How To Prevent A Breakup With Your Boyfriend When You Know It's Coming

399 thoughts on “How To Prevent A Breakup With Your Boyfriend When You Know It’s Coming”

hopeless

June 12, 2015 at 1:50 am

LDR ex dumped me out of the blue a month ago — after a fight. We reconnected 2-3 weeks later to discuss how I could grow and communicate better in fights and sounded like there was hope. I flew into town a few days later to see him, and it was a complete 180. He boxed up my stuff and said we had the very smallest chance maybe someday in the future. After that I practically begged him for a chance and we ended up with him getting angry telling me about all of our fights that he remembered and said he doesn’t want me to give him reasons for giving us a chance. He also said he did not love me. I have since not contacted with him and has been 11 days. A few days ago he updated his social media pics — to old but very good pictures of him — and it is obvious he is out on the dating apps. Is there any reason for hope of us getting back together? Is there advice? Keep no contact for 30 days total?

hopeless

June 12, 2015 at 2:37 am

also, know you say “One of the most common ways is to go on the prowl for girls to fill the hole that you left in his heart.” but when he told me he didn’t love me, he really believes it. He has never told me he loved me in the relationship but I have told him. 13 months into our relationship (7 months of ldr at that point) I said ILY, and he said ty. then 2 months later he says he “doesn’t know what love means to him”. Though through his actions, he treated me just like he treated his family, so I thought he loved me. So is there still a chance.
hopeless

June 12, 2015 at 2:00 am

Also to add. When we met up in person I had made a point to tell him i no longer follow him on social media (though obviously I still check the limited stuff if i see his pictures changing) and i have deleted his phone number and texts from my phone. The only way to talk really is e-mail or re-establishing social media connections.

Liz

May 24, 2015 at 10:15 pm

Hi,
My boyfriend and I (your probably sick of hearing that beginning), Have been dating for 8 months, before that 6 months then with an on and off relationship. For a couple months we’ve been really on each others cases, on and off. Today he wanted to break up with me and after talking, we decided to take a break, I want to stay with him and he’s unsure. We aren’t talking for a couple days and it’s tearing me apart not knowing what he is thinking or what he wants to do. It’s easier for him to block all emotion, and me to face them head on. He is extremely emotionless at times, and I, too emotional, I’m seeking medical help for having depression, but I really don’t know what to do.

Chris Seiter

June 2, 2015 at 2:17 am

Haha that makes 23,400 my boyfriend and I beginnings…

How long total have you benen dating?

8 months including the on/off relationship.

Barbora

May 21, 2015 at 9:29 pm

Hey,
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 6 months now. Yesterday he told me he wants to break up. He stated that im being too silent. I must admit that Its true, but I see it more as A problem we share – he’has turned silent as well. It lasts maybe month or two, I guess we were both so stressed out by our finals that we noticed just now. Well, I did. He is aware of this longer then I. But still, I think we should try to fix this together. My bf wants me to make some improvements, so im just gonna try, and maybe he will cooperate. What do you think would help our relationship, except that we need to talk about this problem? Sometimes I feel like theres nothing to say…
Anon

May 16, 2015 at 6:30 am

Hi Chris,

I’ve been together with my boyfriend for 6 months now. We have some history, it didn’t work out then because he wasn’t ready for commitment. So I broke it off but after 3 months we were talking again and in a relationship.

The first months of the relationship were amazing but after a while we started talking less. I was scared he was afraid of commitment again (I now realize it’s a natural thing), so I was freaking out. One day I was being really nice, and the next day I was kinda distant and afraid he didn’t like me anymore just like before. After 2 months of this, he told me two xays days ago that he’s not sure if he wants to continue this, but not sure of breaking up as well. He told me that he is not unhappy and he’s not sure if breaking up is the right thing to do, because it can be amazing too. But it’s really hard for him to deal with me sometimes. So he doesn’t know.

I never realized that the way I was acting is that bad. I’m seeing a doctor next week, because I think it might be a depression. He told me he forgives me, because he knows I’m not doing it on purpose and knows that I’m going through a hard time.

I asked him if talking to him and seeing him is fine, and he said yes. But he’s only talking to me when I start a conversation, and even then he isn’t really responsive. Which I expected because it was our first big argument and things are weird.

I’m afraid that when I start talking about our relationship, he’s gonna freak out, because he told me a couple of times that he doesn’t know yet what to do. I don’t want to drive him insane with relationship-talk, because that’s what I’ve doing for the last couple of months.
I’m also afraid that if I give him space, things are gonna end.. I feel like not talking will only make things worse and that he’s gonna break up anyway :(. I thought about talking just once a day/every other day, just about neutral things but he’s not being really responsive. Should I give him some space for a couple of days?

Chris Seiter

May 19, 2015 at 5:55 pm

Then don’t bring it up. Let him bring it up.

Taylor

May 14, 2015 at 8:00 pm

Hi Chris! My boyfriend and I have been together 5 months and are long distance. For a while we were fighting due to my own insecurities and he tried to break up with me a little over a month ago. Since then, I have not let my past insecurities get in the way of our relationship and he knows I have been making an effort to show that I trust and care about him. We don’t fight anymore, but he has been more distant than ever, despite my efforts. When I asked him about it, he claimed he was too stressed with work and his kids, which I understand. He just came to visit a week ago and things were pretty good! But yesterday I asked him about me moving temporarily to be with him, and he didn’t seem too excited He said he wanted to be with me, but the timing of our relationship wasn’t good. He needs a few days to think things over and decide if he wants to continue this relationship. He called this morning and acted as if nothing happened. I tried talking to him like you said, but he just said he needed time to think. Should I just continue on like everything is ok? Or should I go NC until he reaches his decision? And is there anything I can do or say when we do have “the talk”? I would like to have an in-person conversation with him when we were planning on seeing each other in a couple weeks, but not sure I can make him hold out.

Chris Seiter

May 19, 2015 at 5:25 pm

Have you read my pages on long distance relationships?

Anonymous 2

May 8, 2015 at 4:18 am

Hi,

My boyfriend just recently told me that he is thinking about ending it because his spark died. How do we recover his spark? How can I help him WANT to reignite his spark?

I have a hunch he has a fear of commitment as he has mentioned that he has relationship insecurities. However, he has never really specified as to what or why and I don’t want to pressure him into telling me.

Please help!
nicole

April 27, 2015 at 6:46 pm

Hi, my live in bf of 5 yrs is trying to brea up with me. I’ve been on/off depressed and have gained weight for the last 2. he said he stayed because when I am “really myself” I’m his dream girl. you think having such a sweet partner would snap me out of it but it didn’t. last night he made a huge dinner and he broke it off. after we showered together and fell asleep together- fighting off the lust.. both of us crying.. I feel like he is forcing himself to walk away but his heart doesn’t want to (we even we’re trying to get pregnant a month ago but realized it will be difficult for is due to his seen count).. do I have a chance of fixing this? my fear is I will be my best self again once I’m alone but I won’t be able to be with him again.
Emilee

April 6, 2015 at 7:55 am

Hi Chris,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and we’ve actually been through a lot. When we first started talking it’s like we just clicked and we are not total opposites, but we definitely have a few differences. In this case it worked for us. When they say opposites attract they were talking about us. We were pretty much inseparable for these last 2 years. We moved in together about a year into our relationship and we never had an issue. We’ve never really been the type to argue, but when we did we always sat down and figured it out before We ended the conversation. Then afterwards everything was normal and we continued as if it never happened. It’s not like that now. He recently spent a year in prison and because I love him so much, I stayed. I’ve actually stayed with him through more than what I should have. He has been in and out of jail because he had a addiction. Since he’s been out of prison he hasn’t taken anything, but his addiction was never that bad. Just occasional. When he got out is when we started having problems and arguments we’ve never had before. I should mention he has a little girl with another female and she’s still completely in love with him and she always has been. She hasn’t been a problem until now. Because of his addiction she has kept their daughter from him for as long as I can remember until now. About a week after he got out of prison she started bringing their daughter back around. Which, I’m glad he’s finally stepping up as a father, but I don’t like the baby mama. Recently he’s stayed the night at her apartment so he could see his daughter. I’m not naive or stupid, but my gut doesn’t twll me that he’s had sex with her and since I know him so well, I would know. He hasn’t been able to hide anything from me since day one, but also, he’s never really tried to hide anything from me. He tells me when he’s going over there and when she’s bringing their daughter over to his parents. At this point he’s seeing her more than me. We’re both out of a car right now, but she’s not so it easy for her. He tells me even things I don’t want to hear because he is my boyfriend and he wants to be honest with me, I guess. I lived with his parents while he was in prison and we had plans to pay bills at his parents house until we saved up enough money to get another apartment together. Well, a few days after he got out he decided that we should live separate. Meaning I go back to my parents house and he stay at his and we’ll see each other all the time. He just thought it would be best so it didn’t put too much pressure on his parents. I agreed after trying to convince him that wasn’t the best way to go about it. He is a very blunt guy and he always has been and I do like that about him. So, I expect pure honesty when we have a serious talk because that’s what he’s always given me. When I ask him what we are he says we’re boyfriend and girlfriend, but we’re just taking it slow. When I asked him about breaking up he has always said no because that’s not what he wants. He tells me he wants to be with me, but he’s just trying to adjust to everything again and especially seeing his daughter. His baby mama was very controlling of him while they were together and she threatens to take away his daughter if he’s with another girl that isn’t her. She’s even messaged me that herself. We haven’t broken up yet, but there have definitely been multiple conversations about it. He tells me that he wants to continue to be with me, but he’s confused and he doesn’t want to be tied completely down. Which, makes me confused at the same time. He used to call me baby, babe, and sweetie all the time, but now he does it about once every other conversation. I hate that as well. He still tells me he loves me. Sometimes he says it first and sometimes I do. We normally always talk before we go to bed unless one of us is too tired, which we understand. But everytime I try to talk to him about our relationship, he doesn’t want to talk about it. He says we’ve talked about it a lot and he shouldn’t have to explain himself all the time. Which, we haven’t. And when we do talk about it, We never get anywhere. Either the conversation will end with everything being “fine” where we’re laughing and being sweet but mean while I’m still hurt because I don’t know what we are anymore and I feel like I’m slowly losing him. And when I tell I’m that he always says your not losing me, I’m right here, but it feels like I am. I’m trying so hard to save my relationship that I turned to your article. I haven’t tried it yet, but I will tomorrow when he calls me. I guess, I’m hoping you could read my story and give me a little of your insight about what he might be thinking since you’re a male. And I’m so hoping you could give me some great advice. I know our relationship is worth saving and some times I think he wants to save it as well and sometimes I don’t think he does. So, please, if you can, help me. I’m at my wits end and I dont want to lose him.
-Emilee
Erika

April 4, 2015 at 4:24 am

Hi Chris,

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. Of course we’ve had our own share of ups and downs. But ive noticed that lately he’s been different. He joined the Army last november and while he was away for training he was soo good to me. He was telling me that they made him learn how to appreciate what he has, was talking about marriage, was telling me that everything was going to be better, and overall he’s a better man (has more discipline, more mature, and knows what he wants to do with his life). He’s in AIT school right now (so our relationship is long distance) and thats when it all started to go a little downhill. He’s been more “mean” so to speak. He was telling me in the beginning that something about himself feels off, that he doesnt feel whole and he doesnt know why. He seems unhappy.. He would get mad over little things, and at times just doesnt want to talk to me. At times he would be rude to me and talk to me in a disrespectful way. I’ve attempted to tell him how i feel and he either says im making it all about myself or he has nothing to say/doesnt know what to say. We’ve also been fighting more often, over stupid little things. He also seems more demanding, like it has to be what he wants. He’s sexually frustrated and thats understandable since i havent seen him since february. He keeps asking me to “spice” things up a bit and send him pictures but i would say no because it makes me uncomfortable to do it. And that really upsets him to the point where he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. Last night we got into an argument over the pictures and he didnt talk to me till today, where the argument continued. It went downhill so fast and he broke up with me out of nowhere. He said “i think we should go our separate ways. I’m done. I want to move on. Not from you but from everything.” He says that he loves me, but im so confused and hurt I dont know what to think. The last thing he said to me was ” I’m gonna try and sleep this off and think about this hopefully I’ll let you know tomorrow morning. Please Erika if you have any feelings for me or value what we had or have in any way you’ll respect this decision. ” I dont know if its him joining the army thats making him be this way, or maybe his new friends influencing him. I really dont want this to end.. Not after everything we’ve been through. Please i need your advice..

Thank you,
Erika.
Marie

April 2, 2015 at 10:43 am

Hi Chris,

Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 2 years, and were seeing each other on/off (mostly on) for about a year before that. I place all my trust in him and he is currently studying to be a teacher. I went on a 4 day college trip to a foreign country and just got home yesterday. At the moment he is in a college course that consists of him staying in a house with other guys, doing classes in the mornings and activities in the evening. (This will be relevant). We are usually in constant communication and talk and see each other every day possible (keeping college in mind). But while on my trip he barely spoke to me. He didn’t text me 2 of the days which is really unusual for us. He put this down to being busy with the course and having no coverage (it’s a very remote area). Am I over reacting to think something is wrong? We’ve talked about breaking up some time in the future as were very young and both agreed that we feel we might be missing out on experiences as a young person. We’ve had ups and downs for the past 2 months or so but still mostly ups.. I know he loves me but I fear he is loving me less or since he got a taste of freedom being separated from me for those 4 days with no communication, wants more freedom. I’m really scared and I fear I am too in love with him. Please help.

admin

April 3, 2015 at 12:58 am

Yes that does seem unusual for him to not text you like that.

What do you mean that you are too in love with him?

You might be coming off as desperate.
Marie

April 3, 2015 at 12:48 pm

We talked and what he said made some sense in relation to why he didn’t, or couldn’t text. He said that basically, he’s scared of becoming older (as he’s about to turn 20) and fears that in years to come we are going to look back and think we missed out on a lot of experiences when we were young, especially if the relationship doesn’t last. He says he is scared of “the unknown” which is how to live without me, which I find odd. He also said that he is feeling like he has to force a breakup now, because if we let it, the relationship would continue for years into the future, and therefore we would definitely let the experiences as a young person pass us by. I feel like he is forcing a breakup just INCASE we don’t last forever and look back wishing we made the most of our youth. I told him a breakup is supposed to happen naturally, and it all goes back to the talk we had a few months back. I’m so confused and don’t know what to think or make of the situation. I understand he is scared of growing up, and I’m his first ever relationship. He is quite immature in a sense of he wouldn’t really seem like nearly 20, But is he just using this as an excuse to be free and single? Or is he really just scared of becoming an adult and want to make the most of the carefree years he has left?
Marie

April 3, 2015 at 12:58 pm

He also is looking at this as just a break, and said he knows for definite we’ll get back together in a few weeks, months. He said he mightn’t even last 2 days with the breakup if he goes ahead with it, and can see us just getting back together In a day or two. He seems very confused also. I’m so frustrated as I can’t get speaking to him during his course.

Allie

March 28, 2015 at 1:51 pm

Hi, Chris! My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and half. At the beginning he was very in love with me and made a lot of promises to me (I will marry you, I will always be here for you and I will never leave, I will do whatever I can to get through everything with you, etc.). Ever since February, he has been having second thoughts. We went through a rough patch a month ago and he wanted to break up, but we added a little distance between us and it made him really happy again for a little bit. Then after we went out to celebrate our year and a half anniversary, he just said he didn’t want to be with me. He said he wanted to be single and he wasn’t happy. He said he used to be but now he’s not. Yesterday he broke up with me, but we’re meeting today to discuss things and I’m hoping to get him to try again. We’ve had a lot of phone calls lately about breaking up but I’ve been able to talk him out of it each time. He’s still not happy though. I just don’t know what to say to him to change his mind again, because I really want him as my boyfriend. I just need to prove to him that I am worth trying for. He is very close-minded about this and it’s very hard to get him to work it out with me. I’m doing everything I can and he isn’t doing anything for me. What should I do? Any suggestions? I just want to save this relationship.

admin

March 29, 2015 at 2:29 pm

Typically speaking “meeting up” doesn’t work.

the only thing that will probably work is NC and then re-igniting his attractoin.
Allie

March 29, 2015 at 5:16 pm

Okay! We didn’t end up meeting yesterday because I cancelled and said I had “other plans”. I’m starting to work out and do other things to make myself look like I’m doing okay without him. People have been telling me I’m way out of his league anyway so hopefully he will come around. Thanks!

Anonymous

March 21, 2015 at 12:26 am

Wow! This was amazing! It worked for me. He didn’t breakup with me, but he did say that now he doesn’t see me the same way as before.
I realized I was too emotional and believe me I feel like I have learned how to control my emotions. I think that being too emotional is what he didn’t like.
I read the Chase Theory: How to make your Ex chase you again.
I know this doesn’t exactly apply to me because we did not break up but I was thinking about applying the no-contact rule for a month.
Do you think this is a good idea?
If it is a good idea, can you tell me how to start the no contact rule? Perhaps tell him that we should take a break?

admin

March 22, 2015 at 4:44 pm

So glad that you got this to work for you!

No, I don’t think its a good idea to apply NC if you are in a relationship. Relationships are about trust, communication, etc and NC kinda kills the communication aspect.
Anonymous

March 30, 2015 at 5:14 am

You are a genius! Seriously!
We had the long conversation we needed to have. You were right, communication is key.
You know what? your article really opened my mind about the possibility of breaking up. I just never wanted to see that as a possibility. After long days of deep thinking, then after many hours of talking to him I realized I don’t want this guy. It was me who did the breaking up, not him.
I am free now and as happy as I haven’t been in a while.
Really Chris, Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
admin

March 31, 2015 at 10:15 pm

Super glad to hear this!

Thank you Anonymous and glad you worked things out.

kittykat

March 7, 2015 at 4:44 pm

Hi chris,

my boyfriend mentioned that he wants to break up with me, but since we are doing long distance(only for the moment) and will only see each other on september, he said he would delay it since he wants to do it properly(in person). Our relationship has been really fun for both of us and we really connect with each other. But the problem is his fear of commitment and he feels that our relationship is too overwhelming for him as he never had any serious relationship and our relationship is the longest relationship he ever had. He also thinks that our relationship is distracting him from his study(we’re both still in college).

We really care about each other and I truly believe that we have some sorts of rare mental connection. Is there anything that I could do? It is confusing me too that he is willing to wait until September. Is there anything that I could do? Perhaps some insights on how to get our relationship back on track?

Thank you.

admin

March 8, 2015 at 2:43 pm

I would just recommmend to stick to the basics.
Kittykat

March 17, 2015 at 8:56 am

Hi chris, thank you for your reply 🙂
Can you explain what do you mean by sticking to the basics?
Thanks again !

Megan

March 4, 2015 at 7:13 am

Hi chris,
Me & my bf have been together for 2 years. When we first got together he was immediately in love & eager to marry me. We had a short breakup but got back together and several mo later he said he never wanted to get married, but just recently he had changed his mind. Last week I mentioned marriage and he blew up on me and we didn’t speak for 4 days. We talked on the phone & he said He had been doing a lot of thinking & felt that if he was still unsure of marriage then he doesn’t know if he will ever be ready & doesn’t want to waste my time without being determined to marry me. So he said that maybe we should break up so I could find someone who does want that, but then said he didn’t know if that’s what he wanted bc a part of him thinks it’s for the best but another part of him knows that he will regret it bc he loves me so much. He couldn’t make a decision so I said we should take some time to think about things. I’m unsure of how to deal with this bc we aren’t broken up yet & i don’t know what’s going through his mind. Any advise would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

admin

March 7, 2015 at 4:32 pm

Well first things first, I would talk to him and determine where you are at in the relationship before trying any of the get your ex back tactics
Megan

March 7, 2015 at 8:43 pm

He said that he didn’t want to break up and that he wanted to work through his commitment issue so that he can get to the point of wanting to get married. Is this something I should wait for or let it go?

Kate

March 2, 2015 at 10:28 pm

Sometimes circumstances prevent you getting back with an ex no matter if you use the NC rule for months…thy can want to be with you emotionally but just can’t get passed things…what if your family was dysfunctional? Isn’t it easier to just move on …a lot of people don’t have the love in their soul or the patience

admin

March 3, 2015 at 9:41 pm

Very true…

Sometimes the odds are stacked against you.

However, whether or not to move on is completely up to you Kate.

Eleace

March 1, 2015 at 11:24 pm

Hi Chris,

I’ve been with my man for 9 years and lived together for the whole time until a month ago. We have 1 daughter who is 7 and another one on the way. He started cheating about a year ago, but it has just really started to get serious, so we thought it would be better for him to get his own place. I haven’t totally walked away yet and neither has he. We still talk and see each other, but I feel like I’m doing more of the communicating. When he spends too much time with this other girl, he gets tired of her and then wants to be with me and my daughter. I really don’t know what to do because I’m not ready to let go, but I’m also not his priority anymore. He doesn’t bring this girl around anybody in his life and doesn’t even give her a title. In fact he stills introduces me as his girl to people. He says he’s confused about who he wants to be with and wants his family back one week and then the next week he says he can’t let go of this girl and wants to be with her. She’s threatened to kill herself if he leaves her and even sent him pictures of her arms all cut up, and he still sees her knowing that this is crazy behavior. I didn’t want to give up so easily because we’ve been together for so long and now have a baby on the way. I just want him back here with us…his family. Should I just walk away and stop all communication? I’m afraid if I do this, he will completely walk away too and just be with that other girl if I stop showing him that I still want to be with him. Please help me!! I need some really good advice. Thank you.

admin

March 2, 2015 at 9:35 pm

Yes…

He is cheating on you.

That is enough to break up right there.

I am amazed you stayed together this long.
Eleace

March 2, 2015 at 9:56 pm

Chris did you miss the part that we have one child and another on the way, and he has not totally moved on. I just thought maybe there was a chance for us to get back together with our circumstances. I’m just so heart broken, I really don’t know what to do. I’ve read so many of your posts on here, even the one about trying to get him back while your pregnant. I thought you would have a little more insight and advice for my situation because it’s so complicated.
admin

March 3, 2015 at 9:39 pm

Yes, I seem to have missed that one haha. My bad sorry.

If you want the kind of response you are looking for why don’t you record a voicemail for me and I can answer it on the podcast?
Eleace

March 4, 2015 at 5:27 am

I would love to do that. How do I go about doing that? Where would I leave the voicemail?
admin

March 5, 2015 at 8:34 pm

Go to the contact page tab above and the instructions are there!

vin

February 23, 2015 at 4:59 pm

My boyfriend was confused since the beginning of relationship. He came to our first date with his friends (friends waiting in his car while we met in near by cafe). Second date, he asked me to come along with the same group of friends for a 3 day trip. I refused and told him I am looking for a relationship, not bunch of friends. Among them were 2 girls both always try to manipulate him someway or the other (he seems oblivious to it or may be he likes their attention). Anyway fast forward 3 months, his behavior changed, he always claims to be busy but when we meet he will be nice. I, on the other hand want more attention, caring and sharing. So we used to fight a lot. He broke up with me one day when i tried to discuss about his lack of genuine conversations and communication affecting my sanity.

2 months after that i message him to get back with him. Everything was not great but he also wanted me back. I felt like he didn’t mean it but i took it one day at a time. I am acting as if i am infatuated to him even after 7 months. I am emotional around him, he ticks me off very often (his insensitiveness towards me). This time after a few weeks, i tell him how scared i am to lose him again. He says he will not leave me. But his online activity increased, his so called female friends flirt with him in front of me (he doesn’t do anything about it). We fought about the same thing 1000 times yet he never maintains boundaries.

2 more months he is fed with my fights (I know but i wam trying to work things out and tell him what can be done from his side for it). His communiaction dwindled, no caring sharing stuff unless i insist and ask many times. He also has some foreign girls chatting up online (he says business clients but they are ALL female). He wants to break up with me but i want to tell him how it affected me and if he sees why i fight for him like that, we can still be a far better couple. He is determined but so am I. I know deep down he is full of shit (his female friends too) but i think i am stupid. What do i do?
Alexandra santillan

February 3, 2015 at 12:42 am

Hi Chris,

My boyfriend and I have had a long history together. We first were close friends to eventually becoming best friends (I was with someone else at those times) we had our few months of not talking once I was officially single. Every time we reunited or caught up with each other it’s as if we had never stopped talking. Last spring I transferred to the university he was attending at the time. (Not specifically for him but because it had a good program of what I wanted to major in) we start hanging out and next thing you know we finally make it official 4 years after knowing each other. Don’t they say it’s better when you date your best fiend? Anyway, as his graduation was approaching he got offered a job 13 hours away.. The pay was really great so he went for it and I supported him. Having been in a 5 year long distance relationship prior to dating him I was a pro at long distance so I knew exactly what to expect. 5 months into long distance my happiness begins to decline. He started talking about me not growing out of my comfort zone and not being involved enough in clubs like he was. He also brought up my debt once I graduate and what I would do if I don’t find a job right away. That gave me nothing but stress and worryness. We talked things through and I overcame them. A couple months pass and I begin to notice a decline in his communication. When I brought it up to him the first time he made an effort to change that. And here I am to this day clueless of where we stand. He ignored me for 5 days saying he had a lot of stress at work and wanted to wait until the work week was over to talk to me while I on the other hand was tearing apart inside. I mean why couldn’t he have sent me a simple text to let me know we would talk on the weekend?? I started getting use to not talking to hin even though I was dying inside. He then decided to call me and explain his working situation. He seems to keep putting off “the talk” about us..

(15 min later)
He just called me and told me he doesn’t feel the desire to put in the effort into a long distance relationship right now. He says he loves me to death and that when we are together things are great but it’s the distance that is making him feel this way. I don’t know if I should just let go or keep fighting to keep this going. Like I said when we are together things are perfect. Once we are apart it starts to decline.. The communixation from his end.
I have a year left of school and told him when things were great with us that I’d be willing to move where he is… I also go offered an internship over the summer where he lives. Is he not taking those things into consideration or what??

Help 🙁

admin

February 3, 2015 at 1:25 pm

He probably doesn’t think you are serious or if he does then he probably doesn’t want to be tied down.

Karleigh

January 28, 2015 at 8:12 pm

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years, a year ago he broke up with me out of the blue and then would talk to me once every week or so until we got back together after 2 months. sunday 1/25 out of no where his texts were short and after asking him what was wrong he said that he doesn’t feel the same. I called him and we talked but he said its that that he doesn’t love me or cant see a future with me. he feels like he is drifting apart and it has been a few weeks since he has felt that way he told me. he wouldn’t answer if we are broken up or still together but we are meeting today to talk about things at 430 AND I WILL DO ANYTHING TO KEEP THE REALTIONSHIP!!! WHAT DO I DO!!!???!!! PLEASE HELP!

admin

January 29, 2015 at 2:37 pm

So sorry I responded late.

Did you have the talk with him?

Emily

January 25, 2015 at 2:49 am

hey Chris,
my boyfriend of two year and I started having fight after fight about three months ago and I though we got past it but we haven’t and it’s been rocky ever since and my boyfriend doesn’t really express his feelings a lot. he’s been avoiding me and distant a lot. we’ve talked about breaking up but he said no but at the same time he says he doesn’t know what he wants. do you have any suggestions?
thanks

admin

January 26, 2015 at 3:36 pm

So, you two havent broken up yet…

Youve read this article correct?

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