You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed... I'm Here To Fix That

923 thoughts on “You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed… I’m Here To Fix That”

Carol

December 7, 2016 at 10:18 pm

Hi! My ex boyfried of 2 years and 5 months broke up with me last week. He told me that he didnt love and want me anymore. That he can’t see his future with me and that I am immature. That it was hard maintaining the happiness between us. And now he has a new girl and that girl was the one he cheated me with. Is it possible that the girl is just a rebound? Things are going fast with them. They barely knew each other. I know my ex bf. He doesnt believe that he could just fall in love with a person that he barely knew and barely met though they have thes constant video chat and sms and phone calls. My ex bf told me in the past that he cant really say that he is in love with the person if that person and he are not going out personally. They are in a Long distance relationship. I begged for him to come back and he told me that he wont come back. But then I beeged and begged and told him that I would do everything for him just for him to come back with me. Then he told me to come back after 3 months. He said after 3 months I could come back and he could accept me. Should I believe him? Is there an assurance that he would leave the girl?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 11, 2016 at 6:44 pm

Hi Carol,

I don’t think you should believe him and it looks like a grass is greener case. Check this:
The Grass is Greener Syndrome For Ex Boyfriends

Pam

November 28, 2016 at 12:32 pm

Me and my ex boyfriend had broken up years back with him deciding to leave abrupt.. Al through the time I tried. For 7 years. Off and on tried meeting him.staying back . He gave in for off relationship trial last one year plus as per my constant request and everything was fine and still he decided we can’t make it a relationship back.. since June again i begged for looking at our relationship giving it one chance as relation for we lost it he left it years back and I do know it’s worth the giving in.. only that he hv to feel to see it.. he denied.. finally he told he is engaged and wat wil that girl do. I asked him i never left .. he told his parents asked and he gave in and it’s his life. I dno if its lie like the many things he told in past to stop me from asking him to try. I wish it is. Defently as he know me .. it did hit me hard. Dno were to grab courage and try for this. I believe in working things rather than walking out and he knows it.. I dno why he left me in first place years back and now. Without even giving us a chance he giving in to any other girl that too marriage I wish it’s a big fat lie.. coz whichever other things worst things he told before I t didn work with me.. I kept trying calmly aswelll aggressive smtyms asking my ppl to speak to him..

For past one month I’m silent. Assuming he changed his number ..coz he had told so. And he doesn’t seem online. I was full out blocked. I cn mail him i guess. Hvn tried yet since a month. Wana do things well and make it work this time.. it’s not about being with a guy. It’s about this guy who loved me so much that years too couldnt fade it .nor felt ny interest on anyone else..all I felt was we had to hv another chance together as a couple.which I asked throughout past 7 years and he denied. He tried so so last 1 year and getting confused he told and left I don’t want to hear from u again. We had it all crazy times happy times. As I could I did it alll.eventhough we live in different states I tried all I can.

Do you think he jus put his trump card to make me stop trying like emotional stuff.

I wish to try.. want to feel a silver lining in the cloud.. jus so hit which am suspecting is wat he intended..

Do you think he lied. Do u think I hv an opportunity still and make it work.. I’m full blocked as to wat I’m knowing at the moment.. wana do it right this time.. he knows al these years all I loved was him.and we did hv a relation which is worth him staying back for me still
Could

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 29, 2016 at 1:16 pm

Hi Pam,

It looks like he just wants you to move on..

LM

November 26, 2016 at 2:16 pm

Ex boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years and we have a beautiful three-year-old daughter. I caught him cheating a few months back and we tried living separate but still working it out. He was telling me how he missed me and loved our family. Then out of the blue he ended things. He said he’s been miserable for a long time now and that we fight all the time. He wants to work on himself and be free for a while. I’m devastated I’ve begged and cried. I’m trying to be a good mom to my daughter but I’m so depressed all the time. He gets disgusted with me. He says I’m weak and pathetic. That I used to be somebody worthwhile. Now all I do is cry and complain. He also criticizes my body because it’s not as small as it was before I had a child. I was a zero when I got pregnant I’m a size 6 now it’s not like I gained a huge amount of weight. I don’t know what to do it seems like no matter how much I beg he has no interest in trying to be a family again.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 28, 2016 at 11:21 am

Hi LM,

we don’t advise going back to an abusive person but even if you get him back or not, you have to stop begging. Start healing and improving slowly. If your daughter is in the same situation, how would like her to be?

Denay

November 18, 2016 at 9:19 pm

Hi, so i dated this guy dated for like 6 months and randomly he stopped talking to me as much and i tried talking to him about it a couple times but he’d go right back to it so we started arguing and we decided to take a break that lasted a little over a week he came back and was still doing it so i tried to talk to him about it and he just started to stop contacting me less and lees so i blew up his phone (a mistake i know) and he replied to my messages but totally ignored what i said and id bring it back up. so he just stopped communicating with me all together but again a little over a week later like he’s always done he left for over a week and then comes back like nothing’s wrong but this time he says he’s sorry so i texted him and apologize for the way i acted and he texted me back but he just acted like i never said sorry and nothing ever was wrong and then randomly stopped replying. that was almost 2 weeks ago and he hasnt tried to communicate with me since unless you want to count the stuff he sent me on SC. but he hasn’t sent me anything at all in about 5 days and i haven’t sent him anything in about a week because i’m trying out the no contact rule. but what if during this no contact he doesn’t try to contact me? does that mean that texting him isn’t worth it or should i still do it? and anything else you think i should know.

EBR Team Member: Amor

November 21, 2016 at 2:26 pm

Hi Denay

are you in a long distance relationship? You mean he’s ghosting you because you always argue? If you’re in no contact, you should be improving yourself and making a new routine. If he contacts you during no contact, you cant answer..unless he says he wants you back..if he doesnt contact you, it’s your decision if you want to initiate and it’s ok if you want to. Use the nc to reflect on your decision

mel

October 23, 2016 at 11:37 am

My ex finally call it quits due to me being jealous towards his business partner and ex wife. I was the one who broke up with him, then I told him I want him back, he took me back , but things were never the same. He would got upset for simple things and blame me for it. we have been going back an fourth, 2 weeks ago I got mad and lash out at him because his ex wife and business partner is in love with him and also kept on calling his phone. I got upset and ended it. I once again begged to get back he kept on saying no, went to his house 2 nights ago. He kissed me hugged me and later drop me off to work. Later that day I called him, he said i do not want a relationship with you, got a lot going on in my life. I drove off to his house after he hanged up. Asked him time to talk he refuse, slammed the door in my face. His friend was present when all this happened. One more thing the ex wife car was present. I asked him if he has company he said no.

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 25, 2016 at 10:14 am

Hi Mel

did he lie because he knew you would get angry? whenever his wife calls does he treat her in a business way only or in a sweet way?

Chrissy

October 20, 2016 at 8:50 pm

On day 2 of NC & i am miserable. My ex is a stubborn guy who is always busy and burys his head in the sand with problems. After begging for a few days, i was acting jealous & paranoid to. we split i text him everyday for 10 days, sometimes just casual messages. Now im worried ive blown it. Just before i tried NC with him he was very blunt n cold with me. Im worried NC won’t work & he will be happy without me as he appears atm. So so hard he dosen’t have FB either only twitter so its hard for me to show myself having fun etc xxx

Chrissy

October 22, 2016 at 7:48 pm

I can’t see the list you mean??
EBR Team Member: Amor

October 23, 2016 at 8:26 pm

Oh sorry! I meant the ways of dating yourself.. have you come up of what you want others make you feel or what you just want to feel in general, what activities you might want to do with somebody else, that you can actually do on your own or just try on your own for a change..it’s from the podcast of Veronica grant..The one I linked in your first comment.. 🙂
EBR Team Member: Amor

October 22, 2016 at 3:43 pm

what about the list Veronica advised, have you done it?

Krystal

October 20, 2016 at 9:45 am

My relationship was long distance. Like… VERY long distance… He broke up with me saying he loves me as a friend now, but we both loved each other and were in a very loving relationship. He not only acted like it, but told me so. We were best friends and later started dating. I will be trying several tactics that I can incorporate from this article as well as a few others I have read. He actually initiated a conversation with me today, but its hard to prevent myself from going overboard with emotions whenever he says anything. I’ll continue with the no contact rule and behavior change. I’ll try my best to keep my EMOTIONS under control and keep working towards my goals. It makes me feel so much better just knowing I may have a second chance. I’ll be sure to keep score. So, thanks!
Maria

October 20, 2016 at 4:50 am

Hi! So my bf broke up with me 2 months ago bc we were having some fights over stupid things (and he had a very nasty divorce and is scared of drama). During the relationship he always told me he loved me, he was crazy about me and I made him so happy, so that’s what I kind of hold onto to try to get another chance (and yes, I begged…) . We met last week and i told him all i feel and that i wanted him back and he said he’ll think about it, but he then said he didn’t think it was a good idea to get back together and that i deserve a man that loves me and it’s crazy about me (i thought that was him…). Idk what to do, i think it’s clear i need to move on but im so sad and love him so much :(( please help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 21, 2016 at 9:22 pm

Hi Maria,
how long were together? are you going to try the advice above?

Chrissy

October 16, 2016 at 9:38 pm

Hey! I begged for my boyfriend back, we split over1 week ago & was ok but now have begged for him back wishing i didnt. I love the advice here & am going to implement the no contact rule as i have been going out of my mind, also starting a fitness n diet regime. What things would u suggest as another side? I work full time & am an indoor girl – he is the opposite!! Also i cant afford to buy the book what can we do to make sure he does contact me as it was hanging a bit at the end there… our situation is a bit more complicated as he has an 8 yr old daughter who i got along amazingly with he jst didn’t want to commit now im wishing for him bk!

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 18, 2016 at 12:12 pm

Hi Chrissy,

There’s no sure way that he will contact you, the best you can do to show that you have your own life now.. check this too:
EBR 060: “Dating Yourself” During No Contact With Veronica Grant

Donnie Leal

October 16, 2016 at 3:31 am

My ex is a narcissistic issues we’ve broken up about 100 times in 35 years ,I’ve always took him back having four children, he always hurts me abuses me before he leaves again I got hurt, be side of what he did he is making me beg him, now after texting no contact when I tell him to come back I broke it off a d tonight after reading your article decided to join a Texas Holden and have fun enjoy the moment of freedom his lost and my gain don’t care to text or call him your right sometime the Lord takes ppl out of our lives to protect us and I just texted th st earlier to him after being abuse all my life by this person the Lord set me free, Why would I keep throwing my freedom away to be played a fool now he gets the power taken from him and back to me , there issue is there God higher then anyone so IIm taken the power back .can’t wait to read your books thank you I’ll go out gracefully. there games and why get your heart broken 101 times I no it’s crazy, Then they tell the world your begging, And what’s so funny is that when we started darting we were selling vacuums and he sold none I sold a lot, so yes I’m free as a butterfly and will start flying doing thinks and he can go on doing what he pleases .
niti desai

October 12, 2016 at 6:15 pm

I hav an bf.due to some reasons v broke off.n in that anger he decided to get engaged to some other girl n i started pleading n begging.but he was stubborn.i couldnt forget him.then he told me one day i will break this engagement.but unfortunately aftr 2 months of his engagement his mom died of cancer.so je couldnt break up with his fiance.now his dad wants him to get married to her.but we are still in contact.and he still gives me hope of breaking with her and not doing it so.so i got an idea n tild him to make jealous that even i got fixed up with some guy and i am getting married to him.now he pleaded me to break off with him coz hes gonna marry me.i tild him after sone time that i broke off with my fiance.but nw i guess hes trying to take advantage of me and always torturing me by asking all questions related to my fiance and my relationship with him.hes not breaking up with his fiance.his dad wants him to get married by next month.what should i do to get him back????please suggest quickly i dont have much time.i really dont knw how to behave.please suggest

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 13, 2016 at 10:12 am

Hi Niti,

are you really engaged to another man or you just said that to him? Do you want to try doing the no contact rule? You have to set a time limit on until when you wait because obviously he looks like he’s just making you wait for nothing

Jessica

October 2, 2016 at 3:49 pm

Hey I have a ex, and he would say that I would always yell and him and make him feel like everything is his fault and like he is always wrong and never did anything for me. So he broke up with me after a big arguement. Then i tried to get him back by talking to him and i begged him to come back. But he kept saying I’m sorry I dont feel the same way anymore I mobed on. He likes a girl but is not with her but he is trying to be with her. But I love him and want him back so I begged him and he brought my past relationship up with him. And now I still want him and I am trying to get him back but i really love him and can’t ignore him with the no contact rule. What do I do I need help on getting my first love back!

EBR Team Member: Amor

October 5, 2016 at 10:44 am

Hi Jessica,
just like in the advice above,we dont have any other advice than to do it.. if you’re not going to do the no contact rule, what else do you have in mind? Are you going to keep on chasing him?

Emma

September 28, 2016 at 11:54 pm

I was finding this article really helpful until it got to the part that heavily relied on the assumption that we actually have access and regular contact with our exes which i’m guessing for most people is not the case. ‘Number of dates he initiated…’ please don’t distress us further by saying ridiculous things like this. If he was initiating dates/phone calls we wouldn’t be scouring the internet for advice would we??

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 30, 2016 at 5:56 pm

Hi Emma,

Why? What happened between you and your ex? Did he block you?

Stefany

September 18, 2016 at 4:08 pm

He dumped me 3 days ago because I was being overly emotional. I broke down and texted him the next day asking if he really wanted to end things forever. Then I sent another text asking if he was ok (because he was sick). He replied the last text saying that he was feeling better and thanked me for asking. But he ignored the message about if he was really ready to end things. I really wanted him to confirm it and say yes or no so I’ll know to move on. What should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 18, 2016 at 8:27 pm

Hi,

He already said he doesn’t want to be together, so I think he just doesn’t want to keep reiterating things because maybe he’s getting annoyed about it. Maybe he was just busy when wasn’t capable of responding faster..
Are you going to try what’s advised above?

Minakshi

September 15, 2016 at 3:25 pm

I broke up with my boyfriend almost five months ago due to my depression related issues and I felt that he doesn’t care enough, even though he did. For a few weeks he kept sending me short texts but I didn’t respond well (I’m such an idiot!). Finally he stopped trying, blocked me on Facebook. All this while I had been hoping that he would come back to me (I know I’m too egotistical). A week ago I started getting more depressed and texted him that I’m not able to get over him. And then he told me about his new girlfriend. I was devastated. I mean I destroyed everything with my own hands. I wish I had responded and made up with him all those months ago. I may have even somewhat begged him. What should I do now? Is there any chance? He seems pretty serious about the new girl, too because he clearly said that he’s over me and loves that girl and with time I’ll be able to move on as well. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 18, 2016 at 2:03 pm

HI Minakshi,

are you going to therapy now? And do you want to try what’s advised above?

Hanna

September 12, 2016 at 10:16 pm

Hi!

Random question. Does my ex sending me a snap chat count as him initiating a conversation/text???

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 14, 2016 at 3:11 pm

Hi Hanna,

in a way, yes.

Brittany

September 12, 2016 at 8:54 pm

Hello, my boyfriend of 11 months just broke up with me three days ago and I was blindsided. We had been on trips recently, he met my entire extended family 3 weeks ago, and I had left for work on Thursday morning to a kiss and I love you (we don’t live together but had spent 2 nights per week together). We had planned things to do for October and even started planning another trip next summer. When he broke up with me, he said that he didn’t see a future for us. I texted him in a moment of weakness the next day asking him to reconsider (2 sentences) and he asked for space so I agreed and have not contacted him since. I am so confused as to where this came from and honestly want him back. We have had some difficulties related to his depression and a tendency to isolate when he becomes depressed and my anxiety kicking in when I don’t hear from someone as I normally would but thought that we were working through those together. Any thoughts or advice?

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 14, 2016 at 3:06 pm

Hi Brittany,

Try doing just 21 days. Maybe he is going through something, and he needs to sort it out on his own.

Prerna

September 12, 2016 at 5:07 pm

Hi.. I wish I could have come a little earlier here.
I am ashamed to admit that I begged to my bf for 6 months!!
Then I told him it seems you don’t want me in your life. And I would never message you
It’s been a month I haven’t messaged him but he knows I still crave for him and waiting for him to come back
So what should I do now. How do I get him to text me. I am not even on his fb list

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 14, 2016 at 1:29 pm

Hi Prerna,

why and how does he know that you’re still chasing him?

Megan Thompson

September 12, 2016 at 7:02 am

I begged and pleaded with my ex for 6 months then I stopped contacting him after he blocked me, we then become close over the summer but when I told him I had feelings again he then went distance from which I returned to begging and pleading. He then said he was talking to a new girl and that I needed to move on because we would never get back together and that he was going to get feelings for other girls and threatened to block me again. Have I pushed him away to far by begging and pleading and ruined my chances?

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 13, 2016 at 6:24 pm

Hi Megan,

yes, you’ve pushed him away by begging and pleading but I can’t say that you’re really ruined your chances. But to be honest, for me, it would be longer than normal to get him back compared to a normal breakup.

Because first, you have to learn to really have your own life first, and be independent. So, that you don’t rush a guy on being with you and that you don’t beg for a guy to stay. Because no matter who you’re with, you take yourself with you. So, unless you change yourself, you will have the same problems over and over again.

Especially with him, that he already has that idea of you being hung up on him. For me, you have to do at least 6 months of no contact or even 1 year before trying to SLOWLY build rapport and attraction with him again and when you start to do that, don’t let go of yourself and your new routine to be with him.

rachel

September 10, 2016 at 3:21 am

So me and my ex broke up 2 months ago. It has been chaos ever since. He is alwys angry msging me claiming that i have slept with this guy and that. He has a long list of guys that he has made up in his mind that i have slept with. I have tried explaining to him countless times but he doesnt seem to be working. I even read the article that states if i have been falsely accused of cheating.
I have tried everything, i followed that article and not spoken to him for more than a week but i alwys ended up replying to him because of his angry msgs daily.
I got really fedup and i knew where he was working ysterday, i showed up and he wsnt pleased. We had a huge fight, with him walking away and me following him and him throwing his phone and asking me to leave but i didnt. I begged him to make it work with me but he kept refusing and saying he hasnt had feelings for me in a long time even when we were together. It was very hurtful, it ended up with him getting into his car and driving away.
I went home all numb and he continued angry msging me in the middle of the night, he sent me a video of him cutting up our picture together, That really HURT !
He is really angry at me and no matter what i do, he just keeps getting angry at me. He seems so adamant on never getting back together, he is at a point where he hates me ! He has been extremely angry at me for 2 months straight and after last night it got way worst ! I begged him to give us another try. It was a nightmare, when he got home that night, he sent me a video of him cutting up our pictures together that he had. That hurt really bad.
What should i do ? Please advice. Have I lost my every chance of getting him back as he is very angry with me.

EBR Team Member: Amor

September 10, 2016 at 11:51 am

Hi Rachel,

stop feeding the fire Rachel.. I know you’ll keep doing what you want to do and I understand that and I also think that’s the only way that can help you realize that the more you answer, the more you show up, the more you beg, the more it will make him angry or take advantage of that power by continuing to be angry at you.

You basically keep on reacting to him and it’s making him feel good. Take the high road. Ignore and improve yourself. Learn to live life that he’s the only who’s angry.

You’ve explained. That’s enough. Don’t lower your value by continuing to chase him.

Stop reacting to him.. It’s like you keep riding the worst ride in the carnival and expecting it to make you feel better the next time you ride it.

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923 thoughts on “You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed… I’m Here To Fix That”