What To Do If You Get The Dreaded "No Response" After No Contact

579 thoughts on “What To Do If You Get The Dreaded No Response After No Contact”

Veronica

March 4, 2018 at 10:22 pm

After my ex dumped me by text message I did not call or beg him to take me back. I guess I was more in shock and trying to process what happened and it happening right around the holidays. I remained in no contact for two months and finally contacted him. I was expecting to not receive a response but instead I got a derogatory reply back from him. I was quite surprised as this is the guy who didn’t give me a reason why he dumped me.
April

February 15, 2018 at 9:21 pm

My ex and I broke up after 9 months of being together. According to him he was having a lot of personal problems, he has a had a lot of unsuccessful relationships and felt unaccomplished for a 36 year old man. Felt like a he had wasted a decade of his life. Said that I couldn’t have been more supportive and that he had no problems with me, but that it just wasn’t working anymore and he needed to invest all of his energy on himself. We ended okay, but I cannot deny it has been insanely hard. I had high hopes for the relationship. Anyway, after a while of being separated I texted him to meet up so that we could talk, to which he reply that he wouldn’t mind talking and that he could find some time. I then felt like it had been too soon and apologized for reaching out and decided it was a mistake. Now a month after separation I texted him again that I wanted to talk so that I could give him something. I wrote a letter, kinda a closure thing for me(I am big on letters-he knows that!) but he never responded, so I just let it go. I feel a bit bad, but I also expected this and while I miss him I have ended all communication since. I don’t know if he got the letter, but I also don’t want to push him into this being something that he doesn’t want. Quite frankly I don’t know. It’s even harder when we work together and he is kinda* one of my bosses. We bump in the hallway all the time, never talk and he gives me these sad/longing looks while I just try to ignore him. I feel like I just need to let it go, but then I don’t want to give up on him or at least developing a new relationship now that we have been separated for a while. What can you advice?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 19, 2018 at 1:13 am

Hi April,

check this one:
EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

April

February 15, 2018 at 2:31 am

My boyfriend and I broke up after 9 months. According to him, he was going through a lot of personal hardships, as a 36 year old guy he didn’t feel like he was where he wanted to be in life and he needed to focus all his energy on that. It was incredibly hurtful as I wanted to keep trying, even tho he had been disconnected for a while. We parted pretty well, but its been hard. Harder because we work together and now we bump in the hallway all the time and he gives me sad/longing looks. Thankfully I have gotten a new position and it has been a month since the break up. I texted him a while back and he replied saying he would be okay meeting to talk, but I texted back saying I had made mistake texting him at all as I wasn’t ready to meet. About two weeks ago I texted him again that I wanted to give him something and he never replied. I took that as close to the chapter. I sent him a letter saying a goodby about a week ago (which is what I wanted to give him) and haven’t heard from him. Not sure if I should reach out to him or let it be? Thank you.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 18, 2018 at 11:26 pm

Hi April,

are you doing the nc rule? If yes, then don’t reach out.

Marte

January 20, 2018 at 11:31 am

Hi Amor,

He replied my message. At first he said that he is doing FANTASTIC, living a HAPPY life. It looked like he wanted to hurt me, I stayed cool. The first part of the chat was negative but then it became neutral. Then he wanted to facetime with me. I said it was better to do next week. Now we will facetime next week. I am thinking to wait a few days with contacting again. But it stung me that he said he is living a happy life. Do men say this to hurt their ex girlfriends or do they really mean it? What are your thoughts? I just want to be on good terms with him again but it seems he is blaming me for everything, playing the victim. Is he still hurting?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 21, 2018 at 6:41 am

Hi Marte,

Why do you say he blames you if he’s saying that he’s happy?

Lis

January 17, 2018 at 10:44 pm

Hi again Amor,
I am writing many comments on many articles and seriously I am follow your advise. As you said I waited 30 days and initiated contact again( It makes 60 days n.c total) and no response… I makes 3 contact attempt were failed. I dont want to initiate contact again because I am so tired of beaing ignored. I tried 3 different types of text and it obvious that he has resistence to me and wont break it and he probably thinks that ” she is trying to get me talk to her, so I wont give her this chance, I ‘ll never answer her.” He has deleted my number from his phone after second time I inititated but I wanted to try again and it is failed again so I deleted his number too hoping that he can understand that I wont text him again. I dont know what to do but I ll jus keep posting on social media and wait for him change his mind about the breakup. I dont want to seem like sticky person and needy. If he doesnt reply I should have quit in the first place. It made me cheeky on his eyes and I dont like that situation. I just planing to give up. I love him realy deeply and know that he also has feeling to me. Because in the relationship he was just like me hearttrob and needed attention and love from me. Anyways I kinda sing my heart out 🙂 because 3rd time no reply just made my hope lost. I am really sad and wantto be together again, but he seems that wont give me the chance to show new me. What you are saying? 🙂 I feel like no hope. What do you think? You probably will say keep posting be active. And, which I will. But any other advise to make my days a bit hopefull or there is no hope at all…

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 18, 2018 at 6:54 am

Hi Lis,

Nope, I think it’s time to move on.

Paula

January 17, 2018 at 7:31 pm

Strange, I can’t see my follow ups here. I haven’t texted him yet as I would like to know if its a good idea what I want to send.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 18, 2018 at 5:54 am

a gif is cute, and it’s good to use his favorite woman but don’t use the premise that she’s waiting( to imply that you are) because it’s been days since your last text right? Start a new topic instead.

Paula

January 16, 2018 at 1:11 pm

Hi Amor, thanks for replying. I did reply your question but I can’t find my message here again. So I am writing it again but if my message somehow appears again, then sorry. Ok, I was thinking to send a gif of his favorite woman (like she is waiting a bit) and write: “maybe this is a form of motivation for you ;).. Anyway, I’ve been meaning to tell you something..” .. Do you think this is fine to start with? Will he not think its a way to get his attention?
Paula

January 15, 2018 at 8:18 pm

Well.. I think I could send him a gif of his favorite woman (as a joke that she waited for his reply) and start with this: “Maybe this gif is a form of motivation ;), anyway I’ve been meaning to tell you something..” .. But will he not think it is a way to get his attention?
Paula

January 15, 2018 at 5:50 pm

Oh now I see my message. Sorry

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 15, 2018 at 8:08 pm

Hi Paula,
A most you have three tries.. you can wait a week or two if you want before initiating again. Which of the types of texts above are you most confident that you can send?

Paula

January 15, 2018 at 5:49 pm

I cant find my message. Did I do something wrong? Hm…
Paula

January 15, 2018 at 4:35 pm

Hi 🙂 .. in december we had a big fight because he told me he put down a girl after a period of texting for fun with her but then she asked him to meet. But he told her that he has a girlfriend. I told him that he should not be flirting too much that girls get the idea they can ask him to meet. Somehow he became very angry at me, and I became angry at this angry behavior and we quitted our relationship through a phone call. We never talked again after that. But last week Tuesday (after 32 days no contact) I sent him a friendly text, asking how he was doing and that I thought that our last conversation wasn’t worth the trouble and that I hope we are okay as its possible we ll meet again thru mutual friends. He did not reply my text.. I wonder if I should write him again? I just want us to be okay and on good terms again. But I am afraid, that if I write him again, I look desperate. What is your opinion on this and should I try again and what kind of text?
Sarah

January 7, 2018 at 4:12 am

I was dumped after 6(ish) months of a very intense relationship for reasons I am still not 100% sure of (although I think clinginess/neediness played a big role). He was very amicable about the split, in fact, I could tell it almost pained him to do it. I went into immediate NC (mostly out of pride) but he has reached out several times to say he misses me and still thinks of me. I have responded to these messages with very short/indifferent/non emotional responses such as “thanks” or “you too”. A few days ago, he reached out again to say that he misses me and sent a song this time, which I did not immediately respond to. I finally worked up the courage to text him back today (mind you, this is the first time I’ve initiated any contact in almost 30 days since the breakup). I sent a light hearted/fun message but his response was cold and short. I could tell he didn’t want to keep the conversation going but I sent another short quirky message anyway to try to keep the conversation going and he completely stopped responding at that point. Obviously I’m going back into NC but what is going on here?!?! He feels like it’s ok to reach out to me…but when I do it, he gets freaked out?!

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 9, 2018 at 8:32 pm

Hi Sarah,
It’s hard to say why just on that one instance but this time if he texts you again, don’t reply anything during your nc, not even if it’s just an ok…

Lis

December 23, 2017 at 9:33 pm

Hi Amor,
Am I the only one who write comments under the most of the articles 🙂
Anyways, I did 21days Nc. I was active on posting nearly everyday and improve myself. And after n.c initiated the first contact with a interesting text. He read it but no reply at all. I didnot send any followup texts, ı just wait a week and sent second text like ” you will want to hear the thing that I just see” he read it , but no reply. I am start to move on without moving on because I know that if I keep doing this either he is not going to respose again or he will block me and also I dont want to seen despreate. He is enjoying his life going out with friends posting the pic. everywhere and being happy all the time never alone. Maybe he realised that he is better without me. What do you suggest? This tactic ( sending interesting text) seem doesnt work on him maybe he wants to hear something more or he is test me if I being text gnat again like I used to be in our relationship. Do you thing if I say something like more emotional thing, maybe he starts to break his walls? What do you think? Do I need to catch him with his rest emotions? I know there are alot of questions but I dont have any other hope but you.

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 25, 2017 at 9:13 pm

Hi Lis,

don’t worry a lot of girls do it. I hope you didn’t send an emotional text… I think you need to restart nc, do 30 days, and do more of posts that doesn’t disappear after 24 hours.. if you blocked him, make your posts public.. It looks like he has moved on, so he has to think that by the point you initiate contact again, you’re either moving on or has moved on too and just being friendly because he saw it through your posts.. Don’t say in your first text that you just want to be friends or you’re just being friendly.. just do it, don’t say it..

fudge

December 7, 2017 at 4:00 pm

Hi,

me and my ex broke up from a on and off again relationship of 5/6 years. I done the 30 day rule with no contact even though he messages me once two after just saying ‘ hey you must have blocked me’ and never called or anything to see if it was true which I never.
Over the break I had a really good presepective and its been nearly a month now overall and he never messaged me after the 30 day rule. I would love for us to work on things and i cant believe we have known and loved each other deepply for over half a decade and he has not contacted me at all or wants to try which i thought it would work?
i really miss him and want him in my life and not just because its what i am use to but I really value him and can imagine and would want him to be here for the rest of my life hes that special to me.

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 11, 2017 at 8:47 am

Hi Fudge,

How much did you improve and how active were you in posting during nc?

Faeeqe Tabrizi

November 29, 2017 at 8:12 pm

I don’t know if my reply is here but I’m going to answer you again. Yes I was active. Working out, writing (my dream). New decoration.new friends. I went out with the guy once. Anyway it was 30day of no contact. And because I am from Iran I cannot join your program and your reply here is my only hope

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 30, 2017 at 7:25 pm

That’s good.. You probaby feel that way because you broke up during the honeymoon period.. But try again after a week.. Use a topic of his interest..if he doesn’t reply, either you try one last time after two weeks or move on

Faeeqe Tabrizi

November 29, 2017 at 8:03 pm

Well i was pretty active. I changed the decoration of my house. I started writing again (which is my dream and i am good at it). I went out with my friends. And i post some of them in instagram. I work out every day. I am actually good and breaking up wasn’t really that bad. Because he was a good man and I knew by begging and crying I would make him to someone he doesn’t wanna be. And I didn’t want to be that girl either. But I love him and really miss him and have no idea why he is doing this. Anyway it was 30 day of no contact and I didn’t break it. But it didn’t work I guess:(
Faeeqe Tabrizi

November 29, 2017 at 7:57 am

Hi dear.
My NC period finished the day before yesterday.and I send veri happy text which was included a inside joke and funny story. But he didn’t respond. He didn’t contacted me in NC too. We were dating for a 3 month. And all of a sudden the week before my birthday he said he wanted to be alone! I didn do any crying or anything but after 2 week i text him that we should talk and end it probably but he said no. And i cut the communication since. He has been bankrupt and had a very bad financial crisis. He was silent in social media all the month and not even liking his own friends and family. Anyway we had a very brief but nice 3 month. And I really want him back. But he didn’t answer and i dont know if he will in any future attempt that I do. So what do you think I should do? I had break ups before him but it is the first time that i feel that our story should not be like this. He is worth it. But I guess he doesn’t feel like that and mybe i should let him go?
I am 32 he is 31.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2017 at 3:05 pm

Hi Faeeqe,

How active were you in improving yourself and in posting during nc and now, and how long did you do nc?

rr

November 15, 2017 at 6:51 am

I did NC for 3 months, I contacted her as you suggested and I got neutral response- she was asking about my family and work, and we were texting for in short answer then I ended up immediately. After 3 days I contacted her again by saying how r u ? and she replied is not your business, you dont have the right any more to know how am doing … I ended up the conversation by I just ate something and reminded me about you, and I have the right to asking you because you were the shiny part of my life .. have a good night and pretty life ..

I’m confused what should I do.. got neutral and negative responses at same time?

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 17, 2017 at 7:36 pm

Hi RR,
Wrong kind of texts.. and how much did you improve yourself and how active were you in posting during and after nc?

Help

November 12, 2017 at 8:42 pm

Hey Amor,
I’m not sure why my comments haven’t appeared when I’ve tried to post a follow up. Anyway, this is the guy who wasn’t an ex who asked for space. I sent him that angry text, apologized later, he blocked me from social media, and then I did NC for 21 days. I sent him a congratulatory text in regards to a work related thing and then friend requested him on fb. He didn’t reply to my text and he declined my friend request. I think he is interested in this other girl at the moment. I don’t know what to do. It feels like my “angry text” was unforgivable to him and I miss him a lot.. I expressed in that text how he had hurt me. I feel stuck and unsure about what to do here. I’ve been blocked from snapchat and instagram, and all I seem to have left is iMessage and Facebook messages.. I mean..is this repairable? As I stated before, last time he spoke to me was late September and last time he heard from me was 2 days ago when I texted and friend requested. I also tried to post pictures on my public facebook profile.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 13, 2017 at 1:29 am

Hi,

it’s still here, I just haven’t reached it yet.. Well, you’re not supposed to send a friend request if there’s no rapport, unless you don’t have any way of contacting him than that.. Other than moving on, try nc for one last time and do it for 45 days..

Help

November 12, 2017 at 8:40 pm

Hey Amor,
I’m not sure why my comments haven’t appeared when I’ve tried to post a follow up. Anyway, this is the guy who wasn’t an ex who asked for space. I sent him that angry text, apologized later, he blocked me from social media, and then I did NC for 21 days. I sent him a congratulatory text in regards to a work related thing and then friend requested him on fb. He didn’t reply to my text and he declined my friend request. I think he is interested in this other girl at the moment. I don’t know what to do. It feels like my “angry text” was unforgivable to him and I miss him a lot.. I expressed in that text how he had hurt me. I feel stuck and unsure about what to do here. I’ve been blocked from snapchat and instagram, and all I seem to have left is iMessage and Facebook messages.. I mean..is this repairable? As I stated before, last time he spoke to me was late September and last time he heard from me was 2 days ago when I texted and friend requested. I also tried to post pictures on my public facebook profile.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 13, 2017 at 2:03 am

HI,
They’re all here.. I just haven’t reached them yet.. I’m not sure why they’re disappearing on your end though..
Well, you’re not supposed to send a friend request if there’s no rapport, unless you don’t have any way of contacting him than that.. Other than moving on, try nc for one last time and do it for 45 days..

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579 thoughts on “What To Do If You Get The Dreaded No Response After No Contact”