18 Proven Signs That My Ex Wants Me Back (Based On Research)

1,520 thoughts on “Signs My Ex Wants Me Back”

charlyn

February 19, 2015 at 10:54 pm

Still love my ex but i dont know if he still love me too, i told him that i wont give up on us but he keep on telling me that its to late, what should i do now?we have a long distance relationship before he go abroad he told me to wait for him its almost 1 & 1/2 year now since he left and and last december he finally tell to me that i should move on that there is no use of waiting for him because he doesnt love me anymore.what is the best thing to do? Any advice thanks

admin

February 20, 2015 at 11:36 pm

You have been broken up for 1 and a half years?

Heidi

February 19, 2015 at 7:55 pm

Well just broke up with my boyfriend 2 weeks ago. We lived together and dated a year and 2 months. He is 52 and I am 42. We started out so perfect, mind blowing sex, so much in common, communicated, he really tried to do new things with me and go new places, I even got him eating Sushi for the first time in his life. His adult kids were shocked! He was freshly divorced though, and don’t think his heart was quite ready for someone like me, something so serious to happen. He went from being gaga for me to going back to the workaholic he once was and telling me he was not happy with me anymore, then he told me he did not love me anymore. Once he said that, I ended it and left. His kids did not want to blend a family with my son, his 16 yr old son said he was uncomfortable around my special needs son(he has brain damage and is autistic) and he spoils his son so I knew it was only a matter of time before things went really south with us anyway.
So I have been in my own place with my son for about 2 weeks. He calls or texts at least once a day, he has taken me to dinner twice, he asked me over 2 nights ago after work and had bought food for me to take home (fresh tamales he knows are my favorite) and had a glass of wine poured for me. HE calls and texts me…I do not initiate the contact. Any way, after he poured wine we sat on his couch (he bought a new couch, I told him I did not like the other one it was dirty and old) and he told me ” I don’t think either of us were happy but we really had something, and he had tears welling up in his eyes, he reached over and grabbed my hand. He did a big gulp and pulled himself together and I went home. The next night we went to sushi, he seemed distant and did not have much to talk about. He paid $2000 FOR ME TO GET INTO MY APARTMENT, HE BOUGHT MY FURNATURE AND SURPRISED ME WITH IT AND he gave me the SUV I drove while we were together because my BMW was wrecked in an accident. I am having trouble figuring out his motives? What does he want? Me back? why is he doing and saying these things?

admin

February 20, 2015 at 11:31 pm

He seems to be taking actions that are common among men who want women back…

Alice

February 16, 2015 at 11:49 pm

Hello,
Me & my ex boyfriend have been seeing and gone out with eachother for the last couple of years and everything was amazing, however he went to uni and cheated on me with a girl in his course. He told me straight away about this particular issue, although I gave him another chance he kept going back and forth between me and her. She knew he was going out with someone. But that never stopped her. Disgusting on both parts, however he came out of the first year of uni and wanted to make it up to me n apolise ..which I gave him another chance. But now he’s gone back to uni. He’s officially made her his gf but yet still to this day likes nasty photos referring to his ex (meaning me) what does this mean?

It’s been months I cut him off. I stopped talking to him. I blocked his number. Never replied to his texts. And he still makes digs like ‘SHES better than you’ under his and his gf photo. HELP please! Cxx

admin

February 17, 2015 at 12:41 pm

Maybe hes resentful that you aren’t struggling post breakup like he expected you to.
Alice

February 17, 2015 at 6:22 pm

But the thing is I did, for a whole year I used to cry and be upset with how he’d never reply to my texts or put in enough effort as he would when putting in effort at uni.
Now he’s with the girl he cheated on me with, I just thought that’s the last straw. All the pain n tears I couldn’t do, I even warned him myself if he done it again after numerous times, I’d cut him off which I have.

So if he’s made his own decision to be with her why still worry about writing nasty stuff and making digs at me? I cut him off last September so why is he still concerned over me? He has the girl which HE choice himself.

He made that decision, what do you think?
Also putting photos up together on social media writing ‘she’s better than you’ like what?!

Shelly

February 16, 2015 at 4:44 pm

Okay so can I get some advice on my situation? Everything felt perfect in our 5 month relationship until he talked to some friends of his. They told him he should be with someone his age (I’m 20 and he’s 25) because I’m still in college and not ready to settle down. This is something we talked about in the beginning of our relationship, however all of the suddenly it’s now a huge matter of importance. I started to cry and beg him to stay with me, but we ended up breaking up two days before Valentine’s day. At first I poured my heart out to him. He told me that once I finish college in two years we can be together and I told him that’s not what I want, etc. He seemed absolutely heartless, like he never loved me and acted with zero regard to my feelings.

However, now he keeps asking me to hang out. Part of his reason for breaking it off was that he supposedly believes that if we’re just friends, we’ll get to know each other better. I’ve stopped acting desperate and hopeless though, and now I’m trying to show him I don’t care. I considered trying out no contact, but instead I’ve been doing something along the lines of minimal contact. I never call, text, or initiate conversation with him. When he calls me or messages me, I usually respond with short, general remarks. I’m trying also to act less like a broken-hearted ex girlfriend and treat him just like how he asked: as someone I see only as a friend.

I told him I wasn’t going to hang out with him anytime soon though because I need time to get over him. He responded by saying “so you won’t hang out with me cause you like me? I like you, but I don’t get sad hanging out with you.” However, he keeps coming up with things for us to do such as go see a movie, go bowling, or go buy some pet fish for the new fish tank he just bought. Last night he asked what I was up to and I told him I was out with a friend. He responded with “that’s cool, kind of jealous, wish I was out with you.” My problem is that I don’t know what he’s trying to do or how I should react.

Is he really trying to be just friends? Is he trying to “keep the door open” so that if/when he changes his mind it will be easy for him to get back with me? Do you think if I keep not hanging out with him he’ll change his mind and try to get me back? At this point I don’t even know if I want to get back together with him or if I should. However, I don’t want to be playing games with him or getting manipulated into doing what he wants.

Just a few extra details about our break up: he told me a lot of things (none of which I’m taking to be 100% truthful) such as “I don’t want to be with anyone else” ” you’re the most compatible girl I’ve ever been with” And “you’re the only girl I need.” So if he really does mean these things, I feel like the issue was with our timing. He must have started doubting that we could last for the two years I have to focus on school for whatever reason. I have no idea how someone can go from acting completely in love with me to just dropping me though. It all hasn’t made sense to me and I’m very confused about his behavior during and after the break up. I’m trying to keep my distance enough so that I’m not going to be a little toy for him to use post-break up and so that he respects me and may realize that the break up was a mistake. Do you think this is an appropriate approach? Or should I start doing no contact? Also, we work together so in going to HAVE to see him there. However, when I do I just look at him like he’s a stranger essentially.

Thanks for this article and all your advice!
Prithika

February 16, 2015 at 3:04 pm

Hi Chris,
i’m from India. I’m your big fan !! I’m really heart broken right now. I need your help ;( I cheated on my boyfriend and i feel terrible about it.. i slept with my ex and didn tel abt this to my boyfriend since he’s a sensitive guy.. i was scared to tel him ;( my ex threated me and told everythin to my boyfriend… now he got so angry he called me names and slapped me.. i love him a lot !!! i dont kno why i slept with my ex.. i accepted my mistake n apologized.. My boyfriend cried and he broke up with me.. i begged for a chance but he’s so hurt… i seriously cant live without him ;( this all happened on my birthday that is feb 11 (worst bday ever) i need him.. i jus cudn believe that i did this to him.. i’m the worst person in the world.. please help me.. Is there any chances of getting him back..??? He’s sucha nice guy i cheated on him i feel sooo bad.. i jus wanna hurt myself .. He called me strday to shout at me, i kept apologizing.. he called me a bitch, slut etc.. i’m not that kinda person, i dont cheat i regret for wat i did.. please help me _/_ i need him back. Please reply..
Thank you.
Golrokh

February 15, 2015 at 12:46 pm

Hi dear Chris actually I and my ex boyfriend of 6 months have broken up about one month ago (sorry for my English),after breakup I did not contact him,he contacted me several times.once 3 days after break up to say how I am and I answered him “thanks, what about u?” After that,1 and a half week later he texted me on viber admiring my new pic and I thanked him after several hours, of course,on that time I haven’t been familiar with your website, as soon as I read about your famous NC I started it from the last text he sent, on 27 th Jan but again after 28 days passed of our break up he called me 9 in the morning 3 times but I didn’t answer, again after 4 hours I texted him telling I was busy at that moment,he texted me back telling me that he just had a bad dream and wanted to know that I am ok,(he seems very indifferent)I texted him thanks I am good with a smile,now I’m wondering that it was the right thing to do or not?! Actually I really want him back but I don’t know that my texting to him last time was right or wrong according to your NC rule, plz tell me Chris.it was 28 days after breaking up,and it was a short texting,
I don’t know what to do.should I start a new NC or I should assume it that it is over. ??? Plz help me,I don’t know if he call I should answer or not. ??i have to mention that we were in a very deep relationship with each other and during this time he several times mentioned that he deeply loves me more than anyone else in his life.

admin

February 16, 2015 at 11:36 pm

Start a new one right now.

Golrokh

February 15, 2015 at 12:18 pm

Hi dear Chris actually I and my ex boyfriend of 6 months have broken up about one month ago (sorry for my English),after breakup I did not contact him,he contacted me several times.once 3 days after break up to say how r u?and I answered him “thanks, what about u?” 1 and a half week later he texted me on viber admiring my new pic and I thanked him after several hours, of course up to there I haven’t been familiar with your website, as soon as I read about your famous NC I started it from the last text he sent, but again after 28 days passed of our break up he called me 9 in the morning 3 times but I didn’t answer, again after 4 hours I texted him telling I was busy at that moment,he texted me back telling me that he just had a bad dream and wanted to know that I am ok,I texted him thanks I am good with a smile,now I’m wondering that it was the right thing to do or not?! Actually I really want him back but I don’t know that my texting to him last time was right or wrong according to your NC rule, plz tell me Chris.it was 28 days after breaking up,and it was a short texting,
I don’t know what to do.should I start a new NC or I should assume it that it is over. ??? Plz help me,I don’t know if he call I should answer or not. ??i have to mention that we were in a deep relationship with each other
Luna

February 6, 2015 at 11:42 pm

Hi,

I came by your website by accident, but BOY am I glad I did. It has cleared some things for me, but I am still a bit confused about my “ex” and was hoping you had some advice for me?

I hooked up with a guy about 6 months ago – it was a drunk, random thing. Both of us were not looking for anything serious, so it was just a casual thing. Anyway, we continued to hook up occasionally and things started to progress. About 3 months ago we started hanging out more, and doing other things besides having sex. We even had a talk where we both acknowledged that we had started to get feelings for one another and that we should continue to get to know each other better. Things were going great and he started introducing me to all of his friends, and even his brother and father. Then, OUT OF THE BLUE, I mean, two days after I had spent a fun weekend with him and his brother, he tells me that we should take a break from having sex and try to be just friends. The reason being that things had been a bit intense lately, especially since he isnt looking for anything serious. He told me that he loves to hang out with me and to have sex with me, but acknowledged that us having sex should stop although he couldnt rule out it never happening again because he loves it. He also said that he didnt rule us out as a couple later on, but right now is not right for him.

I was in total shock, because I really dont know where he is coming from with all of this. He has been the initiator, wanting to hang out all the time, introducing me to his friends and family – pretty much pushing our relationship from a casual one to a more serious one. I´ve just followed his tempo, taking one day at a time. I´m not clingy or needy, in fact I can come across as the exact opposite most times. Anyway, I told him that I was willing to try being just friends, as long as it didnt get awkward or weird. He is my neighbor, we are in the same class, same study group and we share a lot of friends. I dont want any drama, and I really do want us to remain friends, so I figured it was best to at least give it a try. I cried for two days though (he doesnt know that) but got myself together, just trying to move on. We went out for drinks with a group of friends that following weekend, and I saw him kissing another girl but I pretended not to see it and danced with some guy friends instead. No kissing for my part, put a guy he knows actually tried to kiss me and I think he saw it.

Anyway, as far I as can tell from your other posts, I have unknowingly been practicing the no contact rule as far as the circumstances has let me (school has been a bit tricky) Lately he has been talking to me on facebook, sending me snaps, he even called me which was totally unnecessary. If I´ve had to respond, I´ve been very short and not really contributing to the conversation. Lately I´ve noticed him staring at me in class, but he behaves a bit weird towards me so I don´t know what he is up to. At school today he told me that he liked a post I had liked on facebook, and he touched my shoulder and told me that I looked very good today. This is really confusing to me, and I feel like he is sending me a lot of mixed signals.

I am so confused right now, and I am having trouble trying to figure out what he wants from me. First I figured he wanted me as his fallback girl or something like that, which btw is NEVER going to happen, and I even think he knows that (by not anyway). I´m starting to wonder if he might regret his decision a bit, or maybe he just seeks some kind of approval from me? I´m not going to give him that, although I really do want him back. I dont know that to do.

admin

February 9, 2015 at 3:54 pm

Out of curiosity what was the accident that lead you to me?

The idea is to make him regret his decision so if he is then that would really bode well for you.
Luna

February 9, 2015 at 10:08 pm

To be honest, it was not by accident at all. I was desperately browsing the internet for some advice, and somewhere in between all the yahoo pages your website popped up.

I think I got my answer this weekend. He texted me all day, telling me I should go out, and when I replied that I was in fact going out later, he replied “SWEET. Looking forward to it” But he noted that my responses were short and he asked for a smiley. He even called me later that day to tell me he had finished work and was on his way to a pre-party, but hoped to see me at the bar later on. At the bar he came up to me from behind, touched me by the hips and whispered hello. The rest of the night he was more concerned with dancing with this girl he used to have a thing with before he met me. She lives in another city but was visiting this weekend, and I don´t think he´s ever really gotten over her. I just want to move on, but his behavior is frustrating me. It´s like he is trying to mess with my head, which he does, but I happen to very good at hiding this from him. At least for now, but I´m starting to get pissed off.

I just want to know where we stand, and where I have him. But he behaves so strangely towards me, even some of our friends have started noticing. They thought he was depressed or that something is wrong. I have no idea, because we don´t really talk about stuff like that anymore. For a couple of seconds everything seems fine, but then the next it feels like we are complete strangers. I know that my behavior towards him is not very inviting, I am short in my responses and in a way I ignore him. He is always touching me while saying hello, and I don´t know if my “cold” responses triggers his awkward behavior, but it is getting WEIRD and I hate it. Sometimes he stares at me, then he ignores me, while I have been ignoring him all along. I don´t want to push him away, but I´m not going to let him use me or make me look like a fool.
admin

February 10, 2015 at 3:47 pm

Good deal!

Glad you are enjoying it.

When you look solely at his actions what do they tell you?

Are they conducive of someone who is in to you?
Luna

February 10, 2015 at 6:51 pm

That is what I am trying to figure out. One day they do, the other they don´t. Today was one of those days where his actions make me think that he might be into me. He was staring at me all day, and today he did not even try to hide it. I finally asked him what he was staring at, and he answered that he was looking at how beautiful I am. And later today, when I was going to the bathroom to check if my makeup was messed up, he stopped me and told that I looked perfect and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I am aware that this is not really actions, they are just words. But that is all contact we have these days, and it is starting to mess with my head. I´m still acting cool, not letting him know that he is getting to be, but he really is. The weirdest part is the fact that I am starting to enjoy it a bit, all though I am seriously confused. I don´t know him to explain it, but it is quite intriguing.
admin

February 11, 2015 at 1:48 pm

He is being hot and cold a lot with you huh?
Luna

February 15, 2015 at 8:31 am

VERY. He drove me home from school the other day, and in the car he started opening up about himself, his troubles and how he most times does not know what he wants and what he is doing. He insisted on hugging me goodbye. I think I´ve come to the conclusion that I´m better off without him. I´ll still be checking in on your other posts though.

Hey

February 6, 2015 at 2:41 pm

Hey n for you hoping it’s connected to exactly this topic.

My boyfriend and I didn’t really break up nor did we fight (like yelling, insulting.. nothing like that has ever happened to the two of us for these eight months of being together), but we stopped talking after I told him that I feel as if he likes me only when I’m in a good mood, yet ignores me when I’m not feeling well, when I’m having a bad day and so on.
When I told him that, he just tried to change the topic a couple of times, but I would ask him again eventually why he’s so mean and cruel sometimes.
On my last message he didn’t reply and since then we didn’t speak. It’s been a week by now.

But, a friend of his has been talking to me for those past days.
It didn’t seem weird at all in the beginning as that guy would normally talk to me from time to time. He’s a good friend of the guy I’m dating and so he became a good friend of mine.
But these days he was texting me constantly all the time, and he would mention my boyfriend at some point every now and then.
Now that I think of it, the two of them see each other every day as they study together, but never mind.

Yesterday he asked me why I was so moody these days, even though I really wasn’t. I told him I was fine, but then he became more direct, saying “he’s texting that other girl, just so you know”.

He also said the girl’s name and told me a bit about her (I never asked though), and I know perfectly well who the girl was as my boyfriend already told me about her and I know what his opinion of her was, and I knew for sure there was nothing between them.

I asked him why he was telling me all that, and then he said “because you’re the one who should be with him”.
It’s funny how my heart raced when he said that…
I asked him why, and he said “because you two love each other, it’s just that he’s a little.. clumsy”
A few minutes later he was explaining me how I shouldn’t be mad at him, how he does care but never knows what to tell me when I’m not feeling alright. Then he had to leave and I didn’t speak neither with him nor with my boyfriend (I refuse to call him an ex…) ever since.

I don’t like the fact it was his friend telling me all this, but somehow it appears to me as a good thing only.
Is it neccessary to go trough the NC? What should I do? And do you think he knows about the conversation his friend and I had? Could it be a sign he wants everything to be fine again? Because I never told his friend that we’re not talking, so it had to be him..

Thank you, Chris! It’s selfish but I’m really thankful for your existance!

admin

February 9, 2015 at 3:39 pm

In most cases it is necessary to go through NC if you want him back.

It might be a sign but don’t put all your stock into it.
Hey

February 6, 2015 at 2:43 pm

I don’t know what happened to the first sentence… It was supposed to be “Hey, Chris, I have a few questions for you”

Kitty

January 28, 2015 at 8:56 am

Hi,

I broke up with my ex due to his poor behavior 5 or so days ago. In the last three days he’s messaged me repeatedly and most recently very angrily. I don’t really want to talk to him right now. I want to get back together at some point, but not right now. I don’t think someone can change their behavior in a few days. How can I still keep the lines of communication open, while giving us both a break.

Thanks you for your input,

K

admin

January 28, 2015 at 5:04 pm

Give me an example of his poor behavior.
Kitty

January 28, 2015 at 7:54 pm

Hi,

Basically when we are in person there isn’t a lot of problems. But when we are long distance (we go to university together), he gets really weird. He starts fights with me over everything (I’m too nice, fight too much,message too much, too little, I’m not at home early enough, something I did long time ago starts to make him angry). This always winds up with him deciding to split up. Then we see each other again and things go back to normal. His behavior is erratic. This has happened so many times. I’ve asked many times if he wants to end it, but he always changes his mind.

Recently, after we were apart again he went from messaging me a lot to not wanting to talk. We had a fight about it and didn’t talk for a week. During that week he flirted with a lot of other girls. I broached the subject with him and he got very, very angry. I wrote him a letter saying that I’m tired of his lack of commitment and anger issues. If he wants to change I’ll stay, otherwise I’m done. He apologized, said he can’t change and said goodbye. I asked if he wanted to have a final conversation over Skype. He said tomorrow. I tried to call but he said he was sick and didnt want to talk. I wished him the best.

He messaged me a few days later saying he missed me. I didnt reply. He then messaged me asking when I was going back to school. I didnt reply. He then wrote to me swearing and asking me why I wasn’t answering. I gave him a one word answer.

I don’t know how to change this cycling behavior. I can’t handle the differences in his personality when he is far away, the anger, and the leaving. I want to get back together, but I don’t want a repeat if the previous problems.

I’m so sorry for this being so long. I’d really appreciate your insight on the situation.

Best regards,
Kitty

January 29, 2015 at 4:13 pm

Advice would be appreciated
admin

January 30, 2015 at 3:38 pm

What specifically?

Arusa

January 27, 2015 at 1:57 am

Hey Chris,

I commented previously and didnt hear back from you so you asked me to ask you again; here goes. Me and my boyfriend had been together for 4 years and things were rough at first and then he completly changed and starte giving me time and attention and i loved it to be honest i mean who wouldnt. But then i started lying to him and being all suspicious and i have been that over the years but i suppose he always kept giving me chances and eventually at the begining of last year he started to become distant with me again. Before i knew it he just told me he wanted to “take a step back” and i should focus on myself and he needs time to clear his head. Over the space of the time he became more and more angry and horrible to me. Then he changed and he was alot nicer. We do still speak to each other and see each other and we even hug and kiss but ive never known whats going on in his head. This has been happening for 7 months now almost and im really lost and confused and upset. When we meet up we usually have a really nice time together and i even told him ‘i love you once’ and he took a few moments and i persuaded him but he said i love you too back. And i was soo happy but when i asked him to get back together he said he didnt want to talk about it or answer any questions. After that we went home he was okay we exchanged some nice texts that night baring in mind this was the first time during this 7 month period he told me he loved me in the past when i would say it he would just say thankyou or cool. But after those texts for a week he ignored me and he tends to do that alot we have a nice time together and hes involved as much as i am and then he becomes cold and distant when we go home. There will be the odd day where he picks up my calls and we have a nice convo but once we meet up hes distant again. Then one of the days he was being really weird with me over the fne and i just brought up how we spend time together and its nice and he just said “yeah its nice we have a chit chat” and that annoyed me and i said well we do hug and kiss and he goes “yeah we need to lay off that” im like you initiate it and he blamed it on me. That i try to hug him and kiss him i do ask him for a hug but he does kiss me by his own will too. And when i say why cant you control yourself he responded “i can but i dont want to upset you so i go ahead with it” like how rude. I know i get upset if he doesnt hug me or kiss me but why is he blaming it on me? He goes “i told you im taking a step back chillaxing”. I go that was 7 months ago now almost and he goes ” i told you its not working out”. Then when i said to him you told me you loved me the other day and withing a split second he said “that was in the moment.” Like how? How do you tell someone you love them too in the moment? Can that happen? And he hasnt had a moment like this before so why now? Im just scared i dont want to lose him and i really want him back and i will change but he feels like i wont becauseni havent in the past. Please help me get a better understanding of his mind because its driving me crazy. I love him alot and i want to work this out. Im afraid if i dont contact him for 30 days hell move on. Ive done it for 4 days then i end up giving in and he can be really horrible sometimes. Please help me im desperate. also i cant remember the last time he picked up the fne and rang me or text me
Himself. He’ll usually respond to my calls like ill call you back inabit or let me call you back and he never does. Or if he does he tells me to call him its like hes trying to save his credit but who for? Or maybe im overthinking i do tend to do that. Sometimes he tells me he wants to spend time with me or says he wants to go out to eat together then ignored me. Im confused sometimes he makes me feel like itll all be okay and the next hes being cold and distant again.

Please help me. I really want him back.

Kindest regards,
Arusa

admin

January 27, 2015 at 2:58 pm

Thank you!

He is really giving you a lot of mixed signals, huh?

I really don’t think hed move on in 30 days if you don’t contact him. You could be hurtin gyour chances by remaining in contact actually.
Arusa

January 29, 2015 at 1:13 am

Hey,

Do you think there is a chance we could get back together again at all?

Thanks,
Arusa
admin

January 29, 2015 at 2:57 pm

Sure there is a chance.
Arusa

February 13, 2015 at 3:33 am

Hey,

I tried speaking to him and have him take me back but hes being so adamant on not. Its breaking my heart he thinks thats whats best for me but its not. But when i ask him if we will ever get back together again either hell say i dont know what the future holds or he wont say anything. Ive asked him if he loves me and he wont reply but he does want to be friends. I cant be just friends i want him back why is he being so adamant. He hates it when i cry because after hearing all that i burst into tears and he was upset too and tried to calm me down and told me hes sorry. He goes you can hate me i wont blame you but i cant hate him i wish i could but i cant.

I cant move on i dont want to he says he wants me to be happy why wont he realise ill only ever be happy with him. Hes being stubborn. Please help me. It really hurts me i wanna try one last time but he thinks it wont work.

Why does he still wanna speak to me but yet he doesnt want to kiss or have sex because he says he feels guilty and he doesnt want to mess with me. Hes such a good guy and i really messed up and i regret it i wish i hadnt done what i did i want to put things right but he wont realise it. We can make it work i know it. My whole worlds fallen apart please help me.

Sarah

January 25, 2015 at 10:11 pm

Forgot to mention that he has a rebound girl.. We have been broken up 9 weeks and spoke every week up until the no contact period.

admin

January 26, 2015 at 3:54 pm

How long has he been dating the rebound.
Sarah

January 26, 2015 at 8:44 pm

Couple weeks I assume? Not 100% sure he’s someone who dates lots of girls at the same time, he was single for 5 years before me he’s exactly like George clooney like u described so I have no idea if there’s more than one or just her
admin

January 27, 2015 at 2:41 pm

Yup, couple of weeks.

Umm what gives you th efeeling that there could be more girls?

Sarah

January 25, 2015 at 10:08 pm

Day 20/30 he sent me snapchat this week and the week before and I havnt responded obviously because I am very disciplined, I’ve had no test messages though… But now he has deleted me from Instagram.. Does this mean he’s over me and has moved on? Or do u think my awsome fun photos are making him angry and he had to delete me?
Arusa

January 23, 2015 at 9:34 pm

Hey,

Could you please reply to my previous comments please i really need your help.

Kindest regards,
Arusa

admin

January 26, 2015 at 2:16 pm

Could you just ask me again?

That would be more helpful.

Sarah

January 23, 2015 at 7:17 am

You mentioned in this post that the ex bf could initiate contact (text/email/facebook message) with the ex gf, and then the ex gf should just ignore him (per the NC rule, obviously).

But what if the way he initiates contact doesn’t allow for her to directly contact him back?

Example: My NC period started a little over a week ago. My ex is still a follower on my Instagram (I’m assuming because most guys don’t delete girls the way girls do that to guys, and not because he just wants to spy on me). Today he “liked” two of my posts.. one that I posted 6 days ago and one that I posted yesterday.

Which possibility is greater?

A) he’s letting me know he’s thinking about me and trying to hint that it’s ok if I contacted him directly; OR

B) I’m just over-anayzing this and it really just means that he likes the pictures – nothing more, nothing less.

I tried to search in your archives for the answer to this first but only found examples of direct contact vs indirect contact. Oh, and don’t worry… I haven’t contacted him and don’t plan on it.

admin

January 23, 2015 at 4:39 pm

No, I think there is more to a guy liking pictures than normal. I think it does mean something. However, I also do think you are overanalyzing. It means something yes but not the biggest thing in the world.

Good sign though.

Linda

January 22, 2015 at 8:48 pm

I have a question why would my ex block me off Facebook if we haven’t even talked in 6 months why do that now and not before can someone explain to me this ?? Thanks God bless

admin

January 23, 2015 at 4:15 pm

Maybe because every time he sees your face it brings up unresolved feelings?

Chloe

January 22, 2015 at 12:55 pm

My ex and I broke up 9 months ago, I broke up with him and he was really upset I went through the normal grieving process and then decided I want him back I miss him and miss how we used to be I don’t know if he wants me back too he has been hanging around with me more lately and it kind of feels like it used to . He did the whole date a girl straight away thing and it didn’t last but how do I tell him how I feel after I hurt him so badly?
Arusa

January 13, 2015 at 1:53 am

also i cant remember the last time he picked up the fne and rang me or text me
Himself. He’ll usually respond to my calls like ill call you back inabit or let me call you back and he never does. Or if he does he tells me to call him its like hes trying to save his credit but who for? Or maybe im overthinking i do tend to do that. Sometimes he tells me he wants to spend time with me or says he wants to go out to eat together then ignored me. Im confused sometimes he makes me feel like itll all be okay and the next hes being cold and distant again.
Arusa

January 13, 2015 at 1:48 am

Hey Chris,

Im usually not the type to comment or ask someone for help like this but like they say desperate times call for desperate mesaures. Me and my boyfriends had been together for 4 years and things were rough at first and then he completly changed and starte giving me time and attention and i loved it to be honest i mean who wouldnt. But then i started lying to him and being all suspicious and i have been that over the years but i suppose he always kept giving me chances and eventually at the begining of last year he started to become distant with me again. Before i knew it he just told me he wanted to “take a step back” and i should focus on myself and he needs time to clear his head. Over the space of the time he became more and more angry and horrible to me. Then he changed and he was alot nicer. We do still speak to each other and see each other and we even hug and kiss but ive never known whats going on in his head. This has been happening for 7 months now almost and im really lost and confused and upset. When we meet up we usually have a really nice time together and i even told him ‘i love you once’ and he took a few moments and i persuaded him but he said i love you too back. And i was soo happy but when i asked him to get back together he said he didnt want to talk about it or answer any questions. After that we went home he was okay we exchanged some nice texts that night baring in mind this was the first time during this 7 month period he told me he loved me in the past when i would say it he would just say thankyou or cool. But after those texts for a week he ignored me and he tends to do that alot we have a nice time together and hes involved as much as i am and then he becomes cold and distant when we go home. There will be the odd day where he picks up my calls and we have a nice convo but once we meet up hes distant again. Then one of the days he was being really weird with me over the fne and i just brought up how we spend time together and its nice and he just said “yeah its nice we have a chit chat” and that annoyed me and i said well we do hug and kiss and he goes “yeah we need to lay off that” im like you initiate it and he blamed it on me. That i try to hug him and kiss him i do ask him for a hug but he does kiss me by his own will too. And when i say why cant you control yourself he responded “i can but i dont want to upset you so i go ahead with it” like how rude. I know i get upset if he doesnt hug me or kiss me but why is he blaming it on me? He goes “i told you im taking a step back chillaxing”. I go that was 7 months ago now almost and he goes ” i told you its not working out”. Then when i said to him you told me you loved me the other day and withing a split second he said “that was in the moment.” Like how? How do you tell someone you love them too in the moment? Can that happen? And he hasnt had a moment like this before so why now? Im just scared i dont want to lose him and i really want him back and i will change but he feels like i wont becauseni havent in the past. Please help me get a better understanding of his mind because its driving me crazy. I love him alot and i want to work this out. Im afraid if i dont contact him for 30 days hell move on. Ive done it for 4 days then i end up giving in and he can be really horrible sometimes. Please help me im desperate.

Kindest regards,
Arusa
shei

January 8, 2015 at 4:54 pm

Okay. So my ex boyfriend and I broke up about 4 years ago we dated for about 2 years. Now, I am dating someone else, and so is he, he left me for someone else which is still the girl hes with now. I still felt somethig for him when we broke up so I would constantly text him but he wouldnt always answer. After about 4 months, we both stopped talking completely and we didnt speak or see eachother for about half a year after that. Then,I started seeing him again around town, we live in the same small town. After about a year and a half of our breakup he texted me. I didnt answer because I was in a relationship. Then as time went on he continued to text me every couple of weeks and just ask me how i was doing. I answered him once and he immediately asked to see me. We never met up. He has been dating this girl and I have been dating someone for about 2 years. Then, for some reason his girl gives me dirty looks when she sees me and she completely hates me, i never even knew who she was befote that and anyways its been so long since him and me were over, so why does she freak out still?. My boyfriend and i are happy together, i am no longer interested in my ex, he was the one that ended the relationship. Why does he text back now that he should know i am not interested? The few times we did speak, he would ask me if i was in a relationship then immediately ask to see me i would shut him out and tell him i am haopy because honestly I am. Its kind of getting annoying now cuz when he texts me i just remember what he did to me. I just dont get it.

admin

January 19, 2015 at 3:11 pm

Well,l if you are happy with your current boyfriend why are you having feelings for your ex?

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