Is Your Ex Boyfriend Playing Mind Games On You? Let's Find Out!

652 thoughts on “Let’s Find Out If Your Ex Boyfriend Is Playing Mind Games”

Gab

November 10, 2016 at 2:00 pm

Hi Amor,

So I broke the NC after 15 days, had a weak moment. I asked how we was and he said good, I then told him I ran into our old videos that made me laugh, he replied “yea we had great times, but those times are over.” I then told him you have mail here, he said to leave it on the porch or to keep it, he said he doesn’t have the “same” desire to see me. I asked if he was willing to see me in a few weeks I had a bday gift I wanted to give him. he then proceeded with that is unnecessary he doesn’t want to be friends, he appreciates the effort but I should let go. he’s moved to someone else. i didn’t reply after that. so then 2 days later he texts me asking if the mail is on the porch, he never cared for the mail unless i brought it up it’s been a month and a half, never asked for it. And then recently told me I could just have it, so he didn’t have to see me. So I told him it’s in the garbage with everything else that reminded or belonged to him, I told him he moved on so I will too. we are done, I asked thats what you want right? and he replied yes. Then the next day he liked my IG picture, why if he just basically told me he doesn’t want nothing to do with me, but in public he said we can be cordial. if he keeps doing stuff like this what should i do? what does he want?

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 14, 2016 at 5:01 pm

Hi Gab,

it looks like he just wants you to move on but he feels guilty for being rude to you so, he’s trying to be nice now..

aubree

November 10, 2016 at 4:16 am

My ex and I broke up about 2 and a half months ago. I caught him doing something he promised me he would stop doing (not cheating or anything). I confronted him then went to my mom’s the next day because i needed some space to think about things. He was apologetic at first but then when i returned he started freaking out on me and saying he was unhappy and i was always on his back about something, this was all abrupt to me because he had told me multiple times how thankful he is to have me, including the day right before all of this unraveled. Anyways, I end up moving out and hes refusing to see me or speak to me about anything, he also left the house every time I would come to get my stuff. Everytime I showed up there were a bunch of alcohol bottles and weed and once it even looked like he had a party because there were beer pong items. The only time he spoke to me during my entire moving out process was to ask me about bills, he would ignore me about everything else and completely showed no emotion. he didn’t express a whole lot of emotion throughout or relationship either, it was always sporadic. He acted like a complete ass to me after the break up even though it was his doing. so once I’m moved out i just stop all contact with him. well after about a month of no contact he contacts me one day by saying “hey” i said hey back and then he asked “whats up” well, when responded he ghosted me ans never texted back. I ended up sending him a message telling him basically that i don’t understand why hes treated me the way he has and that I was tired of him leaving me hanging. 2 days later he texts me and say es sorry about everything that he didn’t hate me and that I didn’t do anything to end our relationship. i waited about a week and texted him back asking why he’s been acting the way he has in which he responded “that’s just how I am. I’m an asshole and you’re the nicest person in the world. it’s not right.” i say “i don’t think that you’re an asshole i just don’t think that you care and I’m sorry that you feel that way.” he say ” I don’t care about a lot of things other than my kids, I do care about you though. That’s why I ended it. I’m not right for you.” I go on to tell him that I’m not trying to be nasty but that if he cared he wouldn’t intentionally do what hurts me. I told him that I wasn’t gonna drag it on and spill out a bug lecture as to how he should treat a person. I said that he is an adult and perfectly capable of making his own choices. I said he did make his choice and he feels how he feels and that there’s nothing i can do about that. I told him that i appreciated that he was finally honest with me and wished him well. to which he didn’t respond. well two days later he sent me a pic of his kids (that i helped him raise) in their costumes and said “this is my new number. figured you would appreciate these.” we talked a little about that and then he stopped responding of course. the next day I told him that i really appreciate the picture of the kids and that i miss and love them very much. I told him that I know he’s trying to be nice bc i made a big deal about missing them and got upset that he just pushed me away without being able to talk to them but that he didn’t have to do that bc it just made me feel upset and hurt, seeing them but not being able to be there. I told him maybe one day when I feel emotionally ready I can babysit or hep out with them every now and then. he responds with “we can be friends, i don’t dislike you.” That set me off emotionally bc I still have feelings for them of course, so i told him i couldn’t be his friend and that i acted the way I do bc he has continuously acted like our relationship didn’t mean anything to him. his response was “we were together for six months, jumped into living together way too fast, realized we weren’t good together and moved on so idk why your being like that especially saying you wanna watch the kids one day but you cant be my friend. so i think that’s a terrible idea. lol” I responded and told him that that message just proves my point, that our relationship had no value to him. I told him that i’m sorry i’m a person with feelings and that it meant something to me. that people don’t just live together, say they love each other, raise kids and then just write it off as a 6 month fling. I said this “decided we weren’t good together and moved on never happened for me bc i believed everything he told me up until the last day and bc it was so abrupt.” I haven’t heard anything from him since and it’s been about 2 weeks. I was honestly a very good girlfriend to him and did everything under the sun for him and his children, i asked him to stop lying to me about one thing and apparently he jsut wasn’t ready to change. Him and the mother of his children were together 5 years and broken up for about 5 months when we got together but they were on again off again for years and she cheated. I don’t think he was ready to commit the way he said he wanted to in all honesty or maybe i was just a rebound relationship. whatever the case is I honestly have no idea what his post-breakup actions mean or if I should try to be his friend. I’m lost.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 13, 2016 at 5:00 pm

Hi Aubree,

Actually he’s clearer now.. The relationship moved too fast and all the nagging or fights was too much for him because it’s just a 6 month relationship. You’re too invested in it. Whether you’re a rebound or not, he didn’t invest as much as you did. I’m not saying he didnt at all..

Just like what he said, for him, it’s just a 6 month relationship, but you’re being shaky because you’re acting like you have moved on by offering to baby sit someday and then went in blaming him like you havent moved on..
I am not taking sides ok.. I’m just saying what might be going in his mind.

Indecisive

November 8, 2016 at 10:46 pm

So long story short my ex and I broke up about 7 months ago. Seemed like we could work things out but he started dating someone shortly after the breakup and they’re still together. I haven’t talked to him in months. He started liking all of my Instagram posts out of the blue. Then yesterday he unfollowed me on Instagram (again, haven’t talked to him or anything in months). Never really paid much mind to it until family and friends started asking questions. They think he is trying to get my attention and to get me to message him. I’ve tried moving on but still love him and don’t want to get hurt again. Maybe his gf got mad he was liking all my pics made him unfollow me or is he trying to get me to message him? What do you think? Should I go on ignoring I would take him back but him having a gf puts a damper on me trying to get that to happen.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 12, 2016 at 10:15 am

Hi Indecisive,

Whatever the reason why he unfollowed you, at this long of no contact, if he really wants to talk to you, he will.

Lost In Love

November 7, 2016 at 2:33 am

So my guy has randomly popped in throughout No Contact. Unfortunately, I had to meet him last weekend to exchange things that he had left behind and he proceeded to tell me that he loves me and still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be in a relationship again nor does he want to be in each others’ lives. He did tell me that he was hooking up with other girls and that I should move on and start dating other guys. Prior to our meeting, he was sending me text messages saying that he wanted to see me and hope that I was having a good day, etc. Then last night, I received a text from him again sending me a link to a song that he heard of that made him think of me. After that message came another stating that he knows that I am ignoring him but he wanted to tell me how proud he was of me. His messages confuse me because I know just a week ago he was talking about being with other girls and flat out told me he doesn’t have any plans to get back together. I am stuck and confused. Any advice? I haven’t responded back to anything.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 7, 2016 at 6:52 pm

Hi losy in love,

it’s not looking good.. It looks kike he’s trying to friendzone you or be friends with benefits with you later on.. It’s either you start to move on or at least really make it like that’s what you’re doing before initiating contact

Brittany

October 26, 2016 at 1:32 pm

Me and my ex been broken up for about 3 months we were both guilty of lying and cheating I did cheat cus I’m young n I wanted to protect my heart since I knew in my head at least he was seeing other women.we were living together as well but anyways we broke up he still comes around from time to time n then I asked him what do u want to do cus I’m tired of this he said he want to get bk together but I haven’t seen him in 7 days since that conversation I called on Sunday n got no reply n I haven’t called since but he hasn’t called me either can u tell me whts going on ?

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 28, 2016 at 1:54 pm

Hi Brittany,

Looks like he had a change of heart.. Realized he’s not ready to go back together, and just decided to ghost you..

Janet

October 20, 2016 at 2:36 am

Okay so my ex broke up with me Monday, Oct 17th, 2016. He had spoken to a girl friend from high school at his gym that same morning and got her number (he didn’t tell me about it I figured it out). That same morning before he went to the gym we agreed on a clean slate and a start over. I was at school and work all day. I called him while I was at work after he dropped off some food for me. His tone was different something was wrong I could tell I knew what was coming next. He soad he wanted to break up and I freaked out at first. After I was done work I got to his house ge helped me take my stuff out and put it in my car. We talked he said I crossed the line to many times and he had talked to his sister about breaking up with me and thats how the conclusion was made. I said well i wanted to try if you wanna give up that is your choice. We said I love you to each other one last time and I left. He texted me today after going back to work in the oil patch. Wednesday, October 19th, 2016 he texted me saying “Hey, hope things are going okay just letting you know that you still have some clothes at the house I’ve gone to work already so I won’t be there but you can stop by and grab them. Also I think you still have my house key which I’m gonna need back”.
To me that feels like it is parmanently over and he has moved on to this girl he knew from high school and this is the first time they are speaking since 2011. My boyfriend is 26 and I am 20.

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 21, 2016 at 8:45 pm

hi Janet,

How long were you together? For me, you should move on from him.. it looks like you were just trying to patch things up when he suddenly moved to the other girl.. But if you really want to try, do no contact rule first

Vanessa

October 16, 2016 at 12:21 am

Hi,

I have an ex boyfriend who I’ve liked for the past 4.5 years and have been in love with for the last two. We dated two years ago for a few months, but broke up due to distance. Since then we have had a very on and off relationship. Never officially together but going through periods of talking and not talking. I am really confused because one day he’ll say that he has yet to meet anyone like me, thats he loves me and will suggest being more serious about each other and then the next day/week he’ll completely ignore me and my texts. Ive understood that distance is the main problem and that is not resolving anytime soon but Im not sure why about the constant back and forth. Ive tried NC but no matter how long that is we eventually talk again and everything just feels right. But once again, soon enough hell go 180 in feelings. I’m stuck. Its hard to move on, but Im always playing the guessing game and subsequently feeling hurt when he switches up on me. Help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 17, 2016 at 10:10 am

Hi Vanessa,

I think it’s because he likes talking to you too but as you said, the problem is still there.. if the distance is not solved, how would you sustain a relationship?

Briana

October 8, 2016 at 2:27 pm

It’s been 2 years since we’ve known each other & 15 months long distance. I broke up with him because we were moving and I can’t handle long distance he contacts same day to meet then that’s it. In these 15 months he would contact me & knowing I still have feelings hype me up & plan to meet then block? So I do NC again then he does it again says he miss me then few months we meet & everything was perfect we seemed like a couple again but he made mean remarks at times idk why so I confront then he blocked. Now it being October he recently contacted wanting to meet but I didn’t budge trying to move on but he insists so I said yes me again confronts bc I asked and he never said when and his busy then he blocks telling me to move on when I was until he texted me. Why does he do this ? I’m going NC again I feel like I am just his ego boost.

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 10, 2016 at 4:47 pm

Hi Briana,

looks like you’re right and the only solution is for you to really ignore him..

Kali

October 7, 2016 at 5:35 am

My ex boyfriend and i have been broken up for like a year now. Durinf that year we have argued fought etc. Anyway he was in a relationship with someome so i just didnt persue him. He started texting me again and i ignored him then i finally responded. When i did he immediately set up for us to meet etc. We had dinner had a few laughs then i wanted to know whats been happening exactly in his life ao i started drilling him and well as you would assume it didnt turn out well. He seemed uncomfy and was a bit angry but was hiding it. He left and we talked a lil but he kinda eased me off. In the past that was the turn off why he broke up with me. I didnt know what was happening and i guess because i wanted to move fast real quickly i got ahead of myself and couldnt control my emotions. We didnt talk for a few montha i didnt initiate contact n he didnt either. I finally text him amd he seemed into the convo etc. We spoke couple days after that,i text first and he was reaponding but it didnt seem as if he was in it emotionally. I linked him almost a week later asking if he was okay and he didnt respond but i know he was online via whatsapp. Y didnt he respond? Is it that he is trying to say he doesnt want to talk to me or im bothering him?

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 9, 2016 at 6:01 pm

Hi Kali,

I think you’re expecting too much from him.. you’te expecting him to still have feelings for you, but what of he only did that to catch up? yeah, he was curious but that doesnt mean he’s inlove

Lindsey Vega

October 6, 2016 at 1:42 am

My ex boyfriend and I were in a long distance relationship for 7 months when I realized he had been cheating on me and got one of the women he was cheating with pregnant. It’s not confirmed that it’s his child, but he did sleep with her and cheat. When I found out, I reacted very angrily and we started back and forth insulting each other and even threatening each other until we started blocking each other on social media, but never on our phones. He allows me to continue to text him just to instigate an argument and he always replies either plainly or with an insult. Yet, if I call him while he’s at work and his phone is off, he still calls me back. He won’t answer my texts now but he still hasn’t blocked my number, despite me asking him to. I came to where he’s at to see a family member and he’s not texting me back now, but he’s also ignoring the other woman. Does he want me to fight harder for him and make up for the way I hurt him? If so, my biggest question is when will the mind games end?

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 7, 2016 at 4:40 pm

Hi Lindsey,

I think both of you needs space from each other so that the emotional arguments will stop..

Mel

October 5, 2016 at 10:21 pm

My ex boyfriend broke up with me about three weeks ago, I started no contact and he spoke to me within a week and was contacting me on various types of social media, and asking to call etc. I spoke to him as I didn’t think I wanted to be with him at the time but now I think I do. He’s always the one who contacts me first and says he wants to speak on the phone but I keep saying I’m too busy, when I say I’m available to speak he had a job trial he was preparing for. He said he’s ‘thinking about me and thinking maybe he wants to see me but it’s probably a bad idea’. I don’t know whether to speak to him or start no contact again? Baring in mind i half heartedly broke up with him a couple of weeks before he did me

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 7, 2016 at 4:22 pm

Hi Mel,

I think you should restart the no contact rule, since he’s also busy then use this time to improve yourself.

sarah

October 4, 2016 at 5:42 pm

ny comments disapeared

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 6, 2016 at 6:10 pm

Hi Sarah,

sorry, they didn’t disappear. I just haven’t read them yet. Yes, you should start the no contact rule. I think he feels it’s not the right time. Both of you just got out from a relationship, and both relationships suffered from cheating which is not a good place to start a relationship with. So, I think you should do 45 days no contact so that you can have a clean slate and then take it slow from there.

sarah

October 4, 2016 at 1:49 pm

sorry last thing i forgot to add
he even said if i wasnt forbiden he would want to be with me and i said that i wiuld still want us friends i was trying to protect my heart snd stay guarded but losing contact hurts me because even tho we cant be with eachother i just miss talking to someone that i really like and knowing we both like eachother but not committing to eachother right now.. im not sure if he lost interest but even when he was pulling away and id initate contact he would say how hes into me and how if i wasnt forbidden we would be together going out more often instead of sneaking around.. also he recently gotten out of a long term relationship with a girl who he found has been cheating on him he was telling me hes down they were off during the time me and him were talking but the break up got official and that can be the reason to why he started fading and he even told me he doesnt feel like himself lately its weird i told him im going through stuff in my relationship with my fiance and that im always here for him our excitement and stuff all faded and he became distant last week he told me how hes crazy for me and ever since now hes faded away and we stopped talking.. should i start the NC rule i already started it yesturday

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 6, 2016 at 6:10 pm

Hi Sarah,

sorry, they didn’t disappear. I just haven’t read them yet. Yes, you should start the no contact rule. I think he feels it’s not the right time. Both of you just got out from a relationship, and both relationships suffered from cheating which is not a good place to start a relationship with. So, I think you should do 45 days no contact so that you can have a clean slate and then take it slow from there.

sarah

October 4, 2016 at 1:36 pm

hey,
so i met this guy we’ve been talking for a month we have so much chemistry and he told me that he really likes me, were so into eachother we hung out multilple times iv friend zoned him and he friendzoned me just because were affraid of committing to eachother because its forbidden since hes my fiance best friend..my fiance and i broke up either way its another story..
so the guy that i was seeing always initated contact and conversations we used to talk almost all day and that started fading.. iv asked him if hes mad and he said no and i felt him pulling away while everytime i would text first he would always be enthusiastic and text me back and we even hung out and he told me hes happy he met me and wants to continue what we have.. hes been hot and cold which is confusing.. he talks about other girls while i talk about my fiance were comfortsble enough i dont know if it is to make eachother jelous but i pretend that im cool with him talking about girls wven if a girl passes by he would twll me how shes gorgeous and i would agree to that.. so now he started to pull back abd fade himself even more because i would call him and complain about how my fisnce is treating me and he would tell me to end things and doesnt know what to say.. at first everything was exciting snd now im always initating contact even if i go a week without contacting him.. then i would message him and he would reply back fast with enthusiam then when i tell him what happend with my fiance he would ask what and i would tell him in one text he wouldnt reply back to that text… and then i would ask him to call me at times and he would right away we have long conversations on phone then i wiuld try to end conversation and he would also end conversations over phone most of the time… after my fiance and i break up i call the other guy because i have strong feelins for him and to tell him but he doesnt answer me call for the first time so i messagd him saying that he ws an amazing guy and to forget about me and everything and i dont get a response its been 2 days now and we still have eachothers on social media but no contact.. he wont even watch my snap stories.. we talked about how we have this connection and attraction even when he was pulling back and i would call him he wiuld tell me how he has love for me and doesnt wsnt to sound cheesy but he is really into me and likes me a lot and is sad how im forbidden and i told him i feel the same way.. we had a secreat friends with benefits i think its whats it called but its very taboo risky sneakig around and a lot of thrill and excitement and it all faded. i dont know what to do i miss him a lot.. i even told him that even if i wasnt forbidden i would like us to stay friends so that we dnt lose eachother even tho i like u a lot then he said same.
Billie

October 2, 2016 at 12:28 pm

I have a question my boyfriend my boyfriend and I have been broken up for about a week now he will not return any of my text messages and he sends my calls to voicemail the relationship was fine we were both madly in love with each other and we even got matching tattoos we both expressed how we wanted to be in each other’s life long-term but because of my current situation I thought it would be fair to make sure this was something he wanted to deal with I’m going through a divorce and I have a lot going on and so does he but I wanted to make sure that my baggage wasn’t too much for him so I gave him the option of breaking it off he got really mad and was absolutely devastated that I even gave break up as an option he said that if two people really love each other and want to be in a long-term relationship breaking up is an option he expressed that whatever I was going through he was wanting to go through it with me after not hearing from him via text or calls for a whole day the following day I asked him was this a break up and he text me back saying yes it was over that was three days ago He has expressed before that he does play chess and during regular conversation he expresses how he manipulates different situations for his personal gain… Just want to know if I crossed his mind? does he think of me? and does he think of me as much as I think of him?… The relationship was great up until about 4 days ago now we’re no longer in a relationship

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 5, 2016 at 9:24 am

Hi Billie,

I think he’s being emotional right now.. let him be..give him space.. if you keep messaging him, you’re just feeding his emotions right now

nicola

September 30, 2016 at 6:43 pm

My ex and I have broken up for 5 weeks now. First four weeks I contacted him and he spoke back to me and there was a lot of “maybe one day” “who knows what our future holds” “I will regret loosing you” from him! So many mixed signals just to make himself feel better. I know that he love(d) me and he does care about my well being but he thinks it’s best if we’re not together. It’s out with my control. I gave up and now doing no contact just over a week. He messages me “I’ve just send you £100 for that tv we halved in for” then another text saying “don’t send it back I just think it’s unfair me watching a tv you paid half of” this tv was for the spare room of our future home. What does this mean? I never replied as I’m sticking to my no contact.

Help!?

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 3, 2016 at 12:46 pm

Hi Nicola,

maybe he’s feeling guilty or it’s his way of trying to know why you’re ignoring him.. That’s good that you didn’t reply

Tasha Jefferson

September 29, 2016 at 9:45 am

Hi ex boyfriend recovery team , me and my ex were together for three years and we have two kids together he broke up with me this summer because of our arguments and I found out two weeks after we broke up he was dating this girl and he moved out a month later it’s been three months since we broke up he always call me first ,he still tell me he love me and that he thinks about Me while with her and we still are intimate sometimes I want him back but he says he scared I will hurt him again so he told me maybe in the future we can get back together what should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 30, 2016 at 10:09 pm

Hi Tasha,

Did you sleep with him? If yes, stop it.. Basically what’s he’s saying is, he still sees the old you.. Do you want to try the no contact rule? You should check this one because you have a child.
Get Your Boyfriend Back If You Have A Child Together

Melissa

September 26, 2016 at 11:14 am

My ex-boyfriend and I broke up about 2 months ago, after the break up I didn’t contact him, except to arrange collection on his things from my apartment. I decided to fulfill my dream and go travelling to Asia once we had broken up as I’d compromised not going because of the relationship.
The night before I left, he turned up to collect his remaining belongings and told me he still loved me, we were relaxed, chatted, cuddled and kissed – but he said we have to be apart while I’m away to make it easier on both of us which I agreed and we said goodbye.
Since I’ve been away, he’s texted me a few times to find out what I’ve been up to on travels etc, but stops texting mid conversation and I wont hear from him for a week.
This has upset and makes me think he’s playing mind games. I love him and want to get back together eventually and not sure I’m strong enough to completely ignore him with the NC rule.
He text me yesterday and I have not yet replied – should I follow through with the no contact rule?

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 26, 2016 at 1:31 pm

Hi Melissa,

well, he misses you so, he’s trying to be friendly and maybe to friendzone you.. Yeah, I think you should do the no contact rule.

Jessica

September 22, 2016 at 6:47 pm

Me and my ex boyfriend split up about 4 months ago. He turned up at my house on Tuesday night at around 10pm, he said he wanted a “chat” he said he had made a mistake and he missed me. I had only just got over him and I had blocked him on all social media and blocked his number. He ended up staying the night as I think he had a drink and was over the limit. he stayed in my bed. But nothing happened other that cuddling and kissing him. He left for work in the morning and now I don’t know where I stand. I’m back to square one. All my feelings are back and I don’t know what to do. I text him to ask if he regretted it and he said no but he hasn’t said anything else. Help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 23, 2016 at 3:38 pm

Hi Jessica,

give it time.. give it a week. Let’s see if he texts again.

Megan

September 18, 2016 at 6:53 pm

Hi, I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday, we have not been getting along and fighting a lot so I felt I had no choice but to end things, but I’m still very much in love with him. we were very close, he even told me he wanted to have kids, we were very serious. So today I saw him flirting with a girl, this girl I saw him flirting with another time I broke up with him and I told him I didn’t like her and now he’s doing this again, it hurts so much, why is he doing it? Why does he want to hurt me? when we fight he acts like he doesn’t care and tells me to do what i want I’m tired of hearing you talk and it makes me feel so bad, it hurts so much, I just don’t know what to do. Please tell me what is happening X

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 20, 2016 at 5:20 pm

HI Megan,

either he’s vengeful or he’s just using her to make himself feel good and since you’re broken up, the least he would care about, is hurting you..

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652 thoughts on “Let’s Find Out If Your Ex Boyfriend Is Playing Mind Games”