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Amy
February 1, 2017 at 2:50 pm
Hi.
I split up with my partner 6 months ago. We have 2 children together and have been together 12 years childhood sweethearts. Things got really bad over the last 2 years a lot of arguments and he doesn’t have a really good temper. It’s got to the point wherey family just don’t get on with him at all, he sees the lids every other weekend. When we first split up we was talking over the phone a lot but recently contact as died down quite a lot I have mixed emotions all the time sometimes I miss him like crazy and have a really bad week other times I feel ok. I get the impression he wants me to chase him bit I have been the one that’s done all the trying before so this time I refuse to do that, I’m finding it hard to understand how he really feels none of us are dating anyone or to my knowledge he isn’t. He got angry because he saw me on a dating website sent me some horrible txts, I get odd messages every now and then the last one when he was on a night out saying I’m your and yours only. The truth is I just can’t see my life without I’m not sure if that’s because we’ve been together so long and its all I’ve known or because I truly love him I don’t know what to do from here just carry on and get on with my life and see if nature brings us back together or what? Any advice
Amy
February 1, 2017 at 3:46 pm
I just wouldn’t know what to say and I don’t want to be the one to chase after him as it as always been me that has tried and done the running. We split up once before for around 5 months and I let it be known to him I wanted him back he kept so too much had happened ext but then a few months down line he came an sed he wanted to try an that he wasn’t been fair towards me. I just don’t know what to do for best and it seems he has some changing to do before I would want to get back with him I’m also finding it hard coz him an my family can’t stand each other?
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 2, 2017 at 3:48 pm
then, do minimal contact..focus in healing and improving yourself and being more rational. And also, realistically, you have to keep in mind that people will change only if they want to and it will always be for themselves. That’s why you need to have standards, so that you know who and what can stay in your life.. Check this one:
Get Your Boyfriend Back If You Have A Child Together
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 1, 2017 at 3:37 pm
Hi Amy,
why not talk to him first?
Emma
January 29, 2017 at 2:22 am
My ex left me like 1 month ago and officially stop talking 3 weeks ago… we dated for 4 years but the las 2 were kind of weird ! I had to move out so it was a long distance relationship, I got busy with work so it wasn’t the same… he got a new job and now he works at home ! He left me saying he needs to focus on his work and school. He said he did not want a relationship right now, and he couldn’t be back with me anymore. He said he wanted to enjoy his life.. what got me confused is that he told me to please not to block him on social media, he wanted to contact me in the future, when he gets his life together , if I’m single still we may work in the future… that got me confused .. i don’t know what to do , I want to move on but I can’t at the same time. Miss him so much and I feel like I did not give my 100% in this relationship ! told him that and he told me it was too late … the idea of seeing him with someone else kills me …
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 29, 2017 at 11:54 am
Hi Emma,
do you want to try the no contact rule? you dont have to block him, if you are going to do so
Kayleigh
January 27, 2017 at 11:05 am
My boyfriend and I dated for two years and two months. He broke it off with me for petty fighting and lack of communication. It will he two weeks tomorrow and I think out of all that I myself contacted him 3 times. I’ve had friends and family ask him how he’s.doing but I myself haven’t talked to him since January 17th. Now, he still has.my stuff and I’m not one bit concerned about it because I am trying the no contact rule and everyone is saying if it was done and over with and he wanted to move on, he would’ve dropped my stuff off in no time.
Just wondering, if i keep this no contact going should I hear from.him at some point? He told one of my friends once things calm down and I pull myself together we need to discuss what needs to be. I just really want this to work.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 27, 2017 at 12:24 pm
Hi Kayleigh,
it’s not a requirement that you should hear from him..what’s more important is that you improve during and after no contact perios
Melania
January 25, 2017 at 10:16 am
Hi!
My boyfriend broke up with me a month ago. We’ve been together for two months and the relationship was doing great, we didn’t fight about anything or have any misunderstandings, but maybe because the relationship was still pretty fresh he didn’t really admit officially to his group of friends that we’re dating. We broke up because when I was out at a party, his drunken friend, while we were standing alone talking (who didn’t know I was seeing anybody) has suddenly kissed me. It was a complete shock for me and I told the guy to leave me alone immediately (luckily no contact from him from that day), but I was afraid to tell about this situation to my boyfriend, who is a very jealous type, and I didn’t want to ruin his friendship with this guy as well. However, after two weeks, my boyfriend has found out about this situation from their mutual friend, and the guy who was drunk was telling the story that I was the one who kissed him and was flirting with him. My boyfriend at first believed in all of this, and even after me telling him my side of story he still decided that he has to break up with me, not because that other guy kissed me (which he admitted that was not my fault) but because I didn’t tell him about that. It didn’t change his mind knowing that I’ve been struggling with abuse from guys like that in my past. However, he is not a typical guy, he is a very stubborn and a narcissistic person, with a huge ego and a big want to control other people, so he had to be right with his decision. I was pretty devastated at the beginning, but applied the no contact rule. After a week from the breakup he wrote me a message saying that he feels sorry that it all happened so badly, but he honestly wishes me all the best. I just wrote him back that I wish him the same. For the next month he was still acting like he wanted to remain “friends”, liking my pictures on facebook, checking on my social media. I was living my life, gaining confidence and happiness, I did some daily updates on my instagram, about my work outs and new looks, but a few days ago I posted a pretty attractive selfie on snapchat, nothing too provocative, just in a new dress to feel myself. On the next day I posted a new profile picture on facebook, which he didn’t like (he usually liked all of them), but I thought that maybe he didn’t notice it. However, one of his male friends, whom I’ve met through my ex (and my ex knows that we like each other, but just as distant friends), liked my picture and wrote a funny comment under it. After that I knew that my ex could get jealous, but I didn’t think it would matter much, since for the last month he was acting like we’re keeping things casual. But my ex, who is pretty emotional went angry and unfollowed me on instagram, which was pretty upsetting for me, because even if I wasn’t to win him back I wanted to at least remain friends. I feel like he hates me for moving on, and I’ve noticed that now he is trying to show off that he is doing better than me and he doesn’t care about me. What should I do in this situation, and are there still any chances of getting back together, considering his ego, competitiveness and jealousy problems?
Thanks for your help!
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 25, 2017 at 3:44 pm
Hi Melania,
you said he’s narcissistic,.so.you mean he got angry because you’re moving on and that he wants you to chase him?
Jay
January 23, 2017 at 12:21 pm
Hi,
My ex-boyfriend recently dumped me because he wanted time to mature as a person and focus on his studies and hockey because he is a junior league hockey player. Long distance was stressing him out and he thought I deserved better because he couldn’t be there for me when I needed him. When we broke up he wanted to remain as friends and we tried doing no contact for two weeks, but it didn’t work because we were inseparable and we clearly still had deep feelings for each other. Although we are both young, we are best friends; we can talk about anything and we can rely on each other when we need to.
After 3 weeks, we still have remained friends just like he wanted to. I’m visiting him in February (after 9 months of long distance) as a ‘friend’ but it’s clear we are both emotionally attached. I’m not sure what he wants; to remain friends or to try our relationship again. What confuses me is that even though he is the one that ended things with me and wanted to be friends, he still calls me by the nickname he used to call me when we were dating and he would still give me a kiss through facetime like he used to when we were still together. I tell him that we can no longer do those things because we’re ‘friends’ but he sometimes says things like he misses me and that he loves me. What do I do? I want to get back with him because I still have feelings for him, but he ended things with me…
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 24, 2017 at 11:43 am
Hi Jay,
the reason it’s advisable that the no contact period should be done right after the break up is because by human nature, he’s still used to having you in his life. So, the longer you don’t do it after the break up, the less it can help and the higher chances of you being friendzoned.
Julie
January 13, 2017 at 4:40 am
My ex and I were married with kids for almost 12 years. He left because he wanted freedom. We no longer live in the same state since the break up. I found out he started dating someone within two months of the break up. It’s been three years and he’s still with her but they don’t live together. He recently started contacting me again and said he only wants to be friends because he needs me. But we have had conversations with very heavy sexual content which he said just happened, and was the one that imitated it. I know his girlfriend is the rebound chick, but also, the grass was greener at the time chick as well. I think he secretly wants to get back with me but won’t even admit it to himself for fear of the problems we did have in our relationship in the past. I am not the same person I was then and I know it would be different now. I don’t want to waste my time and have him break my heart again even though he said he never stopped loving me. But what he hasn’t said is that he wants me back. How do know if this is even worth exploring?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 13, 2017 at 3:20 pm
Hi Julie,
you have kids, it’s inevitable that you would see each other. Let him invest more for you than you for him. If he’s being sexual, dont go too far. If he really wants to be back with you then let him work for it.
Auly
December 30, 2016 at 10:47 am
Hi Chris!
The title suits to my situation but unfortunately my ex is the one who wants me back so bad. And i think this driving me crazy.
Its been 2 years ago when we were dating. But only lasted a few months because he texted me every single minute while we always met each other at class. I felt bored already but i tried to be patient. Until one day, i was going to meet a foreign guy whom i have talked with before on the internet. He was visiting the city i worked in and offered me for a meet up. Personally and honestly, i never thought of this (foreign) guy to be my boyfriend because he’s typically a ‘quite’ guy and didn’t catch my attention at all. But since he lived in my country for 2 years, i’d really love to meet him. So, i told my (then) boyfriend that i would like to meet a friend and asked for a direction. He asked me every single questions about my friend and i answered it truthfully. He did tell me the directions but he also told the other people about me meeting a foreign guy (which is like a negativity in our culture). I was completely upset and ‘exploded’ until a few hours later i broke up with him. I also promised to myself that it was okay not meeting my friend, but i had to break up with him.
A few days later, a co-worker said she would accompany me to see the foreign guy. And i still managed to see him, and he was so quite the entire conversation.
A few months after breaking up, i still let my ex on my social medias to peek how am i doing on my personal life. But i caught him stalking my social media called Path where you could get a notification whenever somebody visited your profile. He wasn’t only visiting my profile but also giving ‘like’ to my posts of 1 year ago (when we’re still dating)! Thought i had enough about letting him know about my personal life, then i deleted him everywhere.
2 years passed and my bestfriend from Uni told me he kept asking about me. Jokingly told my bestfriend he’s saving money to get married and when my bestfriend asked him with whom, he said he would wait for me first to get married. Which scares me more, what would happen if i still manage to be friends with him? And how do i completely disappear from him?
If you could give me advices on how to avoid him, i might think twice before commiting suicide.
Thank you
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 30, 2016 at 3:23 pm
Hi Auly,
why are you afraid? And why are you going to be friends with him if you are going to avoid him?
Maai
December 28, 2016 at 7:01 pm
Hey.
Hey.
Ummm.. I would be really glad, if you replied to this message.
Well after the breakup my ex acted “crazy” you know like updating status and tagging many people saying he is very excited. We broke up on June. But the next month a friend of his who did a lot just to keep us together said hey via Facebook. I did not reply to him. Again in August this Friend of his again said hey to me via Facebook. I did not reply to him. After like two to three days his other friend tagged my ex with some girl in a post to make it official. But again his friend who said hey to me via fbto me talked via Instagram after like two weeks of that post which was updated by his other friend.
This friend wished me as it was my birthday. I replied to him next day. Once i replied he said can we talk via Viber. I said I don’t use it. He said he was sorry for not replying to me when I texted to him during the break up time. And asked me whether I was mad at him. I said no and its ok. And he said he just wanted to wish me as my ex said its my birthday and said bye.
After like 3 days I said I am sorry for being crazy weirdo and wished him luck for his o’level. He said it’s ok he understand and said thanks. Asked me what’s up and asked me whether I am dating. I said I am dating my subjects. And he asked me how’s me and whether I have moved on? I said I am good. And Ignored the move on question. He started talking his girlfriend that they broke up and eventually got back together after like week. I said yeah nice and things happenen for a good reason. And I said see iam mature? He said yeah you are and asked whether I broke up with my ex cause I am immature? I said no i don’t know. And started to tease me on topic about maturity of me. And said bye.
The next day , the friend who tagged my ex and some girl , gave some likes on two instagrsm photo which I posted weeks ago. After like Weeks, since there was no news from my ex or his friends I send a photo of someone to the friend whom talked to me saying seems like his duplicate. When I sent that his first reply was is that my dad in law? I said no but , looks like you. He said it’s not him.
Very recently his friend who tagged my ex with some girl wrote my ex and my together name as his nick in a post which he shared asking for his nick names. My ex even shared a post which says “maybe we will meet again and start all over”
After like 2 to 3 days of this post of my ex, again the friend who talked to me said hey through instagrsm. I replied to it after like 6 hours. He started a conversation and said whether I use Viber? I said no. He said hows me and he broke up with his girlfriend. I said what’s with me that you and girlfriend broke up. He said he thoughts to text me as he thinks his girlfriend did to him what my ex did to him and asked me what happene d with me and ex for a break up? And whether I still want him back? I said I don’t know. For More information text my ex. He was like Tell him.
When I did not answer that question, he changed the topic and said he can share anything with him now. I know he was referring “anything” to talk about my ex. Cause that Friend did alot to make us to be as a couple.
So I answer ed why? Just to not show how needy I am. He replied cause he his single and can be there to text me. I said eww, no way. He said why did you say eww? I said what’s your aim of talking to me? He said he just want to text me cause I texted alot at the break up time with him. But won’t text me again cause I misunderstood.
But later after some time I said sorry for being rude. He said I am assuming stuffs. The next day I said what’s up to him? He said nothing much and text him through viber if I want to talk to him cause this chat log is boring as hell. I said bye then.after like few days I sent a thumbs up to my ex accidentally. But no reply from him still. He still show off how chill life he is having by being very updated about his whereabouts on social network. He started being like this after our break up.
And recently i said tell my ex that i miss my ex to his friend whom i talked. He said ok and changed his instagram id name and deleted his recent Post on instagram. After like a week , this friend of his changed his instagram id to his original name and replied heyy to me via instagram
Well all of his tried alot to make us together since the beginning to the end.
So do you think this friend would talk to me again and whether my ex and I would have a chance to be together? The post of that official thing is no more on facebook.
We were together for 0a year and both of us are 16 years old.
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 30, 2016 at 7:28 am
Hi Maai,
when was the last time you talked to that friend and when was the last time you talked to your ex? I think you should stop talking to that friend, it’s not helping you..
Samantha
December 28, 2016 at 6:52 pm
My bf And I broke up 3 months ago, we were together for a year. He has blocked me on everything but his friends tell me he talks about me all the time not in a good way though. He seems to have a lot of anger towards me and I’m not sure why. His friends tell me I’m still on his mind. I don’t understand what he’s trying to do.
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 30, 2016 at 7:19 am
Hi Samantha,
do you want to move or try again? Why did you break up? even if it has been months since the break up, if its not focused in improving yourself and in actively posting in social media, that’s not a no contact period
Jane
December 20, 2016 at 9:17 am
Hi, my boyfriend and I split up on Friday (4 days ago) we have been having a rough time of it lately & Friday was particularly bad. It seemed he’d been getting at me all day and I finally snapped and ordered him out of my car. I went back practically straight away but he refused to get in. I tried again and he told me to go f myself. I drove home & when he eventually got back he began packing his things. He said I’m a c-word, that he despises me & that he’d been kidding himself for the past few weeks that it could work. This has happened before and I usually beg him to stay or I beg him to come talk to me after. He literally took everything. He messaged me on Saturday around 5.30 asking if I was in & when I asked why he said he’d forgotten some things (jeans, dad’s hedge trimmer & small tv) I told him I’d take them to my mums for him as I couldn’t see him but he told me to keep the stuff. I messaged the next day apologising about my behaviour & he didn’t rePly. He messaged yesterday asking about a parcel that had been delivered &when I asked if he’d talk to me he said no, that he was done & that nothing would change his mind. I felt so upset I blocked him and deleted our messages. We were together just over 2years. Will he call or is it over?
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 22, 2016 at 3:44 pm
Hi Jane,
he’s not going to call if he’s annoyed.. are you going to try the no contact rule?
Nicole
December 13, 2016 at 3:06 am
Hi y’all!
So my bf broke up with me in Oct out of no where.
I did all the mistakes, begging, stalking, pleading, calls and texts.
I failed the NC twice.
I am currently on it now.
He has since then sent me random texts: a picture, and a really weird text.
I didn’t respond.
I have worked on myself since the breakup. I’m. working out, going out with friends, focusing on school.
I got a new hair cut and even went on 5 dates.
I feel really good and have come to terms with the breakup. I also realize that we may or may not get back together and I will be okay.
I feel good now, no as emotional.
I still miss him and love him.
I asked him today for my stuff back.
He got mad! I didn’t think he would be so upset.
It’s been 2 months since the break up.
He told me to fuck off and goodbye.
Is this a good thing that he’s still angry?
What should I do now?
Thanks.
Nicole
Nicole
December 14, 2016 at 2:45 am
Hi Amor,
We were together for 4 years.
I am in 14 days no contact.
I plan for nc till Feb.
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 15, 2016 at 1:37 am
Ah, just 14 days.. yes, it can still be a good sign that he’s angry. It’s his way of trying to make you reply.
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 13, 2016 at 8:40 pm
Hi Nicole,
How long was the relationship and how many days are you in the nc now?
Justine
December 11, 2016 at 8:48 pm
Boyfriend broke up with me on November 30. I’ve been trying to no contact rule but I saw him at the gym yesterday and caved. I asked him to come over and he said he would let me know. I sat there for 5 hours waiting for that to happen and he never texted or anything. I then find out he’s at a bar he hates with someone he isn’t necessarily fond of. Me being stupid, I texted him and let him know I’m there if he needs a ride to which no reply. I feel so stupid for thinking either of those would be a good idea and I’m not sure what to do. I have this note written out explaining how he hurt me and I just want to be friends, and frankly I’m kind of over the fact that we’re over. I know it’s probably best if I keep that note to myself right? I just feel the need to get it out that I deserve more respect than a no reply and an “I’ll let you know.”
Please help 🙁
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 14, 2016 at 2:41 pm
HI Justine,
yup, don’t give that note. That’s more chasing. If you want, restart the no contact rule. And really make it seem you’re moving on.
Stephanie
December 4, 2016 at 6:23 am
Hi.
My ex ex cheated and left me for the girl he cheated on me with, unfortunately I can’t do the NC rule as we have 4 kids together(been together for almost 10 years). At first when he left he didn’t call or came to see the kids for 2-3 weeks and then he started calling and coming to see the kids and took them with him a few times which caused a lot of arguments because I didn’t want her around my kids because I felt like it’s not good for them right now as they’re having a very difficult time with the fact their dad is gone and he should give them the time to get over it before he brings them around her but he didn’t listen and did it anyway which caused a lot more problems with the kids who are obviously not happy to see their dad with someone else than mom but recently he agreed to come see them at the house(which really surprised me and thought it was strange of him since he’s so stubborn and only wants his way). Despite everything that happened and him cheating I kinda understand, he got laid off and money was a huge caused of stress for both of us which in turn caused a lot of arguments between us and I think he felt depressed and like he wasn’t good enough for me and the kids. I do still love him and yes I want him back and even though I couldn’t do the NC rule I never told him I wanted him back(however I think my kids might have told him a few things like I miss him and I wish he was home with us because everytime we have an argument he blurts out “I don’t want to be with you” and the last time he told me that I asked him why he always says that since it got nothing to do with the conversation and he didn’t say anything. Another thing I forgot to mention, after he left he was really nasty to me and acted as if I was the one who cheated and left him, he also kept denying she was his girlfriend and kept saying there was no relationship even though he knew that I knew she was living there sleeping in his bed, up until recently and he also talked to our kids about him not living with us anymore but he told them it was OUR decision(it wasn’t mine and I didn’t have any say about anything) and he also told my daughter he’s not coming home because mommy is mad at him after my daughter told him that mommy wish daddy was home. As for him being nasty it’s mainly when there’s people with him when we’re talking on the phone and he also act very impatient with me even though I’m being nice to him, also when he needs help with something he comes to me instead of asking his girlfriend which I told him many times it should be her doing it not me.. sorry for the long comment and I’m sure I forgot to mention other things that are important but please help I’m confused. Why is he acting like I’m the one who cheated and left and why would he be mad at me? Because when he left I didn’t beg for him to stay and told him I didn’t want him back? Another thing, when he’s using his phone to watch videos on YouTube he’s still using my account so when I went in “search” to type something I saw that he listened to the song “Life after you” so it makes me wonder could he be afraid to tell me he made a mistake and regret everything he’s done or he really don’t want to be with me? Because when he tells me he doesn’t want to be with me or he doesn’t care about me is only during arguments.
Please help! Thank you
Stephanie
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 5, 2016 at 12:22 am
Hi Stephanie,
he probably relates you to negativity because of the arguments and he’s tired of it..he’s anger can be more of a defense mechanism or a way for him to still have a sense of power..
You can still try nc, it will be limited..check this:
Get Your Boyfriend Back If You Have A Child Together
Sasha
December 3, 2016 at 11:22 am
My ex of 4 years and 7 months broke up with me for cheating. I have to say, I never meant to do it, but I felt alone and weak. So it happened. We were on and off until I realized he had a girlfriend. I called him out and he cut all contact with me. I became obsessive. He tells me he wants a future with me, yet he gets with this chick instead? One night I went on a texting rampage and he responded with a hurtful but to an extent truthful message. To out it short, he’s hurting still. And he’s drinking himself to sleep. Fast forward to a few months later. I sent a friend to his door because I was afraid of being sent away. His family left a message suggesting I “get over it like he did” but he has yet to speak to me. I stopped talking to him a month from then. I decided to poke him on Facebook and he poked me back. This went on for a few days and then deleted my poke. I sent him a link with all of our Facebook history on it (the date we met, got engaged, photos everything) and he blocked me from messaging him. I noticed that he’ll block me from messaging him multiple times, but later on unblock me. What should I do? I’ve been planning to message him and say I won’t be chasing him anymore. I’ve been really hurting. Do I send the message? Why is he acting like this? Are these signs that he does want to keep in contact?
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 3, 2016 at 5:23 pm
Hi Sasha,
maybe he’s open on being friends.. If you’re going to restart the no contact rule, do 45 days and act as if you’re moving on..continue the routine you started during nc even after nc..
Amber
December 2, 2016 at 11:42 pm
Ok so my ex and I broke up 5 years ago, he wants to get drinks/ dinner this Sunday when I said I might not be able to make it his response was “aww damnit” followed by “Id love to see you”. I dont know if hes lying, playing me, just wants a booty call or if I should go or bail….. I asked him where he wanted to meet he replied ill figure that out… I dont know what to think.
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 3, 2016 at 3:17 pm
Hi Amber,
did you really mean 5 years or 5 days?
Beth
December 2, 2016 at 9:04 pm
My ex and I were together for 4 years. I haven’t moved on and I cry every night because I miss him. I don’t call him. I am very confused I don’t know what to do, my ex and Ibroke up 2 months ago, we haven’t talked since then. But during those 2 months he called me 3 times and they were late night calls telling me he missed me and that he doesn’t want me back but I know that was because he was hurt and trying to hurt me tooo. I never called him unless it concerned about our line together which I was getting off. Also other times he called was about him getting his bike back , which never happened. This happened twice. Barely last night he called me late night again telling me about a dream he had, ( That I was with anoher guy) then he asked me what time I am off of work I told him and he said he is off at 8 , that he wants to talk to me. I don’t know what to do, I am scared and sad . It will be the first time we sad eacother after the break up .
EBR Team Member: Amor
December 3, 2016 at 2:47 pm
Hi beth,
why did you break up? Talk to him first, and then update us
Sandy Acosta
November 29, 2016 at 8:26 pm
Okay, so…..my bf broke up with me a week ago and went to move in with his mom but he still left some stuff in my room. I was so heart broken for the first 3 days after the break up. We been together for 2 years and a half. The fourth day he asked if he can come over to pick up his stuff, I said its okay but I’m not gonna be there since he has the keys I really don’t need to be there. He said he felt weird going there because of my family but I told him they don’t care. I did a mistake and stayed, he came and we ended up going to the movies, after that we came back in my room and he kissed me so it led to sex. When he left I got mad because he said it wasn’t suppose to happen and he still needs more time? The next day he said he forgot something and he wanted me to be there again with the same excuse that he feels weird if I’m not there. He cane by but this time we didn’t do anything except hug and he took me to Dennis to eat. Then I told him he needs to really get all his stuff out of my room because he can’t just be coming over like that! I told him I can’t see him and it makes it so hard for me to move on. He said true. I do want him back and i want to apply the NC rule but it’s so hard whenkeeps coming by for his things. What is going on with him!!! Also I don’t text him, he usually does but it’s to tell me he’s coming over for his stuff.
EBR Team Member: Amor
November 29, 2016 at 10:17 pm
Hi Sandy,
it’s ok to talk about his stuff but don’t go out with him to eat if you’re there when he’s getting his stuff and don’t reply if he texts for small talk. You should be focused in yourself, healing and improving during the no contact rule.
Julie Sanders
November 29, 2016 at 6:08 pm
My boyfriend of 8 years just told me he needed space after a big argument. He left and is staying with a friend. He keeps wanting to talk and text everyday for the past 4 days since he left. I think we talk more now then during the relationship. He says he is still deciding what he wants to do, stay together or move on. Today he wants to meet in person. 1. Is that a good sign? 2. How much time should I give him to make up his mind? 3. Is he just leading me on with the constant talking so that I don’t drift while he is deciding? 4. Is the constant talking making the maybe pending break easier on him?
Any insight would be helpful. This is a new area to me.
TIA
EBR Team Member: Amor
November 29, 2016 at 9:53 pm
Hi Julie,
it’s just been days.. It’s normal that he’s still missing you. Go, and talk to him.. Try to talk about what you should do and not do to make the relationship work
Sangeetha D
November 28, 2016 at 11:46 am
Mine is a long distant relationship. We recently broke up. Let’s say I’m implementing this No contact rule. What if he thinks that I’m fine and moved on, and doesn’t call me again?
EBR Team Member: Amor
November 29, 2016 at 1:12 pm
Hi Sangeetha,
so, do you mean he wants you to be sad for him to get back with you?
Etta
November 26, 2016 at 12:44 pm
Hi. My ex of almost four months just broke up with me, because of, according to him, another woman he met during the same event we attended though on different days.
However, during that phone call, he went completely left field by asking me “what is your favorite food” and what is your favorite wine”? Though I answered him, I kept wondering to myself what in the world has those things to do with anything.
Anyway, during our relationship, his mother and I, because I’ve witnessed her controlling, manipulative behavior, had words and now he wants me to mend things between us, which I’m refusing to do. The last I heard from him was past Thursday evening, we talked about it, he asked when am I calling his mother, I gave him an off hand quick answer, he said he wanted me to call that day, I refused, telling him I was going out, getting ready to walk out the door. All of a sudden he barked “WHERE ARE YOU GOING!” I took offense that he has no right by asking ” Why are you questioning me? I never questioned you, etc.” He refuted by saying I never had to because he always told me which is true.
Anyway, the next day Friday, I received 3 calls, no voicemail. One was his mother, at least her name popped up, the other two from him, again no voicemails. I refused to answer all three.
Another thing. The day we broke up, he kept saying how he loves talking to me, he even asked me for my help for computer software. Are u kidding me or what I’m thinking. I feel he should turn to his new girlfriend for help, and if she doesn’t know then go elsewhere.
Yet, I still do love him, and in love with him.
I don’t understand his behavior. Two girlfriends feel he still cares for me. I don’t know.
Thank you.
EBR Team Member: Amor
November 28, 2016 at 11:17 am
Hi Etta,
when did you break up? Do you want to try the no contact rule? I think he’s used to being “controlling” with you..