What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You On (The Phone, Facebook, WhatsApp, Etc)

2,564 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You”

Marcia

June 15, 2019 at 10:34 pm

Dear Chris,

it’s now 5 weeks since I was unblocked by my ex (oh yeah) and I haven’t reached out to him. Neither did him. So I did well with my NC 🙂 Also I want to congratulate you, as you are the only mentor whose theory caught and worked from the root, for me!

I am thinking to initiate now and see if I may build up just friendly contact with him. I decided I don’t want a boyfriend in my life, but would be rather happy with a pen pal. At this stage I won’t mind even to hear about his current dates etc. That’s what buddies do, right? I won’t play with his heart.

Is it a good idea to try to build just friendly contact with an ex? Or will I look like a time-waster, in a man’s eyes? And if he wants more, I will explain to him that I am happier to be just email friends. There is fun in that too. Do you believe in keeping an ex as a pen pal friend? Life is weird! 🙂

Chris Seiter

June 15, 2019 at 10:46 pm

Sometimes what seems like a good idea in the mind, doesn’t always play so well in practice. My concern is you will get hurt if you are his pen pal and he is telling you about his dates. Not sure that is the path you want to take.

Annette

June 11, 2019 at 11:51 pm

I appreciate your honesty. It seems you are growing and maturing. Not there yet, but promising. The article helped me to see things from a better perspective. Thank you
Marcia

June 7, 2019 at 10:12 pm

Dear Chris, Marcia here, to make your day, just like you make our days (of all your readers and followers) happier! I’ve watched your video, where you and Jennifer both talk, and you are indeed such a cute and charming couple! Actually I can tell that you are so suited to each other and still in love with each other! How amazing and bravo!! 🙂

By taking the test “how likely am I to get my ex back” I got slightly above average. So that’s hopeful, but after being ignored, then blocked, then unblocked, I no longer care about my ex.

If however I do implement your powerful strategies, I am sure I will get him back, to begin with. If I do that as an experiment, and not out of genuinely being interested in him, is that a sin? Would it count as game playing? Because I am thinking to get him back, then drop him, just to teach him a lesson and help him form a better attitude to women. Just wondering 🙂

Chris Seiter

June 8, 2019 at 1:48 am

I would not advice getting him back just to drop him. You will end up hurting yourself in the long run.

Paige117

June 6, 2019 at 8:51 pm

Hey Chris! I love all the information you’ve given! It’s helped me understand a lot. However I do have a few questions. My ex and I have been on and off for 4 years. We both love each other a lot and would do anything. We decided we both needed to work on ourselves in order to have a happy functioning relationship. We both wanted to one day end back up together. But for now to only be friends. He’s dealt with PTSD and I have as well. We were two broken people trying to make it work. He’s blocked me before but that was because I freaked out and ttexted him that his new girlfriend looked like jimmy nutrons dad! (Old cartoon I watched as a kid) which she indeed did resemble him! But I was so furious because at this time we were in between the on and off stages. We were friends but friends with benifits and trying to make it work. So long story short he blocked me. They broke up, and he started talking to me again. Well this time he blocked me completely. I moved to Florida to take care of my grandmother and we decided this was the perfect time to finally focus on ourselves and become the person we’d wanna date. We’ll be dropped me off at the airport. Anxiety and tension was high on both ends. I was known for never being on time and he was freaking out saying if I were responsible I’d of made my flight. I missed it but he said he wasn’t coming back because he had plans and I’d have to figure it out. We’re we’re fine after that day. Talked and texted quite frequently. Then about 2 or 3 months in I was completely blocked in alll aspects. I went into panic mode. I’ve tried contacting him numerous of times. And still find myself wanting to reach out. I’ve become so fixated on him not wanting me because he’s always loved and wanted me. We both had our share of our wrongs. More so me. I know I messed up and was given more chances then I should have been. But he’s never stopped loving me. And I’m so scared that he’s gone forever. I’m moved back. 2 more months and it’ll be a year since he dropped me off at the airport and kissed me goodbye. I haven’t been with anyone. Believe me I’ve tried. I’ve went on 1 date. Hated every minute of it. I haven’t been intimate with anyone but him. I’ve tried tinder but delete it more then I find myself using it. I just wanna forget about him, I try and he’s there in the back of my mind. Every. Damn. Day. My heart aches for his presence. For a call. Anything. I just wanna know why or what I did for him to completely vanish on the earth as I know it. I mean here I am reaching out to a total stranger to try and find some closure to this madness. Whether we become lovers again or just friends I’d be happy either way. He’s made a huge impact on my life. In a good way. Taught me a lot about myself and life. Things my parents should have but never did. Early on in our relationship I resented him for this. And now all I wanna do is thank him and give him back the love he’s given me. I don’t wanna trick him into loving me again or play any game to try to get him back. I want him to comeback because he wants me in his life. I’ve been focusing on myself and bettering myself the best I can while dealing with this. I’m just so scared I pushed him so far away that come my 85th birthday I’ll blow out my candles still wishing for him. I want to know if he’s gone for good. I want to just ask him why. Thank you for your time reading this longgggg sad comment. If you have any advice for me I’d appreciate it!
texasgirl123

June 3, 2019 at 3:41 am

Hey Chris,
I’m not sure how many of these you are able to get to, but I hope you can offer me some insight. I was with my ex for 4 years. We were high school sweethearts and continued our relationship into college. Now, we will both be graduating college next year. Our relationship became rocky when we had to go long distance. I was beginning nursing school in a different town and he was pursuing his degree at another university. During our first semester apart, it was quite difficult. Both our workloads were extremely heavy and the rigor of both programs was so stressful. Time passes, and on my finals week he comes to me and ends our relationship. His reason being, he needs to be on his own and make his own decisions and that I was too controlling. As you can imagine, I was extremely hurt. A month has passed now since we have been broken up. We were still texting, however it was more so me pleading to fix things. We even met up a few times and I explained how much I love him and how willing I am to work on our issues because I truly believe that things could be better. In my mind, after being with someone 4 years there is a level of respect and I thought at least giving it a chance would be realistic. He constantly kept saying “move on”, “don’t wait for me”, “I’ll always love and care for you but I don’t think I’m in love with you anymore” Anyways, my pleading has pushed him away. He has blocked me via phone. I reached out through his brother because I understand that blocking me was needed in order to give us both an emotional break, but I did not want to leave it on a negative note. He responded to me through his brothers phone and said that he felt that blocking me was necessary for us both to heal and feel better and that he will unblock me when he feels the time is right. I guess what I am asking you is, do you think I’m stupid for having hope that we can fix our relationship? Or am I better off moving on and not even considering that as a possibility? I do love him with all my heart and I can’t blame him for wanting to be alone but I just am not sure what to do from here. Thank you for your great articles, they give me a lot of insight.

Chris Seiter

June 3, 2019 at 3:25 pm

Hi Texas Girl….so sometimes the best medicine is No Contact. It can help in many ways…help you with your healing and recovery and also help create the space that is needed for him to perhaps see things differently and come to better appreciate your value. That is what my Program is about (EBR PRO).

Belle

June 2, 2019 at 4:55 pm

Hi Chris, I’ve been waiting for your reply before I make a do something stupid like text this guy that I miss him,

But it’s almost been 2 month since I asked you what I should do. But I’ll tell you how everything started.

This perfect guy came out of the blue and he was too good to be true, he was just like me but, a male version kinda. Then it got little annoying when he texted and starred to ask a lot. I took some break from him but he came back. And I was still little annoyed by him. Cuz he cared to much about me. And then I became mean to him for no reason, I don’t really know why or how I could be so rude. So I blocked him for few weeks. And then started to give other guys some chance cuz I feel like I never give guys much chance to talk to me. After around 3 weeks I unblocked him and he to added me right away. And I felt so bad it was like he have been waiting for me to unblock him, like everyday, cause the moment I unblocked him, he added me.

But I though I’m gonna be nice to him from now on cuz I missed him little. But then he ignores me and he blocks me for three days. I tried to ad him back cuz I though this behavior is so ridiculous and maybe we can be friends , but he didn’t add me back I don’t know if he was it or something so I deleted him after few hours, But I really like him cause he was such a good guy, I just didn’t saw it then, and I feel so bad. I’ve been crying my heart out since then. I don’t know why I act like this.

I have never been in love or even liked some one this much.. I don’t know if I should let it go or try to talk to him? Cuz everything was my fault in the beginning. I mean I got so much attention from other guys I just though this guy is nothing. I was so mean to him.
Jojo

June 1, 2019 at 1:56 am

Hi Chris! Love your website. So I was together with my ex since last Christmas. And these past 6 months has been amazing for us and I knew he always cared and took care of me always. We’ve been to so many trips together and all. But the issue was that we’re always fighting. Mainly it was my fault cause I had depression and tend to push him away when I’m sad or hurt cause I didn’t want to burden him. We met just 3 weeks ago and everything was lovey dovey and suddenly we had this fight again and as days passed by I pushed him away more and I feel he’s been distancing from me. My close friends tried contacting him to ask what was wrong and he told them that he was hurt that I kept pushing him away and he said he needed time to “fix himself”. So I gave him space for about a week and we met up again. But this time he looked different and I started crying n begging him to come back but he said he couldn’t and I was so so hurt. He kept insisting to be “friends” cause he think we could understand each other better that way. And I asked him what’s the possibility of getting back together if we were to stay friends? He said “90%”. So I agreed to be his friend but few days later I found out from his colleague that he’s been starting to see someone from his work. I don’t understand? Just after 2 weeks of being all lovey dovey, he found someone else?!! So of course I spiralled and for one whole week I been begging him to give me a chance. And yesterday when I asked if I could meet him next week, he blocked me on WhatsApp. I was so so upset. That same night I found out he blocked me on Instagram too. I wasn’t sure if his new gf was there that time and told him to do so. But thankfully he did not block me on Facebook yet. So I really don’t understand:
1) how could he just break up with me so fast ?
2) how can he find someone new just after a week of break up? Does he really love her?
3) why did he block me on Instagram? Now how am I gonna show him that I can be happy? Is he gonna unblock me back soon?

I really miss him and want him back but I’m not sure how and what’s going in his mind right now. Sigh. But the best part is that I’m going to see him in July as we booked our holiday tickets with our group of friends. (Which is exactly 1 month from now and it’s best to try the NC Rule) but when we meet, should I start pouring out my feelings to him and confront him ? I just want to win him back!!

Chris Seiter

June 1, 2019 at 3:57 am

Thanks Jo Jo! I am glad you are enjoying the site! So it seems NC would be the right medicine. Sometimes guys will go chasing after foolish notions. Time and space can be a teacher in many ways for you both.

Marcia

May 31, 2019 at 10:34 pm

Dear Chris,

20 days after being unblocked, and he still hasn’t contacted me 🙁

I am being strong, posting about my career projects on fb but without my picture, as I want to shock him suddenly, having lost 6 kgr! But now I have a sad feeling he will never contact me. Although he had blocked and unblocked me again in the past and was always flakey. Maybe he never felt emotional attraction for me… I thought men fall in love gradually, and that’s why I kept it going on for 2 years, but maybe I am wrong. If he had indeed felt any connection, he would have run back to me by now. He seemed a sensitive soul before, but now he looks so cruel. I don’t understand it…
Maya

May 29, 2019 at 4:32 am

Hi Chris! I’m Maya from Philippines. Me and my ex been together for almost 6 yrs. Our relationship was great. We even have a same tattoo. We always talk about our future. I am very insecure person. My ex didn’t post anything about us. Thou his family knows me. I usually stayed in their house every weekend. One day. I don’t know but I texted him I think he has another girl. He got really angry at me. I tried to talked to him but he doesnt want too. He blocked me on everything. As In everything. It’s always 3 weeks now since the breakup. But I went to their house last week. But he is soo angry and doesn’t want to see me anymore. What would I do. I love him. Should I fight for him or give up??pls help me
Latisha

May 28, 2019 at 4:13 pm

Hi Chris,

this was a good read hopefully you can give me some advice. my ex and i broke up well be blocked me on EVERYTHING but whatsapp. I went into panic mode and messaged him crazy on the first day and he was really cold and was like you should know what you’ve done wrong and its not my place to tell you (hes nearly 30) by the end of the day i told him i’d give him his space and will contact him in a couple of days once hes calmed down (think 10 days). but before this all happened i spent the morning with him at a football game and within 22 minutes i was blocked from what i understand i 2 missed a calls. he said i disrespected him and he doesn’t deal with disrespect but ive missed many calls in the past we both work full time jobs and have hobbies so naturally i cant be available 100% is there any saving this
Ellie

May 23, 2019 at 11:16 am

Hi my name is Ellie from the uk I’m new to this and I just need some help with the ex boyfriend situation it all started out fine we were getting along okay having a laugh and then a come Christmas time last year it started to go abit wrong he started to act funny and not wanted to meet he would always say I’m busy or what ever to me I felt like he was advoiding me and then all of sudden he goes and blokes me with out a reason he never told me why he just went and block me he did this on WhatsApp and Facebook, Instagram not to mention my actual phone number see all I wanted to do was find out why he block me I mean no man should not block you with a reason it silly and the fact that i can’t talk to him it hurts me because he left me in this mess to clear up so all I’m saying is how can I tell my ex to talk me about it his situation and why he did it.

Chris Seiter

May 23, 2019 at 11:55 pm

Hi Ellie form UK! So blocking is sort of a childish reaction, though sometimes people will block to protect themselves. What matters going forward is that you have a sensible ex recovery plan. I can help with that. Feel free to check out my Program (EBR Pro Bundle)!

Marcia

May 19, 2019 at 10:33 pm

Dear Chris,

As you so wisely predicted, I am now unblocked, a full week has past and weirdly, no message from him.

I am puzzled. Why would an ex unblock you on messenger, if he doesn’t plan to message you! Another big mystery for me 🙂

Chris Seiter

May 19, 2019 at 11:17 pm

Hey Marcia….so guys can do things for tactical reasons to thaw things out. Maybe he is inching up to a time where he will entertain some communications.

Ughoh

May 18, 2019 at 1:23 pm

Hi.
So my ex and I broke up end of February because he was annoyed about me making a
Comment about him doing
Things for his ex who had hurt him so deeply.
We kept in contact and every time we saw one another we still had intense chemistry, it started turning into fwb which made me feel crap as I wanted a real relationship with him.
He said he needed time for himself before committing again as he was still messed up, but then I found out he was on a dating
Site “looking for a relationship” I never contact him, I always leave that to him and he would text and call me every day…after a few days of thinking I decided I need to go into no contact. He asked why I was ignoring him on the first day, I text him and told him how I feel about fwb and that I need to take time not speaking to him or seeing him, so I can get over him, once I’ve done that, I hope we can continue our
Much valued friendship without physical/emotional attraction and enjoy that friendship again. He never replied then 3 days later he blocked me from Facebook and Instagram. I’ve carried on no contact for 2 weeks so far, I’ve been doing things for me and I’ve been on dates with 2 different guys, but I still can’t stop thinking about my
Ex. We are both in our 40’s and I’ve never connected with someone so well in my
Life….I really miss him. Do you think the ‘no
Contact’ will work in this situation and since I can’t contact him apart from email should I leave it open so he eventually (might) contact me and go from there? I’ve read a lot of your stuff but I’m kind of stumped with this one. I really don’t want to lose him from my life for good but I’m in love and I need that real relationship from him reciprocated. Thanks!

Chris Seiter

May 18, 2019 at 11:08 pm

Implementing No Contact can accomplish a lot. It is one of the success factors for my clients. You can take a deeper dive into learning how it all works by picking up my EBR Pro Bundle.

Ann

May 16, 2019 at 2:25 pm

Hi Chris,

My boyfriend and I had a rough/distant week and at the end of the week, Friday we got into a bad fight and in the heat of the moment he told me to leave and move out of his house. That Sunday he went on a trip for work and since Monday I have been blocked on whatsapp, the app we use to comunicate when he is traveling or home. I havent tried to get in touch with him in a different way and have my days im doing OK but sometimes I freak out and want to know how he is doing, he never send me a message letting me know he arrived well! He has blocked me before on whatsapp and after a while unblocked me without asking him (and comunicating via email). I think he blocked me out of revenge/to get back to me, but Im not sure. Next week wednesday he is back from his trip.

I want to stay in NC as much as I can as long as I can because i think he should be the one to re-initiate contact (specially because he kicked me out of his house), but my broken car is parked at his place. I can survive without it for a while but would like to get it back as soon as I know I can repair it….What should I do??

Chris Seiter

May 16, 2019 at 9:52 pm

Hi Ann….its good that you want to carry thru with your NC plan. There are many elements to an effective no contact period…things you can do to heal and recovery and things you can do to reinforce you value and seek personal growth. Feel free to explore my site for its resources.

Aria

May 12, 2019 at 4:50 pm

Hey,
So I had a fight with my bf in which at the end i cried. My bf hates when a person crys so basically he just screamed at me the whole ride back home to shut up which made me even cry more. he was just really aggressive and by the end he even got violent towards me. The next day i wrote him how he was and he didnt replied so i kept writing him he than got so annoyed that he blocked me. the following day he unblocked me and i wrote him again which was a mistake so he blocked me again. I dont know what to do. I really think that he was the one who misstreated me and the fact that he was violent is not acceptable for me. but he still acts like I am the bad person and he does not even consider to apolagize to me.
Should i block him to? and how should i act when i see him because of the sports we are doing i see him quite often

Chris Seiter

May 13, 2019 at 3:32 pm

Hi Aria…I am not a fan of blocking, but its best to have a sensible ex recovery plan. Check out my Program I call, EBR Pro Bundle as it has an array of resources aimed at helping you out!

Marcia

May 10, 2019 at 7:52 pm

Hi Chris Seiter! I must say, you are a Prince! You are a man’s mind reader! How did you know? Just 3 days after you said “blockers turn to unblockers”, I got unblocked! After 3 months of being blocked and punished. It is unbelievable! I won’t react of course. Following your advice and rules. I am thinking to even tell him a little white lie, that I got a boyfriend, if he reaches out first! So he has to wait until I am free again one day, haha.

May I please ask your opinion on age gaps? Let’s say you had a twin brother, who was 30, and I had the looks and age of Sofia Vergara (47) and loved him with all my heart. Would you encourage him to start a relationship with me? My pastor had said age is just a number, and love is a reaction of the heart, not of the brain. But what do you think? Is logic superior? 🙂

Chris Seiter

May 10, 2019 at 10:22 pm

I agree with your pastor. Age is so far on the bottom of the list when it comes to having a lasting connection with someone else, unless the gap is huge and even then, plenty of people make it work.

Sarah

May 9, 2019 at 3:18 am

Hi Chris,

Please help!

We have known each other for a year and half, in the beginning, it was romantic relationship but only last for 2 months. Then he asked me to be friend as he enjoyed the time with me. So, we were friends, occasionally text or meet up, sometimes at my house having dinner and snuggling together watch movie, or even had a few kisses. But no physical, because we were under the cap of “friends”. I did not date anyone else, he did (on dating sites) but he told me that he is not ready for relationship as he cannot get over his previous marriage as it was quite hurt. I understand that and I did not push him, did not have the talk. But we were at friends stage for a year, he offered me to stay over his house while I was going through a tough time. Then that got me thinking I had to have the talk to clarify things with him.

Then last week, we met up and talked about it, I made myself really clear that I have the expectation to have a relationship with him. He was suggesting me to keep my options open. The talk didn’t go well, he said we will carry on the talk, but we didn’t. So, this Tuesday, I sent him a text to close things, and he replied and then blocked me.

Sorry I have to put the original texts here as I think that matters when you judge what was the reason he blocked me. This is what I sent to him:

“I thought a lot. one year and half, I still remember that not to hot summer morning, you were in your casual suit and glasses standing in front a [place] looking at me, that was the first time we met…been a while…now I am writing this to you, feel like a dream.
In the past I was holding my feelings to myself, pretending to be a friend, pretending not care, justifying your behavior thinking you like me…I am tired. So i think it’s time to let you go and be myself. I understand you are not ready, maybe when you are, I am still around or not.
Hopefully everything will just work out on its own pattern and in a good way.
Loved you. Take care. xx”

He replied:
“I wish you all the best and your life turns out to me a fairy tale. I am a broken person almost beyond repairs. And at this stage I dont want to fix it. I become selfish in someways and lazy with my feelings and scared to attach to someone.
You are an awesome person with so much love to give, intelligent, great mum, adventurous, just a nice genuine person.
I will miss talking to you and when I do and know I have missed an opportunity to have a good life with someone who loves me as who I am.
I wish you all the best and I will me you.”

Then 3 minutes later, he sent “I will need to disappear for good to protect my feelings and close off from things, so dont take it personally.”

Then he blocked me on Whatsapp. I dont know if he blocked me on phone, I am scared to check. He does not have other social media.

I like him a lot, even I can put up with him with someone else as long as he talks to me, doesn’t ignore me, care about me. But I cannot feel that he cares about me. That’s why I decided to end it. But not end it like this. I wanted the time apart so maybe he could miss me and realise I am the right one.

Really, please help, will he unblock me, my gut feeling is not. I think he had enough with me, am I right?

He is 47 years, one marriage, 2 kids. I am 38, one marriage, 1 kid, if this background info helps.

Many thanks Chris, please help!

Chris Seiter

May 9, 2019 at 9:22 pm

I can see you have been thru a lot. Sometimes what’s best is to have some extend time and space apart and use this time to not only realize some of the healing and recovery you so much deserve, but also employ it as a period of reflection…just as he too will need to reflect on what is meaningful in his life. Take a look at my Program “EBR Pro” for more details.

Marcia

May 6, 2019 at 7:37 pm

Just wondering! Did any girl get unblocked? And if so, when did it happen?

My ex keeps me blocked on messenger for a 3rd month, so I don’t think he will ever unblock me there. So I wonder. This is a partial block.

Why did he put an eternal partial block? Why didn’t he put a full block instead? In my case, if I know I am done, then I will put a full block. Is there any logic in a man’s mind? 🙂

Chris Seiter

May 6, 2019 at 10:33 pm

Hi Marcia….it is not unusual for blockers to later turn into unblockers. He probably wants to keep his options open.

Marcia

May 1, 2019 at 10:40 pm

Hi Chris,
Just reviewing my situation, merely for statistic purposes….
So I was on “ignore messages” for 1 month. Then I was on block on messenger for 1 month. So I did NC to him for a month as well. Then I decided to look superior than him, so I sent a happy Easter card on messenger. Although I am blocked, I think he gets notified “there is a chat request from a person you blocked”. So he will know I tried to message him, or he may even be able to secretely view the e-card.

I hate being still blocked. No way do I want such a jerk into my life. He is very spoilt as he is good looking. But obviously, he lacks greatly in the heart department. So I don’t understand. If he got a new gf, seeing what a jerk he is, she would have adandoned him in 2 months tops. No girl will stand such rude behavior. So, why isn’t he coming back? My exes always, always, always, came back. I quess I can’t stand this one breaking the rule. Blocking was the wrong way to make a woman want to fall again into the trap of ” friend with benefits”. If he blocked me for that reason, he failed. Now even if he unblocked me and returned with a ring, I will tell him we can be friends but nothing more. Blocking has killed any feelings I had. Finally, blocking is poisonous. It creates emotional death.
Anna

May 1, 2019 at 9:29 am

I was hoping you could provide some insight. Five years ago, I met the guy who instantly made my heart stop. He made me too nervous and I shortly started working somewhere else-yet always had a crush. He’d come in from time to time -his friend was our new manager. Right before I quit that job, I initiated a conversation and friend requested him that night. He messaged and finally asked me out. We were inseparable for five months, met his mom and grandma at the fair, he wanted me to meet his dad at dinner, FaceTimed his sister, met his close friends. After harboring a five year crush, I was dating my dream guy and fell in love. I asked him on three different occasions if he was seeing anyone else (gave him an out and he always said no). We never had the talk, but his friends called me his girlfriend and he himself did As well. I worked up the courage to confess my feelings and made him a book and the last page said, I’m in love with you. I left it for him at his house on a Friday. He went radio silent until Monday where I got a single text: I’d be lying if I said I was in love with you, I’m so sorry I hope you understand.
Three weeks later he and some girl 12 years younger than him traveled to a different city and check in on Facebook. Three weeks after that, there were Facebook official. Shortly after, he blocked me on social media.
I sent one angry text letting him know I didn’t think he was a good person but other than that, I’ve been NC.
What are your thoughts?

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2,564 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You”