5 New Ways To Make Your Ex Regret Losing You

148 thoughts on “5 Ways To Make Your Ex Regret Losing You”

Roland

August 23, 2018 at 8:06 pm

My fiancee just broke up with me yesterday.
All because I was trying to teach her to always explain herself.
She went as far as blocking me on whatsapp already.
Switching off her phone.
Called her friend,she collected the phone and ended the call.
Texted her, telling her I wanted us to talk.
No replies.
Is she worth getting back, or should I just forget her.
I stil love her.
But it has always been me showing the 80% love and her showing 20%.

Chris Seiter

August 23, 2018 at 10:44 pm

Hi Roland….I know that sucks. And I know things are early stages and raw. Its best to give her space. Let her know this and that you will be also focusing on taking some time to heal and focus on being the best “you”. You should go to my home page and pick up one of my eBooks so you have a plan going forward!

Amy

August 20, 2018 at 10:20 pm

We were together for 6 years. A lot of back and forth due to insecurity, fighting, lack of communication, etc. I am trying NC (Gosh is that hard!) he is kind of seeing someone new, but I am fairly confident she is a rebound. He has told me he is heartbroken for us, and our child, and he just doesn’t know how he can go back on his finally decision (to end things). I went crazy, text gnat extreme ‍♀️ So I am trying to save face from that and do NC. How long should I go LNC (because of our son)?

Chris Seiter

August 20, 2018 at 11:23 pm

Hi Amy…I know NC can be challenging. Consider picking up my ebook, “The No Contact Rule Book” as it can really help you smooth out the difficult and also help you understand the entire process during and after. Just visit my home page for more details! I agree limited No Contact is pragmatic. I am thinking around 21 days (more or less). As my book get into, this principle is subject to adaptations depending on how things unfold.

Dani

August 20, 2018 at 8:11 pm

Hi I’m really struggling , my boyfriend and I broke up in may because we kept having the same reoccurring fights , essentially when an argument happened I want to sit down and talk it out and he ignored it and often gave me the silent treatment and then acted like nothing happened and would say hey what’s your plans after maybe 3 weeks zero talking . That hurt me so we got in this bad cycle. But we love eachother . We had three major blow outs where he once threw my purse out the window and we said things like I hate you and get the fuck out etc…. and looking back never pinpointing the reason. I was mad he didn’t want to come to my promotion happy hour and he said it wasn’t like I was dying tomorrow and he was nervous to meet all my friends at once … any way we broke up after a major fight in may. Then we ended up going on a trip together in July that was amazing . We talk daily and we act like we are dating in many ways without a label including sex. Last week we had another huge fight because he invited me to a show and I drove an hour to meet him at the train so we could go together and let him know traffic was bad so maybe we could take the next train 7 min after the first one. When I arrived he had left me there . And left at 5:15 instead of 5:27 and didn’t wait for me. I started crying at the station and felt left behind . How could someone who loved me let me drive an hour to meet him and then leave me? After the show I wanted to talk about it but instead he yelled at me and said I ruined the show cuz I wasn’t relaxed and I’m the one that missed the train ( it was a 40 min train and the show didn’t start til 8pm so it wasn’t a matter of being late) we had another major fight this time we both had been drinking ( not drunk more a little buzzed) and he said he hated me and he wasn’t in love anymore and we were done . That was 4 days ago as he hasn’t apologized or spoke to me….

I’m desperate I want to make things work and I probably shouldn’t have tried to talk to him at midnight on a work night and had better self control I just felt so hurt he left me at the station and felt super unloved and wanted to cry …
We have been dating for two years . Do we have a chance of working things out ? I’m worried he will never talk to me again… but I am also not reaching out because I feel so betrayed he said all those mean things and I read about giving a guy space …

I admit since May 8th I’ve been needy and smothering , but I didn’t know what to do and we still have acted almost the same as when we were dating other than a title sex ( but not just sex ) , hanging many times a week, couple trip, snuggling saying I love you etc

He said such nasty things I’m not sure this is fixable what do you think ?!

Please help

Chris Seiter

August 20, 2018 at 11:35 pm

Hi Dani!

I am sorry he said such nasty things. I know that can be painful. Don’t be too hard on yourself. It is a natural reaction for people who feel rejected to be needy and smothering. I think you should go into no contact given the ugly way things ended 4 days ago. To learn more about having a solid ex recovery plan, I encourage you to take a look at my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” so you have a blueprint to follow such that you don;t end up in the same cycle over and over again.

Mary

August 20, 2018 at 2:28 pm

He says he is never coming back and we have absolutely no chance, he’s just done giving me his time. We have a 6 year old, and I am having a HARD time. We had a lot of fights, some explosive, but some good times mingled in there too. Do I really need to give it up?

Chris Seiter

August 20, 2018 at 8:12 pm

I know a lot of guys who use words like this, then later pulls back from them. The fact that you both have a 6 year old together indicates to me this relationship story is probably not over.

C

August 20, 2018 at 12:22 pm

Hi 🙂 Nice article.

My ex came by to get his stuff a week or so ago (there was a lot, we lived together) and said some things like “You need to drop that attitude”, “people are already saying I’m doing too much for you” (by ‘letting’ me keep the flat) and “you don’t want to make any enemy of me”. I don’t think I was rude to him – I calmly and politely told him where to find various things when he asked.

He was still there when I returned, I slipped up and asked him how he was. He told me ‘like you was’, meaning I guess pretty broken hearted. He had asked me before I asked him and I just said ‘great, thanks’.

A couple of days ago after about a week or so of complete no contact (not even to discuss bills etc) he messaged me on Facebook and said if I needed to talk to him about the flat or bills, I should text him. Then he blocked me.

So yeah, I’m a tad puzzled! Would definitely appreciate any advice.

Chris Seiter

August 20, 2018 at 8:15 pm

Hi C!

Sounds like he is still emotional about things…carrying some resentment, so the space apart should benefit. So it seems the NC is working as he is wanting attention from you, but his emotions can carry him in another direction as well. All pretty normal post breakup. Just stick with the blueprint I offer in my ex recovery program discussed in my ebooks.

Tina

August 20, 2018 at 5:54 am

What if your ex is not a social media type. For instance my ex is bad with whatsapp and facebook which are the ways in which I can get his attention. some how we got to communicate recently and he seem to have something to say that he couldn’t say as he thought he was going to meet with me but we talked on phone rather. however, I know for sure that if we meet, we will get to talk about the things you have mentioned in this post. Is it OK for me to call him and request we meet. I don’t want to get back with him but I want him to really regret making that choice for us to separate. I await your response.

Chris Seiter

August 20, 2018 at 8:19 pm

Hi Tina!

I agree if he is not into social media, that takes one tool out of the toolbox, but it is far from a deal breaker. Best not to call to talk about the reasons for the breakup if you have no interest in making the relationship work. It would likely be a lose-lose. I know you want to get some things off your mind. Write it down in your journal. Get it all down. Then read it to yourself. Turn burn it and put it behind you. Anything else your write in your journal should be more aspirational and future oriented.

Tracey

August 19, 2018 at 7:47 pm

My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years we lived together for 2 we didn’t have a fight we weren’t close for about a week than one morning he asked if I got time off work to go on vacation I said no he never talked to me about going anywhere he said ok illl make plans the next morning I got up and he was gone didn’t say anything to me 5 days later I saw pictures posted on Facebook from a mutual friend that’s how I nee where he was I texted him and called he did answer said I’m not ruining his vacation and hung up never said anything so I texted him and told him that I can’t believe he did this and had no regard what his actions have on me he never answered so I texted him I know where I stand and it’s not me I moved my stuff out of the house before he got home when he got back all I got from him was that he wanted his stuff back he said I had one last chance if I give him his stuff that got mixed up with mine I told him I would but I want my cat and dog no answer and he has deleted and blocked me on Facebook

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 11:26 pm

Hi Tracey!

First of all, 3 years together counts a lot in my book. Roots get established and that can help later in bringing you together. YOu will want a plan of action going forward. That is what I help people with. Go to my site’s home page and check out some of the tools and resources available to you.

Michelle

August 19, 2018 at 9:44 am

I wonder how I’ll be able to do this as I am 11 days into NO Contact, he has a new gf who adores him, and works with him, we were on and off for 2 yrs, he broke my heart, told me a day after my bday that he and his current gf were done, was intimate with me(I know…big mistake) and then we were talking for a while till he dropped the bomb on me a week later that he was back with her and all they had was a fight…I was appalled, he said it wasn’t fair to string me along and wasn’t fair to her either to be with me. He actually referred to me as a side chic, he was my first love, I was almost 30 when I met him(was29 and some months), broke up at 31, after a lot of back and forth and non commitment on his part, he always initiated the break up, cheated, and just when I thought the ugliness was over, he does this. I actually feel scared and jaded altogether about guys now. We all work as Doctors in the same Hospital but I am in a different Department while they are in the same Dept and same floor. The gf even contacted me once to tell me she was scared to date him cos something’s he said didn’t add up, but I was careful not to slander him in any way and told her that she should go with her instincts and heart and respectfully not contact me on the matter again. They are happy now, and I’m stuck, tried to be the ungettable girl but I feel too broken and in a rut. I need your help to first get myself back on track. He really hurt me and just moved on like I meant nothing to him

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 11:44 pm

Hi Michelle!

Not all guys are stinkers. There are some real good ones out there. But certainly, a big part of my program is about self recovery and self improvement and learning find the sweeter moments, without looking back and the bad memories. You can do all of this while in No Contact. I wrote a 247 page eBook called “The No Contact Rule Book” for people who are trying to optimize the time during the NC period. About half of the book is about recovery ideas and principles. So consider that as a resource. Also, consider joining my Private Facebook Support Group (1900 members right now) that is geared at helping people. I also suggest you watch some of my Videos and Podcasts as there are some really great speakers and experts I have interviewed on matter like this.

Andrea

August 18, 2018 at 9:07 pm

If there has been no contact from 45 days and he has blocked you, will it still work? He left me for another woman and he seemed to be very happy and I don’t feel he is even thinking about me or missing me. My quiz score is 68

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 12:24 am

Hi Andrea….i know it can feel that way….that he doesn’t care. But often that is not true. Often he is mirroring your emotions and thoughts. Perhaps he thinks the grass is greener and perhaps he may discover its not. For now, as I cover in my program, keep the focus on your own recovery and healing and seeking the be the best version of “you”.

Jenette

August 18, 2018 at 6:01 pm

My ex and I broke up. He was very committed and told his friends even but after some time he said he regretted committing. But when he was committed, he was really serious. Anyway he somehow started thinking I’m not “the one” and he soon ghosted me and I waited and gave him space. But his friend told me to break up with him as he said he is waiting for me to break up. So we broke up. We are friends now though. How can I get him back and make him realized I’m the one?

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 12:27 am

Hi Jenette….yes..some guys are afraid to committ for all different kinds of reasons. And yes, sometimes a guy can get ahead of himself, thinking he knows his feelings about what he wants…then later upon reflection and some life experiences, realizes he was wrong about some things he thought. Best to have an ex recovery program you can follow to optimize your chances. Go take a look at my ebook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” and some of the ohter resources and tools found on my site’s home page!

Mariana

August 18, 2018 at 2:25 pm

My ex broke up with me two weeks ago, he blocked me from all social media except his phone. I’ve been applying the NC rule, but I’m not sure if that will work for me. We dated for about 8 months. He said he lost himself in the relationship and that he didn’t like how his friends think he’s changed. I promised him he would not hear from me. And I mean how could he, he blocked me.

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 12:32 am

Just know Mariana…that it is still very early in the process. Guys will sometimes do rash things out of anger or resentment…like blocking. But you are not totally blocked, so that says something. Make sure you understand how to employ NC correctly. I discuss in great detail in my ebook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” and “The No Contact Rule Book”.

G

August 18, 2018 at 4:32 am

my ex and I were together for a year and he broke up w me because it didn’t feel the same way it used to. In the beggining I begged for him back but then I went on 2 weeks of no contact— until of course I saw him on the 4th of July. From the fourth to 2 weeks ago (so about a month) he and I were hanging out a lot and even hooking up sometimes. I thought he wanted me back, but he even invited me to the beach with his family but then cancelled and we started fighting. For roughly a week I was a text GNAT. I was afraid. Later that week he said he needed space, and I agreed saying time would be good. Flash forward one week to now — he started dating a new girl. What does this mean? Is it a rebound? (We’ve been broken up for two months but talked long after) my quiz said I have a 70% shot. Im in no contact however I saw him at a party the day I found out about his new girl and ignored him when he tried to talk, later apologizing and saying I didn’t know how to explain. We talked some, then I told him I needed more space and that I wanted him to be happy whatever it took (hinting at the new gf). What now. I’m lost. My plan is no contact but I’m starting to feel hopeless unless, of course, this is a rebound then maybe I do have a chance. Help!!!

Chris Seiter

August 19, 2018 at 12:34 am

Hi G!

Oooops, breaking no contact is so tempting and it can lead to things kind of blowing up. But no worries…it happens. You do have my eBook, right? Because it will instruct you on all the things you should be doing during and after NC!

Sally

April 18, 2018 at 2:03 pm

It’s a week since we broke up but it seems like my ex has lost all interest in me. He ended the relationship by saying “I don’t want this to be completely over, I just don’t know what I want and want to be alone for some time, I want to marry you in the future and have kids with you”. He was really in love with me and told my Im the one. He hasn’t told his parents or his friends. But still he is VERY distant and like he doesn’t care about me at all, that is what I don’t understand…

Chris Seiter

April 18, 2018 at 10:35 pm

Hi Sally….have you gotten into my ebook, Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro? (website Menu/Products link). Indeed, you will find several good resources there. I think you should have a plan in place and execute it. I see upside here, so its a function of optimizing chances. Creating a little space for him to grapple with his thoughts would be good and benefit you both. The things he said leaves room for re-igniting the connection.

Sarah

April 17, 2018 at 9:01 pm

Hi any expert that can weigh in on my situation? I think I’m doing everything right I about EBR and I also am on the fb group. My ex and have been together since high school. 5 years off and on. To be exact we broke up once before for 8 months and then he came back. Now we have been back together for 3 years and he broke up with me three weeks ago. NC and I’ve been doing my best to work on my holy trinity and I honestly do think I’m an UG. Now my ex is 22 and I’m 24, I think he needs to grow and mature but he doesn’t seem to want anything to do with me and has been talking to girls not that I blame him I think we do need to grow and work on ourselves. Just hoping he’ll realize what he has at some point.

Chris Seiter

April 17, 2018 at 10:51 pm

Hi Sarah. Knowing each other for arouond 5 years helps build traction. Certainly, as you say, there are thing for you guys to work on and you are off to a great start. IF you are looking for a comprehensive blueprint on handling breakups, consider Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro, if you have not already. You can learn more by going to the Menu/Products section of my website. I think you guys have a solid chance.

Jen

April 8, 2018 at 5:26 am

Hi,

My ex and I were together for 2 and a half years and we just went on a trip to Arizona, New York, and Europe and had a blast, everything was great. We came back, I saw him again a few days later and everything was great. A few days later he invited me to a work event to visit him and everything was normal, the next day we texted all day like normal. Then the next day (Monday) he was short via text and I jokingly asked him “are you planning on dumping me?” And he responded with “I don’t think this is an appropriate convo to have over text”. I called him and he mumbled a lot of “I don’t know”s and said he needed space and we could meet up and talk on Saturday his next day off. We had no contact until he asked to come over friday instead of Saturday. He came over and just sat quiet for a while. I’ve suspected something deeper going on with him over the pst few months maybe depression, possibly bipolar disorder. He’s had eradic and impulsive ideas and actions and nothing has seemed to make him happy, except me. I expressed my thoughts on that to him and he agreed there might be something going on with him. He ended up saying he wanted to be alone and was done and we broke up and he left. He has strict parents that have been very hard on him all his life; so I think some insecurity/self sabotaging thing may be going on here too. Never during the breakup did he say he doesn’t love me, and when I told him I know he still loves me, tears fell down his cheek. I know he does and he told me he missed me during the week we didn’t speak before meeting up. I truly feel in my heart this breakup isn’t about me or that he doesn’t love me and I feel he will regret this very soon. Will he realize he made a mistake and come back? Will the NC make him reach out eventually?

Chris Seiter

April 11, 2018 at 2:31 am

Hi Jen….yes I think it will. That is what it is designed to do.

Kenz

March 29, 2018 at 8:56 pm

I am still blocked on social media but my phone isn’t. I am also close to his friends.

Chris Seiter

April 3, 2018 at 1:54 am

I think the most important key is that you can still communicate through phone when the time comes.

Kenz

March 28, 2018 at 10:46 pm

Hi, my ex and I were together for a year and a half. Since January we have been arguing steadily. A few weeks ago he decided to call it quits. He said that he wanted to focus on himself and not our relationship. After that he blocked me on everything, but then unblocked me and called me a little over a week ago. I didn’t answer the call but I asked him what he wanted the next day. He said he needed to know the name of a website. He said wasn’t interested in getting back together at the moment. Since then I’ve started doing NC.

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 29, 2018 at 8:34 pm

Hi Kenz,

Stick to at least 30 days and be active in posting in social media. What website was he asking?

Sara

March 6, 2018 at 1:49 am

I probably already know what you will say..lol but here is my situatiin…
Im in my mid 30s i have 3 children from a previous relationship. I met someone who is in their mid 20s…we hit it off immediately. We have mutual friends btw. Within months he had told me he loved me. He had only been in 1 serious relationship prior to us. He had come around around my kids a few times and he treated them well. Anyways he never really would commit to me with a “title” and he had said he had never dated anyone with kids before. So he was hesitant on it but decided he would try because he wanted to be with me. Well fast forward a year and a half later and we still date..ive been around his family but he says he wants to be with me but he cant see himself raising someone elses kids. But everytime hes tried to cut it off..it only lasts a few days..i know he loves me..he has talked about kids with me and marriage but a week later he psychs himself out and tells me he cant do it. So this last time he just ignored me..told me the only way we can part ways is to stop contact…we both feel this amazing connection and i know if he just tried it with the kids it wouldnt be so bad. These last few days have been so hard on me and i know he misses me but says he has to push his feelings away. Is there any hope that he may change his mind? He has told me hes never felt this strong for anyone and he doesnt know if this is the end..and in my heart i dont feel like this is the end of us..do u think time away will make him rethink things?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 10, 2018 at 3:21 pm

Hi Sara,

You said he treated with your kids well, what do you mean by him trying with your kids?

Beonka

March 2, 2018 at 8:20 pm

No not really….He’s done something similar before…when we very first got together he did something like this with another girl. He was posting how greatful he was that she was in his life and I guess things didn’t work out between them and he came back to me. Then he did it again with his first son’s mom after we had broke things off and got back together. Now things are a bit different because my son is involved and he seems to be into this girl and she’s into him. We have a car together because it was meant for him to be able to pick up the kids in case of an emergency but instead of him handling his responsibilities with the car he’s been using it to take this new girl on dates and support her at her plays (she’s a college theater student) he says he doesn’t wanna be bothered with me because it’s too much drama and this girl brings him peace. In a way I feel the same but I still do love him and never stopped. I just wanted him to man up and handle his responsibilities but all he’s done is throw this new girl up in my face and it hurts because I truly want my family……Please help me

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 6, 2018 at 10:03 am

We can’t make another person change..it will always be their decision, and if it’s because of you, just be grateful.. That’s why you gotta have standards and practice it so you can choose the right people..check this one:
EBR 056: My Ex Boyfriend Cheated On Me Multiple Times… What Do I Do?

Beonka

February 28, 2018 at 11:43 am

My situation is kinda tricky. We have a child together and he basically stopped talking to me. He started acting weird because I had left him due to him being more loyal to his family instead of me and his son (he literally chose them over us all the time….put their needs before ours etc etc…) but we had never stopped talking. That was until around October….he started acting strange and his attitude towards me got worse (Hanging up in my face, claiming he was “too busy” to communicate about our son or communicate with me at all) his behavior got so bad I had to block him because it was downright hateful towards me and our son. He changed his number and called my phone claiming he wanted to talk about our son. Then a week later called me out of the blue to say “thank you for being a beautiful mother to our son and I wanna move forward in raising our son” then not even a few days later he posts on Facebook “4 months ago I met the most beautiful and intelligent woman I’ve ever known in my life and I’m becoming a better man for her” and he tags this new girl in it. She only liked it….no hearts, didn’t like any of his other pics. Obviously I was destroyed….he cut me and my baby out to make time for this new girl. She’s a college theater student and does plays downtown and it’s pics of him supporting her, taking her out on lavish dates, and going to college parties with her (he’ll be 29 this year and hasn’t stepped foot in a college a day in his life ) he met her at his job (I took him to the job interview initially and it’s also downtown) and all of this hurts and sickens me. I hate him but in a weird way still love him and I’m heartbroken by all of this. Some key factors in my situation is that I don’t think she has a car…she’s a transfer student from out of state and everything she does or needs is right downtown. His car is in both me and his name and I was the only one that had been paying the note (I stopped when he started acting weird) so now the car is $2000 in debt. Their relationship is based on lies….she actually called me on Facebook messenger and she had questions for me about him so I answered them…come to find out he’s been lying to her about me, the car, and the real reason he hasn’t seen our son (he basically has neglected our son to go out and be with her and live that college student lifestyle and forgot all about his responsibilities) once she found out he called me the next day to apologize and to tell me he’s in love with her. But I don’t think it’s that deep on her end because now she knows he lied. I know I’m stupid for wanting him back but I do because I want a real chance at having my family back (we’ve been together off and on for 6 years) he says I’m in his heart like all his other ex’s but he doesn’t wanna be with me. I cut contact with him and made him start doing more for our son, but ever since I did that he’s starting to act strange. I have completely limited our contact to text only due to our son….but he insists on calling. I’m constantly having to remind him (text only please) and he’ll come up with excuses “I’m driving…please call” or “I’m at the store for our son please answer” but you can text me while you’re at the store and if you’re driving then we don’t need to talk at all. I just moved into my own apartment and he dropped off some diapers for our son on my front porch and he had to text me to comment “I’m proud of you for getting your own place for you and our son” then out of the blue he calls again….this time just to say “I wanna talk to our son”. Then he called again a few days later saying he wanted to buy our son a bed (Of course I ignored his call and made him text) and he kept on asking me weird questions…”what kind of bed did you get him?” (Me) “A toddler bed” (him) “Shouldn’t he be in a twin sized bed?” (Me) “no he isn’t even 2 yet just buy him a crib sized/toddler mattress and call it a day please” (Him) “can you send me a pic of the bed you got him?” (Me) “For what? Just buy the mattress and drop it off please” (Him) “Are you still moving into your apartment?” (Me thinking to myself) “WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?!?!? I JUST HAD YOU DROP DIAPERS OFF AT MY FRONT PORCH…..OBVIOUSLY IM STILL MOVING!!”. Now personally I think he’s been driving past my place because for him to ask that he must’ve known that I haven’t been at home at night because I’m still getting things moved in and it’s safer for me and my son to crash at my friend’s place until everything is moved in. Recently his girlfriend hasn’t posted any new pics or updates of them, nothing for Valentine’s Day, nothing at all….(nothing since January 24th) I know it’s a lot but I really do want a fair chance with my own little family (we were living with his parents for the majority of our relationship) and I’ve been reading your articles. I’ve cut verbal communication with him and keep our conversations short. He’s the one initiating all the conversations now, he can’t seem to grasp the “no talking…text only” concept. I’ve started working out at a gym, and going to counseling for all of this plus my other issues. I found out that he’s living with his cousin (5 minuets away from my apartment ) and he might be in between her place and his cousin’s. So this is all the info about my situation….what words of advice can you give me?

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