting what all was this and why he was doing all this? i want him back but i dont know if he is single or not . i love him the same way but i dont knoe he loves me or not. if yes why did he left again and if no then why did he messaged again and again . plz help me solve my mental dilemmas and guide what to do next to improve the situation. which techniques should i adopt to make a person with this kind of psychology regret about leaving me. plz help !!
Juliette

October 28, 2015 at 3:46 am

Hi Chris,

I have 2 really simple questions…..

1) If a guy you’ve been dating who obviously likes you and has said so tells you that he respects you too much and knows that you’re the type of girl (his words) he would “want to have a love story with” but he cannot give you what you want now because he knows your expectations but tells you he still wants to see you but he has no time to see you often now,and asks you to wait for him in a few months he will be ready but then you get needy and demanding and dramatic and ruin things so he breaks it off and no longer wants to communicate with you, is there still a chance that this can be repaired through your methods?

We only dated for 2 months but he told me I was different from the other women he’s met since his 15 yr relationship ended.

2) How will he know that I’ve made improvements on myself if we are not FB friends or we don’t see each other at all?
Sarah

October 27, 2015 at 3:32 am

Hey Chris, hoping you can help me with my situation… first I want to say, I read your ebook, love the advice, and gave me hope! Anyway, here’s my story… So, my ex boyfriend and i were only together for like 5 to 6 months(Also, he lives half an hour away, so we couldn’t see each other all the time) but in that short time, he made me feel amazing, and I could definitely see that he was happy too. He was a complete gentleman, very kind and sweet to me, I was actually really happy for the first time in a long time. Well, he breaks up with me, saying he doesn’t think it’ll work out between us in the long run, because of our ‘differences’, which I know we could work them out, and we do actually have alot in common. Also, we always got along, so it didnt end badly or anything. Anyway, I’m heartbroken over this, and I miss him immensely. I came across your site very shortly afterward, and I’m now currently in no contact for 3 weeks now, and also have been trying to become an UG as well. Thing is, I’m desperately trying to figure out a first text to send when NC is over, I’m very insecure, and I’m kind of freaking out over it, I’m not always good at thinking of stuff to say.
Jessie

October 25, 2015 at 10:50 pm

Hi Chris,
My ex is 21 and I am 19. He was and still is my first love and I was his. We have both been in previous relationships but never felt that love was true like ours was. However, our relationship was complicated in many ways but one of the major ways was that he works for my Dad, although he was completely supportive of the relationship and remained professional after the breakup. We were just going on 6 months when he broke up with me entirely out of the blue. He said he still loved me and couldn’t really give me a solid reason as to why he wanted to break up but we did anyway. I told him that I thought he was giving up and making a mistake and he said that maybe he was but still let me go. Its been almost 3 weeks since then and I haven’t spoken to him and have been trying to better myself but I still can’t stop thinking about him. I’ve wanted to call but since reading your article, decided against it. I want to know how I can get back in touch with him and hopefully get him back. Thank you so much.

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1,759 thoughts on “How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Regret Letting You Go”