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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
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Anna
December 9, 2014 at 10:22 pm
Hi, so while reading this I found myself wondering about my own situation and began to smile. Thing is, in the past my ex has blocked me on all forms of contact (full block out) but barely lasted a week, he would always come back into contact.
While recently the roles have reversed, after our last argument 2-3 weeks ago, I was the one who actually fully blocked him. During our argument he flaunted his new ‘rebound relationship’ in my face, though told me he missed me & how he hasn’t replaced me. While the rebound relationship was the last straw for me, I knew he had been checking up on me on social media as he had accidently added me on fb, only then to delete me. A few minutes after he tweeted something in regards to my own tweet. (Yet refused to admit he had been spying).
While till this day I have him blocked on everything, I haven’t caved in on the NC, this weekend would be the third week. I do initially would like to reconnect with him. He has in all means gone through our mutual friends in an attempt. I was thinking about unblocking him after NC. Our relationship didn’t end in the best of matters & he still harbours a lot of anger and hate towards me. Which is initially started NC as I knew time would allow the dust to settle, which is why I refuse to start the whole on/off period again.
I do believe he still has feelings for me, he constantly tries to make me jealous & is going through our mutual friends to check up on me. I know he is still attracted to me as it was one of the reasons why he said we couldn’t ‘just be friends’ there will always be something more there.
Are relationship was about a year and a half long, though we were friends before this for 4 years. And I’ve been best friends with his brother for about 6 years. We hang out in the same social circle. While our relationship was far from perfect I do believe our problems can be resolved.
I’m one for the old fashioned saying ‘if something is broke fix it, don’t just throw it away.’ I guess loyalty really is what it go by. He ended things due to the arguments. Arguments that stemmed from his fear of commitment that I later found out after our first break up.
Why I helped his through his ex (first love cheating on him 3 years ago) I hasn’t realised the full extent of how scared he was of getting hurt again, which he opened up and told me about. I now realise he was indeed a insecure guy, and a relationship will never be smooth with him but I do love him enough to make things work. But by this point our emotions were still high & insecurities brought it down again.
During the end we argued badly, arguing up to sometimes 5 hours through text. We both let our emotions get the better off us and we attacked each other due to hurt. I regret this all, I normally am the one who thinks logically and walks away from the bad. But he is my first love & I never had my emotions over rule me before, something I have learned.
I know he wasn’t the only one who caused problems, and I accept my responsibility for my actions and taking time out has made me see where I’ve gone wrong and learn from them, I just don’t know how to fix this mess.
I do love him, I do care for him but do I need him – no. I just want to correct things and try and start a fresh. He misses me, obviously still cares & finds me attractive but the arguments is what brought us to this. Is there anyway around this?
I apologise for the long message. And why NC is going good, I can start to see I lost myself in the relationship & am getting my old self back. I’ve dated other people & have even gone as far as hooking up with someone else (was very adamant about this idea, but initially it worked wonders. Brought down my stress & made me realise that there were other people out there besides me ex who was attracted in me.) why I’m not actively seeking for a relationship at the moment due to the emotional baggage and knowing it would be for the wrong reasons, I believe in getting my independence back & putting myself first again. Which is why I want to go slow with my ex again & not rush into things like we did in our on/off period.
Start in gaining our friendship back & letting things go from there. The thing I worry about is that what if the time has been & passed and he truly doesn’t want me in his life. While eventually I’ll get over him not wanting to be with me romantically (plenty more fish in the sea) I don’t think I’ll ever truly get over loosing a friend that I cared & spent so much time with. I miss him every day, and why I miss his touch and cuddles I miss just talking to him even more. I hope you see this & are able to shed some insight.
Many thanks
Anna.
admin
December 10, 2014 at 3:35 pm
Well, its kind of up to you to influence him enough after NC to want you in his life.
Anna
December 10, 2014 at 5:09 pm
I was thinking maybe, wishing him a happy Christmas? Or something to get the ball rolling? Have I done the right thing by blocking him? How do I influence him enough to remember the good? One moment he thinks I’m perfect & he doesn’t deserve me the next all he can see is my flaws & that he deserves better?
admin
December 15, 2014 at 5:03 am
Honestly, I would try to come up with something better than that.
krystel
December 9, 2014 at 10:05 pm
hey chris,
what kind of text should we send to our ex boyfriend after the no contact rule
admin
December 10, 2014 at 3:33 pm
Read this site. It’s full of them 🙂
alex
December 9, 2014 at 9:59 pm
Hey chris, muy boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago..we fought and said harsh things to eachother and he decided to end the relationship, he said I didn’t appreciated him, that he was tired of fighting for this relationship and of my attitude. We were together for 2.5 years and a week before de broke up de were like super happy. The first week I was crazy girlfriend trying to get him back, but currently I’m in week 3 of NC. He hasn’t contacted me, but 4 days ago I saw him and he was the one who approached to say hi, he was super nervous and I could tell he was about to cry, then he left. He hasn’t made the effort to contact me in any other way. We broke up a couple of times before,none of us has cheated. He was the type of boyfriend that always came back, he always kept telling me to please never leave him. Can you give me any advice?
Ava
January 9, 2015 at 4:56 am
Has anything happened since then?
admin
December 10, 2014 at 3:33 pm
What are you doing during NC fo ryou?
NC is also about focusing on yourself you know.
mm
December 8, 2014 at 8:17 pm
Hi. Broke up with boyfriend after 2.5 years. We were constantly breaking up and he would always come looking for me. His last time he said he had met someone else and I was calm,showed no emotion when he told me and refused his offer to meet for closure as I knew the intention was to rub it in my face. I still doubt he met someone and think he only said that to hurt me. Anyway wished him well and started no contact. 3 weeks later he drops off a gift I gave him ages ago (had told him when we broke up he can dispose of all gifts) and next day sends a text offering to meet so he can answer my questions (I hadn’t asked any). I ignored,following day he turned up at my house, buzzed doorbell for 30 minutes. I ignored and he could tell I was in. Then sends another text saying he had come to make peace. I responded saying to please not contact me again as I am already at peace with the situation and have no questions. 3 weeks later and total silence from him since that incident. Confused! In my head if he really wanted to talk with me to resolve things he could hAve tried harder. Or maybe he really does have someone and wanted to make peace with me so can’t be bothered after I ignored?
admin
December 9, 2014 at 1:19 pm
What were the breakups usually over?
ym
December 9, 2014 at 3:46 pm
Unresolved trust issues was the main reason (he didn’t trust me as he thought I’d cheated on him). These manifested into constant arguments and anger towards me. He always initiated reconciliation though, not me.
admin
December 10, 2014 at 3:13 pm
What made him think you cheated?
ym
December 9, 2014 at 3:53 pm
Just to add this last time he said some really disrespectful things to me and told him I wanted out for good. A few days later is when he said he wanted to meet “for closure” and then mentioned about this new person he was seeing, how much better she was than me, etc. After that is when I went no contact. I’m puzzled why so keen to meet me for closure if he’s with someone else as he claims. Surely he should be so happy that he doesn’t even think of me if it’s true that he is with someone new!
Shocked
December 8, 2014 at 5:01 pm
Hi my ex n I broke up five days ago after a year of dating . He said he had been thinking about it for two months . Also said he had spoken to his family and friends to ensure he wasn’t making a mistake. He said he had been thinking about it for two months and he just can’t see himself marrying me or even in his future plans. Says that we are two different live to far apart and I have child that he met in sept. And we broke up on dec 3 so doing my math it was right after meeting her that he began to doubt our relationship . He says I was to sure about him and so positive about is and that he was really sorry but he doesn’t feel the same way . I was so shocked I didn’t see this coming at all ! We went from everything was great to him ending it . He said he wanted to be friends n we messaged for two days after we broke up he acted like nothing happend and we never dated . That made me mad so I told him I needed time and space away from him to sort myself out and asked him not to contact me that I would contact hi when I was ready to. Did I do things right by cutting off contact with him it’s been 3 days and he has not contacted me at all. Do you think there is hope of getting him back I truly love this man. Please help
admin
December 9, 2014 at 1:16 pm
How long have you been doing the no contact?
You commented on this page so I am assuming youve done it.
Emily
December 2, 2014 at 5:31 pm
Hi Chris,
My boyfriend broke up with me nearly 6 weeks ago after 6 years together. We are both 24 soon to turn 25.
The breakup came as a total shock to me as we had been happy and just been on an amazing holiday together. When we came back, even or families said they had never heard us talk so positively about a holiday and what a great time we had had.
He just said he didn’t know if he wanted to be with me anymore and was really crying when he told me. I was so shocked I didn’t say much so the next day sent him an email explaining my feelings.
He said he had been feeling unhappy on and off for a year, but I had never noticed this and he said since his dad passed away (3 years ago in January), he had got good at hiding his feelings.
We then met up a week later to talk and it was very sad, we were both crying. Neither of our families or our friends think this is the right thing for us.
We left that meeting upset but clear it was over. He said he would never be with anyone that made him happier than me.
I didn’t speak to him for 4 days after that, until he contacted me to say he had made a huge mistake and regretted it. Said that he knew deep down I was the one he should be with but that his head was all over the place. He said he was sorry and wanted to try again but take it slowly. He took me out for dinner that weekend and bought me roses. We had a lovely evening and didn’t want it to end. He said he was scared of messing up again and I said that he shouldn’t worry about that because at least we would know we had tried.
I should point out that we had a good relationship, with relatively few problems. The toughest thing we had to go through was losing his dad at the age of 54, with both of us only being 22 but we got through that together.
A few days after the dinner, I hadn’t heard from him so sent a message to say thank you for the dinner and flowers. He replied and said sorry he hadn’t been in touch and that he needed to sort out what he was doing with his life before contacting me again because it wasn’t fair to me and that he hoped I understood.
I gave him time and then a week later, bumped into him with his friends. He looked awful, very thin and tired. I said I haven’t heard from you, are we not trying again? And he just said no I don’t think so.
It was a horrible conversation as he was quite cold with me and that’s not like him at all. I left very upset and haven’t heard from him since. That was 10 days ago.
What do I do now?
A few people have mentioned he may be depressed, including his mum but he can’t see that apart from a couple of times when he jokes about it.
I am at a loss to know what to do. I want him back because our relationship was good. He said he loves me and I still love him and I feel that there is a future for us.
I don’t want to pressure him, he knows he can contact me if he needs to but have just heard nothing.
Please help.
admin
December 3, 2014 at 4:50 pm
I think he may be depressed…
I think he needs some time to himself to sort his life out.
Give him that space. Go into NC and work on being the happy person I know you are.
Emily
December 4, 2014 at 8:49 pm
I had to contact him yesterday regarding some money he owed me for our last holiday.
He said that he started feeling differently and couldn’t shake his feelings which is why he ended it. He feels that we met too young. I spoke to his mum yesterday who said she thinks he feels like he missed out as we got together at 19.
Do you think there is anyway back for us? Maybe if I give him space and time?
admin
December 8, 2014 at 12:26 pm
Yes, there is a way back but its not going to happen overnight.
Emily
December 8, 2014 at 1:26 pm
I don’t know what to do next – I miss him so much and I truly believe we are meant to be together. Nobody thinks the breakup was a good idea, not my family or his.
I know from friends that he has been going out a lot lately, with friends 4 years younger than us and he hasn’t seen his family half as much as he used to. He was very close to his eldest sister before and she told me she hasn’t seen him in weeks and the other day he refused to look after his nieces for her.
I never put any restrictions on him when we were together, so going out with his friends is nothing new. He was always able to go out whenever he wanted and often did, without me as I had my own friends. So that aspect hasn’t really changed.
We were so good together and he said he knows he will never be in a relationship as good as ours so why has he done this and what can I do? I am really not coping very well so any advice would be so helpful
Ae
December 1, 2014 at 2:27 pm
Hi. My boyfriend broke up with me few days before our 4th Anniversary. I am actually on Day2 for NC. But I am not quite sure if it will work. I don’t know if he still wants me back. He said that he don’t wany me anymore. Should I give up or should I continue doing this NC and getting him back? Thanks.
S
December 1, 2014 at 2:48 am
Hi Chris
What if your ex is one of those guys who has accepted the break up and is just trying to move on and he knows that contacting me would just elevate my hopes?
And he will only talk once he’s over me and ready to be friends?
Am I being crazy here or do guys like this exist? And if so, how to deal with men like this?
Thanks!
admin
December 1, 2014 at 3:35 pm
Yes, guys like that do exist but I think they are rarer.
Why?
Because most men can’t just be friends with their ex. Eventually old feelings come up. There are some guys that can be but I am skeptical of them even at times.
S
December 1, 2014 at 5:36 pm
Yes, my ex isn’t friends with any of his ex’s. He did want to fix things with me but I think I was too pushy and he just said he can’t get back with me but will be ok to be friends.
So do you think there is a chance he may reconsider and take me back as his girlfriend provided I back off?
Or is he just softening the blow by saying he’ll be friends but has no intention to.
Help me Chris! I really want to make this work and make him see that I can change.
admin
December 2, 2014 at 2:31 pm
I dont think backing off completely will work but I think it will be helpful at this juncture.
S
December 2, 2014 at 6:18 pm
So do you think he is just softening the blow?
And should I make contact after my 30 day NC?
admin
December 3, 2014 at 4:53 pm
You absolutely should.
Amanda
October 29, 2014 at 2:53 am
It has been 15 days since I talked to my ex. We’ve been broken up for about 6 weeks. After a little over a year and a baby, he left me and her.We’ve been fighting since we broke up over emails but the last week he’s emailed me and I’ve ignored him. Bad thing is he’s dating a younger girl who he met less than two weeks after we broke up. His family says he’s better and happier. I’m a mess about the fact he’ll never miss me. I’m trying to move on. I landed an amazing job and I’m doing well. Just lost on what to do or expect. Any advice?
admin
October 29, 2014 at 3:51 pm
How long has he been dating her? 4 weeks?
Nadine
November 20, 2014 at 6:53 pm
I am currently in No Contact phase and last Friday was my ex’s birthday. I had not contacted him in 5 days and did not contact him on his birthday. That day he contacted me through text asking some random question to which I did not respond. The next day he dropped off some flyers for his business on my doorstep. Sunday he asked me if I had received the flyers and I still did not respond. Later that night he texted me if I was just ignoring him. But Monday I broke the NC rule and simply replied that I had received the flyers. He then texted me a sarcastic comment thanking me for wishing him a happy birthday but I did not respond to that comment. He is currently in another relationship to which he entered 3 days after we broke up. I now have to start all over with the NC rule. Did I ruin my chances for breaking NC?
admin
November 24, 2014 at 3:54 pm
No, you just took a small step backwards, try not to fret.
Danielle
October 21, 2014 at 7:06 am
Hi Chris,
I bought your book and have read all your posts, it was extremely helpful and everything made sense.
I broke up with my boyfriend on the first week of july after a little over two years because we were away from each other for 6 weeks prior (we both study in different universities only an hour/two (depending on transport) away from each other and spend most weekends together but his school ended a lot earlier than mine for summer so he came back home to Hong Kong before I did) and in that time I felt like I was being taken for granted because the distance caused us to fight a lot and we had external stresses not due to each other affect us both so we got into fights much more. I still saw the bigger picture and tried to understand he was going through a lot of stress but he didn’t understand that I was too and wasn’t being supportive and instead in the mix of everything said a lot of hurtful things and it was a pretty bad time etc. So I came back and broke up with him I messaged saying I don’t think we should be together anymore but more so hoping to just scare him and discuss it in person and figure out our differences given that we hadn’t met in 6 weeks (he was on a plane to a weekend wedding two days after I got back to HK which is when I had sent the message), he said we’d meet when he got back and I took that as a we’d discuss and figure it out but the next day he asked me if I had told my parents we broke up and I was really confused. Basically I broke up with him not really meaning to and he went along with it not fighting back like he normally would’ve.
We never ended up meeting to talk (i admit i did do a few of the don’t which is possibly why) but we had a lot of run in’s at events/clubs where everything felt the same and how it use to be and clearly both felt an extremely strong connection as well as really sweet exchange of messages. During all of those (except the first week of breakup) I was pretty sensible calm and collected I would say, not making many missteps. He called one night to check if i had reach home safely we talked a little and he said when his friend asked why we weren’t together anymore his answer was “we fought too much and she’s moving away anyways” (and through the convo it was evident that his lack of fighting back or working on fixing us was deterred by me moving countries at the end of summer). I moved countries right after he left to uni.
He left mid aug back to uni and sent a short civil goodbye message after which I came across your website and proceeded to do no contact for 30 days. He never contacted so three weeks ago I finished the nc period and I followed your first message after NC got his attention immediately then responded 40 mins later and received a one worded response. So I left it like suggested for a week and tried again today and to everything I sent (3 back and fourth’s) it was all one worded responses (the convo was regarding the driver whom he always had organise to pick me up when I got back to where I study from the airport to home).
I’m quite confused and don’t know how to proceed anymore. The entire time we were dating he would repeatedly tell me how I was the best thing that ever happened to him, how much he loved being able to call me his girlfriends and how he hopes i never ever leave him and he was always afraid of that. I understand after the break up he was extremely angry and lashed out by not being there for me when i needed him but also know that our bond was still there whenever we’d actually see each other face to face. I thought after going back to uni and a month of my no contact he’d calm down and get over his anger towards me or issues. And that with time he’d start to see what he lost and talk to me. However I go back to uni three weeks ago and with such little progress and his constant one worded response I’m more dumbfounded then ever and am going kind of crazy overthinking everything possible. He obviously can’t have just forgotten about me after so long together and with the intimacy we had reached on all levels especially emotionally but I don’t really know how else to make him tap back into those emotions, its been 3.5 months since the split and i’m rather worried about time running out before it’s too late to get him back. Ive realised with the time apart our fights were petty and based souly on jealously and that our problems are fixable, he set a standard and I’m not interested in any other guy around me as I know i’ve set a very high standard for girls and way surpassed his exs however I deeply worry about the girls he may use to fill the void.
What should I do now and how do you think I can overcome his lack of reciprocation/resistance?
Sarah
October 20, 2014 at 12:18 am
I broke up with my about a 2 ago. I was pushed to do it after a small disagreement that blew up. we had been fighting over petty things for two months before and he said we were on a thin line. Then we got over it a month later and were fine for a couple of weeks then come sunday we get in argument to where i found out he had been wanting to break up during the time period we were the thin line period because of the constant fighting. but he didn’t want to because he loved and cared about me. he kept trying to hold my hand and told me he didn’t want to leave and he just wanted to be happy and that i should just drop it and be happy. But since I was hurt i pushed him away and because of how he was saying all that I was pushed to dump him. Then after he cried and got out the car I tried to reach out and drove up next to him and apologized before driving off and he said no we’re done and he cried and walked away and it hit me. The next morning I was stupid for texting him and saying that i was sorry and taking responsibility for what happened. and though in his messages i can see he was hurt he was agreeing with the break up and said we can never fix our issues (i had some insecurities, and he would get angry and was fed up with the fights). he was short with his answers. we talked for a bit then he stopped responding after i asked for a second opportunity. I responded hours later again asking if he seriously wasn’t going to consider that. SO that test I stopped texting him. I tried. However I feel like complete crap. A part of me thinks its over because of those texts. Even tho I did the break up and he then agreed, I didn’t want to and i completely regret it. I started no contact after that text and I’ve been doing it for a week. i noticed he’s been really quiet, he hasn’t been on anything. We were together for a year and a half but we talked about a future etc. aside from the fights we had a really great relationship This month is also his birthday.
a week and half later he texted me late at night, all he wrote was my name in the text. I didn’t want to text but my friend gave me false hope so i responded with a simple “yeah?” and got no reply. days later all of his photos of us on insta were deleted.
What do I do now? Is there hope of us fixing it.
angelasil
October 14, 2014 at 10:01 pm
I’ve been dating tis guy for quite sometime now.we ave misunderstandings,we break up and make up,we just came back from and 8month break up.when I tried to advice him on things I was longer comfortable with in the relationship like cheating,sneaking out to pick calls and not helping me at al with my little needs as a lady,he got upset with me and blanked out for almost 2weeks.few days ago our paths crossed when I saw him carrying a female on the front car seat he tried to defend himself but ended making it a huge trouble.right now I’m confused and don’t know which step to take.I need your help pls.
jenny
October 14, 2014 at 11:57 am
love the site, but how does a girl get an answer around here?! this is my 3rd post and sent an email…i feel like a site gnat! i need help! 🙁 im going to resend my email…look for an email from jenny please!
admin
October 14, 2014 at 4:09 pm
She sends 3 posts haha.
No jk jk.
Resend the email.
Danielle
October 22, 2014 at 9:19 pm
My comment is still under moderation for the past week 🙁
jenny
October 15, 2014 at 11:58 am
i resent it last night at 10:16pm ET (not sure what time zone you’re in…)
jenny
October 21, 2014 at 11:52 am
…bueller? lol i sent an update saturday 10/18 at 10:26am ET to your email… i know you’re busy, but could really use some advice. ive been following all your posts and think things started to move in a good direction, but miiiight have messed up =/
Rachel
October 14, 2014 at 11:45 am
What if I text him after NC and he doesn’t respond? The message would be to finally forget about him right?
admin
October 14, 2014 at 4:08 pm
No, it just means he is stubborn.
Shasha
October 14, 2014 at 3:13 am
Hi. My ex-boyfriend and I have just broke up recently. He said that he do not want to talk to me anymore. I came to his house and he chase me away and said he do not want me anymore. One of my friends who talked to him about our break-up told me that possibly he broke up with me is because he have feelings towards someone else. Despite that, my ex told me that he have to break up with me for some other reason which I have to keep confidential. It was really a depressing thing I have to go through. However, I feels that our break-up does not affect him badly at all. Usually, if I were to post pictures of me, he will ‘liked.’ But now he did not. Instead he ‘liked’ other girl’s photo. I realised he start to change ever since he went to high college. From there I can see that he turns out to be very bossy and always angry with me.
admin
October 14, 2014 at 4:02 pm
Well, you two are broken up so he probably feels like he can’t like your pictures and if you are doing NC he is probably trying to get a reaction out of you or make you jealous by liking other girls’ photos.
krys
October 13, 2014 at 7:53 pm
My boyfriend and I were high school sweethearts and were together for nearly five years! We broke up on 5th September this year which makes it roughly a month and a week ago. On 8th December would have made it 5 years. He broke up with me because I am a Christian and he is an atheist. I really wanted him to be a Christian I never pressured him though. He broke up with me because he said he’s not the guy I need. He said ‘you want me not need me’. I really want him back he sent me a text though” I will be as direct as I can..we aren’t going to get back together…I believe that is the best thing for u and for me long term…do i still luv n care about u yess…ur a great girl n wish u only the best…that’s y if it’s possible I want u to get closure so u can move on…maybe even some day we can learn to be good friends again… but for us to move on we both need to realize that we aren’t going to be a couple anymore.’ I felt my heart rip at each word. I have him on whatsapp and his statuses are usually how happy he is or how much fun he has with his friends. He seems so happy. I really really want him back. I am in the no contact rite now it’s the 17th day he hasn’t contacted me. I just want back what we had. We didn’t even fight for this to happen…just two days before he broke up with me I was planning to surprise him at his home with his favourite food etc. Is it possible to get him back?! how i will do anything!
Please help! my biggest fear is losing him he was my best friend and my everything. this silent treatment tears me apart each day. what to do? my parents even miss him they love him so much too!
Sarah
October 21, 2014 at 2:21 am
My boyfriend and I broke up in September October also over religious and other reasons we were together for almost five years also. He is the love of my life and best friend. He started drinking and partying and saying he didn’t feel it anymore. He says he doesn’t want a relationship anymore. 🙁 I feel your pain. I am doing no contact but I made a mistake I made my friend call him. 🙁 I think you guys might still have a chance since you didn’t fight a lot.
admin
October 14, 2014 at 3:50 pm
May I ask what caused the breakup?
Was it a fight?
Disagreement?
Difference in religion?
krys
October 15, 2014 at 7:20 pm
just a difference in religion although i never made it an issue he just came one day said he thought about it for a while and decided and not gonna turn back
Jaymes
October 8, 2014 at 2:42 am
Hi,
My situation makes me suffered. My ex girlfriend dumped me last month with the reason of falling in love to another guy who I also knew. She don’t feel like chatting with me and indifferent towards me right now. She told me she deeply in love with that guy. She don’t even reply my text messages right now. So I decided to move on to no contact period. What should I do to win her back from indifferent relation right now?
admin
October 8, 2014 at 1:10 pm
Hi Jaymes,
By any chance have you seen my other website, Ex Girlfriend Recovery?
Jaymes
October 9, 2014 at 1:35 am
Hey,
Can I have the link please? I’m really depressed right now. She told me I’m too good to her and it’s not worth for me to put her at first place.
admin
October 9, 2014 at 1:46 pm
http://www.exgirlfriendrecovery.com
Diana
October 7, 2014 at 6:18 pm
Hey Chris
I am a high school senior and my boyfriend had to leave for college. Around March we discussed about this situation and he thought we should break up because it would not work. Afterwards, for the next whatever months, I kept giving him the same amount of attention (he told me he truly felt loved). During these months I had written a diary in which included everything I felt for him – happiness, love, pain etc. Eventually the inevitable happened and the departure day came. Again, he said he didn’t think it was going to work (i want to mention the fact that he had a long distance relationship before which failed, but he told me i was never like her – he’s very straight forward and sincere). I did not really say anything; he then started getting very emotional..he said he had never been so emotional since he was very young. He got emotional at the airport and when he read my diary for him as well. When I said I loved him, he said he loved me too and that he does not want to forget me. Moreover, he said he hopes I could get over us because “I can do so much better”. I asked for one single chance from him to see if it was going to work and he refused. A few days later I messaged him saying I hoped everything was going well for him and wished him good luck. Lately I have not been doing too well and he was wondering if I was alright. After a couple more days, I messaged him again to see how he was doing. It’s been over a week now and he never messaged me first. I decided to not message him anymore because I already wished him good luck etc. and I would just seem annoying. I really really miss him and I want him to give the relationship a chance. I would give more relevant details, but I don’t want to make it too long.
Any piece of advice on how to make him change his mind would be greatly appreciated.
Diana
October 7, 2014 at 6:16 pm
Hey Chris
I am a high school senior and my boyfriend had to leave for college. Around March we discussed about this situation and he thought we should break up because it would not work. Afterwards, for the next whatever months, I kept giving him the same amount of attention (he told me he truly felt loved). During these months I had written a diary in which included everything I felt for him – happiness, love, pain etc. Eventually the inevitable happened and the departure day came. Again, he said he didn’t think it was going to work (i want to mention the fact that he had a long distance relationship before which failed, but he told me i was never like her – he’s very straight forward and sincere). I did not really say anything; he then started getting very emotional..he said he had never been so emotional since he was very young. He got emotional at the airport and when he read my diary for him as well. When I said I loved him, he said he loved me too and that he does not want to forget me. I asked for one single chance from him to see if it was going to work and he refused. A few days later I messaged him saying I hoped everything was going well for him and wished him good luck. Lately I have not been doing too well and he was wondering if I was alright. After a couple more days, I messaged him again to see how he was doing. It’s been over a week now and he never messaged me first. I decided to not message him anymore because I already wished him good luck etc. and I would just seem annoying. I really really miss him and I want him to give the relationship a chance. I would give more relevant details, but I don’t want to make it too long.
Any piece of advice on how to make him change his mind would be greatly appreciated.
admin
October 8, 2014 at 12:54 pm
How far apart are you guys (since you left for college?)
Diana
October 8, 2014 at 6:51 pm
Also, we’re both still in Europe. His family is also still here.
Diana
October 8, 2014 at 6:46 pm
I’m leaving for college next year, he has already
hema karkare
October 7, 2014 at 2:12 pm
My bf broke up with me 2 weeks ago because I was doubting on him *TOO* much (according to him) with another girl… He was like ” I don’t like u anymore….nd we can never be in a relationship again….nd u have to promise me that we never come back in a relationship again nd just be friends!” I was so much depressed that I ended up texting him too much for the next 3 days…but he paid no attention to my pleading… Soon he started IGNORING me totally! Not even looked at me …. So I started the no contact rule just one and Half week ago …m still worried that will he ever contact me? Have I hurt him too much? What if he ignores me even after no contact period??
Plss help! :'(
admin
October 8, 2014 at 12:38 pm
May I ask what caused you to doubt?
hema karkare
October 8, 2014 at 1:27 pm
I read his chat on facebook with her…. He was flirting with her… When I talked regarding this he just got furious…. :
admin
October 9, 2014 at 1:21 pm
Give me more of an example of how he was flirting?
What was he saying to her?