132 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Boyfriend Says He Wants A Break”

1. 

   Jasmine

   November 30, 2018 at 9:33 pm

   So, my boyfriend (I guess now ex) asked for a break a few weeks ago, to “be happy by himself,” and to “re-balance himself.” I was/am completely for him trying to be able to make himself happy when we’re not together, but told me he loves me so much after he told all this to me. This was a total shock for me because things between us had been very good and we hadn’t had any issues recently. Now I have never been on a break and in these last few weeks I’ve been doing the exact opposite of what was recommended in the article. I usually leave him alone to do whatever he needs to do unless he messages me, and then we’ll have full on conversations where he’ll flirt and act like everything is normal, or comes to see me while in between classes at college, where things are pleasant but I don’t know how to act so it feels awkward. We also hooked up once recently, which was very confusing to me and I asked him for answers about that and made him angry. Is it too late to begin these strategies? What would you recommend I do?

2. 

   Lola

   September 22, 2018 at 11:08 am

   Please leave the b****d, I once felt this way too. Go find u someone who appreciates u that sees u as a flower he has to water everyday.that loves u to the brim and that respects your feelings.Dont keep hanging there. U would only be doing worse things to yourself .

3. 

   Cala

   March 9, 2018 at 11:05 pm

   Not sure where to leave this comment, but say for instance that everything is going smoothly in no contact phase (he split with me because he says he doesn’t love me anymore but literally everything else points at him just being afraid to commit to trying again when we were so on and off before (my own fault). I’ve been doing great on bettering myself the last 3 weeks, but I heard from our mutual friend that he suddenly wants to get girls but he had told me that he didn’t want to date period for a while. I’m not sure if this is how he’s actually felt (which makes me angry because he acted like he didn’t want to date period before and now does aka not me) or if he’s saying this to act nonchalant about our split. I was his first girlfriend, we dated nearly 2 whole years, and he only has 1 friend (who’s coincidentally my best guy friend). How can I take my mind off this, ideally I’d just try to clarify it but no contact is going on so I’m not down to break that, especially if it makes him think about our past and failed ship. What can I do?

1. 

   EBR Team Member: Amor

   March 13, 2018 at 4:41 pm

   Hi Cala,

   what do you mean that you want to clarify it? You want to ask him if he wants to date other girls? If yes, don’t ask it, ever..

4. 

   anna

   March 9, 2018 at 7:27 pm

   My guy cannot live without me. He says he wants me in his life forever… loves being with me. He wants to have fun together AND HAVE ME IN HIS LIFE FOREVER . But he does not want to call it dating. He has even insinuated that he wants to still continue with me IF HE FINDS SOMEONE ELSE to have a relationship with. He actually thought this would be flattering!! He bounces between I love you… I dont want a relationship… I want FWB… I want you always. I AM SO ANGRY with him. We DO have fun together. I just wanted to do that I didnt even REQUIRE a full blown forever commitment just open future options! Anyway I told him this was unacceptable to me. And I have cut him off. I just wonder… will he regret me? Will he wake up and see sense or is he just the emotional idiot I think he is. I ADORED this man. And we are perfect together for fun and sex. I cannot imagine what else he could be looking for. We have been doing this for 8 YEARS on and off. Did I do something wrong? I am prepared to get over it. I think it will take a looooong time. I am so angry. At him at myself. Thoughts?????

5. 

   Nicole

   March 7, 2018 at 1:40 am

   Hi, I just wanted to get this out of my system so here goes nothing.

   I’m 10 days into NC, hoping I’d move on soon and improve myself. We broke up over 2 months ago, though he only said he wanted to take a break, take off our BF/GF status and see what happens in the future. I was devastated, I wanted to keep doing what we used to.
   After that, I started noticing he was getting close to one of our friends, TOO close that I started to panic, so I told him about it. He told me why, and kept saying I was just overthinking. I tried opening up to him once about my jealousy, he just replied with, “I don’t know what to say.”

   Last new year’s, I saw he was playing a game with her and didn’t invite me like he used to when we started dating, I immediately assumed he no longer cared for me and wanted to be with her instead. So I snapped, then it ended up with him telling me something like, “Let’s not try to fix this anymore, but I want us to stay friends.”

   I tried NC before but failed, I just couldn’t get him out of my mind. Now he’s just trying to make small talks with me, but still I kept thinking “He’s giving his whole life to this girl while I’m being left alone.”

   Another factor that is making NC really hard for me is we’re classmates, we have to meet four days a week. And him talking and spending most of his time withe her is making me crazy. I just want him back, and I’m trying my best not to talk to him but instead answer whatever he asks and just nod my head if he says something unimportant.
   It doesn’t seem like he’s missing me at all, just small talk about his hamsters or something else, nothing about our relationship or what he’s been up to.

   I just hope I can get through NC, do something for myself, and get rid of my negative thoughts and emotions. I just want to stop crying every single day, I want to stop overthinking. But I want to know if he’s looking for a relationship with this girl (he once said when we started dating 2 years ago that he didn’t have any feelings for her, and that he loved me, I’m just bummed he wouldn’t say the same anymore).

   At this point I just don’t want to see the both of them. I want them gone. I’ve read a lot of articles in this website, I hoping I can move on.
   Should I continue NC? Or just tell him everything I want to say? I have an overseas trip in June and I’ll be there for a month. Should I wait for that time to do NC? I just can’t handle being the third wheel right now. It’s killing me.