1,959 thoughts on “Why Is My Ex Boyfriend Always Ignoring Me?”

1. 

   Akira

   January 18, 2017 at 3:14 pm

   i hurted my bf a number of times by useless quarelling with him, useless arguing with him, being angry with him for silly small reasons, supescting him, irritating him.. for this behaviour of mine, he had forgiven me many times bt atlast he couldnot hold up things anymore, atlst he broke up with me.. now i feel jst alone without him.. i m very sorry for my mistake.. i realized it now that i hv done a big stupid mistake.. i confessed my mistake to him & to god too.. my bf said to me that he has forgiven me bt dont want to get again in a love relationship with me.. now we r jst friends.. we talk very less.. i feel very regret for doing this to him & i wanna correct my mistake.. i still love him very much & want him back again in my life as my lover.. so wat should i do now?? will he again come back in my life?? will god forgive me for this mistake?? pls hlp me.. pls pls lord!

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 19, 2017 at 5:39 pm

   Hi Akira,

   of course God will forgive you.. are you going to do the no contact rule?

2. 

   Keshika

   January 17, 2017 at 7:43 am

   2 weeks ago my boyfriend called me and said he is breaking up with me. I was shocked. Then after 2 hrs he called me back and we talked for 10 mins. Everything seemed perfect i though we were back. Then the next i tried calling him. He didn’t reply. At night o tried again and we talk for lengthy hrs. On the third day everything was okay again. Then on the forth day, everything went wrong again he seemed angry. Few days ago i went to his work place ( hes the owner) to meet him. He did came to meet me and he left, he didn’t seemed happy. Usually he keeps on smiling when i go there. I don’t know whats wrong. All i want to know is why he left me! Help!!

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 17, 2017 at 6:59 pm

   Hi Keshika,

   it’s like he’s ghosting you.. check this one:
   What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Ghosted You

3. 

   Samantha

   January 11, 2017 at 12:06 pm

   Hi, so I’m a little confused ATM. So me and my ex bf split at the end of November, I applied the no contact as much as I could as we work together. But once we resumed proper contact things were friendly and flirty between us, always taking a few days between conversation. We arranged to meet for a catch up lunch on Nye as I had went traveling over Xmas and I know his family well. We had met for a quick coffee date prior to this. We met for lunch, everything was like when we first started dating, both of laughing and joking and I was watching his body language and it all pointed to him being interested in me. Well the lunch went a little too well and we hung out all day. We ended up back at his house and I was waiting on the call from my friends to leave for the city as he lived close by. Well we continued to laugh and joke and have a few beers, completely losing track of time and it ended up going to the countdown. I still love him and care about him so we gave each other a kiss at midnight as you do. That ended up kicking off him to start a make out session, and against my better judgement we ended up sleeping together. He drove me home the next day and kissed me before getting out of the car. He initiated contact after that but then on Wed 4th he went radio silent and I haven’t heard from him. Iv reached out to him twice in that time and no response.

   Help! How do I go from here to get contact back underway?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 11, 2017 at 2:08 pm

   Hi Samantha,

   I think you need the follow on this one:
   EBR 018: I Hooked Up With My Ex… Now What?

4. 

   Linq

   January 4, 2017 at 8:28 pm

   Hello,
   My ex and I broke up a while ago but we kept in touch and called everyday.. then he found someone else and told me he was moving on.
   I have to admit I’ve lost my mind a bit and became quite needy and annoying at a point..
   Then I went for no contact rule for 30 days.
   I texted him a cheerful text after that saying I was doing something that I knew he liked, and telling him he would habe love it. Then I just said I hoped everything was well. I kept the ton happy and positive.
   He answered the day after, saying he was sorry he had to ignore me (when actually I was ignoring him?) And that it hurt him a lot to do so but he had to as it was the only way for me to move on..
   I will try to take things slowly with him and rebuild the connection I know we still have.
   Do you think I still have a chance?
   I am ready to take time to do to this slowly

   Thank you..

   Lina

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 6, 2017 at 7:49 pm

   Hi Lina,

   so, when did you actually break up? Honestly it looks like he moved on to the new girl.. and was your first text exactly like that? as in you told him you did something that he likes? because it sounds like you’re trying to please him.. So, of course he would avoid you to protect his new relationship..

5. 

   Nat

   January 4, 2017 at 12:34 am

   We broke up and I didn’t text him much. I didn’t write him a long essay. I just sent him a message 30 days after no contact explaining why this was the best for us. And how I believed certain things weren’t handled in the right way and I wished him the best of luck and I hoped he was doing okay. He completely ignored my message. Crazy thing is I didn’t do anything had to him. He lied to me and I caught him. Our breakup was entirely his fault for not being honest and he knows that. I waited another 30 days and I decided to send him an angry text and he responded. He responded angrily but the fact that he responded to that suprised me! It’s been 8 months since we exchange messy heated texts and I thought I’d contact him to see how he is doing. I did it in the form of reminding him of the place that we meet and I hoped all was well with him. He did not respond… why? shouldn’t he be over this already?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 5, 2017 at 8:52 pm

   Hi Natalie,

   In your first post you saif he’s married, that’s the reason why he’s not answering anymore..move on from him..

6. 

   Anon

   January 1, 2017 at 12:35 pm

   My ex broke up with me and i contacted him after no contact we texted and we started to get a rapport building and he initiated a topic but then completely aired me when I replied why is that and what do I do

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   January 1, 2017 at 7:41 pm

   Hi Anon,

   How many days were you texting?

7. 

   Advice

   December 27, 2016 at 8:49 am

   My ex broke up with me over a year ago, a couple of months after we were involved in a bad crash (he was driving), and which was followed by him finding out his sisters cancer had come back. We tried to stay friends but he then stood me up for a concert he promised he would come to. I got pretty angry and upset about it and he then he just stopped talking to me and has completely ignored me for over a year. He watches all my Snapchats but won’t like any of my pics on Insta. I unfriended him on FB as I got sick of seeing all the nice things he wrote on other people’s walls. It hurt.
   On Christmas night I sent him a merry Christmas text after a year of this silence. I thought I’d give it one last shot. He actually responded briefly a few hours later. I was delighted to hear from him and so responded to his comment but he has just gone back to ignoring me. He’s still liking posts on Insta but my text just sits in WhatsApp completely ignored. Do I just give up? Is he totally disinterested and I’m just a nothing? Not even friend worthy? The reply just a courtesy?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 29, 2016 at 11:32 am

   Hi,

   try the advice here:
   check this:
   Getting Him Back After A Year (Or More) Apart

8. 

   Bee

   December 26, 2016 at 3:13 am

   My ex broke up with me over a year ago, a couple of months after we were involved in a bad crash (he was driving), and which was followed by him finding out his sisters cancer had come back. We tried to stay friends but he then stood me up for a concert he promised he would come to. I got pretty angry and upset about it and he then he just stopped talking to me and has completely ignored me for over a year. He watches all my Snapchats but won’t like any of my pics on Insta. I unfriended him on FB as I got sick of seeing all the nice things he wrote on other people’s walls. It hurt.
   On Christmas night I sent him a merry Christmas text after a year of this silence. I thought I’d give it one last shot. He actually responded briefly a few hours later. I was delighted to hear from him and so responded to his comment but he has just gone back to ignoring me. He’s still liking posts on Insta but my text just sits in WhatsApp completely ignored. Do I just give up? Is he totally disinterested and I’m just a nothing? Not even friend worthy? The reply just a courtesy?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 28, 2016 at 5:02 pm

   Hi Bee,

   check this:
   Getting Him Back After A Year (Or More) Apart

9. 

   Gwen

   December 24, 2016 at 8:27 am

   Hi Amor,

   I eventually talked with him about it… And it was weird, he was calmed and not angry he has told me he is alright with me but wants everything to flow naturally not to be cute and romantic with me instantaneously. However I’m still worried because he seems like waiting for me to screw it all again, like he is acting this way because he now thinks I don’t trust and is afraid of me being jealous again… Or like ig he wanted to act this way so he doesn’t have to break with me again until naturally we just end up being friends or it all is solved naturally and we go back to being the way we have been these past months (I’m afraid he frienzones me now… When I finally got him back…) It’s like if all the atractiveness I’ve been trying to build and all the things I’ve been trying these months to be ok with him (that have worked) had vanished 🙁 he isn’t chasing me anymore… I don’t know if just waiting for everything to be normal or if there’s something else I can do…

10. 

    Confused

    December 21, 2016 at 3:39 pm

    My ex added me back on social media after blocking me on some and unfriending me on others (but it was not a full block out). I have completed NC and tried contacting but he wouldn’t reply. So why did he add me but wouldn’t respond to me and what should I do about it?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 24, 2016 at 9:00 am

   Hi Confused,

   when did you finish nc and sent a text? when did he add you back?

11. 

    Jemma

    December 18, 2016 at 11:02 pm

    Hello

    I was started dating this guy for about 2 months we weren’t official but he told me her really liked me and wanted a relationship eventually and wasn’t just looking for a casual thing. He had split up with his girlfriend who he had a son with a few months before we started seeing each other but when we spoke about this he assured me that he was ready to move on and this was his past now. Everything was great and we spent a lot of time together and went on dates regular i met his family briefly. But he gradually started to not text me for hours of the day and just not seem interested in talking to me unless we was meeting that day this started to annoy me and after a few days of him doing this i told him that i didn’t think we should continue things he replied with why and i said because i feel that you are not that interested anymore to which he replied of course i am i am just going through a stressful time but if thats how you feel then i apologise. So i said ok don’t worry maybe wrong timing he then didn’t reply and unfriended me on Facebook which i thought was weird. i messaged him asking if he had fell out with me and then another asking him why he was ignoring me and he hasn’t replied. and this was like a week ago?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 22, 2016 at 9:20 am

   Hi Jemma,

   hmm..seems like he’s not telling the truth.. are you going to do the no contact rule?

12. 

    JadaMarie

    December 17, 2016 at 3:22 pm

    . My ex and I dated 17 years ago and decided recently to try again. I will admit I messed up. We just broke up Monday here is what happened. I was added to a singles group in July by a family member but never participated. I got a post from the group and decided to open it because I was bored. The post was sexy men post your pics and women comment the first thing comes to mind. About seven scrolls down I see a picture of my boyfriend. I immediately text him and ask “baby are you participating in a singles group and in parentheses I state I understand that you are not married. He responded “what” I replied asking was there some confusion on what I was asking? He then responded I’m wondering why you’re asking me that if you understand I’m not married. I’m immediately infuriated and hurt because I believe that it was inappropriate for him to be posting in a singles group. I then started he should have told me about the anything that goes clause he responded what and then never mind. I then tell he never answered my original question. Then he responded If I’m asking him then that means I already know right? I asked was that his final answer and said yes then I asked if he would be ok if I were doing the same? His response hurt my feelings he said I could do what ever I want to. This translated to me that he didn’t care about me or the relationship. So here is where I believe I made him angry. I stated “wow tell me how you really feel then I stated I didn’t need his permission and how were we building and he’s leaving his options open and then I asked if he was participating in the group because he’s an attention whore? His next reply had me in tears . He replied please leave me alone. I text forever? He didn’t respond so I called he didn’t answer and I called back and that’s when I realized he blocked me then I later realized he blocked me on facebook. So I emailed and he didn’t respond. I called from different numbers he didn’t pickup. He blocked those numbers too. I found a way to get messages to him bypassing my number being blocked. I apologize for speaking to him that way because he warned me once before about talking to him that way but because I was hurt and angry I didn’t realize that I had done it until it was too late. I always left a note on his car window asking if we could talk he saw me. He has called me crazy in the past so I’m not sure if I have lost him forever this time. I love him and I don’t want to live my life without him. I can but I don’t want to. Can you help or have I lost him forever? I wanted to order your products but I was not sure if I had a chance.

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 21, 2016 at 12:27 am

   HI Jade,

   Even if you bought our products, there’s no guarantee that you would get him back. And just to make it a little more clearer, if he called you crazy in the past, that means you make your world revolve around him which is not a healthy way to be in a relationship. And in your other comment, I think he said you could whatever you want because he felt he was being accused. Though for me, I would probably ask him in the same words, but not in the same way. I would do it in person to set the tone. But I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying the probable reason why he reacted that way. Stop chasing him. It’s not attractive. Aside from moving on, the better option is to do the no contact rule and really, genuinely change. Build a new routine and have your own life apart from him. I think you should do 45 days and if you’re still blocked after that, set a limit on until when you would observe if he unblocks you before moving on.

13. 

    Sas

    December 14, 2016 at 7:59 pm

    Need a little advice I’m doing no contact .but I have to e-mail him regarding our daughter. Im nice polite an straight to the point say what needs to be said .then leave it.but every time hrs later he will email me saying I can’t leave him alone . iv change my phone number so I don’t text him silly stuff .but the last time he did this he gave me he’s number over email an said he wanted mine .just so we could keep in touch about out child .he dumped me .he told me not to text or ring him anymore .and doesn’t ever want to get back with me again. So I put my own feelings away an give him space an not mentioned anything about us .but always ends up texting that I can’t leave him alone .and he always seems angry with me even if I’m really nice .im bettring myself I look an feel good .i have so many comments on fb from friends .i just don’t get him .im lost with out him but living my life .i just dont get him. An he doesn’t contact me at all .after 6 years together he ignores me .im so confused what does he want from me

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 15, 2016 at 9:56 am

   Hi Sas,

   hmm.. Attention probably..he doesn’t want to talk but he wants you to keep chasing.. Why did he broke up with you?

14. 

    Mia M

    December 10, 2016 at 8:53 am

    Hello,
    Me and my ex broke up for 1 year, last week he texted me and we chatted little bit (it was awkward actually). Then after we finished the conversation he sent a message saying that he would like to chat more in future. I didn’t reply to his message, so the next day he sent another msg saying “thanks for yesterday, I wish we could chat more as normal”, I replied “nope thanks to you, I want to but I don’t like this texting app”. Actually we’re using an app to chat and I don’t like it, so I wanted him to suggest another like Whatsapp or Instagram or anything else but, he read my msg and he didn’t reply! I
    I don’t understand what’s going on with him, maybe i’m acting awkward or selfish? or maybe my reply wasn’t nice?
    Any advice please? This man is great, we had relationship for 3 years, we’ve been on tough and beautiful days together, and now since he texted me again, I hoped things between us will get fixed but it seems that it will never be fixed.

    Amor, please help me!
    Thank you!

1. 

   Mia M

   December 10, 2016 at 8:56 am

   P.S…
   It’s been days now and he never texted me back 🙁
   I’m really worried.

2. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 12, 2016 at 11:34 pm

   Hi Mia M,

   Correct me if I’m wrong. You were broken up for a year, and then he suddenly messages you? Honestly, the last message sounded off. It could be read like, you didn’t like to talk to him.

15. 

    Ignored & confused

    December 6, 2016 at 3:32 pm

    A guy I was seeing (not dating exclusively) started ignoring me after a small argument over text. He has never ever ignored my messages before (every). Right after the argument I apologised the same day and called, but he read the messages and ignored me. I attempted to apologise about 3 times that week and he ignored me. I left it for two weeks and send a message to see how he was. He read the messages within minutes and ignored me. It has now been 16 days since that last message. I am in N/C but really want his opinion of me to be change as I think I was pressuring him to enter a relationship. Is 30 days or 45 days even enough time? Is there a higher likely hood that he may stop ignoring me after 90 days? I am very confused why he doesn’t just block me, but instead read my messages and doesn’t answer. The argument we had was about commitment.

1. 

   Ignored & confused

   December 17, 2016 at 10:30 am

   One last question… Can you or Chris give some insight into why a man would read messages via WhatsApp and purposely allow the blue ticks to show so I can see that he has read them. if a man wants a woman to stop contacting him, why would he either not read the message at all so the blue ticks do not show or just block the woman on WhatsApp or from contacting him through text period. As a woman if I didn’t want to speak to someone, I wouldn’t read the message or just block them.

   Is this him trying to give me a clear message that, he is ignoring me? Or is he trying to hurt me or is he doing this pit of spite?

2. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 20, 2016 at 3:05 pm

   those reasons can be, but it can also be that he’s just really curious on what your text is..

3. 

   Ignored & confused

   December 12, 2016 at 1:38 pm

   Does this mean I am better off doing a longer no contact period (90 days) and ‘moving on without moving’. or do you think I should ‘test’ whether he will respond after 45days? I have been active doing no contact so far (22 days today) working out and posting on social media as well as dating other men

4. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 14, 2016 at 7:28 pm

   Try 45 days first… if he doesn’t reply, then continue the count to 90 days

5. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 10, 2016 at 11:56 am

   Hi Ignored and Confused,

   if he doesn’t want to commit, then that means he has to see that you’ve moved on first. That you’ve got the message and chose to move on. If he’s sure that you’ve done that, and had your own life, there’s a chance he will talk again.

16. 

    Sally

    December 1, 2016 at 12:55 am

    After 1 year, we broke up about a month ago. The reason was he didn’t see me in his future. We had contact during the “getting each other’s stuff from each other’s houses” phase. No contact since. I did contact him about a project that I was doing with his son. I sent a, straight forward, email that included instructions on how to finish that project. Today, 2 days later, I received an email saying thank you for the instructions, that he had a few other things of mine, and what was a good day for him to drop off some of my stuff that was still at his place. I do want him back. What do I do?

1. 

   Sally

   December 1, 2016 at 3:54 pm

   There was no contact for 3 weeks. I did the email because it was necessary. It was dry, nothing emotional. All business, but not rude. His responding email was a good email, as your site says. I’ll continue the no contact rule. But then what?

2. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 2, 2016 at 12:51 am

   Did you actively improve yourself? And how much? Were you also active in posting in social media? Those are very important because if you didn’t do it, you have to restart count. He has to think you’re moving on. After the nc, you can initiate contact to build rapport slowly but you also have to continue the routine you started during nc. You have to continually improve yourself while rebuilding rapport.

3. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   December 1, 2016 at 10:58 am

   Hi Sally,

   do you want to try the no contact rule?

17. 

    Hemamalini

    November 29, 2016 at 10:56 am

    Hi.. my boyfriend and I had broke up with 2 years … Now it’s has been six month after our break up… I texted him back .. he just repled me with his massive text always… It hurts me every time… Some times he never responds.. some times blocks me… I really don’t know what to do with but I hope u can help me to figure it out … It’s has been six months but just now read your article and NC rule . Are they any chances that can bring him back to me. Pls help me…!!!

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   November 29, 2016 at 9:17 pm

   Hemamalini,

   why did you break up? Was his massive text negative?

18. 

    Helen

    November 22, 2016 at 2:50 am

    Hi my ex broke up with me a week ago. Because he already had rough times about his fam and works but i always be like a kid and fight for small problems until he reached the limit of patient then finally decided to break up. That night he was angry and told me he already thought about this and sure about his decision. Few days later it was my birthday and he texted me a small HBD message. Then my bad, i texted him like a stubborn person who is still needy and ask if we can’t fix it ? The answer was “no”
    That night i wrote him a long message said how bad and guilty i felt and i was really ready to change cause i had read our old conversation and saw how bad i was and i never wanna lose him and still be here waiting for him. He just read that night but no reply. And until now i haven’t text him again because i was reading about the NC rules and wanna try.
    He seemed to be sure about his answer the night we broke. I was trying hard to beg him to give me the really last chance (because i did have the last chance before and he could see my efforts about trying to be better but maybe it wasn’t enough)
    We are about 100 km away from each other and every time we had few days off. We go to see each other. He is 10 years older than me. And we had been 9 months together. I know it seems short but I swear to god he is my best one whom i love the most. Now i’m so suffered and still crying every single day. He used to tell me he will not change his mind cause in his life, whenever he does, it makes he feels regret.

    What should I do now ? Should I text him a small messgae sometimes or just be quiet for 30 days refers to the NC ? :'(
    Cause I want him back so bad
    Thanks

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   November 24, 2016 at 2:43 pm

   Hi Helen,

   change first.. Use nc to start havubg your own life.. Insteas of begging repeatedly, focus in starting a new routine during nc that you will continue after nc

19. 

    Pamela

    November 20, 2016 at 6:04 am

    Hello, okay so this will be a little hard to explain. And I know that I might be in the wrong for a lot of things that I’ve done after reading this article, but I REALLY want and need some advice about this guy that I dated for about a month and a half. I met this guy in college, we both want to be in the medical field so I met him in a class that I was taking to become a CNA. It was in the summer time of this year, around April. It was kind of weird how we started talking, because I didn’t know if he actually liked me or not I couldn’t tell. Until we ate lunch together one day during our clinical that we had, and he said that he would take me riding on his motorcycle because I said that I’ve always wanted to ride one. During that time he also told me stories about how his ex treated him very badly and how she abused him. It might’ve been just a way for me to feel sorry for him now that I think back at it, but he didn’t seem like a liar or a dishonest person to begin with. He was a very caring type of person. Even though he told me that I “needed a burger” lol when we had to check each others blood pressure which I thought was mean, but he later apologized for saying that so I told him it was okay. Well after we hung out a few times, takin me riding on his bike, and then to the rose garden in the park, I started to think maybe he did like me. I don’t know why I was so blind to this, maybe I thought he was too cute for me or something. But I noticed how whenever he dropped me off back at my house he was smiling sooooo much. I knew he liked me for sure. So I finally told him that he gave me butterflies when we were texting. He was really happy and told me he had a crush on me and that I made him blush a lot. He also told me that he never felt the way he felt for me with any other girl, not even his ex who he had loved but he had to leave her because of how bad she was. So we continued talking, and then about after 2 weeks he asked me to be his girlfriend. He was 25 and I was also 25. So I said yes of course because he truly gave me butterflies all the time and the way he would look at me, was so indescribable. I ended up sleeping with him after we got together, which I shouldn’t have but I liked him too much and it was hard to resist. We were in the lust phase. He was an amazing boyfriend. Showed me off to his friends, wanted me to meet his family, and he wanted to always be with me. He was always asking to see me all the time. I remember even giving him a kiss on the cheek, and he said “How can you have that kind of effect on me from just one kiss on the cheek?”. It wasn’t long before we told each other that we loved each other. I felt so compelled to say it, the feelings i had for him felt so strong. I knew he felt the same, he showed it in his actions. And he always had the biggest smile when we were together and he laughs a lot when he’s with me. He just made me melt how he smiled and looked at me. He told me the same. He even told me that he thought I was “the one”. Everything was going really well, and we were both really happy with each other, but then I started noticing that he would start to say or do small things I didn’t like. I guess you can say I was nitpicking at things which I regret, but he started feeling like he couldn’t be himself with me. And that made me feel bad 🙁 I started to feel as though he wasn’t too happy because of that. It was a very small issue that we could’ve over come, but I ended up saying to him “I’m not gonna be with you if I’m making you unhappy” and so he took that as I was breaking up with him, and he started saying things like I’ll find the right person whose gonna fit me like a glove and all that. I was SUPER confused as he took this as a breakup which is not what I wanted, but was too afraid to say that it’s not what I meant. It was a misleading text and he took it wrong. I also said that I must’ve not meant much to him if he’s willing to let go so easily, and he said ” if you think this is gonna be easy for me you are truly mistaken”. So idk are communication was messy and that’s where it all began. Because we didn’t truly communicate properly. So after we broke up he still kept texting me surprisingly and even asked me to go see a movie with him. He also invited me over to his house, which was weird because it seemed like he wanted sex which I turned down. He would still flirt with me trough text and even say he was gonna come to my job because he needed jeans. ( I work at a retail store). But overall usually after a breakup your ex stops contacting you, but he seemed like he still wanted me back. He even said he wanted to stay friends with me because he truly liked me. I had said no at first, but then he said he prayed that I changed my mind because he truly liked me. Okay so here is where the weird part begins. After he invited me over for I guess sex or whatever it was maybe he just wanted to see me, I felt used. I even said to him, “is this the only reason you wanted me over” he said no we can do something else. So we played a video game, which is what we did when we were together. So when I left, he told me to text him when I got home. I did, and then I told him I wanted to tell him when I was at his house that I wanted us to get back together. I also wanted to tell him at his house our breakup was a mistake but I couldn’t get the nerve to do it I was too nervous what his reaction would be. He ended up telling me that it was a bad idea inviting me over so late and everything came out wrong. And that he didn’t feel the same about us getting back together. I couldn’t have been more confused in my life. I though that’s what he was trying to do?? Maybe he got mad because I didn’t sleep with him or something? I don’t know. I got SO upset because he rejected me, so I ended up sending him a super long text saying that I felt like he was using me and that he should just stay out of my life. And that he should just let me go because it hurts too much to stay friends. I also told him not to respond to it, and he didn’t. After that I had apologized but he never responded and I waited about a month and then told him happy 4th of July. So then he also told my happy birthday on July 5th. He was always very nice when we would text but I remember sending texts about missing him and also telling him I didn’t want the breakup and stuff but I would never get a response. Why was he so quick to keep texting me after the breakup? But after I sent that long text about staying out of my life he completely shuts down? He ignored a lot of my texts about saying I didn’t want the breakup and stuff. I know that he’s a busy person and he works as a CNA now which he has to work long hours like nurses do. And he hardly gets days off, but I feel as though him saying he’s busy is probably just an excuse. So this was a few months ago, we broke up June 9th, and he’ll text me if I initiate convo but he hardly reaches out if I don’t text him. There was one day that he texted me out of the blue saying “playin got kick ball today :p” which I found weird, but I told myself if he was trying to let me go he wouldn’t text me at all. And actually our texts are always positive if we do text. So I’m confused. Why wouldn’t he want to get back together after knowing that I didn’t want the breakup in the first place? He put so much effort when we were together but now he’s so different. Okay so another mistake I made is sleeping with him still. I know I shouldn’t but I still love him. And when we get together for that, he laughs and smiles like how he did when we were together. Is he afraid of commitment? We had sex about 2 weeks ago and he held me when we were in bed. He was embarrassed because his areas wouldn’t stay “erect” so now I haven’t gotten a text from him. The last text I got was ” am a bit embarrassed tbh” because I said “thank you for the other night”. Okay and so I ended up saying it happens it’s not a big deal. And then I said I don’t really care about it tbh it’s just sex. Then I ended up sending him a song that I said makes me think of him. I haven’t gotten a text since he said he was embarrassed so I don’t know what to think about this guy. He doesn’t make sense to me at all, and if someone’s could help me I would be SO happy. Not even my mom or my dad could figure him out and I can’t either. I do know that having sex with him is not the answer but it’s hard because I still love him. Even though we only dated for a month and a half my feelings for him were so very strong and I felt as though I had known him my whole life I just never met him. We had a strong connection. I want him back more than anything, but I need to know if maybe he’s afraid of commitment and just doesn’t tell me, or he just doesn’t love me anymore, or maybe just too busy with his job? I even see on his Facebook that he hardly has time to see his friends too. I asked him not too long ago if I could see him and hang out with him and he said yes we could. He also texted me one day to say he changed his schedule to day shift cause he was tired of never having the night off, and I didn’t even text him first that day. I took it as a hint that he did it to have more time for me maybe, and well his friends too. He doesn’t have a problem talking or hanging out with me, but if I say I miss him or talk about feelings he won’t respond. But when we talk about other things he’s always positive. But if he is afraid of commitment, why is he? I didn’t want to breakup remember? So I don’t know, any feedback that you have please help me! I’ve been beating myself trying to figure him out. He never talks about the day we broke up and never ever says anything about it at all. Thank you!!!

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   November 22, 2016 at 6:35 pm

   Hi Pamela,

   when he said he cant be himself with you, that says a lot. You may feel a strong connection with him but if he us telling the truth that means he doesn’t think you’re a good match for him but it doesn’t mean he’s not having fun with you, he is. He just can’t be himself with you. He tried friendzoning you after the breakup, maybe for company or to keep doing the fun stuff without the hassle of being in a relationship with you. But right now, you’re even worse than being friendzoned, you’re friends with benefits. You have to stop sleeping with him and you have to stop chasing him by asking for him back..

   Maybe the other reason too is he really is busy, so he doesnt have time for a committed relationship. So, stop giving him the benefits of being in a commited relationship.. Do you want to try the no contact rule?

20. 

    Toria

    November 18, 2016 at 9:29 pm

    Have been dating my bf nw is over a years suddenly he asked 4 a break…..Months after he came 2 apologized & we moved on …..Last two weeks he started complaining dat I nag too much & he brokeup agn,all my pleading&crying were futile,Since den I started d NC rule until dis night dat I messaged him but he read it &didn’t reply.

    plz help me I want my bf back!

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   November 21, 2016 at 2:32 pm

   Hi Toria,

   The no contact period is for you to heal and improve. It’s not just for the sake of staying silent and giving space. Especially if he broke up with you because you’re a nag. 2 weeks of nc is not enough and you need to change first, improve and have your own life..