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Alaa
May 21, 2019 at 1:10 pm
UPDATE
Actually right after I posted those 2 comments in a few hours he texted me
I didnt send anything after the goodnight nessage but he texted me saying he is still busy but he has missed me and wanted to check on me
I texted him hours later though because didn’t want to text him right away I feel its wrong idk
And he replued right away and again I replied in hours
Then again told him goodnight
But what are the recommended steps to do now in order not to push him away further?
Alaa
May 20, 2019 at 2:14 pm
Sorry I forgot to mention it’s been just a month since he asked me out
I wanted to prove him that I love him but he is not cooperating because I feel I’m getting rejected
But I am confused and can’t know if he isn’t responding due to what’s been happening in his life..
So I can’t know if he loves me or not
Alaa
May 20, 2019 at 2:10 pm
Hey Chris! Hope you are doing well!
So there is this new guy I met, I was walking in a comic con with my sisters and he suddenly came to me to ask for me number, he said I was beautiful and wanted to know more about me
So we talked and got to know more about each other, he said he never believed in love from first sight but he thinks he believes in it now
Apparently he lives like 3 hours far away from where I live, and he confessed to me his feelings and asked me to go out with him
he came all the way from there “took bus as transportation” twice, they were really nice days..
Then my sisters told me they don’t trust him but I kind of did cause if he wasn’t serious he wouldn’t have come all the way from there just to see me) and I told him about it
he got upset and said that he loved me but I broke his heart, I didn’t know what I did so I asked him and he said it’s because my sisters are controlling me, but i did not take their advice!
and he said in this case he knows we won’t even last for a month
well since that day things have got a bit complicated, he doesn’t talk to me as he used to, it’s been more than a week now, but I tried to be patient and said maybe he is still hurt (I dunno)
but whenever I confessed my love or I send him love memes related or love comics, he doesn’t respond and responds to something else
and one night he said he said he was planning a better future for his “future wife”… he didn’t refer to me, before he used to talk about the future with me and always refer to me, it broke my heart
Then something in his life happened, he got rejected and can’t travel to America, so he was really upset and told me not to send anything, I didn’t.
one day passed then he messaged me, but he used to reply back after like 2 to 3 hours.. I understand what he’s going through so I just let it go
but nowadays he doesn’t talk like at all, and he goes out without telling me or anything, then I told him I am missing him but I understand what he is going through, then he said he is super busy and they are transferring into another house and he is searching for a job and a good college to continue his studies there and all, I wished him luck and told him goodnight, he said good night
and it’s been 2 days he hasn’t initiated a chat or even asked about me or anything
I dunno if what Im doing is wrong or right, maybe I should support him? or do I continue not to message him until he does?
Tyla
March 5, 2019 at 10:16 pm
Hi, Chris
My boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me a little over a week ago. We had a big little fight and he decided that he was done.
A week prior to that we had an argument too, where I had asked him if he would rather break up with me and have us go our separate ways. His response to that was confusing to me at that point. All he said was that he knows he would regret breaking up with me, should he do so. This was not the answer I expected, and what I was hearing was that he actually wanted to breakup with me but he felt unsure. I then told him that it’s okay and that we should go our separate ways, he agreed. The next morning I received a text message from him, asking me to reconsider things and give our relationship another chance. Without any hesitation, I gave it another chance. I was not going to just let it go anyway, I guess I just needed to see where his heart and head was at.
Anyway, to come back to the official breakup – already being familiar with EBR, I knew that I had to begin the NC period (I really, really, really want him back. I love him and we used to be great together). However, as you can imagine, at this point I was extremely emotional as I realized that his mind was made up and that he was serious about the breakup. I attempted to begin the NC, but he for some reason would not stop texting me to make sure if I was okay and ask if we could be friends. I would not respond of course, but he then started reaching out to my mother to ask her if I’m okay as I’m not responding to his texts. I then decided to break NC, I told him that I was okay and I asked him to stop texting my mother (I did not want my mom to give him too much information about me during this time). He reluctantly agreed and we ironed things out between us, in other words we ended things on a positive note. He mentioned that the decision wasn’t easy but that we both had to bite the bullet. Having him be so calm and cool about the breakup made me so afraid because it just got more and more real for me. I was about to end the conversation and go back into NC when he begged me to stay online a little longer and chat further. He had bought me a ring as a gift about a week before the breakup but due to certain circumstances we haven’t seen each other for a while and he never got to give me the ring. He then told me that he would want to see me for a last time and give me the ring as he still felt that I deserved it. I kindly declined the offer, logged offline and continued NC.
I’m sorry – I know this is an extremely long essay , but I really need you to stay with me . Please.
Exactly a week after I went into the NC period he had reached out just as I was thinking of him and how much I miss him. I didn’t respond, of course. He double texted me “Hey ” – “How are you?” It was so difficult not to respond but I am determined to continue working on getting him back.
What I would like to know is, what to do IF he decides that he wants to give us another chance and asks me to get back together with him during the NC period. Do I discontinue NC, or do I continue ignoring his texts? I really don’t want to mess things up.
Thanks for reading.
Chris Seiter
March 5, 2019 at 10:49 pm
HI Tyla…so I can see there is a lot going on. I wrote an eBook (The No Contact Rule Book – 245 pages) that dives deep into all the questions you ask regarding the what ifs. NC is highly adaptable and there are a lot of factors one should take into account before deciding to discontinue. I encourage you to take a look at that resource as its a complicated topic.
Foolish
March 1, 2019 at 8:03 pm
Foolish again, my ex has been actively looking at my snapchats (within an hour of posting or less) and he’s not even my friend on there, meaning he has to type out my username and see if I upload. I broke NC after a week by sending him a message on his phone saying to stop viewing my stories since it won’t let me block him anymore. And he hasn’t replied. Why he active on my snap even screenshooting selfies of myself or posts about going to Vegas soon and not even acknowledging I’m telling him to stop? He went from blowing up my phone, even at work to completely stopping except for actively looking on Snapchat.
Chris Seiter
March 1, 2019 at 10:44 pm
Hey there…Probably best to get back to NC. Are you following the blueprint I have in my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”? It will help you stay focused in accomplishing your NC goals.
Foolish
February 27, 2019 at 2:50 am
My sister saw my now ex of 6 months at her work place with his ex of 4 months before me and her son. As soon as he saw her he ran out the store. This is a touchy subject for me because she came into my workplace and physically assaulted me over him when we were just friends at the time & 2 months after they broke up. Because of her crazy behavior he cut off all communication with her. Or so I thought. I didn’t even let him explain himself and sent a “I can’t believe you text” then blocked all numbers & social media before he can reply. He somehow had people text on his behalf saying he was with this person at this time (blocked those numbers immediately), added me on Snapchat, called me on blocked number numerous times, and called my work twice within the first 2 days of me dumping him (my work gave excuses for me.) But yesterday and today, nothing not viewing social media posts or calling. Im just confused and hurt by his actions when I never gave him any reason for him to doubt me, he knows my past and he “swore” he would never pull what my ex did but he did & he just wants to make me happy as I make him happy… I’m just wondering if I was a joke to him and why bother harassing me when he clearly still wants her by going back to her. I want answers but I refuse to unblock him right now especially if he is lying saying he was never there. What can I do?
Elaina
February 21, 2019 at 7:10 pm
Following up on your response, do you feel it’s over then? I still haven’t heard anything, we haven’t broken up. But are you saying I should accept it’s over and move on?
Chris Seiter
February 21, 2019 at 10:31 pm
No….patience, however uncomfortable it may feel, is what needs to be exercised to get a better handle on what is going on.
Elaina
February 21, 2019 at 12:56 am
Dear Chris…I got into nasty fight with the bf over messaging two weeks ago. We had been fighting quite a bit over the past couple of months during a rough transitional period. Well I saw him the night after this fight and we seemed to be okay, though he had not responded to my apologies so it didn’t quite seem resolved. Things seemed okay the rest of the week and he texted me happy valentine’s day and I visited him at his work to give his gift and card. But I had a bad feeling and a mutual friend (his best and really only friend) confirmed my fears and indirectly telling me my bf didn’t want to be with me anymore but didn’t want to tell me directly. I sent the bf a message (this was four days ago) apologizing again and clearly stating how I feel and why I had been letting myself blow up at him. He said “we will talk tomorrow” which would have been Sunday but it never happened. I gave him space and waited, knowing he was working his usual 12+ hour shifts at his restaurant and not getting a day off until today. Well Tuesday morning after no message I sent a more in-depth message about everything and reaffirming I do not want to lose him and how much he means to me, that I was letting myself get upset over him not talking much to me or expressing as much physical affection as I had hoped for but things were fine when I wasn’t pushing for that affection or communication. I told him I knew I had been insensitive (a lot of the strain was caused by his grief losing his father and uncle last year and it was devastating for him and his family) We had been living together all last year and when he got a condo he was going to have me move there with him but because of how strained things had been I suggested living apart for a bit to work on ourselves but still in a relationship and he seemed to have no problem with this at all. But I know now that this likely did cause a huge problem and his friend had suggested as such and we had been living apart since around Christmas and he was upset about me not being around. But I was making things worse by harassing him and getting upset over trivial things. Well I know he read the long message I sent on Tuesday and still have heard nothing. I found out his godmother passed away today and messaged his mother with my condolences; because she often visits him, she expressed confusion why I haven’t been around and I was narrowly able to avoid the subject but I’m afraid she’s going to hound him about it because she is very nosy. Regardless of her involvement, I am stressing hard over the bf’s lack of response and not knowing where we stand. This time feels worse than the other fights I instigated. I’m very ashamed of how things have turned out. I just can’t stand the thought of losing him. Should I keep waiting for him to reply to me? If so, how long?
Chris Seiter
February 21, 2019 at 3:21 am
I know Elaina…fights are the worst part about our relationships….how quickly things can go south. A lot has unfolded. But the past is past, so now its time to focus on a positive future which includes your healing and recovery. Take a look at my 485 page ebook (EBR PRO) to help you going forward!
Sophie
February 17, 2019 at 8:04 pm
Hi Chris,
My ex broke up with me a week ago and left me broken-hearted. The worst is that we are co-workers, so we can’t avoid seeing each other. I know what you think…We were together for 6 month and we never had an argument. His parents divorced when he was a little boy so he could not see a “good pattern” who a good marriage works. We didn’t spend too much time together which must be surprising, outside of work we met like twice a week, we spent most of the time at my place. Everything was good, before the week of the break-up we spent the whole week together expect for 1 night whe he met his auntie (she is just 4 or 5 years older than he). I met his father (not for the first time), he introduced me to his half-brother. I really liked both of them and it was mutual. We were planning to have a wellness weekend, and not just that, he told me he wants me to join him during their traditional family holiday by the lake, which I really wanted to, I even booked those days.The day after I met his brother and father I introduced him to one of my friends (they couldn’t meet earlier as she was abroad). He told her the four of us could go on a double date. I was very happy as you can imagine. I was about to meet his mother, I have talked with her on the phone a couple of times, but finally it was time to meet. I have already introduced him to my family, they really got on well. After that happiness came the week of the break-up. I was most surprised as there were no signals at all. He has had many issues recently, but I was always there for him. He told me he still loves me, but not the same way he felt earlier. I asked him why he didn’t tell me he had had doubts, he told me he didn’t want to as he thought he can get through those without telling me. This is the break-up in a nutshell. This was last Friday. He left me clueless, hopeless, broken-hearted. I really wanted answers, so we met the following Tuesday. I didn’t have all the answers I wanted. We met at my place. At the beginning we are sitting on the couch staring at each other. He looked worse than I did. He broke silence by saying he misses me so much, he even told me he loves me and has feelings for me. I told him this is mutual, I feel the same way. I had so many questions to ask. By the end of the list I asked him how he feels about his decision, whether he feels it was the right thing to do. He told me he doesn’t know and that he needs time to figure it out. I also asked him whether this decision is final or is it just a break. He told me the same that he needs time. This was his second relationship, the one before ours was 10 years ago. He is 27 I am 25. What do you think? Will we ever get back together? Will the no contact rule help us?
lele
February 16, 2019 at 4:16 pm
hi chris
me and my boyfriend
broke up two weeks ago
and i am going to start NC on him
ind i was wondering if i unfriend him on social media
and hide my stories from him or
i can use it as a weapon to make him miss me
Chris Seiter
February 17, 2019 at 1:10 am
Hi Lele!
I know its still hurts, even after 2 week. NC can be the right medicine. I favor keeping the social media lines of communication open. Instead of thinking of weaponizing it, think in term of leaving little breadcrumbs. Pick up my comprehensive eBook, “PRO” to learn more about all of this and more
Anna
February 12, 2019 at 5:42 am
Hi chris
I wrote on your site here somewhere before but anyways… i been really sad and depressed what happened with my EX. Its been about 17 days i broke the NC because i been extremely sad so i contacted my ex on a text one big long text for explaination. Same route with first break up few years ago but hes even more rude this time. Im not in shock what he has to say… hes acting really weird because we fought and i told him we would talk if we fought which we didnt and this is only our second fight. Hes making a big deal out of it and i dont know anymore. We are long distance now as i moved away few months ago for work. I used to live same city with him. He was planning to move to where im at in the future… anyways hes saying that i cant talk normal while we fight but again like i said its only 2nd fight. I learned maybe i should not care and let things go one ear out another. Im not even sad anymore, more like “what the f*…… Do you have any suggestion what i should do? I dont think there is getting back together after this anymore… i dont know. Im lost…
Chris Seiter
February 13, 2019 at 12:49 am
Hi Anna!
Hang in there Anna….you are going to get thru this. Check out my website and eBooks for all kinds of ideas on how you can heal and participate in meaningful recovery activities to lift yourself up. My Program gets into a lot of the things that can help you with your ex recovery efforts.
Megan
February 12, 2019 at 2:12 am
Hi Chris
My boyfriend and I dated for three years. We had an awesome relationship but took it slow as we both have kids etc. We didn’t have tedious fights. Had a great sex life. Treated each other with trust and respect. Had fun and had plans for the future. And before it happened I truly felt we were secure completely that we had a future and I thought he did too. I was at peace. However twice in that three years when things had gotten rough he backed away took space and broke up with me only to come back. He did the same this time over basically nothing. But broke up with me told me I wasn’t the one and he had to focus on him etc. He has been struggling financially and with many life changes the last year and I have supported him entirely. He said he needed time but he never really talked with me on an emotional level just gave me cliche reasons. This was a few weeks ago and we kept in contact. Had lunch. And texted and I sent emotional texts telling him how I felt but he sent nothing emotional back. But said he wanted to have me in his life. Five days ago he came to do a favour me he had promised previously and I told him I accept but don’t understand his decision to break up. He acted very strong and stubborn in his decision as stubbornness is his character and he knows it. And now I’m here reading about the no contact rule. He doesn’t know we are in a no contact phase but I feel that we are. I really don’t understand why we broke up. Am fearful of the what if’s. I feel as if he is forgetting me because we have no contact. We never established no contact. Do I keep at it? I am almost breaking
Chris Seiter
February 13, 2019 at 12:58 am
Hi Megan!
I do think NC is a pragmatic way forward. Tap into my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” to get up to speed on this whole post break up period. Its 485 pages of lots and lots of information that I think you will click with!
Sofia
February 11, 2019 at 8:22 am
I have tried the NC rule and it always works. After about a year of a very difficult relationship my boyfriend decided to move to another country. At that point we have a mature conversation. He needs to focus on his professional career. This relationship does not let him focus. And blah blah. I decided to act mature and accept all he had to say. I also blocked him on all social media (yes i regret now). In few days it will be 60 days no contact. Thats the longest ever. Although i check his social media and he has been very quiet and some friends say he is going through some rough times still proffesionally.
But because this is not the first time he leaves i dont wanna be the one to contact. But after 60 days. I am not sure what is the right thing to do.
Chris Seiter
February 11, 2019 at 11:42 pm
Hi Sofia!
If you are following along with my Program, I do call for you to reach out at the end of the NC period. There is a certain method I teach in how that’s done via text…sort of a slow, steady, value building approach which I get into in much more detail in my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”!
Andrea
February 4, 2019 at 12:53 pm
Hi, Chris!
I started the no contact rule almost a month after the breakup. And now I haven’t spoken to him or seen him for over a month, and during no contact I hoped he would contact me, but he hasn’t. So I have not contacted him yet even if I am «finished» with no contact, because I don’t know what to say to him. He actually has still some things at my place that he has forgotten, and I tought about trying to contact him first with telling him that I found some of his stuff. Is that something I should do? Or totally not? I am just really confused right now. I have read your articles about texting an ex after no contact, but I still don’t don’t know how to contact him without looking desperate.
Chris Seiter
February 4, 2019 at 5:18 pm
Hi Andrea!
My Program calls for you to reach out in a certain way…using a certain strategy. Its rather involved and too lengthy to cover here. I wrote an epic long eBook (485 pages) that get into all of this, but just know its a process. Think little steps. Its starts with texting of certain type once a sufficient period of NC has elapsed.
Zoe
January 23, 2019 at 10:43 am
Hi Chris, you’re articles have made me grasp new hope.
Me and my ex boyfriend were together for almost 5 years.
Shortly before christmas eve he broke up with me, he said he wouldn’t feel the same anymore.
Unfortunately I just started using the no contact rule on the 18th
Our anniversary should have been on the 14th of February.
I really want to contact him before that asbit would have been an important date, but 30 days would be after the 14th.
Also it is probably important to mention that we were in a long distance relationship for the past few months, as he moved to crete for university and I stayed in Athens because of my work.
Since I started the no contact rule following has happened.
He talk to a mutual friend of ours, told her, he was feeling sad because I didn’t reply to his messages, he felt jealous when he found out I went to meet a colleague of mine, also did he admit of being jealous and tryibg to figure out who I was talking to late at night.
To her and also to my bestfriend he stated, he doesn’t rule it out ever being together again, that there is a small chance. But that there is a lot of weight on the word small.
Deep down I believe 30 days woukd be the best, as the 66 days of breaking a habit aren’t over yet, it just saddens me a bit to let the anniversary date, which doubles as valetines day obviously, pass by.
There are a lot of other things that have happened, like him talking a lot to some online acquaintances, them being females, with similar interests to mine. But your articles made me realise about the rebound aspect. That he is most likely trying to fill the gap with something.
Also what is worth mentioning, while he broke up with me, he wanted to stay friends, foolishly I agreed, we even met up 3 times after it.
Thing is, during these 3 times, we had sex. And after everytime, he admitted he wasn’t able to get it out of his head and he was confused about everything (his words). After the second meet up he even said he can imagine way better being back together again, he even gave me a goodbye kiss then. Later on he said to that, he still doesn’t know if he wants to be together again, and he his reasoning fir his actions as for the kiss, he just felt like doing it.
After we met 3 times, I had a talk with him, asking if he doesnt wanna give us another chance, I said a lot of things, all calm and collected.
He said that he found what I said very mature, but still declined, as he wanted me to grow as my own person.
So, that’s my situation. First I justwanted to talk about contacting him before the 14th. But then I just kept going. I am sorry for the long text, but it felt nice letting it all out.
Chris Seiter
January 23, 2019 at 11:53 pm
Hi Zoe..I am glad you are enjoying all the articles. Lots of content here and lots of resources, ebooks, videos, and podcasts aimed at helping you, along with my exclusive Private Facebook Support Group. I have 2200 members now! It is healthy to get things out. Keep a journal and share you feelings and aspirations.
Elaina
January 23, 2019 at 12:09 am
Hello Chris!
So this might be too soon to tell what’s exactly happening, but I would very much appreciate your advice/feedback!
My boyfriend of a year and a half broke up with me via text 3 days ago. Everything was going great between us, however, I got caught in a very unpleasant situation, that involved him and a good female friend of mine getting into a verbal fight in front of me. The situation was only worse, because alcohol was involved, and we were at a bar that was loud, so I didn’t hear how the fight started. He states that my friend started the fight, and that she said some pretty nasty things to him, however, he also said some nasty things to her in response to her words. Long story short, I didn’t know how to handle the situation, so I did absolutely nothing. Later on that night me and the bf did make up and everything was good, however, I made the mistake of calling my friend the following morning while he was in the other room to get an explanation of what happened on her end, while also explaining how the whole situation got me upset. Once I ended the telephone conversation and walked back into the room my bf was in, he was very upset, and told me he feels that I do not believe him, and that I’m not taking him seriously. I tried to squash it but I now believe it seemed as though I was dismissing his feelings. Once I arrived home alone, two hours later I get a text from him that he feels that I wasn’t there for him at a time he needed me, and how he now sees where he stands. To sum it up, he said, “we shouldn’t continue our relationship, and go back to being friends, thank you for all the positive memories, and that he will no longer be a problem in my life or my friend’s life.” Of course, at first I was sending texts pleading him not to end it, if we could talk for a few minutes, and how sorry I was. He then texted me, “maybe later if I have the energy.” I called him hours later just once, and he forward my call. He texted right after he can’t talk tonight, so I didn’t respond. The following morning, I texted that “I’m very apologetic for what had happened, I’m sorry that I hurt him in this way, how I know I seem desperate, and I don’t want to push or pressure him to talk to me, that I want to respect what he wants, and if ending this is really what he wants, then I promise to back off, and that I just didn’t want to end our relationship via text, and again, I hope we can talk later.” Later on that afternoon he texted me, “I won’t be free later, I have something important to me that I have to do. I understand you want to talk. I’m not ready to.”
I did not respond to this text, as I just wanted to respect his decision, and not make things any worse. It’s only been two days since this last text. My thing is, I’m not sure if we broke up, or if he broke up with me in the heat of the moment. Things were going actually really good between us, and we both said we loved each other for the first time just a week before all this mess happened. I know now, I said what I needed to say, and that’s all I can do at this point. What should I do as far as no contact? If he does contact me, should I still apply the no contact?
Chris Seiter
January 24, 2019 at 12:07 am
Hi Elaina!
So things sound a bit uncertain as to what the status is. Just give him some space and take things slow if he reaches out. If he doesn’t after several more days, then a NC period may be in order.
Diana
January 19, 2019 at 3:48 pm
Hi Chris,
I dated a guy for a short while, but it was very intense, he was super into me and wanted to have a relationship, talked about future etc. Then he ghosted me, it was so sudden I sent him a couple of texts “is everything ok?” and “just tell me whats going on, Im worried” until I realised he just ghosted me (10 days ago).
Do u think the NC rule will work here? I know he had feelings for me, but we dont live in the same city and I have absolutely no way to know what actually happened here.
Thanks!
Chris Seiter
January 19, 2019 at 4:11 pm
I do think Diana that you should apply No Contact. It is most rude for a guy to ghost you in this manner.
Ash
December 13, 2018 at 7:15 pm
I was talking to this guy ( dating ) we were talking about getting serious but we both had exes that the relationship ended badly. I decided to leave a bad situation and start something new with him. His ex continued to call him and he would answer just to tell her to go fck herself. After he got that call from her he acted sort of distant towards me. I didn’t like it so I told him that it’s best we don’t see eachother anymore and wish him and his ex the best..and he replied that I don’t even know what happened and what was said. That he told her he’s with me now and to stop calling…but if that’s what I want then fine… but right after I changed my mind and made my way to his place to apologize for saying that to him.. no response. I called and texted him the whole next day.. no response. We have a common friend and he told her that he’s turned off by how I acted without knowing and how I’m acting soo soon in the “ relationship “. And that he was gonna call me when he settles in and everyone left his house but I went and assumed and broke it off with him and that he’s upset I doubted him . As soon as I found out he spoke to her on the phone and In the time frame of him speaking to her right after he went from calling and texting me constantly and that day and the next day sort of being distant I assumed he changed his back on me and tried breaking it off first …. idk what to do he’s been ignoring me completely after I sent that awful text message… how can I get him back…. will the no contact rule work??
Chris Seiter
December 14, 2018 at 12:41 am
Hi Ash…NC can be a very effective approach, but you need to fully understand how to put it to work in your life. Pick up one of my eBooks as that is the fastest way and most organized way to get up to speed or explore my site and the readings and videos!
Naoko
December 8, 2018 at 5:33 pm
I want to ask : I broken up with my ex 12days ,we are without NC ruled ,what if during 30days we both no NC ?it’s mean we finished ?
Chris Seiter
December 9, 2018 at 2:18 am
Hi Naoko….at the end of the NC period, you will want to reach out in a certain which I discuss in my Program!
Natalie
December 7, 2018 at 2:30 pm
Hello there. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years answer have a child. I went straight NC and he’s only reached put to organise when hes having our son and to collect his things. I was considering the 21 day NC as I haven’t had anything from his side either. Do you think that’s best?
Chris Seiter
December 8, 2018 at 3:42 am
Hi Natalie…Yes, I am thinking 17-21 days given the years together. Probably not longer. Hopefully some time and space will cause him to reflect on things and come to appreciate more your value and what he has at stake. Pick up my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” as i think it will really help you a lot!