What To Expect When You Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back- Ex Boyfriend Recovery

179 thoughts on “What To Expect When You Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

Mary

January 20, 2014 at 4:12 pm

Hey Chis I followed your guide to get my ex back, I mande my best and everything, started great eh was happy that I texted him after the NC, but slowly he came more distant, finally I get to the step where I’d ask for a get together, and he just cancelled two times, I really dont know What happend. Ha ve been 3 months since he broke with me and we dated for almost 3. Can You give me a pice of advice or a posible explanation? Thanks

admin

January 20, 2014 at 7:58 pm

He seems like he got cold feet about seeing you.
Leah

January 26, 2014 at 9:56 am

If he got cold feet about seeing her – how does this impact the trajectory of “ex recovery”? Is is still possible? How to improve the likelihood of it happening? Or is it a “game over”. Thx!
Mary

February 2, 2014 at 9:28 pm

I screw it, I told him that I missed him and that maybe We should have a second chance and he is ignoring me again, should I make NC rule again or just leave it for good?
Mary

January 25, 2014 at 3:57 am

Yeah ! Tank You for your años wear, there is anythinh that I can do about it? This week I asked him about how he felt about the relatioship and he toldme that he was very happy and that I have been very special with him ( Excuse me for This but WTF?)

Can You explain This pelease or any advice THANK YOU 🙂

anonymous

January 20, 2014 at 3:21 pm

Nice guide chris! I’m still working on getting my ex back but i must say that i’m always looking forward to your new guides. It’s amazing how much effort and time you put into them 🙂

admin

January 20, 2014 at 7:51 pm

Thanks!

Any ideas on what I should write about next?
anonymous

January 21, 2014 at 1:54 am

Hmmm. How about how to make your exboyfriend commit to you? The dos and donts. Since after nc, your exboyfriend maybe dating a few ladies at one go. Or what is going through the male’s mind after nc. Esp if he knows his exgirlfriend wants him back (after she did nc on him) , but he’s treating it casually and insist on being friends first.

I bet there’s numerous of times where your exgirlfriend would want you back, and you know it; probably the signs she gave are obvious.
anonymous

January 21, 2014 at 2:15 pm

To put it this way. When a lady reaches out to her ex boyfriend after she did nc on him, and with her attempts to create the emotional connection with him using memory texts etc. Obviously he should eventually guessed she wants him back right? Men cant be that clueless. Haha. I personally wont bother to contact any of my other exboyfriends after nc if i wont want them back. so maybe a guide on what is going through the man’s mind when he knows his ex girlfriend is trying to win his heart again?

Annie

January 20, 2014 at 3:55 am

Hi Chris,

I love this post, it’s so true that we need advice before the problem occurs. Sometimes I wish I had read your website before the broke up. Anyway, thank you for all the writing and your Ebook as well, it really helps me a lot even though things still not going well with my case but I still have hope for it.

So after my 30 days of NC, following your Ebook guide, I texted my ex but he acted cold with short response. I waited about another 2 weeks to text him again and he still reply with short answers too. I ended both conversations 1st.

I’m kinda confuse of what should I do now. Is it because he still mad at me?

Should I wait a little longer then text him again? (I can be very patient, I just don’t know when should I text him again). Honestly, his cold manner hurts me, feel like I’m disturbing him.

Thank you Chris, looking forward to read your next article 🙂

admin

January 20, 2014 at 7:23 pm

Yea wait a little bit longer.

Confused

January 19, 2014 at 8:28 pm

Hey Chris,

while I completely see how NC can really help someone get their ex to come around, I am a little confused…I know men like “the chase”, so when a woman does NC, but he DOESN’T contact her in that time, isn’t her initiating a text chasing HIM? Which could turn him off? I’m just curious if the chances of a guy wanting his ex back are very strong if he doesnt try to get her back after a month of not speaking…

admin

January 20, 2014 at 12:56 am

Imagine this for a moment.

You text me out of the blue.

I respond (b/c I am happy you texted.)

Then you don’t respond anymore.

All of a sudden I am thinking “WTF? Why did she text me? I wanted to talk to her.”

You want that to happen b/c it will make him realize how much you mean to him.

Diana

January 19, 2014 at 3:56 pm

We broke up 2 months ago after 4 months of dating. He was very nice about it and I took it well (to his face) and stopped contacting him immediately. We do work together so when I see him I’m perfectly happy and polite (the fact that we work together put a strain on us, admittedly). He’s texted me a few times and had brought up old jokes, but I have not initiated contact to him at all. I also try to keep stuff strictly professional and don’t talk about my personal life with him anymore, and I can sometimes see him itching for info on what’s going on with me lately.

He heard through people at work that I’d been out sick for a week, so he called (I didn’t answer) and left a message. I texted him back an hour later saying yes, I’ve been sick. He showed up at my door with soup and other food that he knows I like. He didn’t stay long, although we chatted about work stuff for a little bit. He gave me a hug and said he knows it sucks being sick and being by yourself. A little while later I texted him saying thanks again for the food, that was very sweet.

Is he just being a nice guy, or could he be trying to win me back? Worried about being friendzoned…

admin

January 20, 2014 at 12:52 am

Does he respond to every one of your text messages?
Diana

January 20, 2014 at 1:08 am

Yes, he does. Sometimes I respond back but I always leave it with him hanging. When he responds it’s not one word replies, he’s pretty engaged.

Claire

January 19, 2014 at 12:00 pm

Hi Chris
As you may have guessed my ex and I broke up in November. We’d been seeing each other for 6 months and everything was good generally He was a little closed off emotionally and couldn’t really talk about feelings and stuff but that didn’t matter to me so much as actions speak louder than words and I’m not so great at talking about that stuff either. He had had a series if misfortunes and had to work ridiculous hours. Id already said a month prior to the split that I thought it would be hard on him juggling everything and did he want to end it. And I was told I was being silly. Then a month later he didn’t text me. I over reacted and went ballistic.They went from anger to sadness and back again. I waited a day between texts. He finally replied saying he wasn’t good enough for me yada yada yada. He sent this at 2:00 in the morning so must have been giving it a lot of thought. Since then I’ve not texted much. Once every couple of weeks wishing him well. Not asking for a reunion or anything. Just to say hope things are working out and I miss him. I think my NO time should be much longer as we’re a lot older than your average poster (40) and reserved Brits. He had issues, his mother passed away when he was younger and left him with a really neglectful father, he was going through a messy break up with his wife (kids and custody was involved) I worried I was the rebound girl. Perhaps I should move on but find it really hard as we both really got on, have the same interests etc he’s just so lovely, the sex was incredible (best ever!!) people who saw us said we were the perfect match. It’s such a damn shame it didn’t work out. Advice would be great thanks. Just think a 90 NO may allow him time to get over his ex more thoroughly (he said he was. But I’m not so sure) and I don’t think he is looking to replace me as yet. What do you think? X

admin

January 20, 2014 at 12:49 am

Guys tend to move on a bit faster than women but it still can take some time.

I think it should be a bit longer but not too much longer.
Claire

January 21, 2014 at 9:51 pm

Hmmmm yeah maybe. He was at a really low eb lack of funds car stolen. He’s not looking to move on at the moment. Think he needs time to sort his stuff out. Thanks for the advice your site is really interesting. Wish I’d seen it before I got so over emotional :/ oh well hope I didn’t blow it. If I did well I’ve learned for next time. But at the mo just miss him like crazy. I have to let him miss me I guess.
Claire

January 19, 2014 at 12:06 pm

I should add that apart from a couple of texts early on I’ve not had a reply. I sent a letter saying I respected his decision and I just wish he could of said or text goodbye properly. But got nothing back. I’ve sent happy Christmas and new year. Nothing. I’ve not done anything to warrant this. We never even had an argument before the split.

Anonymous

January 18, 2014 at 10:45 pm

*hugs* because Tyrion is so cool xD

admin

January 19, 2014 at 11:12 pm

YESSSSSSS

OMG OMG OMG Big virtual hug for you 🙂

k94

January 18, 2014 at 1:16 pm

This guide in particular is such a good idea! Its a really big part of the ex-boyfriend recovery puzzle. Puts a lot into perspective, genius.

admin

January 19, 2014 at 11:13 pm

Why thank you!

Actually you can thank one of the readers for suggesting it!

Do you have any suggested article topics?
k94

January 21, 2014 at 2:43 am

I tried to brainstorm some ideas but nothing ‘revolutionary’ came up. I’m sure I will think of something and let you know, in the mean time I messaged you some ‘food for thought’ on your facebook page, just notions and things I have came across that could possibly inspire your research.

Things I have noted past this hour of thinking about it (I make notes ALL THE TIME) is:

‘Recognizing a man ready for a relationship’.
Us women think we want to get this guy back because WE’RE ready. But what about them… their emotional maturity, mental maturity. No matter how perfect we act or follow the rules, if the guy doesn’t want to be in a ‘relationship’, he won’t necessarily want you never mind anyone else….or would he?

Maybe, an article on The paradox of male behaviour.
My ex is very good at being ‘cold’ and ‘distant’ when we’re apart and communicate via text. But when he’s with me he’s the first to be affectionate and smitten.
(and vice versa example of behaviour) However, you have touched on how ‘what a man says and what a man does is different – actions speak louder than words’, but maybe advice to get around this? or how to handle it. – Make him chase you I suppose is the answer and there’s a guide already for that.

but maybe an insightful ‘Translating of behaviours’, what does it mean when he does text you; boredom? thinking about you?
(we know what texts to send to HIM. but how to decode the texts they send to us? is he trying to reconnect with us through text and we’re completely missing it?) – but i have a feeling something similar was covered.
But also them kissing you. What does this insinuate? love? desperation? reconciliation? or just an attempt for friends with benefits?
Is it ever ok to hook up with an ex?

which brings me to…..

‘Things that Women over-think that don’t need to be over-thought of’

Or, another article regarding to the aftermath (getting back together) Perhaps you are dealing with a boyfriend with a low self-esteem. How do we tackle and help our guy when he suffers from these common male stigmas?

I’m sure these have already been touched on, but if it triggers any sort of inspiration for anything then great.
admin

January 21, 2014 at 6:08 pm

I had two ideas actually…

1. What to do if your ex doesn’t contact you during NC.
2. Something on how men view womens looks.
Claire

January 21, 2014 at 10:05 pm

Yeah number one sounds good. I’m in two minds about this either a) they feel guilty and don’t want to deal with it. Or b) they really did have feelings, and for some reason can’t deal with them. So cut you off. If they aren’t telling you to go away(this is before I stoped contact. And just about once a week sent a friendly text wishing him well) does this mean they’re keeping the door slightly open or is that wish full thinking on my part? Also as to all the self improvement stuff you mention, what about (as I have been told many times by people and hate to say it and sound a big head, just being honest) but what about if the guy feels you’re out of his league? That you could do better? How do you deal with that????
Noelle

January 23, 2014 at 9:34 pm

Please do what if your ex doesn’t contact you during no contact !!! I have about 12 days left and haven’t heard !! Love the site !
k94

January 22, 2014 at 11:41 pm

THERE’S TOO MUCH TO COVER ABOUT MEN. This guide would have to be filled with a million articles and there will be something a guy does that we’d need explain.
Heres another guide idea: ‘stop figuring out the ex and become a lesbian’

Chris, an article of why he hasnt contacted during NC might be interesting, but it seems a lot like there really anything we can do about a guy not contacting us? Its almost like having an article to ‘how to make him care’ or ‘how to make him actually respond regularly’. It feels helpless. Unless you’re God and can take away their free will.
And how men view women’s looks its majorly broad. But boils down to good boobs or a good ass or the jackpot of both?

Claire, the ex does that to me too. they keep the door open and even hint that “one day” they’d want to start something eith you. But the second it seems like you take them up on that offer, they run away until they’re ready for contact again. what SHOULD happen, is…if a guy keeps leaving a door open a jar, because they dont want to fully lose us then quite honestly if we want more they should either have the balls to open it fully or we can slam the door shut for them and make up their mind instead of lingering outside. Because the half open door thing just is just their cowardly way of saying “you’re familiar…and i dont want to lose my safety boat….but im also too much of a coward to commit to you”

And you know, as well, with the ‘he thinks you’re out of his league thing’.

MAYBE, he does care. And maybe you are out of his league in his mind, but maybe he’s just caught up in feeling inadequate, which makes him angry, which then makes him want to prove he doesnt need you, which then reminds him he probably does miss you – and thats too vulnerable for him to acknowledge, and all of those feelings that come from thinking about you and just you makes him too afraid to get into a relationship again. Its over-powering.
So…if its over powering i suppose its easier for them to keep their distance, but god forbid they lose you completely.

Its basically their way of regaining control when they had none in the relationship. (just throwing that out there)
k94

January 22, 2014 at 11:46 pm

LIGHTBULB MOMENT!!!
WHAT ABOUT….
How to use a guy’s traits, interests and behaviours to your own advantage.
admin

January 24, 2014 at 4:32 am

Not bad! I am writing that one down so I can remember it.
k94

January 25, 2014 at 9:52 am

I have another…
How about one on how a guy distinguishes between a friendship with a girl vs a romantic relationship. That argument of can guys really JUST see some girls as friends and how does that work.
admin

January 27, 2014 at 6:52 pm

That is an interesting idea.

abby

January 18, 2014 at 6:10 am

‘I care for you’… a BIG AWWWWW for you, Chris.. 😀 thank you! you made me blushed.. 🙂 love the guides!

admin

January 19, 2014 at 11:16 pm

🙂

Decided to turn on the charm a bit!

What did you think of this one?
abby

January 20, 2014 at 1:45 pm

this guides is just like what you’ve said. to cover the guides before it. and i love it tho because its you who typed it. and i trust you about this. 🙂 i don’t know what else i can say. i just enjoyed and studied everything that you’ve gave to us. its very valuable, reasonable and useful. 🙂 i always being the loyal reader just to let you know that i support you. indeed you are going upward. GO CHRIS!
admin

January 20, 2014 at 7:49 pm

Thank you!

I will definitely be doing my best to write more and more for you.

Sabrina

January 18, 2014 at 4:05 am

New guide thanks chris! I hope you will still continue writing new guides, how about a guide to know if shes the one that got away? Sounds like the ungettable huh

admin

January 19, 2014 at 11:16 pm

I will always write new guides as long as you guys demand them.

Do you think you can be more specific for me? Like exactly what you want to know about “the one that got away?”
Leah

January 26, 2014 at 9:59 am

Maybe a guide to what a guys opinion is on the one who got away? And why would they think that why? What would classify an ex as the one who got away and why do guys not try to get back together with them? And a stretch — what are the signs that you might be the one who got away or how they act towards an ex they still care about?

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179 thoughts on “What To Expect When You Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back”