What Is Your Ex Thinking If They Don't Contact You

157 thoughts on “What Is Your Ex Thinking If They Don’t Contact You”

Roxana

August 12, 2021 at 9:16 am

Hello and thank you for the informative article
The thing is me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 3 years
We loved each other and the relationship was mostly romantic
We were always texting each other and knew every useless detail about the other one’s routine life.
We didn’t fight much. I can say that we had 5-6 major fights during the 3 years we have been together.
But recently we had some issues. He had financial problem (we’re from iran and the economy is a mess) and he was unwilling to ask his parents for financial help whilst in this economical situation of my country it is absoloutley impossible for one to get on his own feet without any help.
On the other hand, I expected that he takes an action to make our relationship move forward; like a proposal and getting engaged. But in our last fight, he declared that he has no intension to marry me altough he told me otherwise before.
In our culture, boyfriends and girlfriends usually doesn’t have sex before marriage. We didn’t have sex either.
He told me that our relationship is nothing because we didn’t have sex. And i told him that i’m tierd of constantly listening to him nagging about financial situation and not proposing or making our relationship a serious thing. And then i broke up with him.
After 3 hours he texted me that he has talked to his father and wants our families to meet each other as a beginnig of making things serious. But i was so mad. I told him that it’s over and got offline and didn’t even open his other texts that night.
Now it has been 9 days. And he hasn’t contacted with me since. And i’m feeling terrible because we used to text and call each other all the time and it’s shocking that he easily moved on during these pasy 9 days.
Now i wanna know, in your opinion as an expert, will he come back to me?
I miss him and the idea of him moving on so fast is driving me crazy.
Btw i’m 26 and he is 28.
Thank you for your time
Shelby

July 29, 2021 at 1:44 am

I liked a woman and we really connected. At the time I was married and I just got caught up in the enjoyment of her company. I lied multiple times to keep seeing her. I know it was wrong she said I hurt and one text said addressing me she said I don’t think you understand how this affected me. I miss and care about her so much I know she may not feel the same. Will I ever hear from her again.
Mk

July 27, 2021 at 1:15 am

So I stopped seeing this guy 3 weeks ago after being needy and clingy and he ended the argument putting the phone down. We haven’t spoken since. He’s not removed me from socials but stopped watching my stories and hasn’t attempted to contact me… it’s day 26 no contact and he is a womaniser is it likely he’s wallowing in his ego currently and just being stubborn?
Laurie

May 13, 2021 at 6:30 pm

My ex and I just broke up 3 weeks ago after a 4 year relationship. The only problem was that they told me that I kept putting them on the back burner. This is the second time this has happened. The first time we got right back together. This time they said they fell out of love with me. ( however will still say they love me if I say it first!). They told me to work on doing things for myself. Plus they want to see consistency from me before we can even talk about US again. Do you think that I still have a chance with my ex? I love this person so very much and want to spend the rest of my life with them.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

May 13, 2021 at 8:28 pm

Hi Laurie, I would say so, but you need to learn how to show that you care without making them feel that they’re not a priority in your life. While a relationship should never be number 1 in your life, you need to show that you can balance all going on in your life. Meanwhile, I would work on the Ungettable information while you stick with NC and then reach out after 21 days as you do not want them feeling that you do not care.

Edward

April 14, 2021 at 7:39 pm

Ex has been using subliminal messages and third party members to tell me all kinds of different scenarios regarding if she wants me to be apart of her life or if she doesnt. Either way is fine with me and ill respect whatever terms she requests I just want her to know that finally realizing our relationship wasn’t what I was tricked into believing it was and even though im very hurt, I can forgive and let go. I do care for this individual and would like her view point on eventually talking and putting the past behind us.
Bill

April 9, 2021 at 6:58 pm

My ex-wife left me for her boss over 2 yrs ago. She has me blocked on everything. she told me 2 or 3 times that she was coming back but always changed her mind. I haven’t seen her or any contact for over a year. The weirdest thing is she kept my last name. If you want to forget some one I would think you would change your last name. On 12/27/19 she called me crying and wanted me to come and get her. I thought thank God she’s finally back. 9 hrs. later she broke my heart again and after to talking on the phone to someone told me she has to leave. Yes, she went back to her boss. After all this time I guess I need a miracle for her to ever be back in my life or even a phone call from her.
Julie Anne Molinas

March 6, 2021 at 8:33 am

Can i still get back my ex boyfriend even our relationship lasted only for 4 months? I had to break up with him because he told me we rather be friends and he doesnt have plan to be with me in the future. We had meaningful relationship even it was short.. we never have big fights and we have same interest. We good together actually.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 24, 2021 at 9:16 pm

Hi Julie yes you can but you need to be sure that you are strict with yourself when following the advice in the articles, starting with NC and working on the Ungettable mindset

FB

March 3, 2021 at 8:47 am

Hi Chris, it’s Fabian from Australia. I’ve purchased products off you in regards to getting me ex back in which I truly love. She broke our 14mth relationship off on 13/02/21 the day before Valentine’s Day. I’ll be honest a week before she broke it off she wanted space and I gave that to her but messed up by going to go and tell her I love her. She then called it off the next day, saying I had codependent, passive aggressive and controlling behaviours in which I know of some instances but I wouldn’t say I’m those , it’s now been 3 weeks now since I have had no contact with her and it is killing me, I still have not heard from her , but by reading you products I have it’s keeping me at bay from reaching out to her. What should I do?

Thanks mate

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 9, 2021 at 10:01 pm

Hi Fabian, its great you have gone into NC and keep going! Make sure you are focusing on yourself and that you are doing things to become the best version of yourself.

Akira

February 27, 2021 at 12:08 pm

My ex and I dated for three years and well we got into a fight last year December and he called it quits. Ever since then I havent been myself. We saw each other recently and we talked. It was almost as if we didn’t break up at all because we still had that chemistry. But then he just suddenly cut me off and when I asked he said he was going to put his feelings for me at bay so that he could focus on himself. Ever since then he hasn’t even tried contacting me. I contact him once a while but I feel like I’m bothering him and so I have implemented the 30 days no contact rule. I really love him so much and I’m scared I might lose him like this. What do I do?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 24, 2021 at 8:18 pm

Hi Akria, if you want to get your ex back and have completed the NC correctly then you need to make sure that you are following Chris’ texting styles to get your ex interested in having conversations with you

Anna

February 16, 2021 at 9:58 pm

Hi I’ve been with my ex for 4 years and we’ve had multiple break ups & always got back together. However this time round we was so close to marriage but then we had an argument and he told me he doesn’t love me and to move on and have a nice life. I’ve been blocked everywhere and have completed the no contact for a month straight. Is it over for good? I really need help!!!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 17, 2021 at 4:13 pm

Hi Anna, I would suggest that you keep going with your No Contact for the time being as you need to do 45 days when you have been blocked by an ex. By then hopefully you are unblocked, if not then you need to keep working the holy trinity and being ungettable. This article about being blocked should help you – https://www.exboyfriend.com/what-to-do-if-your-ex-boyfriend-blocked-you/

Molly

February 10, 2021 at 12:42 am

I was with my boyfriend for six months. He was separated with a kid and a busy schedule with work(we work for the same company in different cities). We had a rough week, I drove down to see him, got in an accident, found out he had cheated(though very small), and stress was a lot. The part for my car took three days to receive, the day he drove me back to pick it up, he broke up with me before he dropped me off. He said ‘he didn’t see the relationship going anywhere’ and that ‘we’re too old to be wasting each other’s time’. He texted me that night to make sure I was home safe. I didn’t reply. He hasn’t contacted me since. I’m blown away.
Cindy

November 11, 2020 at 12:13 am

Mine left without an argument causing it. We were together for 2 years, and we actually fit together pretty nicely. Both of us could be 100% ourselves with each other and we had a mutual respect and a base of friendship. We both said we were the “perfect match” for each other. Then, he decided he didn’t want any strings and wanted to spend time with his kids only (he had lost his wife a few years ago). He said he wished we had met years from now instead. He was very cold to me (unlike him) and said he didn’t want me and didn’t love me anymore. This came as a shock to me because just two days before he had said he loves me so much and was excited for our future together. I was an emotional wreck when he dumped me (wrong thing to do I know). I haven’t heard from him in 2 months and I am still heartbroken and confused. He still has a bunch of things at my house, and I am just confused where to go with this. It isn’t a “typical” break up. I am focusing on myself, but I miss him like crazy… 🙁
TME

November 1, 2020 at 4:42 am

Hello, my ex said he wasn’t in love me after living together almost 2.5 years. However, just 4 months earlier he said he was happy with me. But about 3 months ago while we were arguing, I told him to get out. It is originally my house. Anyway, he told that was the reason he didn’t love me anymore. How is it possible to fall out of love so quickly over something said in anger. Anyway, I left my own house on Oct 6 until he moved out on Oct 28th. We have been in no contact almost a month. He has never asked how I am or even asked our mutual friends how I am. I don’t get it. Also, he is stubborn. But since he broke it off with me, I thought he would have asked how I was doing? I don’t want to reach out to him for fear of more rejection. You advice is appreciated.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 1, 2020 at 11:03 am

Hi TME, so when you argue and tell him to leave that causes a hurt / broken trust feeling that you are going to throw him out every time things get heated between you. Each argument you have as a couple will lessen the love between you both too. He needs a break from the negative feelings that he has from the relationship. This is why No Contact is perfect, even if he is stubborn. When you reach 30 days I would suggest that you reach out with a text from Chris’ articles so that you can start a conversation with him, even if you are worried of rejection, the alternative is wondering “what if”.

Anonymous

October 31, 2020 at 2:02 pm

Hello me and my ex was together for 3 years we broke up about 2 months ago . I spent one of those month & half on no contact rule after the no contact rule for 30 days I reach out to my ex though a text message twice no response! Should I just give up and move on ?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 31, 2020 at 4:13 pm

Hey there, did you attempt to use the texts that Chris suggests in his articles? Or were they generic reach out texts for normal conversation?

Anna

October 28, 2020 at 8:19 am

My ex and I were together for 2.5 years and broke up 3 weeks ago (he broke up with me) and have been in no contact for a little over 2 weeks now. The breakup seemed to come out of nowhere because we truly love eachother and I still believe we do. His reasoning was that he just needs time because his work and Class schedule are about to get hectic and he feels like he can’t juggle everything and he said “I promise I’m not leaving this easily I just need time”. However, The first week of the breakup before no contact we met in person upon my request because of course I panicked. In this meeting he seemed upset and almost angry and mentioned that he felt like I gave up on the relationship, could this statement have been from emotions running high and him trying to place blame? I don’t feel that I gave up but looking back I may have slightly taken him for granted because of being together for a while but I felt as though I was just getting comfortable. I’m planning on continuing with 30 days of no contact because he hasn’t reached out and I’m still working on myself. I know this process of getting him back takes time especially because he asked for time but since he asked for time should I wait for him to reach out to me (and trust he will after he has taken his time that he needs)or should I reach out after 30-45 days? After those 30-45 should I send a text like you mention in your articles or write a letter? I have combed your website to try and make sense of my situation but I feel like I need an opinion on this.
Thank you so much

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 28, 2020 at 10:40 am

Hi Anna, definitely do not write a letter to your ex. Reach out with a text after 30 days NC as things seemed almost calm between you both when you met up. I wouldn’t say that you needed 45 days unless you feel that you need it for your own self work.

Raegan Pulliam

October 26, 2020 at 5:38 pm

My ex and I were together 2 years and we were very in love. In fact if you asked someone while we were dating, anyone would’ve told you that he was very much in love with me and obsessed. Things got difficult so we came to the mutual decision to take some time apart and work on ourselves so we can be better for eachother in the future. He was definitely for it and never once gave me the impression he wasnt! We officially broke up almost 6 months ago. He started dating someone new 1 month after the break up and displayed ALL the rebound signs… I heard that it’s not always a good idea to reach out if someone else is in the picture so I’ve been giving it some time. At the end of November it will have been around 5.2 months since they started dating (the average length a rebound lasts according to you). I’ve been working on bettering myself but he is completely silent, a complete stranger, and I’m realizing more and more everyday how much I love him… Please give me some advice if you’ve read this entire message

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 28, 2020 at 4:31 am

Hi Reagan, so I would suggest that you reach out with a text that Chris suggests and start following the being there method. You mentioned that its not always a good idea. If you want to try and get your ex back, you need to reach out to start that process.

Adrianna

October 20, 2020 at 3:15 am

What if I want to reach out but I’m afraid too? I was so attached to my boyfriend, our split has truly been traumatic for me. We started dating my senior year of high school and broke up after almost 4 years. He started to change a lot towards the end. He always wanted to take hallucinogens, I assume to escape his reality. He never wanted to communicate about feelings. He’d never talk about his and seemed he’d never listen when I spoke about mine. We had a weird experience the last time we saw each other. He decided to not stay with me that night. The next day he left w/o saying bye. He left for 3 days to house sit for his sister. He Text me the entire way home things were going to be okay. He Got to my house and just cut everything after 4 years. No apologies, nothing.. we spoke, he’d made up his mind, said his goodbyes grabbed his bags, left and a week later moved back home (8 hours away) and has never said a word since. I feel shattered. It’s so strange it’s like he was here for a second and then just gone forever. It almost feels like he died. I get anxiety anytime I think of him contacting me and vice versa. I wouldn’t even know what to say. I just feel it’s so strange he could do that. I had truly tried to be the best girlfriend. I actually hate myself for the amount of pain I went through just to make him happy. I feel emotionally exhausted and more disconnected than ever. It’s sad and so weird. I know it’s a long background story thank you for your time! Hoping to get a response!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 28, 2020 at 1:41 am

Hi Adrianna, so if you want to get him back then you are going to have to reach out. That is part of this program, we break the ice for contact after a NC. However, from what you have said above I would suggest that you think about moving on and not reaching out to him at all, you can move on from the pain you went through learning what not to do next time you get into a relationship.

Megan

October 1, 2020 at 3:57 pm

My ex boyfriend broke up with me almost a month ago and we talked a lot afterwards and we did normal couple things but then 2 weeks ago he said we should just be friends, and if there is a possibility of us to get back together we can. And then a few days later he said it’s over between us and we should just be friends. And now he’s acting as if he’s perfectly happy yet he’s going out of his way to do so. Do you think I have a chance with him or should I give up all hope? I still love him very much and idk if he feels the same.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 4, 2020 at 8:57 pm

Hi Megan it is only your choice if you want to give the program a go or not

jordyn

September 15, 2020 at 12:56 am

My ex and I dated for 6 months. It was the best relationship ever, nothing toxic about it. When corona hit, things started to crumble and our own personal issues started to pop up so we mutually agreed to break up. That happened in June and I thought we were taking a break to work on ourselves to get back together but it was a legitimate break up. The last time we spoke in text she told me she wasn’t ruling us out yet she wasn’t thinking about the future too much when I asked if she’d give it a second chance. Three months later and i left a comment on a webinar she was giving; when she saw who left it she started tearing up. I’m glad we’re working on ourselves, but still we haven’t texted each other. Is there hope for the future for us?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 2, 2020 at 8:12 pm

Hey Jordyn, I would say that if you have completed a full 30 days of No Contact then you can start reaching out – hopefully you have been spending some time working on yourself

Rachel L Garey

September 8, 2020 at 7:21 pm

Hi! I broke up with my ex about a month ago. We had been together for 10 months. He always brought up being more serious but would get cold feet a few weeks later, and the last time this happened I said I want to be in a more stable relationship. We left it open and we both said to let each other know if we changed our mind. I texted him after 10 days and asked if he wanted to meet up in a couple weeks. He had said maybe in a few weeks. I said let me know. Well, its been a few weeks now and I still haven’t heard from him.
I’ve been working on myself, keeping busy, and even trying to date a little. I still want him. Do you think he will ever reach out?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 11, 2020 at 8:50 pm

Hey Rachel, we actually suggest that you reach out after your NC is over. You need to read some articles regards to reaching out after NC so you know what to do and plan to get your ex interested in talking to you

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157 thoughts on “What Is Your Ex Thinking If They Don’t Contact You”